to grow in town, too, of scholars, artisans, and
craftspeople. As we climbed the hill I noted the lights in
Ron Cumberland's potting studio, in the old stone
house now occupied by a museum curator, and in the
neatly kept cottages of a small but increasing bunch of
painters, writers, and musicians.
But even among these, Victor with his meticulous
appearance and deliberate city airs was a curiosity. Not
all the attention he attracted around town was entirely
benevolent, though he was working to change this.
"It probably," I said, "just makes him a natural
target for a guy like Reuben." I was trying to convince
myself, but in fact it wasn't Reuben Tate's behavior
that troubled me; it was Victor's. And the reason was
simple:
Victor didn't suffer fools gladly, especially with a
few martinis in him. And when your line of work involves
cutting holes in other people's heads and repairing
what you find inside there, you either develop a lot
of confidence or you find a way to fake it, somehow.
Which Victor had. He should have stood up to
Reuben Tate and blustered at him until it was Victor's
ear that Reuben decided to take a bite out of. It was the
only reaction consistent with Victor's character.
Instead he had looked frightened. And knowing
him as I did, I couldn't help suspecting that I understood
why.
"Hey. Going to invite me in?"
We had come to my own house on Key Street: an
enormous 1823 white-clapboard Federal with dark
green shutters, forty-eight tall, double-hung original
wooden windows, and the original stone foundation,
much patched but still as fundamentally solid as it had
been two centuries earlier when the oxcarts hauled the
granite blocks there, and the men laid them into the
cellar hole.
It's the rest of the house that is gradually falling
down, but that is the natural condition of very old
houses. As long as I kept working on it, I could stay
ahead of it.
I hoped.
"Oh, I guess you can come in," I told Wade. "Seeing
as your shaving kit's upstairs, and your clothes, and
your work stuff for tomorrow. We should try practicing
some restraint once in a while, though, don't you
think?"
He drew me nearer. Much nearer. "I'm practicing
it right this minute."
"Oh. Well, in that case, let us not delay," I managed,
and his answering chuckle implied absolutely no
restraint whatsoever.
Going in the back door, we met Monday, my black
Labrador retriever, who greeted us with her own canine
version of the old buck-and-wing, toenails clicking
on the hardwood kitchen floor.
"Hey, mush-head," Wade told the dog affectionately,
opening the refrigerator and the freezer at the
same time, and I really knew better than to accept the
chilled, cut-crystal flute of ice-cold, perfectly delicious
champagne he offered to me then.
But I did accept it, and the next one, too, so that
one way and another--
--and what with keeping the dog not only off the
bed but actually out of the whole bedroom--
--I forgot what Reuben Tate had said to my ex
husband, Victor, that night at La Sardina.
And I shouldn't have.
My name is Jacobia Tiptree, and when I first
came to Maine with my son, Sam, I had
ideas about how our lives would be, here.
For one thing, I thought I would go back
to Manhattan a lot. I was well fixed financially, still
reasonably young, and decent-looking; not gorgeous,
but my face didn't stop clocks. And I'd lived in the city
since I'd gotten off a Greyhound there at age sixteen,
alone, penniless, and without an idea of how to do
anything useful.
But nobody in the world is so interested in money
as a poor girl, and I'd pursued my fascination with a
vengeance, first at night school, eventually via grants
and graduate work. Soon I was managing large
amounts of other people's money along with my own,
and I'd become skilled at life in Manhattan:
I could get a cab in the rain, a good table at Four
Seasons, or a bagel so fresh that just by eating it, you
could learn whole phrases of vernacular Yiddish. In
short, I'd grown up in the city, and I thought I might
miss it. On the other hand, I was also miserable:
Victor's idea of an amicable divorce had turned out
to be one in which the parties stopped short of using
automatic assault weapons. No woman, no woman,
had ever dumped him before, and my doing so had
deeply affronted him; his idea of monogamy was serial
monogamy--he was faithful to the girlfriends, anyway,
although not to me--and the number in the series had
climbed to the triple digits by the time I bailed out. But
he still felt I was being unreasonable.
Then there was Sam, whose new attitude toward
me lay in the no-man's land between carelessness and
contempt. Since achieving puberty, a condition he ap
patently equated with immortality, he'd been running
with a posse of computer-literate young outlaws with
nicknames like Pillz, Wanker, and Doctor Destructo
357--this latter nom I had seen painted artistically in
bright, poisonous Day-Glo yellow on subway overpasses,
up there with the wrist-thick high-tension
cables, the sight of which did not reassure me in the
slightest--whose collective mission in life was, I gathered,
to hack into a top-secret military database and start
World War III.
At anything else--anything lawful--they were
hopeless, which was a part of what made them all so
angry. Sam could barely read, a problem that at the
time I attributed to his behavioral difficulties, and the
others had ditched school entirely. But their illiteracy
and general ineptitude overall was, to me, no particular
comfort; at World War III I thought this bunch might
succeed. For one thing, their personalities fitted their
goals: dark. Suicidally apocalyptic and brilliant.
Sam, I discovered during my bouts of shameless,
terrified eavesdropping, was especially useful to the
project, since while he could barely decipher the label
on a cereal box, he could fix absolutely anything. Even
while stoned on marijuana, which often he was without
even bothering to hide it anymore, he was a real
mechanical genius, unfortunately for civilization as we
know it.
As for the notion of discipline or a heart-to-heart
talk: oh, please. For all that boy listened to me, I might
as well have been speaking Urdu. I tried everything,
including a psychologist who believed in back-to-the
womb regression. When she turned on the sloshing
sound of the amniotic fluid and the lub-dub of what
was supposed to be his mother's heartbeat, Sam bolted
from her office and didn't come home for two days.
Toward the end, I found myself standing before a
Santeria shop window in a neighborhood up above
125th Street, desperately examining a display of magic
candles and some vials of powdered sheep entrails,
wondering if maybe ...
Well, I bought a candle--you can always use candles
--and a week later I discovered Eastport and fell in
love with it at once, in the same sudden, irreversible
way that a person might be struck by lightening or run
over by a bus.
The town was on Moose Island, as far up the
Maine coast as you can get, and reachable only by a
narrow causeway. There was no reeking smog, no hostile
gangs of drug-addled, dysfunctional little teenaged
computer terrorists. Also, there was no Victor, and to
get away from Victor at that point I'd have signed up
for a colony on Mars.
Still, even as I sold my Manhattan penthouse, complete
with twenty-four-hour uniformed doorman, private
elevator, and panoramic view of Central Park--
and even as I signed the papers that meant I
owned the shambling, dilapidated but utterly charming
antique house on Key Street, stepping into it afterward
filled with the shimmering knowledge that something
momentous had happened.
Even then, I had no intention of giving up my
status as a streetwise, dyed-in-the-wool New Yorker. I
would go back to the city often, I thought: on weekends,
and during Sam's school vacations.
All of which strikes me as fairly hilarious now, because
after a week in Eastport I forgot whether Park
Avenue runs uptown or downtown, and didn't care.
Soon whole chunks of my past life began dropping
away from me like pieces of a plaster body cast, leaving
me feeling liberated and exposed, my skin unaccustomed
to the air moving freely on it.
Meanwhile Sam's expression took on an odd listening
quality, as if he were hearing music. I held my
breath, waiting for the other shoe to drop; when he got
bored, I thought, he would start agitating to go back to
New York.
Instead he took up walking, from one end of the
island to the other. He scoured the shore for periwinkles
and beach glass, examined obsessively every boat
he could wheedle his way aboard, and returned in the
evenings with his face glowing pink from all the exercise
and fresh air. When he was home he ate like a
horse, slept like the dead, and said very little, but when
he did speak, he spoke politely.
And there was another thing, which he only confided
to me later: in those first days, he really had been
hearing music. The tune--he could hum it straight
through, and a local Historical Society member eventually
heard him, and identified it--was an old one, written
by a man who had once lived in our house. Town
legend hinted that he had died there, too, and under
mysterious circumstances.
But when I learned all this, I was busy and preoccupied;
at the time, Victor had just begun threatening
to move to Eastport. Probably the tune had survived in
downeast Maine lore, I decided, and Sam had picked it
up somewhere, possibly from one of the men on the
boats.
So I paid little attention to the old town legend.
At the time.
I Early on the Saturday morning after our dinner
at La Sardina, Ellie White and I found