Wicked Nights (28 page)

“You’re comparing me to an addict?”

“Yes.” He scoffed. “Addy, you know better. That logical brain of yours will kick in at some point and you’re going to say, ‘Wow, I’m glad I didn’t fuck up my life by getting back together with him’.”

Her heart ached. “So this is it. No matter what, we can’t be together?”

“Yeah. This is it. I should have never pushed for it. I should have just taken care of my business so it didn’t affect you.”

She glanced around the room, trying to keep her emotions in check. “Do you need a lawyer for your mess?”

His side of the line went silent for a moment. “I’ve got Lila finding us a new one. I thought I could salvage that relationship for the sake of the club, but I don’t think it’s a good idea. I think it’s best to cut all strings and go our separate ways.”

Addison shook her head. She took a deep breath and swiped the tears from her eyes. He sounded so closed off. He didn’t say anything that lacked logic. She’d said the very same things the night he’d dropped her off at the hotel. The emotional rollercoaster of it all had come to an abrupt end. Somewhere deep inside, she probably knew it was for the best. It didn’t make it easier for her to accept, though.

* * * *

After calling a contractor to fix the rest of her office, Addison decided to start planning what she wanted to do with her house. Thankfully, the contractor was willing to give her an estimate and she honestly didn’t have the time or energy to search around town for someone else. She’d chosen Stuart and Sons at Mason’s recommendation. The people were really nice and had decent prices. She inspected the work they’d done and she had to admit, they did a good job.

She stood in the middle of her living room making notes of what needed to be taken out and put in storage while they worked on the gaping hole in her ceiling. She clicked her TV on to see if it worked and spotted Jesse’s name at the bottom of the screen. It had only been a few days since the event, but she turned up the volume while the reporter talked.

Somehow they’d linked Jesse to the Skulls, identifying information in the police car as threatening evidence. The car had been parked outside a known hangout of the Skulls. Camera evidence at the jail suggested that Marco and Jesse had worked together and now Marco Fowler faced charges of harming a police officer. The more she listened, the more she couldn’t believe that they actually pinned the Skulls fire on Jesse. Or Jesse’s death on Marco.

“Oh, they’re good.”

“Who?”

Addison glanced up and smiled at her mother. She clicked off the TV. “No one.”

As promised, her mother had decided to take some time off to help Addison get her house back in order. She didn’t know how long it would actually take, but she enjoyed the company of having her mother around. Even if their personalities clashed and they got on each other’s nerves, her mother was her rock through everything.

“You’ve got that sad look on your face again.” Lora frowned. “Have you called him?”

“Yes. It didn’t do any good. An outlaw biker and a lawyer simply don’t go together.”

Lora went to the built-in shelves and started to sort through what was salvageable. “You do know love is unconditional. You say you love him, but you can’t pick and choose which parts. If you love him, you love all of him—the good with the bad.”

Addison propped her hands on her hips as she glanced around the room. “Maybe love isn’t enough.”

Lora nodded. “I’d still give it another shot. You started your relationship in the midst of chaos. That’s not the foundation for a solid relationship. You need to get to know one another outside the pressures of your lives. You’re a busy lawyer. He’s an outlaw biker. At some point, you’re going to have to simply be Addison and he’s going to have to be Mason. If you’re truly meant to be together, then that’s okay. That’s enough.”

Addison saw her mother’s point, but it seemed like a futile effort to try again. “He compared me to a drug addict.”

Lora stopped going through the bookshelf and turned towards her. “Why?”

“Because he said leaving him was my withdrawal and I only wanted him back for a temporary high and that I didn’t really care what it meant in my life.”

“Was he right?”

Addison shook her head. “I don’t know. My emotions have been getting the best of me.”

Her mother tossed some books into a nearby box. “I suggest trying for some normalcy. You be Addison and tell him to be Mason. Not the lawyer and the biker, just the man and the woman. See what happens from there.”

Telling Mason to not be a biker was like telling Einstein to not be smart. She pulled out her phone and punched his number before she chickened out. It didn’t take him long to answer.

“Can you talk for a minute?”

“I guess.” He sounded like he walked away from the commotion. “What do you want?”

She walked towards her bedroom, out of earshot from her mother. “Another shot.” She swallowed. “I don’t want to think about us being the outlaw biker and the snotty lawyer, but just you and me. The man and the woman having dinner together.”

He didn’t say anything for a long time. Addison checked her phone to make sure he hadn’t hung up.

“You want to date?”

“Mason, everything we’ve been through has revolved around me defending you and the club, or you and the club protecting me. I want to take that out of the equation. I want to go someplace nice and get to know the man you are while you get to know the woman I am. No biker, no lawyer. No sex. Just the two of us seeing if we really are compatible or not.”

He let out a sigh. “Why do you think that this will make anything different?”

“I don’t know, but I want to try.” She assumed that he’d say no. He didn’t like doing anything outside his normal comfort zone. Since he didn’t really date, per se, she assumed this was out of his comfort zone. “Will you at least try?”

“Yeah.” He didn’t sound too enthused, but at least he’d said yes.

“Good.” She gave him the address of where she wanted him to meet her.

“Are you making me get dressed up for this?”

She smiled. “Yes. It is a date.”

He groaned.

“You’ll be fine. I’ll see you at six.” Addison hung up and, for the first time, felt some sense of hope for their future. It could be a total disaster, but she wanted to try it out. She deserved at least that much.

Chapter Fourteen

Mason wore a new white shirt and denim pants. It was the best he could do as far as dressing up went. His cut stayed at his house with the boots he normally favoured. If Addison thought there could be something between them, then who was he to keep telling her no. He wanted it too. He wanted there to be a way to work everything out.

He arrived at the dock where she’d told him and parked his truck. Her little Mercedes was there and he took a deep breath before getting out. She had evidently rented a yacht for the evening and he felt like a complete fool. This was completely out of his comfort zone and he had not one fucking clue what to do about it.

She stood from the table, nearly taking his breath away. The slinky red dress fell just above her knees, her hair gathered in a messy bun at the base of her neck. She waved him over and he stepped onto the deck, glancing around the boat.

“You really wanted to get us away from the biker-lawyer thing, didn’t you?”

She smiled. “Yes.”

He stared at her a moment. She looked beautiful. The sun had started to set behind her and the whole scene was out of some damn sappy movie. Addison moved to the table in the middle of the main deck.

“We’re having a full course meal. I got us a bottle of Pinot Grigio to go with the grilled shrimp.” She sat in her chair and motioned for him to sit across from her.

He took his seat and tried to relax.

“You look like you’re scared to death.”

Mason laughed. “Not scared. Just confused as to where this is going.”

“I want us to see more than our occupations.”

“And you think that’s possible?”

She shrugged.

“Addy, we may like the person, but the occupation is still a big part of both our lives.”

She chewed on her lower lip. “Fine. It was a stupid idea. You can go.”

For a moment, he contemplated leaving. She wasn’t a person who did anything lightly. She went through all the trouble of setting this up and wanted to give up so easily. He took a moment to contemplate the situation and tried a different approach.

“You look beautiful.”

She stood. “Thanks.”

He watched as she walked to the side of the yacht away from him. She squeezed the railing and stared out at the marina. Thoughts of what to do next rolled around in his mind. It’d only been a few days since Jesse’s death and as adamant as Addison had been about leaving him for the same old reason she’d given him before, she was ready to come back again. Most likely pretending it didn’t happen, or it wouldn’t happen again.

“Addy?”

“Just go.”

He stood and glanced towards the dock. “How did you see this going in your head?”

“Not like this.”

“Tell me then.”

“I thought we’d get to know each other. Obviously, that’s not an option.”

He walked towards her. “You don’t think we know each other?”

She turned towards him. “No. I don’t know you. You lie to me. You keep secrets from me. You do a whole bunch of other things that I don’t approve of.”

“So I just spill my heart out and you’ll understand?”

She shook her head. “I don’t understand. I’m starting to get that I never will.”

He turned towards her. “You can’t understand because you’re not the one in control.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You like control, babe. That’s why you resisted me the first night. You resisted the prospects help the second. I had to force you to accept my protection and that perhaps I really did know what I was doing. You listened for a little while, then you went rogue on me again. You don’t approve of murder and I don’t think we need to analyse why, but you knew somewhere deep inside that it would happen. It’s not the shock of the action that got to you, it was the fact that even though I knew you disapproved, I did it anyway.”

His gut had twisted in knots since the incident occurred. He didn’t like the idea of Addison watching what had happened, but he hadn’t had any other choice. She’d just happened to be there when shit went down. Jesse had probably wanted it that way too.

“So you think I’m trying to control you?”

“Aren’t you?”

She shook her head. “I don’t even know what to say to that.”

“You try to control this relationship too.”

She lifted her head and stared at him. “How?”

“You say what goes. If you want to leave, then you leave. Then you come back when you’ve decided it’s okay to come back. Like with this. You really thought that our having a normal dinner on a yacht would change the facts that are on the table? You’re still you and I’m still me. We know that about one another.”

“I left because you’re too intense.”

“You left because you were scared of what you were feeling and the fact that you didn’t have control over it.”

“So with the whole Jesse situation, I should have just stayed and hashed it out with you?”

“Yeah, if that’s what needed to happen.”

She folded her arms over her chest. “Fine. I don’t get you. There are no clear boundaries with what you will do. How do I know that later down the road I’m not going to end up like him? I could piss you off one day, I’m quite good at it actually, and who’s to say that won’t be my fate? Does the no-hitting clause have a no-shooting women addendum?”

Mason finally got to the bottom of it. She was scared of him. “The fact that you even ask that proves to me that this will never work.”

“What else am I supposed to think?”

“It goes both ways, Addison. How do I know that you won’t go to the cops about me or my club? I trust you, that’s how. I’m not scared of you or your power. You obviously don’t feel the same about me and that isn’t something I can fix.”

“If I went to the cops, you would get life in prison.” She met his eyes. “It’s not the same thing.”

“Yet you still want to be with me.”

She shook her head. “There are good parts to you. That’s what I miss the most.”

He licked his lips. “There’s nothing good about me. The quicker you realise that, the better off you will be.”

Mason turned to leave and wondered why the hell he’d given in and came. She was scared of him, which didn’t really surprise him all that much, but the hurt that came along with it did. He didn’t like that feeling. Mason rarely allowed himself to feel anything, but Addison opened up a freaking floodgate when she entered his life.

He thought she really cared, but in reality, she was no better than any other girl who walked into his bedroom and opened her legs.

* * * *

The next week, Addison focused on getting her house in order. Ashley helped her set up the office and they planned to reopen the next Monday. Addison’s old life was back, and she should have felt happy about it. Occasionally, she’d hear motorcycles pass by and her mind would drift to Mason and the guys. She wanted to solve everything, but finally determined that it couldn’t be fixed.

A knock sounded at her door and Addison went to answer it. Lila stood on the other side, a slight smile on her face.

“What are you doing here?”

She stepped inside and gave Addison a brief hug. “Well, I wanted to see how things were coming along. Maybe talk to you for a bit.”

“What do you want to talk about?

“You. Mason. The club.”

Addison scoffed and moved towards the kitchen. “That’s old news.”

“Not really. Mason told me what you said to him.”

Addison reached for a soda in the fridge and offered Lila one. “Which part?”

“How you question the boundaries of what he would do. You’re scared of him. You don’t trust him, yet you still want him.” Lila popped the top of her drink. “Why do you think those things?”

Addison stood on one side of her kitchen bar while Lila stood on the other. “I don’t know.”