Wicked Wonderland (15 page)

Rachel got into the bitterly cold car and dumped her purse next to her seat.“I’m sorry I’m late,” she said as she hunted for the seat belt.

Nikki didn’t say anything. Rachel glanced at her friend. “Are you okay?”

Nikki cocked her head to one side and stared at Rachel. “There’s tinsel in your hair.”

Rachel froze and hurriedly smoothed her gloved hands along her ponytail. Sure enough, the prickly metal was caught in the rubber band.

“Strange. I don’t know how that got there,” she murmured.
I don’t know how I missed it!

Nikki shrugged and put the car in reverse. “Probably happened when you and Justin were fooling around.”

Rachel’s hands dropped into her lap and she stared open-mouthed at her friend. “Okay, how did you know that?” A horrible thought occurred to her. She dipped her chin down and braced herself for the possibility. “Did you see us behind the Christmas tree?”

Nikki stepped on the brakes.“Behind the Christmas tree?” Her smile was wide and proud. “Tell me more. Which one? Is it still standing?”

Rachel pressed her fingertips against her forehead. She felt a headache coming on. “Forget I said anything. How did you know? I was so careful.”

“Too careful,” Nikki informed her as she left the parking space and shoved the car into drive. “I could tell by the way you guys
weren’t
looking at each other. Don’t worry. I haven’t heard any rumors.Your secret is safe with me.”

Rachel relaxed. “Thanks.”

Nikki was silent for a moment and then slapped Rachel on the arm. “But why didn’t you tell me? I gave you every opportunity.”

Rachel covered her face with her hands.“Because I’m embarrassed.” She had no willpower around the man.

“Why? You and Justin are a good thing. It’s a reason to celebrate.” Nikki thumped the steering wheel to punctuate her point. “What are you getting him for Christmas? I vote for handcuffs.”

“Whoa.Whoa.Whoa.” Rachel waved her hands to stop her friend’s naughty Christmas list. “No celebrating. No presents. And definitely no handcuffs.”

“Why not?” Nikki whined.

“Don’t you get it? I slipped up. I had a major relapse. For two years I have walked the straight and narrow. No wild nights, no boyfriend drama, and no policemen knowing me on a first-name basis. I’ve kept a job, an apartment, and food in my refrigerator.”

“Even more reason to celebrate.”

“No. Because I feel like it could all fall apart any minute. When I’m with Justin—just looking at him, thinking about him—I forget everything.” She weakly closed her eyes and rested her head on her seat. “All I want is him, and nothing else matters. If I keep this up, I’m going to be right back where I was. Staggering into work from an all-nighter, hooking up with one loser after another, and living on your couch again.”

“I don’t know what you’re worried about,” Nikki said as she concentrated on driving on the icy road. “Justin is nothing like the men in your past.”

“That’s true. He’s worse.” She didn’t get this hot this fast for any guy.

“No way.” Nikki gave her a quick look. “Worse than the guy who kept stealing from you?”

She gave that a thought and nodded her head. “Yep, Justin is worse than Vincent.”

“Wow,” Nikki said with a touch of concern.“I didn’t think anyone could top him.”

Rachel wiggled in her seat, uncomfortable with the notion that Justin was rock bottom on her list of men. “Vincent was a jerk, but he wasn’t dangerous. Justin is different. I feel weak.” She struggled to describe it. “I feel . . . crazy. I feel . . .”

“Alive?” Nikki suggested.

“Alive,” Rachel repeated. She bit her bottom lip as she remembered the warm, thick heat that flooded her body when Justin . . . Rachel abruptly sat up. “
No
, not alive. I feel out of control. It’s like he’s my kryptonite.”

Nikki stopped at the red light and looked over at her. “Then you’re in trouble, Superman, because Justin is here to stay. And you can’t afford to quit your job when you haven’t been there for a full year.”

Her fun-loving friend made a practical point she should have thought of days ago. It was an indication of how far gone she was.“So what do I do?” Rachel asked.“I swear if I see him again, I’ll rip his shirt off.”

“You were doing just fine until the Christmas party,” Nikki said as she watched the stoplight, waiting for it to turn green. “What happened?”

“I don’t know.” Rachel had been wondering the same thing. Where had it all gone wrong? “I was walking toward my cubicle to get my purse and he was putting a file on my desk. He said something, I shot him down, and the next thing you know, we’re all over each other and tangled in the tinsel.”

“Hmm, that doesn’t give me much to go on,” Nikki said as she continued to drive. “Who made the first move?”

Rachel cringed. “Me.”

“Really?”Nikki drew the word out and wagged her eyebrows suggestively.“What happened right before you pounced?”

“I don’t know. He was his usual flirty self. I don’t know what made it different.”

“Well, you better figure out before it happens again.” Rachel was surprised by Nikki’s warning.“I thought you’d be ecstatic about these new developments.”

“I am,” she insisted, tucking her tongue in the corner of her mouth as she made a tricky turn. “But if the boss catches you having sex in the office, you’re out of a job.”

“Oh, right. I know that.” She realized she hadn’t given their tryst behind the tree much thought. “Ugh! See what Justin does to me?”

“And then you’ll be back to square one.”

She shuddered at the idea. She didn’t want to go back to that stage again. It was ugly, painful, and scary.

“Here’s my advice,” Nikki said. “All you have to do is figure out what’s triggering these sex cravings so you can control them and jump Justin after hours.”

Rachel leaned back in her seat and sighed. “How about if I just don’t jump Justin?”

“Well, that’s one option.” Nikki flashed a naughty smile and waggled her eyebrows again. “But what’s the fun in that?”

R
achel hurried out of the store, her shopping bags banging against the doorframe and her legs. She was running behind on her Christmas to-do list and was taking the opportunity to find a few more presents during her lunch break.

In fact, she was trying to come up with a list of excuses to get out of the office. She’d do just about anything to steer clear of the building. Away from temptation. Away from Justin.

It really was bad luck that her cubicle was right across the corridor from Justin’s. She was hyperaware of everything he did. Every hour she became more distracted. If this kept up, she was going to miss her project’s deadline.

She walked across the courtyard of the open-air mall. Rachel was sure the setup was supposed to make her think of a quaint outdoor marketplace, but the climate in the mountains didn’t always make shopping convenient. It snowed six months of the year, and rained the other six months. Most of those days she’d prefer to be inside instead of wrestling with the elements.

But having the open-air mall outdoors at Christmas kind of made it worth it.A light snow drifted on the brick sidewalks, and made the evergreen and red ribbons so much brighter. In the middle of the courtyard there was a gigantic fir tree decorated with gold ornaments and colorful lights, which reminded her of the magic and wonder of Christmas.

And what she did with Justin.

Rachel abruptly looked away.
Stop thinking about Christmas trees. Move away from the fir tree and don’t look back....

She dipped her head and hurried out of the courtyard. She needed to get back to the office. She’d had plenty of time to get some fresh air and clear her head.

Rachel strode to the street corner, hearing the rhythmic bell chime. She looked up just in time to see Justin at the corner pouring a handful of change into a bright red charity bucket. Rachel rocked back on her heels. Justin hadn’t seen her as he was talking to the bell chimer. She was very tempted to turn back and find a different route to the office.

Justin glanced up just when she was about to turn around. Great. This was what she got for hesitating. She braced herself and walked to him.

“Hi, Justin. Getting some last-minute shopping done?” she asked breezily. Or what she hoped was breezily. It was difficult to pull off when her pulse skittered.

“No way. You can’t get me in the stores the week of Christmas.”

Rachel pressed the button for the walk sign, unable to concentrate in Justin’s proximity. The bell ringer wasn’t helping much either.
Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
There was no deviation from the monotonous rhythm.

“I love shopping the week of Christmas,” Rachel told Justin. “It’s all about the hunt.The challenge.”

“Sounds like hell to me,” Justin said as he stood beside her, his arm almost touching hers. “Which is why I do everything online.”

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
Rachel frowned. Why did that sound so familiar? Was it a song she’d heard before? “You don’t know what you’re missing.”

“Believe me, I do. I spent most of my childhood in malls.”

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
Wow, that bell was really getting annoying. “Were you a store clerk?”

“My mother is a shopaholic. Christmastime was the worst.”

“Ah.” That could explain why he wasn’t much into celebrating. He had seen the dark side of the season.
Jingle . . . jingle ... jingle ...
“But you got lots of presents, right?”

“More like a new Christmas theme each year. The worst was probably the pink Christmas.” He shuddered from the memory. “Pink wreath and pink Christmas tree. Lots of Barbie and flamingo ornaments. Pink stockings and pink candy. I can’t stand the taste of peppermint thanks to that Christmas.”

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
Rachel stiffened as she suddenly remembered where she’d heard the bell. It wasn’t a song! It was the sound she heard when she was behind the Christmas tree with Justin!

“Uh, yeah.” She squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to forget the shaking bell ornaments on the office Christmas tree. “I really can’t picture an all-pink Christmas.”

“Don’t try, it will give you nightmares.”

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
Rachel lurched for the signal button and smacked it with her open palm. “What is wrong with this crosswalk?”

“It’s always slow.”

Jingle . . . jingle . . . jingle . . .
The memories crashed and mingled in front of her eyes like a kaleidoscope. The scent of fresh evergreen and the salty taste of Justin’s skin. The flash of red ribbon and the lust glazing in Justin’s blue eyes. The shaking of the bell at every thrust, and Justin whispering hot, sexy words as he buried himself deep inside her.

Sweat trickled down her spine as she took a deep breath of cold air.
Bad move.
The scent of the evergreen decorations was powerful. She tried to take small, shallow breaths.
Oh, even worse.

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
Her breasts started to ache, her nipples tightening as she remembered Justin’s big, rough fingers. Her hips twitched as the heat billowed inside her.

Jingle ... jingle ... jingle ...
She remembered exactly how Justin slammed his cock into her. At first it had been deep and measured. Until he lost control. And then he drove into her, fast and furious.

Rachel whimpered when her core clenched with need. She dropped her shopping bags as her knees buckled. But she didn’t fall down. Justin had caught her by the arm.

“Rachel? What’s wrong?”

Justin gathered her close. His face was right above her, his mouth a kiss away. His body wrapped around hers, his heat, his scent driving her over the edge. She clasped her hands on both sides of his face and slammed her mouth against his.

She pressed her fingertips against the stubble on his cheeks as she kissed him greedily. He tasted exactly as she remembered. Hot, masculine, and forbidden. She couldn’t get enough, dipping her tongue past his lips.

Justin held her tightly against him. He drew her tongue deep into his mouth and sucked hard. Rachel gasped as she felt the pull straight to her sex. She rubbed her aching breasts against his chest, hating the barrier between them.

A car horn pierced through her sensual fog. Rachel jerked back and stared at Justin’s face. His face was ruddy, his features taut, and his blue eyes clouded with desire.

Rachel swallowed hard and dropped her hands from his face. “I am so sorry.” She wasn’t sure what to say. Or how to explain what came over her. “I didn’t mean to do that.”

“I don’t mind.” He sounded composed, but he looked ruffled and undone. Slightly baffled and pleasantly surprised.

She took a step back and felt the resistance in Justin’s arms before he reluctantly let go of her. Rachel bent down and grabbed her bags. “I’m really sorry.”

“I’m not,” he assured her.

She looked wildly at the street and saw the blinking red light for pedestrians. Rachel sprinted across the crosswalk and hoped Justin wouldn’t follow.

So much for getting a clear head, she thought as she ran the rest of the way to the office. If anything, the shopping expedition made it worse. The bells, the evergreen trees, the decorations ... everything Christmas.

Christmas. Rachel shuffled to a stop, huffing big puffs of air.
It’s all about Christmas!
Every time she slipped up, something about the holidays triggered her relapse.
No . . . that can’t be right.
That was crazy. Or was it?

 

“Nikki?” Rachel whispered urgently an hour later as she stepped into her friend’s work space. “Nikki!”

Justin paused as he heard Rachel’s confidential tone. He sat alone in a nearby cubicle, going over Leah’s work for their project. Leah had left early for the day to start her vacation. Now that he thought about it, this floor was so quiet it felt abandoned. Rachel and Nikki probably thought they were alone. He should let his presence be known.