Wild (19 page)

“And because you wanted me to stay,” I said softly because the words seemed foolish even to my ears.

“Wanting to hold you after I pound into that sexy body is wanting more? Eating takeout on my floor is more? Bullshit, Kat. Tell me the truth.”

I sucked in my lip and gnawed at it with my teeth. I was so pissed that he was trying to get more out of me, trying to learn about my past. That was why I’d come here, to start fresh, to escape, and opening up to him would shoot that to shit.

“My marriage didn’t end well. I don’t want commitment; my faith in the institution, in any committed relationship, is shit, so I just don’t want to go there with us. We’re good as friends.”

“Friends who fuck,” he reminded me.

“Right, and I don’t want more. And last night sounded like a lot more.”

“Guess it depends what your version of
more
is, but staying the night after I’ve been inside you isn’t more for me. It’s sleep.”

“That’s a slippery slope,” I mumbled.

“Not for me, it’s not.”

I narrowed my eyes at him, taking him in, processing his words.

“We okay, Sugar?” He slid a palm down my side and landed at my hip, giving it a soft squeeze.

“I guess.” I turned to the coffee maker, avoiding his gaze. “You want coffee?”

“Fighting to coffee just like that, huh?”

I shrugged as I waited for his answer. My shoulders hunched, tears pricking behind my eyelids. My life was beginning to feel out of control. My past was becoming suffocating; being with Lane was becoming more than I ever intended. I was afraid that I was in over my head. Lane deserved more from
someone
, just not me.

“Always ready for a fight, aren’t ya, Sugar?” He turned me in his big arms and ran his nose up the line of my neck, inhaling my scent. Flutters erupted in my tummy as he held me to him.

I stood still, unwilling to wrap my arms around him, unwilling to give him more of me than I had to give, but not ready to push him away either.

“I’d love some coffee.” He placed a soft kiss on my lips as his thumbs worked along my jaw. I melted against him and hoped to shit I wasn’t landing myself in more trouble than I was already in.

“So what’s up with you and Kat?” Slade took a long chug of his beer. We sat at Pete’s, playing pool, but only half-heartedly. Two guys meeting to bullshit over beers could be a little gossipy, we needed the pretext of pool or darts to pull it off.

“I don’t know.” I shrugged as I shifted my feet, my eyes taking in the lay of the table.

“So, you’re fucking.”

“Obviously.”

“Anything else there?”

“Maybe. She says no, but she’s different.”

“She’s hot as fuck.”

“Yeah, there’s that.” I grinned and ran a hand through my hair. “But she’s hiding something. I don’t know what it is, why she’s here. It’s fucked up though.”

“You ever ask?”

“Of course, idiot.”

“Well, sometimes you just need to be straight forward.”

“Have you ever known me to not be straight forward?”

“No.” He shrugged as he nodded at the bartender to bring us another round of beers. Dillon wasn’t working tonight, Slade had insisted we come tonight, no other night of the week when Dillon usually worked. The whole game surrounding them was off.

“So you and Dillon . . .?” I glanced at him. His body tensed as he shuffled the cue between his hands.

“What?” His eyes remained averted.

“You fuckin’?”

“No.”

“Seriously?” I threw him an exasperated look.

“A few times.” He shrugged.

“Come on fucker, stop being a pussy. It’s obvious from a mile away that something’s going on between you two.”

“Fine, we’ve fucked. What else is there to say?”

“Apparently a lot the way you two were fighting the other night.” I pointed my cue at him.

“You saw, huh?” He winced.

“I don’t think anyone in this bar didn’t. You shouldn’t get involved with her, man. You know how she is.”

“How is she?” His dark eyes narrowed as he hit me with a warning glare.

“Fuck, you’re already in over your head. I told you, man, everyone in town’s hit that. Dillon doesn’t do more, if you want to fuck her, fuck her. Get your rocks off, do what you need to do, but you get in trouble when you start expecting more.”

“Fuck you.” Slade growled before leaning down to take a shot. He sunk a stripe, perfectly. Too bad I’d already called stripes.

“Look, you always fucking do this. You think it’s just fucking, but it’s not. It never fucking is, you twat. When are you going to learn that? And with Dillon of all people.”

“Okay, enough about me prick. You’re fucking the new girl in town who won’t tell you a goddamn thing about herself, you’re in over your fucking head and you’re the only one that can’t see it. Pot meet fucking kettle.” He pinned me with a glare.

I stood still for a minute letting his words process before a laugh escaped my throat.

“You fucker.” I shook my head and leaned over to sink two balls before missing the third. I straightened just as Murphy stepped up, a smile on his face and a faded black eye staring back at me. ”What the fuck happened to you?” 

“You didn’t hear?” Slade nodded at the waitress as she set our beers down and indicated for her to bring another for Murphy. 

“Obviously not.”

Murphy shook his head between the two of us. “Guy came into the store, some fancy city asshole, wants to buy all this shit and then passes me a credit card. When I told him we don’t take ‘em, he goes off, yelling, and throwing shit around. Popped me one right in the eye. Had to call the police. He bolted before they got to the store, though.” 

“Fucking tourists stayin’ later and later every year,” Slade shook his head. 

“Jesus Christ,” I muttered. 

“It’s fine. I’ve taken worse. I was in the Corps.” He smacked the United States Marine Corps tattoo that I knew was on his forearm. 

I twisted the cue between my fingers. “When did that happen?”

“Over a week ago.” Slade answered. “You really are out of the fucking loop with this girl, man. Handed your balls right over didn’t ya?”

“Fuck off. Pot meet kettle.”

He only laughed and guzzled more of his beer.

We walked down the snowy main street. The sidewalk was covered in a fine dusting of white powder, Christmas lights were strung along the lamp poles and twinkling from the little shop windows. It was mid afternoon on a Saturday and the town was bustling. People filtered in and out of stores, trying to get Christmas shopping done before everything was picked over.

Lane’s hand was locked in mine, the rough timbre of his voice as he spoke about something his best friend, Slade, had done that was nagging at him. Apparently Lane had caught sight of a heated conversation between Slade and someone at the bar, and Slade had been evasive when Lane had questioned him. I hadn’t spent much time with Slade, though he seemed perfectly nice, but not someone that warmed up to people quickly.

I was only half paying attention when my eyes landed on a car parallel-parked on the street. My gaze took in the red and white license plate.

Ohio
in blue letters.

My blood pulsed through my system as my mind flashed back to the pictures of that night.

A mangled car caught in a grove of trees, halfway down a ravine.

Skid marks on a wet road.

Twisted metal and shattered glass.

Yellow tape and a stretcher.

Tears pricked at my eyelids and an aching lump formed in my throat.

I tightened my hand in Lane’s as I forced the fear back, willing myself to avoid the panic attack at the memory of her death.

It ate away at me. I thought about her every day, the pain never easing, even though it had been two years.

“Okay, Sugar?” Lane stopped and tilted his head down to me.

“Yeah.” I shook my head, chasing the memory from my mind.

“Okay.”

I concentrated on the soft timbre of his voice as he murmured in my ear how beautiful I looked. I tucked my nose into his throat and inhaled his spicy scent.

I still warred with myself over this new, non-relationship we had, and holding hands as we walked down the street wasn’t helping anything, but Lane insisted. He was so fucking caveman, it drove me insane with equal parts irritation and desire.

I smiled up at him, reassuring him that I was fine, before we turned and continued down the sidewalk. He traced small circles on my wrist with the pad of his thumb as we walked and took in some of the seasonal displays.

“Fuck,” I heard him murmur as he stopped, my arm jerking as I turned to find his feet planted firmly on the sidewalk.

“What?” I scrunched my eyebrows together as I took in his clenched jaw. I followed his glare to find a couple, his arm around her, as they peered in a display window. My eyes followed up his lean form to a flash of dark, messy hair. Then the couple turned, the woman grinning, a radiant smile splitting her face before she turned to face us. Her smile fell from her lips as she registered us. She looked familiar. I’d seen her before.

“Lane, who is that?” My mind struggled to put the pieces together. “Lane?” I turned to look up at him, his eyes trained on the couple. I looked back and found them staring, a pained look on the woman’s face.

“It’s her.” The picture flashed in my mind as I realized this was his ex-fiancée.

“Lane.” The man stepped close enough to be heard.

“Ridge.”

Oh my God, this was his brother. With his ex. They were together. The bitterness when Lane had mentioned his brother’s name suddenly all made sense.

“Mia.” The name fell so softly from Lane’s lips, the pain they’d shared evident. I dropped my hand from his and the instinct to run took over. I needed to leave, couldn’t be witness to this. This was it. I’d been pushing him away all along because it was
so
not smart for us to be together on so many levels— my past, his, the danger it held for us—but I’d finally let him in, just the smallest bit, and here we were, snow falling softly around us, his eyes locked with his ex-fiancée’s.

“We’re just in town visiting Mia’s parents,” his brother said nearly apologetically. The pain swirled in Ridge’s steely blue eyes. Whereas Lane’s beautiful blue eyes normally sparkled with mischief, this guy’s looked dark, pained, as if he’d been to hell and back and couldn’t be bothered to hide any of it.

“This is Kat.” Lane slung an arm over my shoulder and tucked me into him. I peered up at him, confusion warring inside me. I was sure he would push me away, sure he would run, this would ruin him. His past standing before us here on this snowy sidewalk.

But he wasn’t.

His thumb stroked the back of my neck and under my thick hair, lovingly. His stance seemed to ease and the lightness in his eyes returned. I swallowed and placed my hand on his torso, showing him I was here. For him. With him.

“Nice to meet you, Kat. I’m Ridge.” He held a hand out.

“This is my brother.” Lane smiled down at me, his full lips curling deliciously and causing my heart to stutter.

“Nice to meet you.” I swallowed the painful lump in my throat as I shook Ridge’s hand.

“And this is Mia.”

“Hi,” I murmured and held her eyes. Pain radiated off her. She took me in, not in a jealous way, but like her heart had been shattered, like it was just as painful for her to see Lane as it was for him to see his brother, the man that had taken everything from him.

“Hope you enjoy your stay.” Lane nodded, ready to end the conversation.

“Lane—”

“Good to see you.” Lane offered out his hand. His brother, with the same arctic blue eyes and chocolate brown hair, looked down at it before looking up to Lane’s face. His eyes softened, the tension that had moments ago seemed to radiate off him eased, and he took Lane’s hand in his.

“Good to see you, too.” Ridge murmured, holding Lane’s hand in his own for a second longer than a guy normally would, his gaze never faltering. “Really good.” Ridge finally dropped his hand. Lane tucked me tighter into his shoulder and nodded before stepping around the couple in front of us and continuing down the street.