Wild Ways (20 page)

“Are you kidding me?” But she wasn’t. She really thought her hair color was bland. “Your hair is the color of red clover honey, amber ale, everything delicious. You are an incredible, sexy woman. I almost came just watching you.”

She kissed him hard, pulling herself even closer against him. Then she pushed him back on the bed and kissed down his neck, across his chest. He scrunched his fingers in her hair, stroking her scalp as her mouth moved over every inch of his stomach. Then she took his cock and sucked and kissed and licked, and he really had to fight the impending orgasm. He wanted to do that inside her. She moved down his legs, granting him mercy. Then she kissed all the way back up, over his cock and stomach.

He flipped her onto her back and took pleasure in the time that he hadn’t been able to indulge in earlier. He loved on her, giving every inch of her body the same kind of attention she’d given his. Her breath caught as he nibbled, suckled, licked, and kissed, and then she gasped when he spread her legs and his mouth did more of the same. He
made her come again and again, as she clutched the sheets and tried to wriggle away after the second orgasm. Then he worked his way across her stomach and breasts, then hovered over her to kiss her.

He ran the back of his hand down the side of her face, and all these crazy words crashed into his head. Like “mine” and “stay with me” and things he hadn’t thought in years. Back then he’d been a teenager. Now he was a grown man who knew what those words really meant. And the way she was looking at him, with big doe eyes, he guessed the same thing was happening to her. He kissed her so none of them would escape, not yet. Like a doe, she would spook.

“Any particular position that turns you on?” he asked instead. “I aim to please.”

“I haven’t tried that many. Pretty much the standards. But today, there was nothing standard about making love with you.” A slow smile spread across her face. “I loved that. So I’m game for anything.”

He grinned. “Music to my ears.” How many positions could they cover in one night, maybe into the early morning? After rolling on the condom, he pulled her to her feet and led her toward the dresser. “You can experience the real thing this time.”

She planted her hands on the edge, bending to the perfect height. He ran his hands over that sweet ass, remembering how tempting it had been in that grungy bathroom. Now he could indulge in more than pretend. He anchored his hands on her hips and drove into her wet heat. It felt like coming home after months of fighting in the deserts and sleeping on the ground. Like finally eating the foods he loved after going without. She felt … right.

He slowed down, leaning over to kiss down her spine as he caressed her ass. “Let’s change it up. We have a nice, soft bed. We should use it.” He gently withdrew.

She stood and turned in his arms, rubbing up against him. “That was much more interesting than in the bathroom.”

He chuckled. “I sure hope so.”

He picked her up, and she automatically wrapped her legs around his waist. He walked to the bed and laid her down, then settled her ankles on his shoulders. Diving into
her was another round of sweet heaven. She slid her hands across his chest as they moved together, her fingers clutching him with every thrust deep into her center. Her breaths came faster, and she closed her eyes and seemed to sink into the pleasure for a few minutes.

He rolled onto his back and let her drive for a while. She set a rapid pace with a body that moved in a whole new way. Undulating. Hips thrusting easily. Her hair fell like a curtain over them as she leaned down to brace her hands on either side of his face. Their mouths connected, hungry for more. Her breaths came in gasps as she moved up and down in a faster and faster rhythm. Then she sat back up again and braced herself on his chest.

Hold on until she goes
, he ordered himself. Because he could go so easily. Almost had, more than once.

She arched, her head thrown back, and released a sound of pure pleasure. All it took was her throbbing canal around his cock to shoot him off into space. He gripped her hips hard, and his whole body spasmed with his own pleasure. He let loose all of those words that wanted to explode, ending with her name. She collapsed on top of him, catching her breath.

He stroked her back and whispered, “Oh,
querida
, I can’t get enough of you.”

She buried her face in his neck. “Julian, I …” She held back the rest of her words, curling her fingers into the hair at the nape of his neck. But the way she’d uttered his name, he heard so much emotion. And so much fear.

* * *

I can’t get enough of you.

Julian’s words echoed in Mollie’s mind as she nestled into the heat and strength of his body. She had never slept so well, so deeply. Except for the time he’d left the bed during the night. Panic had electrified her when he stepped out of the room, and she thought he was sneaking out and leaving the mess of her behind. Ten minutes later he’d
returned, breathing heavily.

“Did you have a bad dream?” she’d mumbled as he slipped back into bed and wrapped his body around hers.

“No, just one of my prowlings. I jogged up and down the hallway.”

She’d nodded, burrowing into the confines of his body, and slid right back into sleep.

She couldn’t get enough of him either. Was that a content smile stretching across her face? Impossible. She must still be dreaming, because she felt so damned good here. Safe. Protected. Cherished.

“I want to stay here forever,” she murmured, snuggling even closer.

She felt fingers brush hair from her cheek. “I can arrange that.”

His sleepy-hoarse voice caressed her as much as his fingers did. His mouth brushed her jaw, a soft, gentle kiss.

“I think I love you,” she whispered, the words rolling out of her mouth even when she hadn’t been thinking them. Her eyes snapped open and she turned to find him watching her with amused surprise. “Oh, gawd, did I say that out loud?”

“I think you were still dreaming.”

He was letting her off the hook. That’s how he was, how he’d been from the beginning. Giving her space when she was breaking down in front of him and his friend Rath. But she had uttered those words, which meant they were lurking inside her, hiding from her fear and self-protection. And where had the protection been last night when she’d been doing a striptease just for him? When she’d asked for his touch in the woods?

She sat up, pulling the sheet with her. Which pulled it away from him, leaving him beautifully naked in the morning light. She shifted her gaze away, running her hand over her hair. “What am I doing?” she whispered, more to herself.

“Being easy.”

“Didn’t that panic you when I said those words? We’ve known each other
two days
.” She shook her head. “To even be dreaming words like that …”

“We’ve been through about a year’s worth of drama. And nothing panics me. You
were having a nice dream, the words slipped out. Forget about it, okay?”

“I was dreaming about you. Thinking …” How she wanted him in her life. Forever. She’d said that, too. “We have gone through a lot together. You’ve been my knight—”

“Don’t say it.” He held his hand out.

“But you have. And I’m getting attached, getting used to you being here. Needing you. I can’t let that happen. You’ll leave and I …” She’d be shattered. It wouldn’t be like when Jimmie had broken things off. She hadn’t needed him, hadn’t let him past her armor. As much as she’d tried, Julian had not only slipped past it, he’d stripped it away.

“You’ll what, Mollie?” he prodded.

Because that’s how he was, too, unwilling to let her turn away or shut out the truth. She pulled the sheets tighter.
I’ll be devastated
. She couldn’t let him know how deep she’d fallen.

He tugged the sheets from around her, a sort of armor in itself, leaving them both naked. “You don’t know me well enough to lump me in with your father, your sister, any of those needy guys you’ve dated, or Brick.”

She slid off the bed and grabbed clothes from her duffel bag. “You’re right, I don’t. Here’s what I do know. You cut off contact with your family. You’re a damned good shot. And … you might be a rogue who was kicked out of the SEALs for killing innocent people.” The words tumbled out from the subconscious place that wanted to protect her.

She walked to the bathroom, but before she could close the door, his hand stopped it.

His expression was hard. “What do you mean by that?”

Relief poured through her. This was much more comfortable than lying in his arms dreaming of forever like an idiot. Never mind that the price of that relief was a tearing at the edges of her heart. “I know you were kicked out of the military. But did I hear it from you? No, because while you’re happy to lecture me about my self-protective measures, you were holding a secret of your own.” She turned on the water.

“I didn’t tell you because I’m bound by confidentiality. How did you find out?”

She pulled up the rod, activating the shower. Then she stepped in, even though it wasn’t warm yet. “It doesn’t matter.”

“The hell it doesn’t.” He stepped right in along with her. “Someone’s trying to scare you away from me. Wait, it was that detective, wasn’t it?” Julian filled the space with his body and bristling energy. “You don’t get to throw that wall between us just because you’re afraid to feel something.” Droplets of water dripped down his hair and face as he stared her down.

He was right, of course.

She stepped behind the flow of water, to put some distance between them. “Yes, Boyd said he’d asked his cousin, who’s also a SEAL. He couldn’t say a lot about it, only that your team was suddenly discharged. Boyd put together what little he knew and found out your team stormed a compound in Mexico. Shot innocent people, including women and children.”

“Do you believe I killed innocents?”

She searched his eyes, seeing that the answer mattered. She knew deep inside that a man who’d done the things he’d done for her wasn’t a cold-blooded killer. “No. Not on purpose, anyway.”

He gave her a grateful nod. “I don’t suppose you would have cuddled in my arms and said you thought you loved me if you suspected I was some bloodthirsty psycho.”

“I was asleep!”

He chucked her chin, a knowing half smile on his face. “Yeah, you let yourself believe that.”

“You’re infuriating.”

He nodded in agreement. “Among other things.”

She met his gaze through the flow of the shower. Damn, she couldn’t do this. “But not a reckless killer.”

He released a long breath. “Now I see why Risk told Addie about the mission.”

“What? Who?”

“Never mind, it’s irrelevant to the conversation at hand.” He braced his hands on her shoulders. “I won’t let you use that as a wall. So I’m going to tell you information you must promise to keep to yourself.” When she nodded, he went on. “It was a sanctioned attack. The targets were supposedly double-crossing us, and we were assigned to take them out. Our intel assured us that there would be no women and children at the compound. But we were misled, and not only were innocent people on-site, someone tried to take us out. They killed our mission leader, which is how we were identified. We smelled a setup, maybe to expose our relationship with the violent organization the U.S. had been in bed with. Or to turn them against us. We don’t know. We did not shoot any women or children, but the target made it look that way. They threatened retaliation on American tourists, so my team took the fall to prevent collateral damage.”

“That’s not fair.”

“No, it wasn’t.” His expression shadowed. “But no one said life was fair, did they?”

She laughed, though it came out with a bitter tinge. “No kidding.” She took him in, with the water dotting his eyelashes. “But sometimes very fair things come out of the blue. Like you. I’m not sure why you took on my case, but I appreciate it very much.”

“Your situation tugged at my need for purpose, to do something right and just. The same reason I joined The Justiss Alliance.”

“And maybe I’m your way of making up for whatever happened at that compound.”

“I don’t have anything to make up for. Something about
you
drew me in. Is that so hard for you to comprehend?”

She didn’t want this to be about her. Too personal.

He stepped into the water and braced his hands on her face. “My poor Mollie, so brave and yet so afraid to open her heart and trust.”

She pushed him away. “I don’t need your pity. Now please leave so I can shower.”

“You know what you do need?” He stepped out. “You need to find out who you
are. Not ‘Mollie saving Di.’ Not ‘Mollie trying to protect herself from being hurt again.’ I liked the Mollie who did the striptease for me, and who asked for what she needed. I like that Mollie a lot. I bet you do, too.”

She threw one of the little bottles of shampoo at the door as he closed it. Then she sagged against the tile wall, taking deep breaths. Damn him.

Julian was like no other man she’d ever encountered. She didn’t know how to relate to him, to handle him. He didn’t need help, didn’t need her. But he wanted her.

She shivered. Yes, she did like that Mollie who had emerged under his coaxing … and prodding. She was a tender bud, a beautiful rose about to bloom. And so terribly vulnerable, that cutting it off at the stem was the only way to keep it from being crushed.

* * *

As Julian rinsed the shampoo from his hair a short while later, he could hear his
abuelo
’s voice:
Run as fast as you can, JuJu. This one’s going to break your heart
.

Not on purpose. Mollie would never hurt someone intentionally. She would be the one running in order to protect herself. The problem was that Julian could not give up on her yet. He dried off, wrapped a towel around his waist, and stepped out of the steamy room. The hotel was nice, one of the upscale chains. After everything she’d been through, he’d wanted Mollie to have a nice place to sleep. She’d had nice dreams, if her smile and pre-awakening words were any indication. His cousin had listened to eighties music well into the nineties, and Julian could remember a song by the Romantics about hearing his lover’s secrets when she talked in her sleep.