Will the Real Raisin Rodriguez Please Stand Up? (7 page)

“But I'm not kidding,” I said.

Now it was Vivvy who looked confused. She turned toward Pia and Claudia. “Didn't you guys tell her?”

“Actually, we were saving it as a surprise. Remember, Raise? Well, here she is. Ta-da! Presenting: Vivvy. She just started Berkeley Middle School this year, and she's really great. The two of you are so alike. You even look alike. I'm telling you, you're going to love each other,” Pia said.

“My surprise? Oh, great!” I said, trying to be polite.

Suddenly I felt dizzy. Like I could black out. Pia and Claudia and I are a threesome! We don't need anyone else. Unless . . . I'm not enough for them. (Plus if Vivvy was my surprise, did that mean I wasn't getting something smart, splashy, sassy, or sexy?)

I wanted Vivvy to go away. Not only because I wanted Pia and Claudia all to myself, but also because I needed privacy so I could ask them what the heck they were thinking inviting this complete stranger to hang out with us.

My first thought was to call Vivvy and pretend to be her mother telling her to come right home. And I could have totally pulled it off. If only I knew her cell phone number, how to throw my voice, and how to dial a phone without using my hands.

Having a cell phone of my own would have been a big help too.

But since I didn't have the above-mentioned tools, I had no choice but to try and be nice. So I did. Try. But before I could think of how to go about it, Vivvy started in with another question.

“So, Raise, how's CJ?” she asked.

“Wait, what'd you say?” I asked her, sounding a little less nice than I had planned. But it bothered me that she seemed to know so much about me when I hardly knew anything about her.

“She asked you how CJ is,” said Claudia.

“Why don't we go inside?” asked Pia, trying to cut through the tension. “Rae, they have Fluffernutter pie today!” That Pia, such a sensitive and insightful person she is. Always knows exactly the right thing to say to make me feel better.

I hardly recognized the House of Pies when we got inside. Instead of a lot of little tables with mismatched tablecloths, there were now just two very long dining tables that seated about twelve people each.

And the menu was different too. They used to serve things like macaroni and cheese and hamburgers, and now they just served pie. Not that I ever ate the other things. But I always enjoyed knowing they were there.

We sat down and the waitress, who had dreadlocks and wore an orange tunic, handed us our menus. Right away we noticed this guy and girl seated at the other table. They looked old enough to be high school seniors or maybe even college age. The girl was very pretty. And the guy was even prettier. But all they did was whisper-yell at each other.

“I can't tell if those two are a couple or if they just hate each other,” Vivvy said. After which Pia and Claudia started laughing hysterically.

“I don't get it,” I said.

“Really?” Pia asked, in a tone usually reserved for the extremely crazy. “Cuz it's kind of like a joke you would make. Like, about how couples argue so much, sometimes it's hard to tell the difference between people who are boyfriend and girlfriend and people who just kind of . . . y'know . . . hate each other.”

I guess I was just missing something.

“Do you and CJ ever argue?” asked Vivvy as a way to break the silence. “Probably not, right? I mean he's not much of a talker, so how could you really argue?”

Now, how did she know that about him? And was I imagining it, or did she say “not much of a talker” like it was a bad thing?? Even if Pia and Claudia told her about CJ, shouldn't she have felt me out first before diving into my personal life?

I wanted to say something back, but I was so upset, I couldn't think of anything. So I just said, “Not really,” and went back to being quiet again.

It's a good thing my friends and I are so comfortable with the silences. Otherwise I might start to feel like flying all the way to Berkeley to see them was a waste.

About thirty seconds into the silence, the waitress came back to take our orders. “What can I get for you today?” she asked, pulling a dreadlock out of her eyes.

“I'll have the Oreo cookie pie,” said Claudia.

“I'll have the key lime pie,” said Pia.

The waitress took down their order and turned toward Vivvy. That's when I noticed that the same dreadlock the waitress had moved out of her eyes was now standing straight up on top of her head. But she continued to take our orders as if there were nothing unusual about suddenly sprouting an antenna. Comedic moments like that don't come around too often. In the old days the three of us would have taken advantage of this rare opportunity by sharing a round of stifled hysterical laughter once she left. But now, thanks to Vivvy, nothing, not even this gem, seemed funny anymore.

“I'll have a glass of milk and the Fluffernutter pie,” said Vivvy as she smiled at me and winked. I guess she thought it was cute that we even like the same pie.

Then the waitress, whose dreadlock antenna was now drooping over to the left, turned to me. “I'll have a slice of Fluffernutter pie too,” I said.

“I'm sorry,” said the waitress. “I think that was our last slice.” Few harsher words have ever been spoken.

“That's okay, you can have it, Raise. I'm not that hungry anyway,” said Vivvy. But there was no way I'd let her be the hero of the day.

I turned to the waitress. “Just a cup of hot water with lemon, thank you.”

You'd think I had just made some kind of life-or-death announcement. Like that I had decided to swear off television forever. Or cut my bangs again.

“Are you sure, Raisin?” (Claudia)

“Is that really what you want?” (Pia)

“Are you sure?” (What a thief! She stole my best friends and my pie and now Claudia's line too?)

“I'm sure,” I said, handing the menu back to the waitress. Just because they wanted me to order pie and act like everything was okay didn't mean I had to. I refused to play that game. If nothing else, I still had my pride.

At least I did until the orders arrived in all their sweet flufferlimoreo deliciousness. I almost choked on my own drool until Vivvy offered me a bite of her pie and I caved.

Looking back, I wish I hadn't. Because Vivvy took it as a signal that I had forgiven her, and as soon as I finished licking the last bit of marshmallowy splendiferousity off my lips, she asked me another one of her questions.

“Have leggings hit Philadelphia yet? Everyone here's been wearing them, but I think they look like the stores found them in their stockrooms left over from the eighties and were like, ‛Hey, these are really ugly and make most legs look like they belong on overstuffed rag dolls—let's see if we can bring them back!'”

I felt my face turn hot.

“Uh . . . I'm wearing leggings,” I said, my voice cracking.

“These aren't leggings,” she said, pulling at my leggings. “These are footless tights . . . completely different.”

Pia and Claudia both looked really nervous.

“Vivvy knows a lot about fashion,” said Pia.

“It's true,” said Pia. “She used to live in New York.”

I was really trying to keep my cool, but it wasn't easy.

“All I know is that the package said leggings. If I could fly back to Philadelphia to go get it, I would.” And then I mumbled under my breath, “Maybe you guys would like that.”

There was a round of “Aww, Rae's.” And “That's not what she meant's.” And “Don't be upset's.” And Vivvy insisted that she would never have said such a thing if she thought I was in fact wearing leggings. “I mean, it'd be different if I said something bad about something I knew you had. Like ballet flats.” But by that point I had to focus so hard on not bursting into tears, I had no energy left to care. Though I did wonder how she knew I had ballet flats.

“I'm going to take the bus home,” I said as we left the House of Pies.

“Don't you wanna go shopping or something?” Pia asked. “You can't just leave us.”

“I'm kind of tired,” I said, yawning and looking at my wrist. Never mind that I wasn't wearing a watch. “I think I need to sleep for a little while.”

“Well, of course you're tired,” Claudia said, mocking me. “It's already what, seven o'clock at night back in Philadelphia?”

“But I've been up since four in the morning,” I protested.

“Call us later,” Pia said as she leaned over to kiss me goodbye. Then Claudia kissed me goodbye too. And before I knew what hit me, Vivvy was leaning in to give me one as well.

“Take it easy, Rae,” she said.

Take it easy? How could she tell me to take it easy? Take it easy is what you say to someone after they've run down the street naked. Attempted to take flight. Decided to stay in and read a book. Take it easy is what you say to someone who's acting a little crazy. And I was not acting a little crazy

I cried the whole way home. How pathetic is it that I've been waiting for months to see my friends from Berkeley and when I finally do, they've already replaced me with Vivvy. Vivvy, who's not even nice to me and says not-nice things to me about my clothes and my boyfriend. Who my friends stick up for instead of sticking up for me.

Now I wish I never came.

 
6:13 PM, PST

Where are you guys? I keep calling you, but you're not picking up. Things are getting worse by the moment.

I called Pia to talk to her about the Christmas Eve boat ride.

“So, are we on for Blue Christmas?” I asked.

“Huh?” Pia said.

“Blue Christmas? The boat ride tomorrow night? You said you weren't sure because of the surprise, so I'm calling to see what you decided.”

“Well, actually, we're going to Vivvy's dad's Christmas party. See, that's another thing you guys have in common. Both of you have divorced parents. Anyway, you're invited too. She meant to tell you before you left, but . . . she never got the chance.”

I felt a giant tear pop out of my eye the way a BB gun pellet ricochets out of a toy gun. I couldn't believe that she had actually become a part of us.

“I don't think I can make it,” I told Pia. “The boat ride is a tradition, and I wouldn't want to let my dad down. And besides, it'll be nice to spend time just the two of us.”

“Riiiight,” said Pia.

She sounded funny when she said it. Like she knew something I didn't. “Is that okay with you?” I asked.

“Oh yeah,” said Pia. “Don't even worry about it. Before you got here, the three of us already decided that we'd all get together after Christmas dinner to have our own celebration and to exchange presents. So we'll still get to celebrate Christmas with you.”

The three of them decided?! I guess it's a done deal. Whatever we do, Vivvy does too. Regardless of whether she's nice to me or not.

“Do I have to get Vivvy a present?” I asked.

“She got you one,” said Pia.

“She did?” I asked, thinking, of course she did. She had the advantage of Pia and Claudia actually telling her things. “Well, how do I know what to get her?!”

“We were planning on going vintage shopping tomorrow. You can get her something then. I'm telling you, Raise, you guys are just alike! Get her something you'd want.”

Great! I'd want a week without Vivvy hanging around. Can I get her that?

“Fine. I'll give it some thought,” I said. “And may I ask you one more thing about Ms. Vivvy?”

“Uh, sure,” Pia said, sounding a little bit wary.

“How does she get her hair so shiny and glossy?”

“Product,” Pia answered, in a very respectful tone. “Lots of anti-frizz product. The best that money can buy.”

“I see,” I said. And with my head bowed, I bid Pia farewell.

Don't judge me. I'm not two-faced. Sometimes a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to avoid the frizzies.

After I hung up, my father knocked on my door to see how my day went.

“What's new and exciting, Rae? How are my old pals Pia and Claudia?” he asked. I looked like I'd been crying.

“Swami, what's wrong?” He pulled a lock of hair away from my eyes. I told him that I'd invited Pia and Claudia on the boat ride, but they'd already made plans to go to a friend's Christmas party. I didn't mention Vivvy at all. I didn't want him to feel bad for me for being such a loser and coming all the way out here only to find out that my oldest friends already found someone they like better than me.

“Just because they made plans for Christmas Eve doesn't mean they don't still care about you as much as always,” my dad said. “And the truth is,” he added, “We wouldn't have had room for Pia and Claudia anyway.”

“Why not? Now that Pia puts those magnets on her wrist, she never throws up anymore. And Claudia promised us she'd never jump into the dinghy without first asking again.”

“I know. And it's not that I wouldn't love to have them. It's just that there isn't room for them this time because I'm bringing a friend of mine.”

I was a little surprised to hear that my dad was bringing a friend. He never brought a friend before. Then again, he used to bring my mother, who was kind of like a friend to him. And Lola. Though she's nothing like a friend unless he's started hanging out with people who need help reaching the sink and cutting their meat.

“Who? Ravi Singh? Wait! Not Madonna?” I said, getting really excited for a minute.

“Actually, it's my friend Danny.”