Willing Captive (9 page)

Strong. Safe.
Secure.

Those are the words
that flood my mind.

What the
mothertruck?

My heart beats
faster and a flush rises up my neck. I shouldn’t be thinking the
things I’m thinking. Needing to break the spell, I utter, “So I’m
pretty much freaking myself out with images of my impending death
and I was hoping that you’d- I don’t know- you’d reassure me or
some shit.”

Not hesitating for a
second, Nox turns and strides over to the bed, right in front of
me. I crane my head to look up into his face.

Sheer determination.
“You are not going to die.”

I reply breathily,
“What makes you so sure?”

His lip tilts at the corner as he says, “There’s a reason I’m
cocky, princess.” Then he smiles. Not a smirk or a grin. A gleaming
teeth, megawatt smile.

And it’s nice.

Slightly crooked, it
softens his normally hard face. I could get used to this Nox.

He utters, “Don’t
worry, you’ll live to annoy me at least another day.” I almost
swoon when he winks. “I’m the best.”

And then he’s
gone.

***

Nox

My body jolts as I
wake.

Opening my eyes, I
stretch in the rocking chair and something soft falls to the
ground. My brows draw into a frown as I look to the floor.

A blanket?

Not just any
blanket. The blanket from Lily’s bed.

My gaze shoots over
to find her bed empty.

What the hell? Where
is she? More importantly, how did she get out with me blocking the
doorway?

Oh shit.

My blood runs cold
as I shoot up and run down the hall. A million possibilities shoot
through my brain but only one sticks.

Lily going AWOL.

Taking three steps
at a time, I screech to a halt at the bottom of the stairs when I
see Lily and Boo dancing in the kitchen as they cook. They sing
along with the CD player.

“
If you wannabe my lover, you gotta get with my friends!” This
is Lily.

“
Make it last forever, friendship never eeeennddss!” This is
Boo.

They fuse together
with, “If you wannabe my lover, you have got to give. Takin’ is too
easy but that’s the way it is!” Boo takes her spatula and booms
into it, “Slam! Slam! Slam! Slam!”

I’m stunned
speechless. I don’t know whether to laugh or pull up a chair to
catch the rest of the show. Lily looks…happy.

I don’t believe
it.

Her cheeks are
flushed a peachy pink as she sings, laughs, and dances around like
a loon. Wearing a pair of almost too short shorts, a white tank,
and sport socks, she looks like a college girl. Then I remember,
she should be a college girl. She’s twenty-two years old. She’s at
the point in her life where she should be acting irresponsibly,
making stupid choices and being irrational.

A sharp pain pierces
my chest. I quickly quash it. She’s going to have that life. And
I’m going to get it back for her. Mark my words.

Lily yells into a
wooden spoon, “Slam your body down and wind it all around!” Then
she and Boo make circles by their sides with their hands, making
them look like human choo-choo trains.

And I can’t stop it.
Leaning my head back, I roar with laughter.

Lily yelps, placing
a hand on her now heaving chest. Boo remains cool as a cucumber,
still showing off her spaztastic dance moves. Boo turns to Lily and
teases, “Don’t worry, Deedee. He’s just jealous he can’t move like
we can.”

Lily scowls at me,
“You didn’t have to sneak up on us. I almost had a heart attack.”
Waving a hand in front of me, her eyes widen comically as sarcasm
takes over. “Hello? Remember? Impending death and all that?”

Chuckling, I roll my
eyes at her over dramatics. Suddenly remember this morning’s rude
awakening, I crook my finger and her eyes widen. Her feet shuffle
slowly towards me. Once she’s a few feet away, I bend at the waist
until we’re almost nose to nose. I half whisper, “Where were you
this morning?”

Her face softens.
She whispers back, “You were tired. And it was my fault. I thought
I’d let you sleep.”

“
That’s not what I asked.”

Our quiet
conversation has drawn the attention of Boo, who stands over at the
breakfast bar leaning towards us, straining to hear what she can.
When she catches my glare, she makes a ‘pffft’ sound and goes back
to cooking.

By the expression on
Lily’s face, I can see she doesn’t get what the big deal is. I
explain softly, “I’m responsible for you. Not Boo. Not Rock. Me. Me
alone. I get that you weren’t far, but I need to know where you
are. Every second of every day. I know you’re pissed-”

Cutting me off, she
says quietly, “That’s just it. I’m not pissed. Not anymore. You
were right. I’ve moved on. I-” Avoiding my eyes, she admits, “I
want to start fresh, too.”

…
Say what?

Lily avoids my gaze
a few seconds longer before our eyes meet. Her green eyes wide and
doe-like. My gut tells me to watch my back. Closely. Narrowing my
eyes, I assure, “I don’t know what you’re up to, Delilah. But I’m
onto you.”

Shock momentarily
forms on her face; just as quickly, it transforms to anger. She
hisses, “You’re out of your mind! I’m calling a truce here, Nox.
I’m only offering this once, so take it or leave it.”

Against my better
judgment, I take her small, outstretched hand and pump it twice. As
soon as I let go, she smiles, “See? Not so hard, was it?”

Without answering, I
walk over to the breakfast bar, take an apple, and bite into it.
From behind me, I hear, “So I was wondering if I could speak to my
sister?”

Oh boy.

Turning, I make a
show of slowly chewing. Sliding her eyes down to my mouth, her lips
part, she swallows hard and quickly looks away.

What was that?

A dark smirk forms
on my face, “I see. Truce, huh? So you’ll only cooperate if I do
what you want? Nice try, Lily. Not how it works.” Turning my back,
I start to walk away when I’m held back.

Lily grips my hand
tightly, her eyes plead. “No! That’s not what I meant.” Placing a
hand on her chest, she breathes deeply. Swallowing hard, her eyes
flutter and she lets go of my hand, placing it on her chest.

I’ve seen this
before.

Panic attack.

Stepping forward, I take hold of her waist and guide her to a
chair at the dining table. Sitting her down, she wipes the sweat
off her forehead with an unsteady hand and heaves, “Sorry…”
Pant
. “I don’t know what’s…”
Pant
, “happening to me.”

Feeling like an
asshole, I clear my throat and begin, “I think you’re developing
panic attacks.”

Still heaving in
deeply, she squawks, “What? No way!”

“
Yeah. So you need to tell me what’s bothering you so we can
fix it.”

Lily looks up in thought, her breathing slows slightly and she
replies, “My family. Not being able to talk with them. It makes
me…thinky…and…itchy.”

Should’ve seen this
coming.

Opening my mouth to
answer, Lily cuts me off with, “How about if you let me talk to my
dad and sister once a week? You name the day and time and what I
can and can’t talk about.” Hope flares in her Granny-apple-green
eyes. “I’ll listen. I swear. I’ll do whatever you say. Just knowing
I’m not cut off from them helps. I’m feeling better already. Look!”
She pats her forehead and shows me her dry fingers.

Doesn’t matter what
I do, I’m always gonna be the bad guy to Lily. I know it shouldn’t
bother me, but fuck me, it does. Knowing I can’t give her what she
needs to feel safe and happy while she’s in my care…it blows. Okay,
so she’s the first young woman I’ve had to watch, but there’s
something about this girl. I can’t put my finger on it.
She’s…different.

“
Lily, I-” Her face falls and I explain slowly but firmly why
this is complicated. “Listen, there are things you don’t know.” Lip
quivering, her eyes shine bright as I continue. “Firstly, your dad
and mom aren’t on a secure line so we have to keep calls to them
under five minutes. That’s all you get if I allow it. Secondly,
Mitch is keeping Terah somewhere safe. Somewhere like this. There’s
a reason for separating you. I can’t tell you about it right now,
but what I can tell you is that not even I know where she is. I can
talk to Mitch and try to pry a phone number out of him, but I can’t
promise it’s gonna happen.”

“
Who’s Mitch?” she asks quietly.

“
Mitch is the guy who recruited me.”

“
So, he’s your boss.”

Making a face, I
think about how I can put it. Clarifying this may be harder than I
thought. “Sorta. He’s higher up on the food chain, but he doesn’t
call himself our boss. We’re a team. We work together.” She doesn’t
look convinced. “If anyone was looking out for Terah and I wasn’t
available, you’d want Mitch. He won’t let anything happen to
her.”

“
I
thought the threat was targeting me.” She shrugs a little as if she
still doesn’t get it.

Sitting, I lean my
forearms on the table. “Think about it, Lily. Your mom and dad are
dealing with an active threat. Who knows just how serious it is? We
get you out and you’re safe. What happens if the people who want
you can’t find you? What do they do then? They’re serious enough to
mess with one daughter.”

I see the light
switch on inside her head. “They take Terah instead.”

Silence forms a
thick fog around us. I’m not sure what else to say. Truthfully,
I’ve told her too much already. Standing, I tap the frame of the
chair with my fingertips. Our eyes meet, a mutual acknowledgement.
Turning, I walk only a step before I hear her ask, “But you’ll try,
right? Like, really try?”

Walking further away
from her, I turn my head back and promise, “I’ll try, Lily.”

And I mean it.

Chapter Seven
Moving house

Lily

It’s funny how much
I’ve grown accustomed to eating dinner at a dining table with other
people. At home, our schedules are so randomly set that we always
miss each other. Terah at college, Dad and me at the warehouse, Mom
volunteering for some underfunded organization.

I never really
understood what I was missing, until now.

Three days have
passed since I spoke to my dad, and my spirits are revitalized.
Sometimes all you need is a simple sentence to set you
straight.

“
Whatever you do, listen to Nox. He’s only got your best
interests at heart.”

I really hope so,
Dad, because I’m beginning to trust him in a way I don’t trust
anyone else.

Boo and I spend the
afternoon cooking dinner. You’d think this would be a simple task.
The thing is, we cook for twenty. That’s how many people work at
the safe house. And with Boo being the only other woman, that’s how
many giant soldier-commando men we have to feed. They don’t eat
home-cooked meals every night. Most of the time, they settle for
take-out. It’s quicker and easier.

When Boo asked me to
peel some potatoes, I was all ‘Sure thing. Pass ‘em over!’

How hard could it
be?

She handed me a
twenty pound bag of potatoes. Then laughed.

My pruney, wrinkled
hands will smell of starch for a week. Fo shizzle.

The past few days have confirmed my suspicion that Nox has
assigned Boo to watch over me. And it doesn’t bother me. Not in the
slightest. I like Boo. We have weird and wacky conversations. If
we’d met her under different circumstances, we’d be bffs.

“
So, where is Nox anyway?” I ask, stirring the beef and wine
goulash that smells divine.

Boo cocks a brow at
me questioningly. “Why’d you wanna know? I thought you’d be
thrilled to be rid of him.”

I
answer
way
too quickly. “I am!”
Flushing, I try again, forcing myself to slow the hell down and act
nonchalant. I do this little shrug and tip my head, making me look
a little less relaxed and more like a stroke victim
. “I mean, he’s been
okay
the last few days, but he told me I was his responsibility and
I was just wondering what was so important that he had to make you
babysit me.”

Purposely avoiding
the question, she smiles softly, “It’s never babysitting with you,
Dee.” Chuckling, she goes on, “I actually feel bad for having so
much fun with you. It doesn’t even feel like I’m working. I don’t
get to spend time with women a lot and…and I guess I forgot how
much I missed it. Rock’s jealous. He wants to take a shift with you
so he can teach you how to throw a decent punch.”

No way! Cool!

That certainly draws
my attention. Stirring forgotten, I answer enthusiastically, “Would
he really? Oh, man. I’d love that. I always wanted to do a
self-defense course, but my dad-” My bravado fizzles and I fade
out. Regaining a little excitement, I ask quickly, “Do you think
you could teach me stuff, too? Like maybe…” Looking around to make
sure Nox isn’t lurking in a dark corner, I’m convinced enough to
ask, “Like weapons and gun stuff?”

Boo’s eyes widen and she chuckles humorlessly, “Hold up there,
Dee. You don’t need to know any of
that
stuff, hon. I can, however, teach you how to bring a
man to his knees in a second flat. Nothing so permanent,
though.”

Widening my eyes to
match hers, I yell, “Hello?” Thrusting my arms out by my sides, I
whisper shout, “Someone is trying to kill me! The knee thing is all
fine and dandy, but what if something happens and I need to…”
Swallowing hard, I whisper, “What if I need to make sure someone is
gone? Like, forever gone, type-a gone.”