Wilson Mooney, Almost Eighteen (15 page)

“
I’m going to get a couple
runs in. I’ll meet you back here in an hour. Okay?” She looked at
me assuming I understood what a couple of runs, meant. I shook my
head and started over to the area where I was going to let some
person strap boards to my feet and instruct me on how to go down
the side of a mountain without getting hurt.

“
You need to grab your
skis, those ones there.” She pointed to the rack. I grabbed the
blue and white Rossignol skis I assumed were mine and clunked my
way to the lesson area.

By the time I walked twenty feet my
thighs were burning and I could feel the onset of Charley horses in
my calves. I had to stop walking every couple of feet to adjust and
shuffle the skis from one hand to the other. It wasn’t like they
were super heavy, just awkward to hold and carrying them while
trying to walk in the ski boots was a chore. I could only assume
the more practice I had dealing with skis and boots, the better I
would get at handling them. Except I had another ten feet to go
when the skis fell into the snow, they somehow hooked against each
other in a weird cross pattern and I couldn’t get them to go back
together. I was completely confused how to fix them. I looked like
a total rookie.

“
Here, let me help you,
Wilson,” a guy’s voice floated through the air. I heard it before
but it wasn’t familiar. I turned and looked up to see who was
coming to help me, my heart dropped in my gut. It was Wayne Samuel,
John’s son, the man from the airplane ride.

“
Oh my God! Wow, hi Wayne.
Thanks. It’s my first time skiing.”

“
Well don’t worry. I won’t
have you do anything crazy.” He smiled picking up my crossed skis
and fixing them. “I’m your instructor today.” He handed me back the
skis perfectly organized. His eyes smiled matching his
lips.

“
Really?” I nodded my head
and swallowed hard. He was really good looking, crystal clear blue
eyes that you could dive into and naughty blonde hair with just
enough curl to catch your fingers. I could tell I was going to have
a major problem focusing today. Between him and Max, I didn’t know
how I was ever going to learn how to ski.

Chapter
Eleven:

Forty-five minutes, was how long it
took me to understand how to clear my boot of snow and click in and
out of the skis, toe then heel. It was really hard to focus, I
wanted to pay attention, but my thoughts would get all tangled up
in where Max was. It was even harder when Wayne snapped out of his
skis wrapped his hands around my waist and showed me how to bend at
the knees and lean to turn.

“
When you feel me press on
your side I want you to lean that way.” He pressed my left side. I
leaned. He pressed on my waist to the right. Of course I leaned
that way too.

“
That’s good. Now bend more
at your knees.” I guess I didn’t do it the way I was supposed to,
he grabbed my waist and stood right in front of me. His hands slid
across my hips and down to the front of my thighs. He looked me in
the eyes, his hands stayed on my legs.

“
Do you feel the muscles
working? Right through here.” His hands rubbed the outside of my
thighs.

“
Yeah, they burn.”
Wow, how cute is he? He’s grabbing my legs. Focus
Wilson.

“
That’s just how I want you
when we get on the ski lift and go down the beginner
run.”

“
Whoa, wait; ski lift?
We’re not doing that today right? I mean, that’s like the next time
I’m here.” Every feeling of insecurity twisted and knotted in my
stomach.

Who would have thought that barreling
down the side of a mountain would happen forty-five minutes after I
put the skis on my feet?

“
You’ll do just fine. I’m
going to be right there with you. I won’t let anything happen to
you. Trust me?” his voice lowered and he pulled off his
gloves.

“
I don’t know this seems
way too soon. I think—.”

“
Wilson, trust me.” He
grabbed my chin, just like Max did. My head swam, and electricity
surged throughout my body. My heart wanted Max but my endorphins
raged for the guy touching me.

“
I’ll trust you.” The words
hardly made it out of my mouth. My legs trembled with waves of
fear.

“
You’re shaking.” He
grabbed my shoulders. “Don’t be afraid.”

“
I’m cold,” I
lied.

I was so frickin
scared.

“
Well let’s get you moving
then.” He dropped his skis next to me, clipped them on his boots
and grabbed his poles.

We worked our way down to the ski
lift. It actually was only about fifteen feet away from where we
were. We had to wait in a line for beginning skiers. This was the
time instructors were giving their pep talks. At least Wayne kept
me thinking I could do it. Time passed so quickly I didn’t realize
we were up. I watched Wayne signal the operator in the booth. The
guy’s voice echoed across the walkie-talkie he held to his
mouth.

“
High nest, first timer
entering lift. Slowing the lift. Repeat, beginner approaching the
chair; turtle speed.”

He might as well frickin announced it
across the loud speakers in the lodge too. I could feel the blood
flood to my cheeks. There must have been fifty people on the open
air death trap ahead of me and about the same waiting behind in
line. I shuffled out with Wayne holding my arm and the second
operator held my other arm. My skis crossed and the chair caught me
right at mid thighs. Wayne pulled me close to him and held his arm
around me. Adrenaline thrashed and filled every cell of my body. I
didn’t want to fall seventy feet to my death so I held real still
and barely breathed. He was so relaxed.

“
You can open your eyes
now.” Wayne leaned towards me making the chair sway.

“
What are you doing? Don’t
make it move—oh my God.” I tried to breathe shallow. My muscles
burned.

“
It’s okay; you’re not
going to fall. I will make sure of it.” He locked his poles across
my lap. “You’re safe, see? How long are you in Aspen?” he asked
low.

“
Just until Sunday, then we
head back home,” I answered quietly. I didn’t want to make the
chair move.

“
Where’s home?”

“
Northern California, the
bay area. You?” I looked up at him, still shaking inside we were
really high up now.

He smiled. “Wherever there’s
snow.”

“
Well that’s totally vague
and mysterious. So I can assume you lived in Russia?”

“
In 2006; for eight
months.”

“
How long are you living
here?”

“
I’m here until February.”
He adjusted his legs, his skis bounced in the air so chunks of snow
fell to their deaths.

“
Then where are you going?”
I tried not to look down.

“
I haven’t decided yet.” He
looked out.

“
Have you ever lived in
Northern California, Tahoe area? I hear some of the best skiing is
up there— that’s just what I’ve heard.” I followed his eyes to
where he was looking.

“
Never lived there. Always
thought about it, just haven’t made it yet. Now listen, when we
come up to the top, you’ll want to hold your skis up so they catch
the hill. As the chair swings around you will need to slide off.”
He held his skis up causing the chair to move again. I truly didn’t
know I was that afraid of heights before I was on this ski
lift.

“
Are they going to slow it
down, because right now I feel like we are flying super fast?” My
hands hurt from clenching the metal arm of the chair.

“
Yeah, they will. I will
follow right behind you.” He pulled his poles off my lap and pulled
his sunglasses across his eyes. He nodded to the guy in the booth
running the top end. So of course, the chair lift slowed to a crawl
and I heard the guy tell the lower operator about the same slow
turtle; newbie skier coming off now. I inched my back away from the
chair and sat on the edge. I felt the chair drop lower and I was
pizza plowing down the embankment. I felt Wayne behind me, his skis
slid up between my feet and his hands caught my waist, I slid
forward towards the beginner trail.

“
Not too bad, Wilson. I’ll
go down first I want you to follow my motions. Remember, make sure
you plow, keeping the tips of your skis together in a V shape. Stay
parallel with the mountain.” He pointed to my sunglasses on the top
of my head. I pulled them down and tried to get my heart to stop
thumping so hard.

I can do this.
I chanted to myself over and over in my head
until I had a tiny spark of confidence in my body.
Wait a minute. This hill didn’t look that steep
from the chair. Stop being a baby, I can do this.
I watched him ski down the hill far enough away
to give me the space to either succeed at getting down to him or
completely kill myself trying.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw a
beautiful woman skiing across behind me to someone waiting for her.
I heard her tell him to wait. Not usually a big deal in the scheme
of people skiing up and down hills, however; it was the words she
yelled that caused me to look. I almost fell over.

“
Max, you better wait for
me!” She skied over snapped her skis off and clomped over to hug
him. She wrapped around him and he locked his arms around her. I
couldn’t tell if she kissed him, I couldn’t see his face through
her thick curly brown hair. He had a beanie that covered his head
and sunglasses that hid his expression. That couldn’t be my Max. I
twisted to see what was happening between them. He lowered her to
the ground she grabbed his beanie off, messed up his hair and
stepped back. He smiled and pulled off his sunglasses, my heart
shattered. Chills radiated from inside out. It was my Max. He was
staring at her.

Who was that girl? She was
unbelievably perfect. Something I wasn’t. Her smile, her hair, she
looked worldly and very comfortable with him, might as well crush
me into a billion pieces. Broken wishes and jagged dreams, cargo I
thought only needy girls owned. I wasn’t supposed to be one of
them. I wasn’t one of them. I always considered myself independent,
personable and emotionally strong before this weekend. I glanced
back and saw she was laughing and pushing her fingers to move his
hair out of his eyes. She was touching him and he looked like he
was right at home. I guess I was wrong. I was a self conscious,
emotionally broke and disenchanted needy girl.

“
What’s the hold up? You
can do this. Don’t think about it,” Wayne yelled up to
me.

I turned back to face down the
mountain. He was hard to see through the tears that stung so cold
in my eyes. My cheeks wet, freezing with icy lines of complete
devastation, I held my breath and leaned forward. I needed to get
away from them. I didn’t need to see anymore, I was tortured
enough.

I felt my balance teeter too far in
front of me. My knees stretched, my calves pulled and my stomach
coiled. I was heading straight to Wayne full force. I couldn’t get
my skis to pitch into a V and I was going too fast to stop. I
couldn’t see through my tear heavy lashes that clogged my vision.
Fear and exhilaration spun out of control through my body. Was it
because I was skiing down the hill or because this heartbreak was
the worst ever? I couldn’t answer; I just felt my body somersault
forward, white and blue swirled around me, sun then snow, sky then
pain. I swore I heard my name being screamed like a parent trying
to stop a child from running across a busy street.

When my body stopped tumbling and
sliding I heard the snow cut across like paper when it’s ripped
into long strips. Wayne snapped off his skis and hopped down to
me.

“
Wilson, are you okay?
Answer me.” He bent down to me pulling off his gloves to clear the
snow drenched hair from my face.

“
I’m okay. I’m sorry. Maybe
I’m not cut out to be a skier.” My pride was bruised and my heart
was wounded. My body was fine; it was my soul, which hurt all
over.

“
Wow that was quite a
tumble you took.” His thumb pulled down on my lower lid, he stared
into my eyes. “Can you feel your feet? Move your fingers?” He
pulled off my gloves. I moved my fingers.

“
Can you feel that?” He
stroked my fingertips.

“
Yeah I’m fine. I just want
to sit up.” I raised my head from the snow.

“
Wait. Let me help you.” He
adjusted my head and I felt his hands slid under my neck. He
pressed his fingertips into my spine. “Does that hurt?”

“
No, I really am fine. Just
feel a little stupid,” I told him as I tried to sit up.

He slid under my back and pulled me
against his chest.

“
Just sit here a minute.
Give yourself a moment before you try and stand up.” I felt his
hands slide up the sides of my neck. I could feel his heart beat
against my back. I rested against him. He was so comforting like a
down blanket that warmed me on a blustery day. I closed my eyes and
tried to stop the ache from consuming the rest of my body. Wrong
solution, all I could see was Max and that girl together. How she
was touching him, and how he was smiling at her. His hands held her
tight against his body.
NO, I can’t take
this.
I opened my eyes to stop the
visions. Stop the swell of devastation trying to take over every
part of my body. Wayne’s arm wrapped across my chest, his hands
pulled my hair away from my left temple and he pressed
hard.