Winged: A Novella (Of Two Girls) (13 page)

Meanwhile, a stray dragonfly, gossamer wings
opalescent under the moonlight, rested unnoticed on one of the
wooden pillars.

Prologue: Curbing The Flame

The abbess lifted her horn-rimmed glasses
and gazed thoughtfully at the young woman standing before her
simple desk. She glanced at the letter in her hand, read it
carefully and looked at the slim figure standing uncomfortably in
front of her. With a sigh, she spoke:

“So, your mother, Her Imperial Majesty, has
sent you here to control your
nei huo
.”

“Yes, madam,” the young woman replied
politely, watching the old woman clad in a simple white
pao
.
The abbess’s sanctum was a sparsely furnished room with a desk, two
shelves of books and a basin of water for hand washing. Beyond the
large window, the young woman could see lush greenery and the
occasional sparkle of water – a waterfall cascaded down a steep
cliff, pooling noisily into a clear lake. She had taken note of it
as she was heading up the mountain.

“In the letter, your mother has instructed
me to either curb or reduce your
nei huo
, your phoenix
flame. Because it has apparently caused problems.” The abbess
continued. Her white hair glittered in the late-morning light. Her
voice was parchment-paper dry.

The young woman winced and nodded assent.
She
had
caused problems. Her temper was out of control,
scaring her sisters. Her youngest brother bore the brunt of her
fire and the poor boy had run crying to their mother, the Empress,
who was then busy holding court and had to deal with a wailing
little prince-ling of the Phoenix Court.

Her phoenix flame was roaring loudly,
probably made worse by the onset of puberty. She cringed and felt
terrible inside. The phoenix flame, the ability to turn woman to
phoenix, jumped generations. She experienced a rush of annoyance:
Why me?
The rest of her sisters carried the recessive
gene.

The abbess chuckled suddenly. “I trained
your mother personally, Your Highness. She was sent by her mother,
your grandmother the Dowager. For similar reasons.” She got up
gracefully from her chair, a smallish woman but her aura spoke of
subtle power. “Enough of idle chit-chat. You will be sent to your
room. Training begins at dawn.”

***

“Look at me,” the young girl laughed
gleefully and let the phoenix flame out, filling her entire being
with an actinic fire. Her arms turned into wings of white-hot light
and the entire courtyard flared up with the sudden illumination.
The immaculately trimmed flowering shrubs flickered as if they
caught fire.

“Your Highness,” her nanny shielded her eyes
and spoke soothingly. “You might end up hurting someone.”

At those solemn words, the young girl pulled
back the flame and the light went out, as if extinguished. She was
only seven then, having newly discovered her ability. Phoenix
flame. It was glorious. It was like soaring up into the sky and
dancing on the clouds.

***

Training indeed began at dawn. The young
woman was woken up by a resonant bell-tone and she sat up,
startled, on her stiff rattan bed. It was still cold and dark.
Around her, she could hear the entire nunnery stirring. There were
footsteps hurrying down outside her room and female voices raised
in genteel chatter. It was a strange environment, so different from
the opulence of the Phoenix Court, that she was hit by a sudden
burst of homesickness. As she placed her bare feet on the floor,
she shuddered involuntarily, because it felt like a winter’s
day.

Reluctantly, she joined the other acolytes
in their morning ablutions, bathing in the ice-cold water and
wearing the plain white shift that chafed her skin to no end.
Breakfast was hot mountain rice and plain bean curd cubes.
Hardly filling
, she thought irritated but pretended to eat
with gusto when the abbess walked past her.

The acolytes were put through a series of
calisthenics, complex moves which made the young woman perspire and
wobble in her steps. The worst came when they were instructed to
stand in a particular stance: hands steepled as if in prayer and
standing on one foot. The other women made it look so easy.

She cursed inwardly and felt her phoenix
flame come to life. Her entire form flickered with an unseen heat
wave and the senior acolyte, overseeing the exercise, quite simply
threw ice water onto the princess. The shock of the cold liquid
snapped her out of the imminent flare-up; the water dripped down
her shift, her hair was all wet. She was never that embarrassed in
her life.

By the end of the day, the young woman was
sufficiently humiliated and she withdraw into herself, wishing that
she was back at the Court, in her comfortable chambers and eating
delicious food. The dreams at night were of flying and burning
bright as the afternoon sun.

***

“What is the purpose of the
nei huo
?”
The young girl asked her mother one evening, when the Imperial
family retreated to the cool gardens to admire the fragrant flowers
and to escape the summer heat.

Her mother, Empress Ze Tian, regarded her
with kohled eyes and a soft smile. “The purpose is to instruct us.
That we, of the phoenix blood, are true to ourselves. Not many of
us could possess and control such power within.”

The young girl considered the reply quietly.
She had seen her mother transform into a orange-sun phoenix, fiery
red wings which licked the air like live fire and turned everything
to pure heat. It was during a conference, with the delegations from
the other Alliance Planets. She remembered that there was a fair
bit of bickering and nothing seemed to be moving. The negotiations
were stuck while the delegates postured and quarreled among
themselves. Her mother had grown frustrated and her shift to
phoenix was a wake-up call to the Alliance Planets to focus on the
real matter at hand.

***

As she grew older and bigger, so did her
phoenix flame. It burned inside her like a furnace, causing her to
sleep naked at times or bathe in cisterns filled with cold water.
Her temper also grew, to the consternation of her mother.

“My dear princess Min Feng,” Empress Ze Tian
beckoned to her adolescent daughter after a particularly bad temper
tantrum, consisting of broken vases and pottery. “You need to learn
how to curb your flame. A phoenix in mindless rage is an useless
phoenix.”

“Your Majesty,” the Empress’s Chamberlain
interjected in worriedly. “We cannot continue dousing her with cold
water.”

Empress Ze Tian eyed her daughter intently.
She was growing tall and slender, beautiful even. Her black hair
was streaked with burnished gold, a sure sign that she was
over-using her phoenix flame. She stood sullenly, ready for another
reprimand.

“One day, Min Feng,” the Empress’s use of
her intimate name surprised the girl and she immediately
straightened, standing at attention. “You have to realize that your
phoenix flame is a gift, passed down from mother to daughter. Use
it not in moments of anger.” The Empress did another surprising
thing: she kissed her daughter’s forehead affectionately.

***

The training continued, day by day. The food
remained the same – cold and bland. She was getting very tired with
the cold-water treatment. Resentment set in like a sore tooth. She
bristled, restless in mood and obnoxious in attitude.

“I refuse to accept this any further!” She
declared hotly, halfway through a meditation session aimed to
silence the static in the mind. She stormed out of the class,
leaving the rest of the acolytes gaping at her.

She stalked out of the nunnery, feeling heat
rise from her skin like a shimmering wave. She craved action. She
craved flying. She wanted to get out of this wretched place. With a
cry of release, she spread her arms and called forth the phoenix
flame –

-- And she flared up, like a nebula,
pulsating and glowing with immense power. She gave voice and it was
a phoenix’s cry, high and undulating. The heat burned bright,
relentless. She gloried in it, dancing in and with the fire. She
moved her wings and they crackled like electricity. Unleashed, all
her frustration and anxiety poured out, making the flames roar even
louder, more violent, drowning out the voices around her.

There were people shouting at her to stop.
Frantic voices were screaming
.

“Cease!”

This voice had the force of a blizzard and
it hit her hard, fire against ice. She screamed, losing
control.

“Cease!”

The blizzard voice again. And this time, it
had the effect of an ice wall, smacking the young phoenix-woman
dead center. She fell from the sky and hit the ground.

Later, as she swam in and out of fevered
consciousness, she glimpsed the abbess’s stern face.

Then a shroud of cold wrapped around her and
she descended into oblivion.

***

She awoke, suspended in clear water.

Falling water thundered about her and she
realized, with a gasp, that she was tied and kept afloat in the
pool. The water was frigid, fed straight from the mountains. She
shivered – they had stripped her of her clothing. Instinctively,
she reached for her phoenix flame, only to find that it had been
reduced to an ember. She recoiled in instant fear and shock,
sobbing.

“You almost burned the nunnery down, your
Highness.”

The abbess sat on a rattan chair on the edge
of the pool. Her expression was inscrutable, but Min Feng could
feel her anger. A glacial anger, firmly controlled at the
moment.

“I am… sorry,” the young woman said
sincerely and she remembered so many “sorries”, so many apologies.
Contrition merged with regret.

“Apologies are not enough,” the abbess said,
shaking her head slowly, ruefully. “When the damage has already
been wrought.”

The young woman felt tears emerge from her
eyes, streaming down her wet face. The water was frigid, numbing
her bones. She wanted so much to get out of the water and dry
herself. Warm herself and wear clothes. And she was ashamed.

“What can I do?” She whispered faintly and
the abbess heard her.

“Curb your flame. Learn how to control it.”
The old woman replied and lifted the young woman out of the water
with her
chi
. She covered the shivering girl in a thick
towel and led her away from the Crystal Pool tenderly.

“Now your actual training will begin.”

***

As they walked away from the Crystal Pool,
Min Feng could see the ugly black burn marks on the ground, the
wilted trees with charred branches and melted statues with drooping
features. She closed her eyes and let her tears fall unchecked. She
would have killed someone with her phoenix flame. No.
Temper
tantrum
. She could not restrain her
nei huo
. She
remembered broken shards, scattered on a marbled floor.

It was an awful revelation. It rocked her
instantly to her core.

***

The abbess started her on basic meditation.
Focusing on her
nei huo
, her inner flame. She was taught how
to visualize placing boundaries around the fire, banking it and
still maintaining its heat. She could see the embers within her,
glowing a bright pink. Under the guidance of the abbess, she began
to cultivate it, calm it and control it.