Words Get In the Way (14 page)

Callie shook her head. “I don’t know. This is crazy. I can’t keep asking you to take care of him.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not right.”

“Cal, it’s sort of an emergency, don’t you think?”

She nodded but then shook her head too. “Oh, I just don’t know what to do!”

“Then don’t even think about it. Is eight too early?”

“Eight is fine.” She sighed. “I don’t know how I can ever repay you.”

Linden grinned. “Spaghetti again would be good. I think there’s still plenty.” Callie laughed, and Linden smiled. “Hey, at least you’re laughing.” He looked in Henry’s direction. “Bye, Henry.” Then he looked at Callie. “Good night,” he said with a gentle smile.

“Good night,” she replied. “Thank you again.”

She watched him pull away and then walked over to where Henry was working. Even in the dark, she could see that he was still methodically pulling grass and weeds from the soft earth. “Henry,
you
are doing a really good job,” she said softly.

29

C
allie had trouble falling asleep that night. By the time Henry was washed up and in bed, she was exhausted, but worried thoughts about her dad still plagued her mind. Finally, she got up, wandered to the kitchen, opened the fridge, and stared absentmindedly at its contents. The cool air drifted out, and she could hear her dad’s voice: “Callie, please don’t stand there with the door open. It’s not an air conditioner.” She smiled, took out the milk, and poured a small glass. Then she turned on the stove light and saw the new batteries on the counter next to the remote control. She pried out the old ones, popped in the new ones, and went into the living room to see if it worked. The TV came right on.
Finally, something that works!

She was about to turn it off again when she realized that
The Tonight Show
was starting. She sat down on the edge of her dad’s favorite chair and watched Jay Leno greeting his audience, and remembered how her parents had always stayed up late to watch Johnny Carson. When she was little, she’d sometimes lain awake, listening to the big band sound of “Johnny’s Theme” before drifting off to the comforting sound of her parents’ laughter. The memory made her smile. After Jay had taken over, her parents hadn’t stayed up as often and, after her mom’s accident, her dad hadn’t stayed up at all, but Callie still liked to watch it once in a while. When she was away at school, she’d often turned it on to get a break from her homework. She sank back into her dad’s comfortable old chair and listened to Jay’s monologue. Moments later, she was sound asleep.

The next morning, she woke with a start and realized that
The Tonight Show
had somehow become the
Today
show and her glass of milk was still sitting on the table. She sat up, glanced at the clock, groaned, dumped the milk down the drain, peeked in on Henry, and hopped in the shower. Linden would be there any minute!

She was towel-drying her hair and sifting through a pile of folded laundry, looking for something to wear, when she heard a knock on the door. She groaned again, wrapped the towel around her, and hurried to answer it. Linden was standing outside in the early morning sun.

“Hey!” she said, obviously frazzled. She unhooked the door, pushed it open, and saw that he was holding two cups of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee and a box of Munchkins. “Oh, my goodness!
You
are a lifesaver! We are running late. I overslept, and Henry’s not even up yet!”

“It’s okay, it’s not like I have to punch a clock. I can get there anytime or not at all. You are the one that needs to get going.”

“I know... .” Callie relaxed for one second and smiled. “But I need to get dressed first.”

“I see that,” he said with a grin. “Need help?” Callie gave him a funny look, and he laughed. “Just kidding! Go.”

A few minutes later, a dressed Callie ushered a cranky Henry across the hall to use the bathroom. When he started to protest, she whispered, “Linden’s here and he brought a treat.” This bit of news brought immediate cooperation, and Callie just shook her head. “I don’t know why you don’t act this way for me.”

Moments later, Henry appeared shyly in the kitchen doorway and Linden looked up from the book Callie had left on the table. His hair was damp and neatly combed, and he was wearing green shorts and a John Deere T-shirt.

“Here’s my little helper,” Linden said with a smile.

“I’m coming,” Callie hollered from the bathroom. She took one last look in the mirror and sighed. It was the best she could do.

She joined them in the kitchen wearing white shorts and a light blue sleeveless T-shirt. Linden looked at her outfit. “Hmmm, I liked the towel better.”

She rolled her eyes and shook her head at the same time.

“You’re pretty good at that,” he teased.

She grinned. “Would you like to see it again?”

“Sure.”

“Well, you’ll have to wait.”

Linden handed one of the coffees to her, and Callie took it, breathed in its fresh aroma, and sighed, “Thank you.” She took a sip and nodded to Henry, and Linden looked over and realized he was gazing longingly at the pink and orange box on the table.

“Do you like Munchkins?” Linden asked. Henry nodded shyly, and Linden said, “Well, you can help yourself.” Henry just stood there, and Linden shook his head. “I’m sorry, Henry. What I mean is: ‘Come over and pick out the ones you like.’ ” He held the box out, and Henry peered inside and carefully took out one chocolate and one coconut. “You’re a man after my own heart,” he said, but as soon as he said it, he knew it probably didn’t make any sense to Henry either. He looked back at Callie. “Do you have to be careful how you word things?”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“Well, I’ve noticed Henry seems to take everything literally. Last night, I said Kat and Springer were probably hungry, and he looked around the kitchen to see if they were here.” At these words, Henry glanced around the kitchen again, and Linden shook his head. “Henry, Kat and Springer are
not
here.” He looked back at Callie. “Did you notice, a moment ago, when I said he could help himself to Munchkins, he didn’t move, but when I said he could pick out the ones he likes, he came right over?” Linden looked at Henry. “If you think about it, Cal, the phrase ‘you can help yourself’
is
sort of abstract.”

Callie nodded. “I guess I never really paid attention.”

Linden smiled. “Well, how do you
pay
attention? Do you give him a check?”

“I see what you mean. It’s as if he only understands exact meaning.”

“It’s just an observation,” Linden said. He nodded toward the book. “This book looks interesting. Is that what Henry has? Autism?”

“The doctor seems to think so, but I haven’t had a chance to find out very much about it. I only have the brochures she gave me, and Dr. Franklin gave that book to me last night.” She glanced at the clock on the stove. “I should go.”

Linden nodded and stood up. “Yup, we’re going too.” He looked at Henry and held out the box of Munchkins. “Can you carry these?” Henry took the box, and Callie picked up the book, slipped it into her bag, and slung the bag over her shoulder. Then she balanced her cup of coffee in her other hand and started to push open the door, but stopped. “I forgot to make a lunch for Henry!”

“Don’t worry, I have plenty.”

“Are you sure? Do you want to take some muffins?”

Linden shook his head. “No, but you should. I’m sure you haven’t eaten anything.”

“I’m fine,” she replied. “I have coffee. That’s all I need.”

“Okay, well, make sure you tell your dad I’m praying for him.”

Callie smiled. “I will.” But then she stopped again. “You need the car seat.”

They went outside and Linden lifted the car seat into the truck, and Callie showed him how to secure it. “You are definitely getting a crash course in parenting,” she said as Linden helped Henry climb in. “I’ll pick him up as soon as I can.” She studied Linden’s face. “I hope everything goes okay, and I hope he’s no trouble.” She kissed Henry’s cheek and whispered, “Be good.” Henry was contentedly munching another Munchkin, though, and swinging his feet at the same time, so she couldn’t tell if he nodded.

As she walked to her car, she looked back. “Don’t forget that he takes off.”

“I won’t forget.”

Callie waved and, as she drove away, prayed they’d be okay.

Twenty minutes later she was hurrying down the hospital corridor, feeling as if she lived there. She stopped in front of the nurses’ station. Jess looked up and smiled. “They just wheeled your daddy into surgery. Dr. Franklin is the best. Everything’s going to be just fine.”

Callie’s heart sank. “Is it too late to see him?”

Jess nodded. “I’m afraid so, honey. But he’ll be done in a couple of hours, although he might not be awake that soon.”

Callie felt like kicking herself.
How can I be late today, of all days? How did I miss letting him know I was there? Why am I always such a screwup?
Tears filled her eyes as she went to find a quiet place to wait.
Oh, Dad, I’m so sorry I missed you. Please know I’m here... .

30

A
s the morning passed, Linden worked steadily. Henry watched him and then began a project of his own. Linden looked over to see what he was up to and realized he was building a miniature wall. He shook his head, amazed that this quiet little boy was able to contentedly entertain himself with a pastime most kids would find boring. He walked over to take a closer look. “Hey, that looks great.”

Henry nodded and continued to pile the small stones.

“Hellooo!” a friendly voice called. Linden turned and saw Fairbanks coming up the hill.

“Good morning!”

“Good morning to you! It’s going to be another hot one.” Henry glanced up and then shyly looked away. Fairbanks smiled. “Who’s this little fellow?”

“This is Henry,” Linden replied. “Henry, this is Mr. Thompson.”

“Nice to meet you, Henry. Please, though, call me Fairbanks. Everyone does.” Henry glanced sideways and then quickly looked away again, and Fairbanks gave Linden a puzzled look.

“You’ll have to excuse Henry,” he said. “He’s a man of few ... actually
no
words.”

Fairbanks leaned against the wall, took off his glasses, wiped his brow with a handkerchief that he pulled from his back pocket, and crossed his arms. “I was once a man of few words.” He paused thoughtfully. “No words at all?”

Linden shook his head. “He nods sometimes, but mostly he likes to give his mom a hard time, tantrums and such.”

Fairbanks nodded thoughtfully. “Maybe that’s his only way of communicating. I struggled with the same thing when I was a youngster. I wasn’t able to vocalize the way I was feeling. It was very frustrating for me
and
my parents. In fact, it’s only by the grace of God and my mother’s love and patience that I didn’t end up in an institution. That’s what people did with kids with autism back then. Regular folks just couldn’t understand our world. Most still don’t.”

“
You
had autism?” Linden sounded incredulous.

Fairbanks glanced sideways and smiled mischievously. “I still do.”

“But you’ve had so much success. I never would have guessed ...”

Fairbanks wiped his glasses on his shirt. “I wasn’t always ‘a success,’ as you call it. I struggled tremendously. We all do.” He watched Henry working intently. “I bet Henry’s mom will eventually discover that he’s good at a great many things. She just needs to be patient and help him figure out what they are.” He knelt down next to Henry and gently touched his arm. Henry looked up and Fairbanks smiled. “
That
is a very nice stone wall, Henry.” Henry nodded and continued to work, his brow furrowed in concentration.

Fairbanks looked back at Linden. “Do sounds bother him?”

Linden shook his head. “I don’t know.”

“Children with autism are usually very sensitive to light and sound. Stop at the house on your way home. I may have something that will help.” With that, he stood. “Well, I’m off for a hike. Hopefully it will get the creative juices flowing!” He looked back and waved and Henry, who was watching him go, made a slight gesture with his hand. Linden raised his eyebrows in surprise.

After Fairbanks had gone, Linden lifted his cooler out of the truck and looked over at Henry. “Ready for lunch?” Henry got up and trundled over to see what
was
for lunch, and Linden took out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, unwrapped it, and handed him half. Henry took a big bite and sat down on the grass, but when Linden found a seat on a nearby rock, Henry got up and sat down near him. Linden leaned forward with his elbows on his knees while he ate and looked out across the pasture. Henry watched him out of the corner of his eye and then leaned forward too, resting his tan arms on his small round knees. Linden smiled, unwrapped another sandwich, and held out another half. Henry stood up, took it, and sat back down.

Late in the afternoon, Linden pulled up in front of the old white farmhouse and Fairbanks came to the door wearing a green headset over his ears. “My father was a pilot!” he explained loudly. “When I was little, he figured out that I didn’t like noise, so one day, he brought these home.” Fairbanks reached up and touched where the wires had been cut off and continued loudly, “I wore them when we went to restaurants.” He smiled. “Everyone gave us funny looks, but my parents didn’t care.” He took the headset off and continued to explain in the same loud voice but then realized he was speaking too loudly. In a softer voice he continued, “My parents were just happy because I was better able to tolerate outings and they enjoyed going out to dinner.” He looked at Henry. “If noise bothers him, they might prove helpful. You can have them. I haven’t used them in years.”

“Thanks,” Linden said. “I’ll pass them along to his mom.”

“I forgot all about them until I started writing this memoir. I’ve been thinking back, trying to explain how I, as a boy, perceived the world and how I learned to live in it.”