Authors: H.P. Landry
“I understand.” What would I do to have my father, even if he were nothing more than the shell of the man I once knew?
“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for you to get upset,” he said, his face full of regret.
“Don’t you worry about me anymore than you already have. I’m fine. I was just thinking that I’d do anything to have my father, even if my father were like yours.” Tears began to pool in my eyes, and my voice started to crack. “They never stop being our fathers even when they prove they are not invincible like we believed them to be.”
“You’re right.” He cupped my face and stared into my eyes, wiping my tears away. “Do you know how amazing you are? You never cease to amaze me.”
“Oh hush… I am just like any other girl.” I playfully shoved his chest, but he held my hand against his beating heart. I watched as he swallowed, his clear eyes hypnotizing me.
“You aren’t like anyone I’ve ever known, and I know how lucky I am that you’re giving us a chance. Truth is, I’ve known what I’ve wanted for a long time. There was always a blank face for the person who was by my side, but it finally has one. It’s you.”
Oh. My. God. What do I even say to that?
“Um--, I,” I started to say. He gazed deeply into my eyes, and gave me a heart-dropping smile while he gently slid the pad of his thumb over my burning cheeks.
Lord I think he is going to kiss me.
“How is possible you look even more beautiful when you blush?” he whispered, lost in the moment, his lips just a few inches from mine.
He was absolutely perfect, but my heart wouldn’t allow me to fully appreciate him.
I’m a horrible person.
A knock on the door interrupted the moment when a busty blonde stuck her head in the room.
“Knock, Knock,” she said in a singsong voice. “Hope I didn’t interrupt anything cher.”
Yes, and thank God you did.
“Of course you didn’t. Come in,” I answered, trying to keep my voice level.
Rhonda gave me a knowing look. The slight frown let me know she was aware something was up. Her eyes focused on our clasped hands. Her eyebrows shot so high, I thought they might touch her hairline.
“It’s so nice to see you again, Rhonda,” Xavier said warmly.
“Likewise. How have you been? Why haven’t seen you at the hospital before now?” Leave it to Rhonda to get right to the point.
“Rhonda,” I warned. She paid me no mind and kept her focus on Xavier, who was pulling at the collar of his shirt as if he was uncomfortable being scrutinized so closely. “Don’t mind her Xavier, she tends to forget her word filter occasionally.”
“No, I am simply speaking the truth. He wasn’t the one who was--”
“Enough, Rhonda. I appreciate your concern, but truly, Xavier had his reasons why he couldn’t be here sooner. Which we’ve already discussed.” She huffed and crossed her arms over her large chest.
“I have a deposition that I need to prepare for, so I’ll give you ladies some private time. I’ll see you later.” He kissed me sweetly on my lips and gave Rhonda a nervous wave before he left.
“What was that?” I immediately asked her as soon as he was gone.
"I don't like that guy. He's bad news. I'm gonna ask my sister, Patsy, to put the gris-gris on him!"
“Will you stop? Xavier has been nothing but kind and sweet,” I said as I waved off the ridiculous notion.
“Damien has been here night and day, keeping a vigil at your bedside. I’m surprised he isn’t here. Wait, did you kick him out?” she accused.
“Of course not, but I dunno--,” I shook my head at his abrupt departure. He was going to tell me something, and Xavier had interrupted.
“It was Fabio, right?” She sulked and pouted, a clear indication that she was not happy.
“Damien made it clear, he doesn’t want me,” I paused because it hurt to admit the truth. “He’ll never fall in love, so why waste my time on someone I can’t have?”
Or my heart…
“You both may not want to admit it, but it’s too late. You already love him, and he loves you. You both just haven’t admitted it yet.”
Damien
“Why are you even wasting your time being here?” I heard someone say.
I looked over my shoulder and saw Malory. This was not a confrontation I was prepared for.
“Excuse me?” I quirked my brow and glared at her.
“I’ll never let it happen. You’re just like the rest of them. You have your money and use people. You’ll never care about anyone’s feelings, so stop pretending that you care and leave her alone,” Malory further elaborated.
“You don’t know me,” I protested. How dare she judge me! I wasn’t the one tied to the bedposts.
“Let me make it very clear, if you don’t leave Mylie alone, I’ll tell her your dirty little secret.”
Malory stalked away down the hall, the sound of her clicking heels slowly fading away. I felt deflated. That’s it. There was no chance for us because Malory would make sure to tell Mylie what I’d done.
“Don’t give up just because you have some skeletons in the closet. We all do, especially that one,” Mrs. J.J. Pierson pointed toward the hall. “You have to follow your heart, or someone may very well steal it right before your eyes.”
She lifted her chin, and I turned to see Xavier walk by staring at his phone, not noticing us at all. He walked toward the exit, and I said a quick goodbye to Mrs. Pierson, following him. I stayed hidden as I listened to the conversation he was having.
“I told you, I had to do something-- I’ll be there soon. Yeah, I’ll see you there, make sure to--, yeah that’s the one.”
He laughed as he hung up the phone, walking briskly away from hospital. I went after him but lost him in the parking garage.
Fuck!
I had to tell Mylie, but what did I really have on him besides the fact that he was meeting with someone? No, I needed evidence, but something in my gut told me that the guy was bad news. I couldn’t help the situation because in the end it was my fault for thrusting Mylie into his arms. I pushed her buttons in an attempt to get a rise out of her, and all it had done was send her sailing straight into this path. If anyone was to blame it was I, but I had to fix it– I had to make it right. “My, my, now that was an interesting phone call.” I would know that Cajun accent anywhere, but I didn’t turn around. “Relax cowboy, I am on your side. That prick needs to go.” I turned to see Rhonda with a menacing glare, looking toward the parking lot.
“I agree, but don’t do me any favors Rhonda. She deserves better than me.”
Her piercing blue eyes turned towards me, and I felt like she was looking through my wall. Her tilted head clearly indicated that she wasn’t buying it. I sighed.
“Don’t explain. You do what you need to do Damien, but, just remember what happened when you pushed her into his arms thinking it was best for her. Now look at the results of that decision. Don’t go and make another mistake that you’ll regret.”
She gave me a tight smile and returned to the hospital. She was right, and I hated to admit it. I had pushed Mylie to be with Xavier, and now there was a chance he was an actual douche. I felt guilt of epic proportions settle on my shoulders, but mostly I felt regret and a twinge of sadness. I would never be the man to make Mylie smile, to push her to achieve her goals, and to help her when she was sad, but more importantly, I wouldn’t be the man that she deserved, the one she had been waiting for.
I knew in my mind that I needed to let her go, but my listless heart that had been numbed with Novocain had started to beat because of Mylie. I didn’t think I could ever forgive her for that because my heart would go on beating, but she would never know it was because of her.
Chapter Fourteen
Mylie
“Rhonda, you don’t know what you’re talking about. Damien is bad news.” Mal insisted, but it really irritated me how she would judge him so quickly.
Sure, I call him Asshole, but he was my asshole, and it was okay for me to call him that. They had been here for hours. The sun had already set a couple of hours ago, but the bickering had had been going on for far too long, and I had grown tired of it.
“Come off it already Mal. Xavier’s a douche, and I don’t trust him. How are you so damn sure about Damien anyway, hmm?” Rhonda retorted with her lips pursed, her hands on her hips while she tapped her foot.
“Really, Rhonda? How about you tell me what Damien ate for dinner? Your nose is so far up his ass; you’d think it was attached! The guy is an asshole! You already know that’s how Mylie feels,” Mal said with more than a trace of anger and bitterness in her tone.
Their constant jabs about Damien and Xavier throughout the day had only served to make me crazy. I was fed up, and I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Enough!” I yelled throwing up my hands. “Y’all are here fighting about my love life, and for what? Damien walked away. Again! I chose Xavier. There isn’t even a discussion to have anymore. I’m tired, so if y’all would excuse me.” I turned over on my side and closed my eyes.
I heard them whispering, still bickering. “Good bye!” I told them again.
“Bye doll. We’ll see you in the morning,” Rhonda said.
I heard the door close and heaved a huge sigh of relief.
It felt like I had just closed my eyes when I heard the door open again, waking me from what was a very short-lived nap. I turned to look over my shoulder and saw a sweet face looking back at me. I could see the sun’s rays coming through the window, illuminating the room, but the light of innocence was lost on this little boy’s face.
“Hey sweetie, are you lost?” I asked the little boy. He had eyes that were crystal blue with auburn hair and pale skin. The eyes made my heart hurt, because they reminded me so much of Damien.
Why didn’t he just tell me what he was feeling, or was I imagining it all?
“I want my mommy,” the boy cried and ran to my bed, throwing his arms around my neck.
I was careful to make sure he didn’t get tangled in the tubes attached to me, but couldn’t help but feel sorrow for this child. He was crying hard, and it was like déjà vu because it reminded me of being in the same situation, where I was that child crying for my mommy. I rubbed his back as he sobbed into my gown.
“Noah! Noah!” I heard a frantic cry from a man as he ran past my room.
I tried to shout out to him, but the little boy squeezed my throat tighter with his embrace. I continued to rub his back while I shushed him, so he would calm down. I hoped that it would bring soothing comfort to him since he missed his mommy. I looked for the controller on the bed and pressed the button for the nurse. When someone spoke, I asked for a nurse to come to the room.
“Oh thank god!” said a petite nurse with red curls, her hand pressed to her heart. “We were looking everywhere for him.”
I smiled but continued to rock the little boy and rub his back. The nurse turned around and left, quickly returning with a striking man. He had the aura of bad boy with his tattoos, and I couldn’t help but stare.
“Noah!” he said with such relief, but the little boy wrapped his arms tighter around my neck. “Noah, the nice woman is sick, little guy.”
“Leave me alone Uncle Kyan!” he continued to sob, but I knew that name.
“I’m sorry ma’am,” he said, but then he looked at me. I knew those eyes; I had seen those eyes before.
His hazel depths with amber had always made me feel a bit overwhelmed. My gaze traveled down from his eyes and focused on his lips. He had snakebites piercings beneath his full lips, but I clearly remember wanting to kiss those lips.
“Mylie?” he said cautiously. I couldn’t believe it.
“Kyan, hey…”
Dear Lord, my summer heartbreaker is back in Pointe Hope.
I hadn’t seen him since I was fourteen years old, but Lord he looked good. My eyes trailed down his arms that were muscled with tatted sleeves, while his strong muscled chest was outlined in his black fitted t-shirt. My eyes continued down to his strong legs covered by faded ripped jeans and Harley Davidson boots. I started to trail my eyes back up and stopped.
Oh crap, I just looked at his penis!
I felt my face flush, and he had this gorgeous smirk on his face.
“Are you all right?” I nodded and smiled reassuringly, and for a minute there I thought I saw relief, which was strange. “I see you’ve met Hannah’s son.”
Wow, Hannah! It was his cousin’s son. I hadn’t seen her since her family moved to Morganville, and I never saw Kyan again.
“How is she doing?” I asked hesitantly, and I saw the pain in his eyes.
Oh gosh no.
“She–,” he cleared his throat. “She just passed. Noah ran off, not believing it.”
I gasped and shook my head.
Aww, I am such an asshole. How insensitive could I be?
“I am so sorry,” I said sadly.
I waved my hand for him to come in. I felt the little boy grow heavy, and his crying had stopped. I pulled my head back and noticed he was dead asleep. The nurse left us alone, and Kyan grabbed my hand. Dear Lord the fireworks went off in my stomach, and I was that desperate little girl hoping for my first kiss.
“Kyan?” a woman’s voice called out.
I looked up to see a very beautiful woman who was clearly looking at our clasped hands. I tried to free my hand, but he only held it tighter. I gave her a small smile. Her green eyes just gave me an icy glare and crossed her arms over her chest.