xanth 40 - isis orb (40 page)

“Princess Rhythm.” The one with red hair in a red dress smiled. Only her eyes did not match, being green.

“I’m the naughtiest,” Rhythm said proudly.

“Princess Harmony.” She had brown hair and eyes, and was in a brown dress.

“I’m the smartest,” Harmony said. “Soon I’ll marry Bryce.”

“You will not!” Bryce sputtered as all three princesses laughed. Was it a joke? Then he returned to the introductions. “The Princesses are general purpose Sorceresses. Any one is the match of any other Sorceress. Any two of them working together square the effect, and the three together cube it. So it is best to humor and perhaps to be a bit wary of them.”

“Uh,” Hapless said, daunted.

“We’ll gather here outside, on the patio,” Melody said. Princess Dawn, the proprietress of Caprice, will be along soon.” She glanced at Hapless. “I understand you can conjure instruments.”

“Uh, yes.”

“Excellent. Picka and Piper have their own, and the three of us too, but anyone else who wants to play will need them.”

“And here come Picka and Piper now,” Princess Rhythm said.

Hapless tried not to stare. Piper was a normal young man, but Picka was a walking skeleton. All bones, no flesh.

“They are Xanth’s finest musicians,” Princess Rhythm continued. They were? Hapless kept his mouth shut. “Picka Bone, Princess Dawn’s husband. Piper, who in his other form is a musical monster. Now let’s organize the ensemble.”

Princess Dawn’s husband? Musical monster? Hapless had to clamp down on his incredulity lest it explode and blow him to pieces.

The two males sat beside each other, and the three princesses nearby.

Feline poked Hapless in a rib. “Your cue,” she said.

Oh. Hapless went to stand before them, feeling hopelessly awkward. But what could he do? He lifted his wand and waved it.

The music was instant. Piper had a small flute he played with such expertise that it was like music from heaven. Picka detached his clavicles, the shoulder bones, and used them to play his ribs. Weird as it looked, the sound was perfect.

The three princesses had their own instruments. Harmony had a harmonica, Rhythm had a drum, and Melody sang, an almost bell-like soprano. Individually and together they were divine. As an ensemble, it was wonderful. He was conducting, but he felt as if he were doing so from a divine cloud.

The piece ended of its own accord, and Hapless collapsed the wand.

Then the players put aside their instruments and clapped their hands, applauding. “Rachel was right,” Piper said. “You are the conductor we need.”

“But I, uh, just waved my wand. You could have done just as well on your own.”

They shook their heads. “We have tried it,” Princess Melody said. “We are all good individually, but we lacked coordination. We overrode each other’s themes, we got the timing wrong. Only just now, with you conducting, did we get it right. Thanks to your magic.”

“You are the third greatest musician of Xanth, perhaps even the second or the first,” Piper said, and Picka nodded his empty head. “But your talent is expressed through others, empowering them.”

“Well, uh—”

“Now let’s add your Companions of the Quest,” Melody said.

“Um—”

The five Companions came up and took seats on the patio. Hapless conjured their instruments, and they made ready to play them. Now it was an ensemble of ten.

Feline made as if to poke another rib from a distance. “Conduct, dummy.”

Hapless conducted, and all ten participated. It was a new piece, wonderfully coordinated, phenomenally lovely. This time he felt as if he were perched atop the moon. It was absolutely glorious.

When it finished, they applauded again. “Oh, that was so great!” Zed said, setting down his saxophone.

“Oh, Princess Harmony, I was inspired to use the harmonica by your example,” Nya said. “It was amazing, playing here with you.”

“And my drum was inspired by you, Princess Rhythm,” Faro said. “I will remember this experience forever, even if we never do it again.”

“Oh, we’ll do it again,” Rhythm said. “Now that we’ve got our group.”

“I am minded to try one more round,” Piper said. “Some of our associates are not musical. Hapless, does your talent include them?”

“Uh, I suppose so. Anyone seems to be able to play in my presence.”

“Dear?” Picka said.

Princess Dawn stepped forward. “I am not at all sure about this.” She was a lovely figure of a woman, several years more mature than the triplet princesses. “Perhaps I should check Hapless first.”

“Check?” Hapless asked.

Princess Dawn approached him confidently. She reached out to touch his hand. “Oh, my!” she said. “Your talent and character are both special.”

“They are?”

“I should explain: I am a Sorceress, as are all the descendents of Great Grandpa Bink. My talent is to know all about any living thing I touch. So I have just been apprized of your encounter with the Goddess Isis, and the full nature of your formidable magic talent. We owe you a lot, Hapless.”

“I, uh—”

“Your modestly becomes you. Now I am curious to see whether your talent works on me. Please conjure me a musical instrument.”

“Uh, what one?”

“Any one. The least likely one.”

“A bassoon,” Picka called mischievously. “The most difficult instrument in an orchestra.”

A bassoon appeared in Hapless’s hands. He gave it to the princess.

“Oh, my,” she said. “I have never even touched one of these before. I have no idea how to play it.”

“Try,” Hapless suggested.

She tried, holding it before her and putting her mouth to the thin mouthpiece extending from its middle. And suddenly she was playing a compelling theme.

The members of the ensemble applauded.

“So it is true,” Dawn said, surprised despite her understanding of Hapless’s talent. She took her place beside Picka.

Several other non-musicians accepted instruments and joined the group, including Merge and Myst with their big and little xylophones. Then Hapless raised his wand and conducted them, and they all played marvelously together. It always happened when he conducted: each player, and the larger group, were perfect, needing no written music or rehearsal.

“That does it,” Dawn said, flushed. “You and your group will stay here at Caprice and join the ensemble. You were able to enable me to play an instrument I’d never touched before, and play it well. Your talent is simply too valuable to allow to go to waste.” She glanced at the assembled Companions with their instruments. “Between concerts, we can use the other talents of the members of your Quest. Nya, we will be visiting some obscure sections of Xanth, where your ability to relate to dragons, naga, and other crossbreeds will be valuable.” Nya nodded, satisfied. “Quin, there are some sections where the human form is preferred, but a dragon form may become necessary to keep the peace.” Quin nodded. “Zed and Faro, our children are away today, visiting Castle Roogna with the other dogs, but they will return tomorrow and will absolutely love to ride you, on the ground and in the air, if you can tolerate it.” Zed and Faro nodded; they would be happy to entertain children, in a context like this. “Feline, we have dogs galore here, but no cats at present. We need one. No castle is complete without a cat.” Feline nodded; this was something other than her curves.

Hapless was impressed. Princess Dawn clearly knew how to manage things. She must have touched the Companions and ascertained their natures.

Dawn took a breath. “Now Woofer and Rachel will show you to your rooms.”

“I’ll share his room,” Feline said. “We have business to attend to.”

“Not Merge?” Rachel asked.

“Not until they are married.”

Dawn looked at Merge, who nodded, faintly blushing. “Of course,” Dawn said smoothly.

Princess Harmony approached. “I will show them to their room,” she told the dog. Rachel nodded and went on to the next.

“I am so pleased to make your acquaintance, Hapless,” Harmony said as she gently guided them through the labyrinth that was the interior castle. “In fact, it’s an honor.”

“But I’m nobody,” he protested.

“A nobody with character.”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“It’s what you didn’t do,” Harmony said seriously. She looked into his face, and he was abruptly aware that this was far, far more than a triplet princess. Not only was she remarkably pretty, she was indeed a Sorceress, with powers he hardly guessed, and she was smart, informed and dedicated.

But still her remark confused him.

“Didn’t do?”

“I am slated to be the next King of Xanth, in due course. I have been preparing for the role for years. First I have to persuade Bryce to marry me; he remains uncommitted, but I don’t think he can hold out much longer. He does love me, as I love him.”

King of Xanth! The position he would have usurped, had he gone with the Goddess Isis. She knew!

She kissed him on the cheek. “We are going to get along.” She paused at a door, one among many. “This is your room. I’m sure you will find it an education.”

“Oh, yes,” Feline agreed, taking his hand possessively.

And Hapless realized that what he had here as an ordinary person was more valuable to him than what the Goddess had offered. A useful place in society, facilitating music. Friendship. Love. Not to mention what Feline had in mind for him.

For one thing, there were no suggestive shadows.

Author’s Note

On Apull 8, 2013 (in Xanth we use the Ogre Months, which are more dynamic than the dull ones of drear Mundania) I received an email letter from Heather Pryzstas: “One of the best things about being a mom has been watching my daughter grow to love reading as much as her father and I do. Now I get to share my love of Mr. Anthony’s work with her as well, and she’s devouring them just as I did (and still do!). She asked that I find a way to deliver the attached letter. I promised I would try my best.”

This, of course, is music to an author’s ears, hearing from dedicated fans who perpetuate the love of his writing so that future generations are similarly enthralled. The secret is the magic dust that wafts out from between the pages of the book and addicts the unwary reader to fantasy. But in these days of electronic publication (no physical pages) that is less reliable, so we still depend on long-time fans.

Here is her daughter’s letter:

Hello. I am Laurana Pryzstas age 10. I am a great fan of all your books Mr. Piers. I know I am probably just another piece of fan mail in a huge pile but all I ever wanted was a letter from you. I have an idea for a book called Isis Orb. It’s about a group of strangers [who] want to get their wishes. They are Quin the polite harpy dragon crossbreed who wants to find out how to become human. Then there’s Nya the dragon naga with wings who wants to find her purpose. Also there’s Zed the centaur whose father was a Mundane zebra so he has stripes he wants to find true love. The other two are the human cat crossbreed who wants someone who will love her even without curves. Last but not least is Fear O Heights, the winged centaur who wants to know how to get over her fear of heights. The story is that many years ago the Demon Xanth and Demon Earth made a wager and Xanth didn’t win. So Earth took a chunk of his magic in the form of the Isis Orb and hid it in the deepest core of Xanth. Now the Good Magician tells the group to find and control the Orb they must get the four totems of Fire, Air, Earth, and Water. The fire totem is the fire faun of blazing flame which is protected by an actual fire faun. Then there’s the six headed griffin of air protected by a six headed griffin. Next is the great six winged steam dragon of Earth protected by a six legged steam dragon. Lastly is the gorgon sea monster protected by itself again. I would love to see my ideas published one day but all I really want is a letter from you.

Sincerely
Sorceress Laurana

PS: my talent is to change anything!

PSS: That’s just the beginning of the story. I figured you could fill in most of it.

I considered the idea. I was then writing Xanth #39
Five Portraits
, but a year later, in 2014, I tackled
Isis Orb
. Well, I did fill in a few details. There are five Regions of Xanth; Laurana had not mentioned the Void, though obviously she knew of it because she had five characters to fetch the totems. There was a roughly similar story in
Swell Foop
, so I had to avoid being too close to that. When a series gets to be 40 novels long, it’s tricky to avoid stepping on its own toes. The name Fear O Heights was too obvious, so I made it a cruel nickname, digesting it down to Faro (Fear O). I researched the ancient Egyptian goddess Isis, who turned out to have an interesting history, and figured out how she could get involved in Xanth, which is not her mythology. Mainly I reshaped the story to avoid introducing five major characters together; the reader needs to get to know and appreciate them one by one. So they became Companions on the Quest. I introduced a new character to lead the Quest, Hapless, who then interacted with each of the others, spaced out. (Oh, come on, you know what I mean; it’s not a pun.) This is a standard device in novels: a way to see the main characters from another viewpoint. It went on from there, as you should have just read. (If you’re one of those characters who reads the Author’s Note first, stop it this instant.) It’s an adult novel, as all the Xanths are, which means that Laurana’s mother may have to check it first. As I told a critic, I refuse to censor my series for the sake of an audience for which it was not intended. Children read Xanth at their own risk from parents who think a child should not know what a panty is until age 21, if then. Fortunately few parents remember its naughtiness, and most children are too smart to tell. And it answers the question writers often get: where do you get your ideas? From my readers, obviously, and this is a prime example. Now you know.

My main research reference on Isis was
The Gods of the Egyptians
by E A Wallis Budge. It was there that I saw the theory that Christianity spread rapidly in the Roman Empire because it was merely a paste-over of familiar Egyptian mythology, easy to accept because the essence was unchanged. I’m not sure I believe that, but certainly Isis does, and she resents being displaced by the new fad after being dominant for thousands of years. Who knows; maybe her turn will come again. In fact, as I wrote this novel there was a new source of violence in the Near East as the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, known as ISIS, started conquering cities. Can that be coincidence? Isis was Egyptian, but surely her influence extended to nearby regions.