Yield (29 page)

“I hate you.”

My heart fluttered for some reason.  Ached for him.  I think he truly felt hate on the inside.  My magic was gone, but I could just feel it.

Both witnessed my physical reaction to it and looked my way.

“Her magic is there and waiting.  It is buried deep, but it will never leave her.  Be sure of the hate you feel, for she bears every pain you do at the moment no matter what decision is made.”

“What do we do once we find the gruroot?” he growled at the older lady before him.  He was standing over her like an alpha wolf about to pounce on an enemy.  I worried for both of them.

“Bring it to me.  Just be sure it is what you want.”  Grandma Clark didn’t look like her usually friendly facade.  Her face was drawn up like a rabid dog about to pounce back at the wolf.  Her squinted eyes looked every part the same as Ames and I wondered if either of them knew how much they were alike.

“What will you do to get her magic back?”

“I will make the same as before, but this time there has to be a sacrifice.  For her to gain magic, she has to give up the one true thing that means most to her.  Her greatest loss.”

“Then I won
’t do it.  The magic is not that important.  I don’t know why we are even having this whole conversation,” I said with all the conviction I could throw out.  I hated the smug look on the woman’s face.  She didn’t care one iota about Ames’ happiness. 

“
I don’t believe you,” Ames seethed, his hands shaking.  Their faces were so close.

“Then she doesn
’t get her magic back.”

“We will see about that.”

Like a light bulb switching on again, the room got brighter when Ames pulled away.  Grandma Clark stomped out without another word and Ames was all over me like a fire longing for a blaze.

He shuddered all around me as he wrapped his huge arms in a swallowing me whole motion.  I could feel the firmness of his body from beneath the shirt he wore making me feel both protected and swoony all in one.

“I’m sorry.  I just got so angry.  She doesn’t care about either of us at all.”

“
I don’t need magic, Ames.  I don’t see why you are so intent on getting it back.”

He eased back just enough to pull my chin up.  “I
’m the reason you lost it.  I will get it back for you.  She’s a liar and a thief.  Don’t listen to her.”

“
I don’t want it back at the cost of losing you. This is just plain silly.”

“No.  That woman deserves to see us happy and going against everything she has ruined.  I refuse to let her win.”  He pounded the wall beside him sending vibrations against my skin and a second hole. 

“So this is about revenge.”  Man or not, he still held some of the rage he held onto from his past.  He didn’t like being made a fool.

“No, it
’s about you.  I don’t like the way she treats you.  She acts like she’s besting me if it’s hurting you.”

“I agree, but that doesn
’t make it right for you to sink to her level.  You butt heads out of hereditary likeness, but she is the bad guy here, Ames.  She just wants you in the coven spot and away from here.  I don’t think it has to do with me necessarily, but more that taking me out of the equation makes you ready to want to go to her.  Seeing her act the way she does and knowing what my own grandmother did to help the atrocious acts doesn’t make me anxious to gain the magic back.”

I could see her point.  I wouldn
’t either.  But I had to right the wrong.

“
I don’t think I can go through life knowing you gave it up for me.”

“
Then don’t.  I’m not missing anything but your vivid emotions.  I would love to have the feeling back every time you give me that look and I know inside you want me at that moment, but you could find other ways of letting me know that.  Unless your feelings have changed.”

The heat in her face rose.  She was trying to be daring and giving me what I needed at the same time.  I knew she was way out of her comfort zone on the idea of “wanting her” and I couldn
’t wait to show her just how much, but it was more than that.  With her, I needed to know she didn’t think I was a worthless piece of crap for a man that I knew I was.  All I ever seem to do well is let her down.

“If you knew how much that were untrue, you
’d never say it.  You can’t possibly know how much I have wanted something more than anything else in my life.”

Her breath hitched.  Her chest rose.  Her eyes dilated.  She just didn
’t know anything about the way I feel even with the major effort I’ve given to tell her.  I needed to show her.

My mind was made up.  Without a single conflicting emotion, I dropped to my knee in the middle of my own room and slipped the little sliver of gold that would wrap around her finger shining like the sun that she was to me.   I would give her a week, two at the most.

“Emma...Jem Loggin, will you marry me?”

I have no idea why he was asking me now, but I didn
’t care.  I was ready.  I was
sooo
ready.

  “Ames Cahn, I love you more than anything in the world.”  I kissed his cheek, his stubble, his chin.

“I need an answer, Emma.”

Oh.  “Yes.  Yes.  Yes!”

He kissed me soft and sweet, taking his time.  When he let go and hovered over my mouth I asked carefully not wanting to strain the moment, “What changed your mind?”  I stared helplessly at the two green emeralds set like eyes in the gold.

His head leaned back away to see mine.  “About what?” he asked.

“Giving up on getting my magic back.”

His breath swept across my face.  “Who said I was?”

I would find the combination needed for the concoction, get the gruroot, and return what was taken from the girl I love.  And no witch or anyone else was going to stop me.

The next day wavered on the brink of more celebration than I
’d ever seen.  Emma was mauled by every single female in the realm, asked the most embarrassing questions I’d ever heard from a girl, and fawned over by every age imaginable.  When they say females are the exaggeration of a cat in heat, I believe it whole-heartedly. 

I sneaked a kiss as one of the rather young ones asked her if we
’d had sex yet.  I bugged my eyes out at the girl thinking she couldn’t be more than fifteen.  Lord, what do girls talk about when I’m not around. 

Scratch that.  I wouldn
’t want to know.

“I will meet you for a very private lunch away from crass ladies who speak so forward with my bride to be.”

She beamed like I love and I strutted away when the same young lady commented on my ass.  I wanted to take her straight to her father and tell him what was coming out of his little girl’s mouth, but then thought better of the idea.  If all she was doing was dreaming of her own female fairy tales like Emma described sometimes, she was just asking questions.  Maybe the assessment on my backside was a little much, but I hated to know what was said when I left.  Again, it was better to not know.  However, I did walk slow enough to hear Emma’s response.  I’m pretty sure she doesn’t think I heard because I can’t imagine her wanting me to know she just rated me a ten like a piece of meat. 

I texted Wicker and told him my plan.  He gathered every available man and
had them follow me to the cabin.  Every man we trusted.  Telling others about the ruins of our lost realm was only mine for so much longer and only shared with Emma and my friends purposefully at this point.  But since I found out Joshlin knew all about it and he’d told others, I was not opposed to sharing the historical evidence that we were once a different people.  Just not yet. Wicker, Trigger, and I have found many artifacts since being down there.  We’d cleaned out an entire room of records though none had informed us of anything we really needed to know.

“I haven
’t found any evidence of a room behind this one.”

I was too young to remember.  My mind created half of what I picture it to have looked like, but I just don
’t remember. 

“We keep digging then.”

“Beg your pardon, sir. I know the layout.”

I turned back to the three guys Wicker recruited.  Jones stood beside him with eager eyes.

“How?”

“My grandfather and father helped move rooms around once.  The king, King Jared, said his wife wanted everything rearranged.  I was young, but I remember which room moved where.”

I knew Jones was older than me, but I didn’t remember him being that much older.  “Where do we start?”

Feeling appreciated, Jones started outlining a path.  This was going to be easier than I thought.  After this feat, I would get the combination needed even if I had to steal it under the old woman
’s craphead nose.  She didn’t deserve to be called my grandmother and now I wish I’d never given her the time of day.  I wish like anything I could take back ever going to see her in the first place.

I haven
’t been given this much attention in my whole life. When I met Caydon, the people at my realm were doting and well attentive, but this was through the roof.

The best part of showing off the ring was the reaction to what Ames said he picked it to represent. 

“I wanted you to know how much I love you and would always be with you.  When you are lonely, know that my eyes are always on you.”  He kissed the ring and blinked his eyes at me purposefully.  His eyes were my emeralds and I would always carry them with me.  He really couldn’t claim non-romantic.

Granted he also added that it was a reminder that no other man had right to look upon me for he would see.  Worse, I think he was serious.  I hoped there wasn
’t some X-ray camera vision watching me in the shower or something from the ring.  I giggled just thinking about it.

Young girls, old ladies, girls my own age, all of them.  They all wanted to know every little detail about how we met, how he proposed, and if we had
SEX
!

Women were so forceful in the gossip department.  Tonya had been that way, but I always shut her off.  I didn
’t want to shut down in front of these people.  They truly had become my friends.

I think half of them were disappointed Ames and I hadn
’t done the deed yet. When I told them it meant more than what they called it and that it was very special for a goblin king and queen, they all swooned and said they would come back after the wedding.

Oh
, brother.

I didn
’t hate the attention, just the embarrassment.  Some things were better left part of your soul and not shared with others.  With Ames, he was my soul and I didn’t want anyone to know how much he was a part of me.  I wanted that all for us.

And with that thought, I realized he spent much of the time pouring his poetically hidden heart to me and I remained passively quiet.  I vowed to share with him just how much I cared about him.  Vulnerability isn
’t so scary when you feel it in your very soul that they accept you no matter what or how you evolve.  He loved me magically or not.

Emma was so reluctant to let me go.  She
’d never been so clingy but I think she knew I was up to something.

I told her Wicker and Trigger would be with me.  She didn
’t seem so comforted by that idea, but she let me go.  Look at me.  I was asking permission to go somewhere already.  As always, I could hear Wicker’s snorts of contempt of being a wrapped wuss. 

I didn
’t care.  I had the girl.

“You really need to make your move on Katelyn man before you lose her.”

“Her birthday is in seven months. When she turns eighteen, I will make her mine.”  Wicker patted his pants leg to checklist all the items he needed.

Honorable
as it was, he just admitted what I needed.  “Don’t you rag on me ever again for being the good type, man.  You ooze smuck all over the place.”

“Pot calling the
kettle by his own name.”

“Just as long as you admit it.”

Wicker stopped packing the black duffle bag of equipment to stare over at me, “Would either of us want it any other way?”

“Nope!” 

“You two hearts and rainbows ready to do this or not,” Trigger asked already blacked out and waiting impatiently while shooting fake arrows.

Born ready.  “If it doesn
’t look like we can get it together, you both are out of the house before she knows it.”

“Yeah, yeah.  Big Bad Wolfy Grandma gonna smack us with her mojo mamba.  I
’ve got it covered.  If she tries anything, I’ll nail her on the jaw with my fist.”  Trigger was some character.  I’m not for hitting a girl, but I no longer see the hag as my grandmother either.

“Trigger, never change.”

“Wouldn’t want ya to miss out on my wisdomatic moments.”

“Not a word
, Trigger.” 

He pouted,
“You let Emma make up words.  Why does she get special treatment?”

I lifted my gloved hands to check my weapons front and back then grinned at him funny, “
You offering?”

Trigger spit on the ground.  “Disgusting
, man.  Don’t even joke that way.”

“
Then don’t equate yourself to her.  You’re not in her league.”

“No one is.”

Got that right.

“Let
’s go.”  I started the Jeep while Wicker packed our one bag in the back.  It wouldn’t take much to break into the old hag’s place, but it would take plenty to find the missing list I needed.