You're Teaching My Child What? (30 page)
Read You're Teaching My Child What? Online
Authors: Miriam Grossman
2
Margo Adler, Wade F. Horn, and James Wagoner, “Abstinence-Only Education,” Justice Talking, July 9, 2007. Downloaded from
http://www.justicetalking.org/ShowPage.aspx?ShowID=426
.
Margo Adler, Wade F. Horn, and James Wagoner, “Abstinence-Only Education,” Justice Talking, July 9, 2007. Downloaded from
http://www.justicetalking.org/ShowPage.aspx?ShowID=426
.
3
Perhaps the interviewer thought she was being balanced by also having on the executive director of the National Abstinence Education Association, Valerie Huber.
Perhaps the interviewer thought she was being balanced by also having on the executive director of the National Abstinence Education Association, Valerie Huber.
4
“Young people explore their sexuality as part of a process of achieving sexual maturity; adolescents are capable of expressing their sexuality in healthy, responsible ways.” See for example: “We Believe,” Planned Parenthood of Indiana,
http://www.ppin.org/values.aspx
.
“Young people explore their sexuality as part of a process of achieving sexual maturity; adolescents are capable of expressing their sexuality in healthy, responsible ways.” See for example: “We Believe,” Planned Parenthood of Indiana,
http://www.ppin.org/values.aspx
.
5
Debra W. Haffner, “Sexual Health for America's Adolescents,”
Journal of School Health
66, no. 4 (1998): 151â2. This report was a statement of the National Commission on Adolescent Sexual Health, consisting of 21 of the nation's leading medical, psychological, education, and youth-serving professionals. The Commission's report was based on a Consensus Statement on Adolescent Sexual Health, “endorsed by more than 50 national organizations.”
Debra W. Haffner, “Sexual Health for America's Adolescents,”
Journal of School Health
66, no. 4 (1998): 151â2. This report was a statement of the National Commission on Adolescent Sexual Health, consisting of 21 of the nation's leading medical, psychological, education, and youth-serving professionals. The Commission's report was based on a Consensus Statement on Adolescent Sexual Health, “endorsed by more than 50 national organizations.”
6
“The Commission felt strongly that intercourse is developmentally disadvantageous for the youngest adolescents because they do not have the cognitive or emotional maturity for involvement in intimate sexual behaviors, especially intercourse.”
“The Commission felt strongly that intercourse is developmentally disadvantageous for the youngest adolescents because they do not have the cognitive or emotional maturity for involvement in intimate sexual behaviors, especially intercourse.”
7
“Health Education: Sexâsafer and satisfying,” Planned Parenthood, available at:
http://www.pposbc.org/education/safeSex.asp
.
“Health Education: Sexâsafer and satisfying,” Planned Parenthood, available at:
http://www.pposbc.org/education/safeSex.asp
.
9
Similar guidance is found on
www.GoAskAlice.com
,
www.positive.org
,
www.iwannaknow.org
,
www.scarleteen.com
, and many other resources.
Similar guidance is found on
www.GoAskAlice.com
,
www.positive.org
,
www.iwannaknow.org
,
www.scarleteen.com
, and many other resources.
10
Elisa Klein, “Am I Ready?” Planned Parenthood; available at:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/teen-talk/sex-masturbation/teens-virginity/am-ready-25396.htm
Elisa Klein, “Am I Ready?” Planned Parenthood; available at:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/teen-talk/sex-masturbation/teens-virginity/am-ready-25396.htm
11
Most girls feel they were too young at time of first intercourse (see Susan Rosenthal et al, “Heterosexual Romantic Relationships and Sexual Behaviors of Young Adolescent Girls,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
21 (1997):238â43.)
Most girls feel they were too young at time of first intercourse (see Susan Rosenthal et al, “Heterosexual Romantic Relationships and Sexual Behaviors of Young Adolescent Girls,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
21 (1997):238â43.)
12
In a Planned Parenthood classroom activity for young adults, students examine the ways they would feel comfortable being intimate, and where they would draw the line. Possible activities to suggest to students include: skinny dipping, sleeping together without sex, showering, and massage (
www.plannedparenthood.org/resources/lesson-plans/wheres-your-line.htm
).
In a Planned Parenthood classroom activity for young adults, students examine the ways they would feel comfortable being intimate, and where they would draw the line. Possible activities to suggest to students include: skinny dipping, sleeping together without sex, showering, and massage (
www.plannedparenthood.org/resources/lesson-plans/wheres-your-line.htm
).
13
“Q & A with Dr. Cullins,” available at
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/ask-dr-cullins-6602.htm
“Q & A with Dr. Cullins,” available at
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/ask-dr-cullins-6602.htm
14
“Ask Dr. Cullins: Birth Control,”
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/ask-dr-cullins/ask-dr-cullins-birth-control-5472.htm
.
“Ask Dr. Cullins: Birth Control,”
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/ask-dr-cullins/ask-dr-cullins-birth-control-5472.htm
.
Q: My daughter is 12. I've talked with her about menstruation and sex. She hasn't started her period yet. Should I take her to my gynecologist for an exam when she starts? If not, what age should she go? Is it appropriate for me to start her on some type of birth control when she starts having her period? I had her at the age of 16, and I'm scared to death of her going through the same thing!
A: Gynecological exams are not necessary as soon as a young woman starts having her period. We now recommend that young women start having pelvic exams with Pap tests within three years of starting vaginal intercourse. If a young woman has not had first vaginal intercourse by age 21, then she should have a pelvic exam when she becomes 21âeven though she has not had vaginal intercourse. Of course, gynecologic visits are a very good idea if sexual or reproductive health concerns or problems arise earlier than within three years of starting vaginal intercourse or age 21.
Young women should be counseled about their birth control options before they become sexually active. They may want to consider taking regular, ongoing, highly effective hormonal prescription methods before beginning vaginal intercourse because of the health benefits of some methods. After they have been used for a few months, combined hormone methods such as the pill and the patch offer health benefits, including lighter periods, less bleeding during periods, less pain with periods, more regular periods, and reduced acne. Combined hormone methods also offer advanced protection against pregnancy as a woman reaches the point in her life when she decides to have vaginal intercourse.
When it comes to sexual and reproductive health, young women are often more comfortable with health care providers who are not also their parent's providers. Even young women who talk with their parents about sex and sexuality may be more trusting and confident with their own providers. Ask your daughter whether she wants her own personal clinicianâa clinician different from her pediatrician, your family-medicine doctor or nurse practitioner, or your gynecologistâto take care of her now that she is older. Respect whatever decision she makes, and help her to find a caring provider if she chooses to change providers. Regardless of the provider they choose, young people should be encouraged to have their visits in privateâby themselves. They should also be given every assurance that their confidences will be respected.
16
Society for Adolescent Medicine, “Guidelines for Adolescent Health Research: A Position Paper of the Society for Adolescent Medicine,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
33 (2003): 396â409. Available from
http://www.adolescenthealth.org/PositionPaper_Guidelines_for_Adolescent_Health_Research.pdf
.
Society for Adolescent Medicine, “Guidelines for Adolescent Health Research: A Position Paper of the Society for Adolescent Medicine,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
33 (2003): 396â409. Available from
http://www.adolescenthealth.org/PositionPaper_Guidelines_for_Adolescent_Health_Research.pdf
.
18
Robert E. Rector and Kirk A. Johnson, Ph.D., “Teenage Sexual Abstinence and Academic Achievement”; available online at:
http://www.heritage.org/Research/Welfare/upload/84576_1.pdf
.
Robert E. Rector and Kirk A. Johnson, Ph.D., “Teenage Sexual Abstinence and Academic Achievement”; available online at:
http://www.heritage.org/Research/Welfare/upload/84576_1.pdf
.
19
Robert E. Rector, Kirk A. Johnson, Ph.D., Lauren R. Noyes, and Shannan Martin, “The Harmful Effects of Early Sexual Activity and Multiple Sexual Partners Among Women: A Book of Charts”; available online at:
http://www.heritage.org/Research/Family/upload/44695_2.pdf
.
Robert E. Rector, Kirk A. Johnson, Ph.D., Lauren R. Noyes, and Shannan Martin, “The Harmful Effects of Early Sexual Activity and Multiple Sexual Partners Among Women: A Book of Charts”; available online at:
http://www.heritage.org/Research/Family/upload/44695_2.pdf
.
20
In adult women using hormonal contraceptives, the probability of failure in the first 12 months is 7 percent (injectable) and 9 percent (oral). (Kathryn Kost et al, “Estimates of contraceptive failure from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth,”
Contraception
77 (2008): 10â21); typical use by
adult
women of oral contraceptives results in pregnancy in 8 percent of them within the first year (
www.guttmacher.org/in-the-know/prevention.html
).
In adult women using hormonal contraceptives, the probability of failure in the first 12 months is 7 percent (injectable) and 9 percent (oral). (Kathryn Kost et al, “Estimates of contraceptive failure from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth,”
Contraception
77 (2008): 10â21); typical use by
adult
women of oral contraceptives results in pregnancy in 8 percent of them within the first year (
www.guttmacher.org/in-the-know/prevention.html
).
23
Elise DeVore and Kenneth R. Ginsburg, “The protective effects of good parenting on adolescents,”
Current Opinion in Pediatrics
17, no.4 (August 2005): 460â65.
Elise DeVore and Kenneth R. Ginsburg, “The protective effects of good parenting on adolescents,”
Current Opinion in Pediatrics
17, no.4 (August 2005): 460â65.
24
Most of this material is from DeVore and Ginsburg, 2005.
Most of this material is from DeVore and Ginsburg, 2005.
25
If the girl is out of control and nothing adults do has any impact, the answer is still not birth control; it's crisis intervention by a team of mental health professionals.
If the girl is out of control and nothing adults do has any impact, the answer is still not birth control; it's crisis intervention by a team of mental health professionals.
26
Laurence Steinberg, Susie D. Lamborn, Sanford M. Dornbusch, and Nancy Darling, “Impact of Parenting Practices on Adolescent Achievement: Authoritative Parenting, School Involvement, and Encouragement to Succeed,”
Child Development
63 (1992):1266â81; Laurence Steinberg, “We Know Some Things: Parent-Adolescent Relationships in Retrospect and Prospect,”
Journal of Research on Adolescence
11, no.1 (2001): 1â19.
Laurence Steinberg, Susie D. Lamborn, Sanford M. Dornbusch, and Nancy Darling, “Impact of Parenting Practices on Adolescent Achievement: Authoritative Parenting, School Involvement, and Encouragement to Succeed,”
Child Development
63 (1992):1266â81; Laurence Steinberg, “We Know Some Things: Parent-Adolescent Relationships in Retrospect and Prospect,”
Journal of Research on Adolescence
11, no.1 (2001): 1â19.
27
While this is unlikely to be the case for this girl, the information may be relevant for siblings. This is general information that every parent should have.
While this is unlikely to be the case for this girl, the information may be relevant for siblings. This is general information that every parent should have.
28
Under the age of 17.
Under the age of 17.
29
Before she turned 5. Bruce J. Ellis, John E. Bates, Kenneth A. Dodge, David M. Fergusson, L. John Horwood, Gregory S. Pettit, and Lianne Woodward, “Does Father Absence Place Daughters at Special Risk for Early Sexual Activity and Teenage Pregnancy?”
Child Development
74, no.3 (May/June 2003): 801â821.
Before she turned 5. Bruce J. Ellis, John E. Bates, Kenneth A. Dodge, David M. Fergusson, L. John Horwood, Gregory S. Pettit, and Lianne Woodward, “Does Father Absence Place Daughters at Special Risk for Early Sexual Activity and Teenage Pregnancy?”
Child Development
74, no.3 (May/June 2003): 801â821.
30
“Having an unrelated male in the home is also associated with earlier puberty.” In Bruce J. Ellis, “Timing of Pubertal Maturation in Girls: An Integrated Life History Approach,”
Psychological Bulletin
130, no.6 (November 2004): 920â58; Bruce J. Ellis and Judy Garber, “Psychosocial antecedents
of variation in girls' pubertal timing: Maternal depression, stepfather presence, and marital and family stress,”
Child Development
71, no.2 (March/April 2000): 485â501; Terry E. Moffitt, Avshalom Caspi, Jay Belsky, and Phil A. Silva, “Childhood Experience and the Onset of Menarche: A Test of a Sociobiological Model,”
Child Development
63, no.1 (February 1992): 47â58; Bruce J. Ellis, John E. Bates, Kenneth A. Dodge, David M. Fergusson, L. John Horwood, Gregory S. Pettit, and Lianne Woodward, “Does Father Absence Place Daughters at Special Risk for Early Sexual Activity and Teenage Pregnancy?”
Child Development
74, no.3 (May/June 2003): 801â21. Regarding the increased risk to early-maturing girls, see Laurence Steinberg and Amanda S. Morris, “Adolescent Development,”
Annual Review of Psychology
1, no.52 (February 2001): 83â110; also see Ronald Rohner and Robert Veneziano, “The Importance of Father Love: History and Contemporary Evidence,”
Review of General Psychology
5, no.4 (2001): 382â405; Mark D. Regnerus and Laura B. Luchies, “The Parent-Child Relationship and Opportunities for Adolescents' First Sex,”
Journal of Family Issues
27, no.2 (2006): 159â83.
“Having an unrelated male in the home is also associated with earlier puberty.” In Bruce J. Ellis, “Timing of Pubertal Maturation in Girls: An Integrated Life History Approach,”
Psychological Bulletin
130, no.6 (November 2004): 920â58; Bruce J. Ellis and Judy Garber, “Psychosocial antecedents
of variation in girls' pubertal timing: Maternal depression, stepfather presence, and marital and family stress,”
Child Development
71, no.2 (March/April 2000): 485â501; Terry E. Moffitt, Avshalom Caspi, Jay Belsky, and Phil A. Silva, “Childhood Experience and the Onset of Menarche: A Test of a Sociobiological Model,”
Child Development
63, no.1 (February 1992): 47â58; Bruce J. Ellis, John E. Bates, Kenneth A. Dodge, David M. Fergusson, L. John Horwood, Gregory S. Pettit, and Lianne Woodward, “Does Father Absence Place Daughters at Special Risk for Early Sexual Activity and Teenage Pregnancy?”
Child Development
74, no.3 (May/June 2003): 801â21. Regarding the increased risk to early-maturing girls, see Laurence Steinberg and Amanda S. Morris, “Adolescent Development,”
Annual Review of Psychology
1, no.52 (February 2001): 83â110; also see Ronald Rohner and Robert Veneziano, “The Importance of Father Love: History and Contemporary Evidence,”
Review of General Psychology
5, no.4 (2001): 382â405; Mark D. Regnerus and Laura B. Luchies, “The Parent-Child Relationship and Opportunities for Adolescents' First Sex,”
Journal of Family Issues
27, no.2 (2006): 159â83.
31
P. Donovan, “Mother's Attitudes Toward Adolescent Sex, Family's Dating Rules Influence Teenagers' Sexual Behavior,”
Family Planning Perspectives
27, no.4 (1995): 177â78; Renee Sieving, Clea S. McNeely, and Robert Wm. Blum, “Maternal Expectations, Mother-Child Connectedness, and Adolescent Sexual Debut,”
Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine
154 (2000): 809â16; Melina Bersamin, Michael Todd, Deborah A. Fisher, Douglas L. Hill, Joel W. Grube, and Samantha Walker, “Parenting Practices and Adolescent Sexual Behavior: A Longitudinal Study,”
Journal of Marriage and the Family
70, no.1 (February 2008): 97â112.
P. Donovan, “Mother's Attitudes Toward Adolescent Sex, Family's Dating Rules Influence Teenagers' Sexual Behavior,”
Family Planning Perspectives
27, no.4 (1995): 177â78; Renee Sieving, Clea S. McNeely, and Robert Wm. Blum, “Maternal Expectations, Mother-Child Connectedness, and Adolescent Sexual Debut,”
Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine
154 (2000): 809â16; Melina Bersamin, Michael Todd, Deborah A. Fisher, Douglas L. Hill, Joel W. Grube, and Samantha Walker, “Parenting Practices and Adolescent Sexual Behavior: A Longitudinal Study,”
Journal of Marriage and the Family
70, no.1 (February 2008): 97â112.
32
Michael Ungar, “The importance of parents and other caregivers to the resilience of high-risk adolescents,”
Family Process
43, no.1 (February 2004): 23â41; M. Resnick, P. Bearman, R. W. Blum, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm: Findings from the National Longitudinal Study on Adolescent Health,”
JAMA
278 (1997): 823â32; Renee Sieving, et al, “Maternal Expectations.”
Michael Ungar, “The importance of parents and other caregivers to the resilience of high-risk adolescents,”
Family Process
43, no.1 (February 2004): 23â41; M. Resnick, P. Bearman, R. W. Blum, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm: Findings from the National Longitudinal Study on Adolescent Health,”
JAMA
278 (1997): 823â32; Renee Sieving, et al, “Maternal Expectations.”
33
Allowing a teen to make health decisions in a closed room with her provider undermines and weakens the parent-child relationship. Planned Parenthood does that with this approach.
Allowing a teen to make health decisions in a closed room with her provider undermines and weakens the parent-child relationship. Planned Parenthood does that with this approach.
34
C. Lammers, M. Ireland, and M. Resnick, “Influences on adolescents' decision to postpone onset of sexual intercourse: a survival analysis of virginity among youths aged 13 to 18 years,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
26, no.1 (January 2000): 42â48; M. Resnick, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm.”
C. Lammers, M. Ireland, and M. Resnick, “Influences on adolescents' decision to postpone onset of sexual intercourse: a survival analysis of virginity among youths aged 13 to 18 years,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
26, no.1 (January 2000): 42â48; M. Resnick, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm.”
35
Between the ages of 15 and 18.
Between the ages of 15 and 18.
36
Laura Fingerson, “Do Mothers' Opinions Matter in Teens' Sexual Activity?”
Journal of Family Issues
26, no.7 (2005): 947.
Laura Fingerson, “Do Mothers' Opinions Matter in Teens' Sexual Activity?”
Journal of Family Issues
26, no.7 (2005): 947.
37
Kimberly K. Usher-Seriki , Mia Smith Bynum, and Tamora A. Callands, “MotherâDaughter Communication About Sex and Sexual Intercourse
Among Middle- to Upper-Class African American Girls,”
Journal of Family Issues
29, no.7 (2008): 901â17; P. J. Dittus and J. Jaccard, “Adolescents' perceptions of maternal disapproval of sex: relationship to sexual outcomes,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
26, no.4 (April 2000): 268â78.
Kimberly K. Usher-Seriki , Mia Smith Bynum, and Tamora A. Callands, “MotherâDaughter Communication About Sex and Sexual Intercourse
Among Middle- to Upper-Class African American Girls,”
Journal of Family Issues
29, no.7 (2008): 901â17; P. J. Dittus and J. Jaccard, “Adolescents' perceptions of maternal disapproval of sex: relationship to sexual outcomes,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
26, no.4 (April 2000): 268â78.
38
One study of Asian and Pacific Islander teens concludes, “[This] highlights how powerful and simple an intervention can be between mothers and adolescents.” ( Hyeouk Hahm et al, “Longitudinal Effects of Perceived Maternal Approval on Sexual Behaviors of Asian and Pacific Islander (API) Young Adults,”
Journal Youth Adolescence
37 (2008): 74â84.)
One study of Asian and Pacific Islander teens concludes, “[This] highlights how powerful and simple an intervention can be between mothers and adolescents.” ( Hyeouk Hahm et al, “Longitudinal Effects of Perceived Maternal Approval on Sexual Behaviors of Asian and Pacific Islander (API) Young Adults,”
Journal Youth Adolescence
37 (2008): 74â84.)
39
V. Minichiello, S. Paxton, and V. Cowling, “Religiosity, sexual behavior and safe sex practices: Further evidence,”
Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health
20, no.3 (June 1996):321â22; M. Resnick, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm”; Michael J. Donahue and Peter L. Benson, “Religion and the Well-Being of Adolescents,”
Journal of Social Issues
51, no. 2 (Summer 1995): 145â60.
V. Minichiello, S. Paxton, and V. Cowling, “Religiosity, sexual behavior and safe sex practices: Further evidence,”
Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health
20, no.3 (June 1996):321â22; M. Resnick, et al, “Protecting Adolescents from Harm”; Michael J. Donahue and Peter L. Benson, “Religion and the Well-Being of Adolescents,”
Journal of Social Issues
51, no. 2 (Summer 1995): 145â60.
40
Laura Fingerson, “Do Mothers' Opinions Matter in Teens' Sexual Activity?”
Journal of Family Issues
26, no. 7 (2005): 947â74.
Laura Fingerson, “Do Mothers' Opinions Matter in Teens' Sexual Activity?”
Journal of Family Issues
26, no. 7 (2005): 947â74.
41
X. Li, S. Feigelman, and B. Stanton, “Perceived parental monitoring and health risk behaviors among urban low-income African-American children and adolescents,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
27 (2000): 43â48; A.A. Rai, B. Stanton, Y. Wu, et al, “Relative influences of perceived parental monitoring and perceived peer involvement on adolescent risk behaviors: an analysis of six cross-sectional data sets,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
33 (2003):108â18.
X. Li, S. Feigelman, and B. Stanton, “Perceived parental monitoring and health risk behaviors among urban low-income African-American children and adolescents,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
27 (2000): 43â48; A.A. Rai, B. Stanton, Y. Wu, et al, “Relative influences of perceived parental monitoring and perceived peer involvement on adolescent risk behaviors: an analysis of six cross-sectional data sets,”
Journal of Adolescent Health
33 (2003):108â18.
Other books
Hook Shot Hero by Matt Christopher
Loverly:The Life and Times of My Fair Lady (Broadway Legacies) by McHugh, Dominic
My Husband and My Wives: A Gay Man's Odyssey by Charles Rowan Beye
The Duppy by Anthony C. Winkler
Lie to Me: A Contemporary Billionaire BWWM Romance by Mia Caldwell
Slow Kill by Michael McGarrity
Someone by Alice McDermott
Shuteye for the Timebroker by Paul Di Filippo
The Duke's Runaway Princess (Love By Accident) by Elizabeth Lennox
