Zane's Z-Rated: Chocolate Flava 3 (38 page)

Then there was the Alaskan Malamute my best friend, Judy,
had on a leash for a hot second. She assumed that since his well-muscled, heavy-bone behind had spent his early years out in the middle of nowhere, chilling in igloos and riding bobsleds to school, that he would be devoted and trustworthy. Not! He was the alpha male of all motherfucking alpha males and when she bored him, he was prone to aggression. In other words, he started beating her ass. Now, by this point, she was completely dick-whipped and no one could tell her a thing about her relationship without practically getting their head snapped clean off. I spoke my mind once and left the entire display of “fuckery” alone. I loved my girl but if she wanted to deal with Kuvageegai—hell of a name, right?—instead of sending his ass back home to hunt seals, it was on her.

Eventually, Judy learned her lesson; they all did. They ended up jumping from man to man, looking for that pipe dream of a financially and mentally stable soul mate that would be exclusive to their pussies. I used to believe in fairy tales, too—for a hot minute. But I came to my senses after I went through a quick, successive series of breeds—a Boston Terrier, an Australian Kelpie, and a Chesapeake Bay Retriever. Then I decided I simply wanted to go to work every day, make a good life for myself, and fuck whom I wanted when I wanted.

However, even that should have had its limits and it’s the reason why I need to confess. After Judy got rid of “the motherfucker with the long-ass name,” she went through about nine or ten guys and then ended up shacking, within a matter of months, with William. Now, William had it going on, in all areas. He was about six foot two and beautiful, way past handsome. I couldn’t even call him that. He had this smooth, dark skin that was like being gifted a year’s worth of Godiva Chocolates. He had this kinky, black hair that screamed for a sister to run her hands
through it. And, most important, it was obvious that he was hung like a barnacle. Yes, a barnacle. Most women go around bragging about how their men are hung like horses or mules, but check this out. They’re not even in the top of the game. Damn shame I know this, but the barnacle has the biggest dick of any animal, followed by the Argentine blue-bill duck, a banana slug, a greater hooked squid, an African elephant,
Colymbosathon ecplecticos,
and a blue whale. Okay, so I was bored one day and looked that shit up. If I was going to be giving brothers mad props, I decided to get my knowledge straight.

Anyway, Judy had William, who was hung like a barnacle, and I was mad jealous. And I
never
got jealous. I’m not even sure how that happened, other than I was over their place one day, in the kitchen helping Judy peel some red potatoes to boil and mash for dinner, and that’s when I saw him; saw it. He was sitting on the sofa, at a good vantage point from where I was standing, drinking a beer while ESPN was playing, and staring dead at me. I almost cut my finger off with the potato peeler, I was so distracted by his mesmerizing eyes.

Our eyes locked while Judy was busy singing “We Found Love” by Rihanna. Little did I realize then that, like Rihanna, I was about to find love in a hopeless place. William broke our gaze and lowered his eyes to his crotch. I followed them and his dick was bouncing up and down in his pants like it had a mind of its own. Then again, I guess all men’s dicks have minds of their own. His was speaking to me … in tongues. It was calling my name, beckoning me to it and, if I hadn’t quickly regained my senses, I would’ve been over on that sofa in thirty seconds, ripping it out, and swallowing as much of it as I could cram into my mouth.

Somehow, we managed to get through dinner and then Judy
and I went into the basement, curled up in a couple of throws, and watched two tearjerkers—
Beaches
and
Imitation of Life
—together, as we always did. It felt good to cry together during movies about women who had much bigger issues than us and managed to overcome them. It helped us keep things in perspective when horrific things happened, like our Facebook or Twitter accounts being locked for twenty-four hours because we requested too many friends or “twatchers,” or the nail salon having a two-hour waiting list for pedicures.

Judy dozed off halfway through
The Stoning of Soraya M.
and I realized that she was out for the night. There are people who sleep lightly and can be awakened by a moth pissing on a cotton ball inside the drywall and others who sleep so hard that someone would have to slam their heads with a hammer three or four times to get their attention. Judy was one of those.

I should have kept my ass right down there and finished watching the movie, or I could have taken my ass home but … I heard William rattling some pans around in the kitchen.
Damn, was hung like a barnacle and did dishes, too!
Hearing his footsteps and knowing that he was up there alone, both him and that huge tumor between his legs, made my pussy get the hiccups. My menstrual cycle was a day or two away so I was extremely emotional and even more horny that time of the month.

I cleared my throat, making sure Judy was as knocked out as I thought she was. She didn’t move. I took a few kernels of kettle corn and tossed them at her forehead. She grunted and wiggled her nose but that was it. I stood up and stared down at her, thinking,
It’s not like he wasn’t going to cheat on you anyway.

When I got upstairs, William was putting the last of the glasses from dinner in the dishwasher.

“Is there something I can help you with?” I asked from the kitchen doorway.

He seemed startled. “Oh, hey, Marilyn.” He closed the dishwasher and turned it on. “No, I’m good, but thanks for offering.”

I put my hands on my hips and licked my lips seductively. “I have a lot of
offerings.
”

He blushed.
Damn, dimples! I’m too through!

He didn’t respond but there was no need. It was obvious we were on the same page. I walked over to him by the sink and flicked the tip of my tongue over his lips. He spread them for me and I went in.
Damn, and a fucking thick tongue to suck on my pussy!

We did a dance with both our bodies and our tongues for a few minutes. I debated about leading him to the bedroom but then decided, if I was going to go for it, why not the kitchen? After all, a lot of life-altering shit happens in kitchens across the globe. People make major life-decisions, they fight and argue, and even break up in kitchens. I had done all of the above in my lifetime but, as crazy as it sounded, I have never fucked in one. Now my pussy had the hiccups and asthma.

I broke the kiss and pulled William over by the table.

“Marilyn, we shouldn’t do this,” he protested … but only with his words.

I yanked his pants and boxers down in one swift movement. Then I sat down and gazed up into his eyes. “Are you telling me that you don’t want me to suck the skin off your dick?”

He sighed in defeat as I pushed his ass on the table, positioning him between my legs. The game was on. I grabbed his dick with both hands, spread my mouth open as far as I could and stuffed it with some delicious, protein-infused trouser snake.

“Ummm, ummm, ummm,” I moaned with delight, hardly believing how good he tasted to my palate. I took the mushroom head out for a minute. “You have an incredible dick, boo.”

“Glad you like it.” He glanced at the doorway. “You can have as much of this dick as you want.”

“I want it all, shit!”

William wanted some more of my good head and started motivating me by making it thump. I moved my mouth up, down, and around, trying to capture it, hands-free. Then I had to grab it again to steady it and continue my feast fit for the saints. I had to charm that damn snake into submission.

I sucked, licked, sucked, licked, sucked on balls, sucked, licked, tongue-flicked some ass, and then sucked and licked again until William couldn’t take it anymore. When I realized that he was about to shoot the mother lode, I quickly grabbed the small bowl of sugar on the table and caught all of his semen in it.

William looked shocked, even though he was trying to catch his breath. “What are you going to do with that?”

“Watch.”

I rose up from the table and switched over to the fridge. I opened the door and got out the small crate of strawberries that I had spotted in the drawer earlier when I retrieved the red potatoes. I took one out and smeared it in William’s cum, held it up so that I could gaze at its beauty, and then sucked on the end of it before biting it off.

“Shit! You get down like that!” William exclaimed.

“Oh, sugar, you haven’t seen a damn thing yet.” I dipped the strawberry again and took another bite. “I’m about to show you some shit you’ve never seen before.”

William chuckled. “Well, let’s pray I can handle it.”

I walked back over to the table and pushed him down into the chair that I had vacated. Then I pulled my sundress over my head in one swoop, exposing my banging black lace bra and panty set.

I ran my fingers down over my body. “Do you think this body can bring you pleasure?
Immense
pleasure?”

“Damn sure looks like it,” he replied as I lowered my bra straps and fed him one of my taut nipples. He circled it with his tongue. “Um, tasty.”

I took a strawberry and let the juice drip on my chest and over my breasts; then he licked it off. This went on for a good five minutes, William devouring my breasts like a starved man.

Meanwhile, at some point, my panties had dropped and were dangling around my right ankle. William started fingering my pussy and then he got creative like me. While he still had my left breast on lock with his mouth, suckling on it like a pacifier, he reached around me, got a strawberry from the crate, and swirled it in my pussy; some of the juice trickled down the inside of my thighs. It felt sticky but oh, so good.

That shit motivated me! I sat on the table and, since the kitchen was rather small, I stretched my right foot over to brace it on the side of the sink, high-heeled pump and all. That allowed William more access to the pussy, which he wasted no time digging into.

“Shit!” I shuddered when he started licking my clit. “Work that tongue, baby.”

He buried his face in my pussy and I started moving my hips back and forth like a pendulum, feeding him my ambrosia. Then I grabbed the back of his head and finally ran my fingers through
his hair, like I had been craving to do since the day I had first laid eyes on him.

I came quickly and fell back on the table, still moving my hips so he could get his fill of me. I managed to whimper, not whisper, “I want you to fuck the shit out of me.”

William stood and glanced toward the doorway again. Damn shame that I had forgotten all about Judy. There I was sucking dick and feeding her man my pussy in her kitchen, begging for a massive dick down from him. I realize that made me a stank ho, by the definition of most, but I could not help myself. I did not believe in living my life with regrets and if he was willing to give up the dick, I was willing to intake it.

“Maybe we should go to your place,” William said, obviously either feeling guilty, or nervous. It had to be nerves. Guilt would have told him to put my clothes back on. He wanted to take the sexcapade to a different location. “Judy might come up-stairs.”

“She’s knocked,” I replied and pulled him toward me by the hips. “Like you need to be knocking out the bottom of this pussy.”

The dirty talk did it. William turned into a beast; a
barbarian.
He reached down, grabbed both of my ankles, slid my ass back on the table and pushed my ankles toward both sides of my head. Then he rammed the barnacle dick all up in my snatch.

It was a shock to my system; a revelation; a freaking gift from heaven above.

William grunted and his eyes rolled back in his head. “Oh, my damn!”

I started squirming my ass around on the table. This was too much but I dared him to stop. This was the dick that I needed to reminisce about in my rocking chair;
the one.

William started grinding into me slowly … at first. It was like he was probing my pussy with a miniature flashlight. But that Maglite quickly turned into a floodlight. It was like his dick expanded once it hit my g-spot, and hit it, it did. The tip of his dick hit my “ledge” and I had to stifle a scream. I lost all control of my nervous system for about ten seconds.

“Are you okay, Marilyn?” William inquired, concerned. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Fuck … that …” I whispered. “Hurt me. Demolish this pussy like a wrecking crane.”

William truly went for broke then. He started pounding me like a jackhammer to the point that I literally almost shit on myself. Those mashed potatoes from dinner started gurgling in my stomach and I had to prairie dog them from coming out. That might sound nasty but, let’s not front, one sign of hellified, over-the-top sex is having to control your bowels like a woman has to do when she’s pushing out a seven-pound baby.

William kept it up for a good thirty minutes, the pussy probe. After a while, I almost blacked out but managed to stay coherent somehow.

Finally, I asked, “William, do you ever come?”

He grinned and kept tearing it up.

A few minutes later, he took his dick out, and I was able to exhale the breath that I had been holding in. My eyes were watery and my heart had palpitations.
It’s over, thank goodness!

Um, not!

William started pulling me off the table by my thighs.

“What the hell are you doing?” I exclaimed. “I can’t take any more.”

“You said you wanted this dick. I’m not done,” he said, the fucking barbarian.

I was like a rag doll as he turned me around, pressed my breasts and stomach down on the table and then lifted my legs up on both sides of his thighs and started fucking me with my ass and legs suspended in midair.

“Oh, hell naw!” I screamed. The dick action was too … fucking … much.

“Shh, you’ll wake her up,” William cautioned. “Let’s … get … it … in.” He thrust into me with each word.

“I can’t feel my legs,” I murmured. “I can’t feel my legs, William.”