“I glanced. I came out, didn’t I?” he said,
finally turning towards her. “I knew you were doing that for my
benefit. Bullshit, if you weren’t.”
She smiled. “You deserved it. Of course, it
was for your benefit.”
“Would you have slept with him? Just to spite
me?”
She nodded. “Yes, I would have.”
“Doesn’t seem like you.”
“Oh, Spencer, I’m thirty-two years old. I’ve
had my share of relationships, including one-nighters. I was mad.
So yeah, there was a distinct possibility that I’d have done
that.”
He was silent and frowning at her. Erica
raised up on her elbows. “That bothers you?”
“Yeah, it bothers me.”
“Why? You can have casual sex, but I can’t?
Kind of a hypocritical sexist, aren’t you?”
“You were doing it right in front of me!”
“You were being a jerk.”
“I was trying to be clear with you.”
“Clear? You were just being awful. Why can’t
you freely admit that you got freaked out because you were glad to
see me? You were glad I showed up at the bar; and you’re glad to
have me here now.”
He refused to admit anything to her so she
sighed, and sat up completely. His eyes shifted to her naked
breasts. “You never answered my question about how long it’s been
since a girl was here. Because of course, it would have to be a
girl. Someone like Tamira. Or the girls at the bar tonight. That’s
your type after all, isn’t it? Young, easy, someone with whom you
can be emotionally unavailable without complications.”
“You say it like it’s a bad thing.”
“It isn’t what I’d call a good thing.”
“Why not? I’m twenty-six. Not like I want to
get married anytime in the next decade, or two or three.”
“Then why me? Why am I here?”
“Why you?” He flipped over and sat up.
“Because… because you’re not easy, or stupid. Because you’re the
most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.”
She froze, then laughed. “You think I am?
That’s ridiculous. I was just trying to avoid cringing over what
you’d think of me.”
“God, Erica, I’ve been lusting after you
since the first time I ever saw you! Ever since I walked in when
you were with Joelle. And I was still Spike.”
She stilled. “You called me Erica.”
He laughed finally, and reached his hand out
to draw her up alongside him. “I know your name, but I didn’t want
to use it, because I didn’t want to be like this with you.”
“But you are. You are being like this with
me.” She stretched and yawned. “God, I’m tired. It’s been a long
week. A crazy week. And now I’m here. It’s weird. Strange. Don’t
you think?”
Turning over after her remark, Erica snuggled
back into him, her eyes closing. She was asleep just that
quick.
****
Spencer watched Erica sleeping from the
safety of the chair across the room. She was like a child, the way
she curled into him, and fell asleep so easily as that. And she
acted so freaking happy to be here, with him. Him! Of all people.
He didn’t get it. Or her. She just assumed she was spending the
night and never questioned it or even asked him. She just assumed
she was entitled to. But wasn’t that what he liked so much about
her? She always knew what she wanted, and expected she would be
treated and dealt with properly and how she deserved.
God, she was beautiful. Her head lay on his
pillow, the blond hair tousled around her face. Her body was naked
with the covers half twisted around her. She was like no woman he’d
ever been with. She was open, easy, honest, and responsive to
everything he did. Whether sexually, or while petting her, or
hugging or simply looking, she physically responded to him fully.
Easily. Openly. Hotly. She was far more than he ever dreamed. She
was at ease in her body, with what she wanted, and what made her
feel good. Yet, just as quickly, she assumed she was welcome to
curl up next to him. Hold him. Kiss him. Who else did that with
him? No one. No one did. Most women could read his hands-off,
screw-off, demeanor perfectly clear. But Erica completely ignored
it and did whatever she wanted.
He didn’t know what to do with her there,
since he couldn’t sleep. He didn’t go to bed this early, or this
easily. And mostly, he didn’t share his bed with anyone. Ever. But
there she was, sound asleep, curled on his bed. There, in his
house, just to be with him. Erica Heathersby, his fantasy,
hands-off, dream girl from afar, was now asleep in his bed. She
stayed. She persisted in cutting through his bullshit and lousy
attitude. Why? Why did she bother? What did she want? Sex? Sure, he
could do that for her. But even then, what did she do? She made him
look at her face. Kiss her. Fucking feel something for her.
Problem was, he wasn’t sure he possessed the
emotions to feel anything for anyone.
Chapter Fifteen
Erica woke up to a gray, quiet room. Shades
covered the windows, blocking out the morning sun. She stretched
groggily before realizing the bed wasn’t hers. Wasn’t even
familiar. She sat up. She was naked.
Spencer.
She was at
Spencer Mattox’s house. In his bed. He wasn’t there. The room was
empty. Her clothes were all picked up. They were folded, actually
perfectly folded, and sitting in a neat pile on his chair. His
clothes were gone. Huh. He was a neat freak. Who’d ever have
guessed that? Where was he?
She pushed the covers back and grabbed her
glasses, sighing happily when the world came into focus. She was
still groggy as she trudged into the bathroom. Even that was stark,
neat and clean. Well, there were worse traits in a guy, like hairy
showers or moldy toilets. Not Spencer’s. His smelled like Clorox.
Erica used the toilet, and washed her hands and face. She glanced
at her hair and found a brush in his drawer to pull the tangles
out. She had freakishly fine hair. So thin and soft, it took only
about four brushes to disentangle it. It was a pretty color and
unusual. But the texture, and the fineness didn’t excite her. She
kept it at shoulder-length, straight and soft.
She went to Spencer’s dresser and bit her lip
in amusement. His drawers were all crazily neat. Each pile of
t-shirts was folded with military precision and stacked according
to
color
. Opening the lower drawers, she found his pants as
neatly stacked and folded. It was an odd trait for the former
Spike. And it made her heart ping because he was so freaking cute,
he couldn’t begin to see it. How could something as endearing as
his crazy neatness obsession make her feel so tenderly towards
him?
She slipped on one of the t-shirts and
suspected it might have been ironed. Huh. He really was an
interesting man. The shirt came to her mid-thighs, he was so tall.
She opened the door to his room. The house sounded quiet but she
heard movements from downstairs. Coming around the kitchen corner,
she stopped dead. It wasn’t Spencer she heard; it was Rob Williams.
Rob froze when he spotted her.
Staring at her, Rob’s jaw dropped. Warmth
flooded her cheeks. She never expected to meet up with Rob
Williams, especially while nearly naked, in his house. Life sure as
hell wasn’t boring anymore.
“I thought you were Spencer.”
“You’re here still?” Rob said with so much
shock, Erica felt mildly annoyed. His mouth was still hanging
open.
“Is that so awful?”
“No. No, it’s great,” Rob said, suddenly
smiling. “You’re misinterpreting my stunned expression. It’s not
what you think, it’s seeing you are
still
here. It’s
unusual. No. No, it’s unheard of. I mean, you were really here all
night?”
Erica walked forward, feeling intrigued, but
also a little offended at the awe in Rob’s voice.
“Yes. My car didn’t clue you in?”
“Your car’s not out there.”
Erica turned, looking confused, and glanced
out the front door side window. Sure enough, her car was gone and
her keys were missing from the counter.
“Spencer’s not here either. I assumed he was
gone. I didn’t have a clue you were still here.”
Erica was perplexed. Confused. And felt
abandoned. “Where would he go?”
Rob shrugged. “So you stayed the night?”
Erica finally gave in, lulled by Rob’s sudden
curiosity. She came into the kitchen and sat down on one of the bar
stools. Rob seemed ready to leave and was filling a Thermos with
water.
“You want details?”
Rob smiled. “No. It’s just… I’ve honestly
never known one of Spencer’s, ah, you know, women, to stay
overnight.”
Erica considered that. It seemed big. Very
big in fact to Rob. Suddenly, knowing that she stayed felt big to
Erica too.
“I’m not one of Spencer’s women.”
Rob paused from screwing the lid on his
Thermos. He nodded, “I know, Doc. You’re right. That’s what is so
great. How did you do it? How did you manage to get him to let you
stay the night?”
She lowered her brows in confusion. Was it
really that shocking? “I didn’t do anything. I simply… did. I
didn’t know to ask. I didn’t know it was such a big deal. I just
assumed…”
“Well, then, he let you assume. He still let
you. It’s big, Doc. Huge.”
“Why? Why would he never invite anyone to
stay?”
Rob sighed. “He doesn’t let anyone close to
him. You’ve probably gathered that he isn’t all that easy to get to
know.”
“I gathered.”
“Yet, you’re here,” Rob said, his tone so
pleased with her, Erica felt like she’d just gotten an A on her
final exam for a class.
“I’m here. Do you think it means
something?”
Rob shot her a look. “Doc, I think it means
everything.”
Erica held Rob’s gaze and they shared smile.
“You’re not anything like I pictured.”
He picked up a sack lunch. “That’s what
happens when people get sober; they become human again. Can I ask
you something? Do you want it to mean something? With Spence, I
mean.”
Erica looked at Rob, then away. “It already
does.”
He nodded. “Good. That’s good. It’s just that
Spence isn’t easy. He isn’t going to make it easy for you.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because it’s true. But you’re here. Remember
that. With Spencer, you have to take the things that seem casual,
even easy to you, and realize they’re huge to him. And that if he
lets you be here, with him, it means everything.” Rob nodded
towards the front door. “Looks like he’s back and packing coffee. I
think he went out to get you breakfast. Yeah, never seen anything
like this from Spencer before.”
Erica turned when the front door opened, and
sure enough, Spencer came through. Dressed in black nylon shorts, a
matching t-shirt, Skechers, and a hat, he was carrying two coffee
cups and a bag as he glanced up at her. Their gazes collided, and
locked before Erica looked away, almost embarrassed by the heat and
intensity.
Spencer walked over, setting everything down.
He tossed her keys back on the counter, and glanced at Rob, then at
her.
“Am I interrupting?” he asked, frowning.
“Just wondering where you went. Coulda left a
note, jerk-off. Lady didn’t know what to think. Thought maybe you
jacked her car. Anyways, I’m off to work. See ya, Spence,” he said,
before turning to Erica. With a big smile, he took her hand and
kissed it. “Doc, I thoroughly enjoyed seeing you this morning.
Goodbye.”
Rob waved, smiling, and whistling as he
grabbed his lunch. Spencer scowled after him. Erica smiled. Rob was
devious, even downright meddlesome. He was… well, likeable,
extremely likeable, which totally surprised her, compared to the
Rob she knew after everything Joelle went through with him.
Erica was then left alone with Spencer, who
was frowning at her with a hollow-eyed expression and unwelcoming
scowl. Not exactly an
Oh honey, so glad to see you this
morning
attitude. His was more like a suggestion to leave. And
leave now.
He slid one of the coffee cups across the
counter to her. She picked it up, as the steam rose and she smelled
it. She nearly sighed, since it was her favorite.
“You got me coffee?”
He shrugged at her tone and her long look at
him. “My favorite? How did you know?”
“I’ve gotten your coffee before.”
“Nuh-uh! I only ever had…” Erica stopped
talking. She intended to say she only ever had Tamira grab her
coffee.
“Yeah, well, she passed it along to me
sometimes. That’s how we got to talking.”
And more,
but
Erica kept that snide comment to herself.
“Thank you,” Erica said finally. “What’s in
the bag.”
He pushed it towards her. Two pastries wafted
their sugary, warm scent through the paper. She sniffed. “Even
better. But you didn’t have to.”
“We didn’t have anything to eat.”
“Oh. Well, still.” Erica took a bite. It
tasted better than it smelled. She looked up to find Spencer
watching her. What? Why did he do that? He was watching her as if
she were an anomaly and he didn’t know what she might do next. She
pushed the bag towards him. “Aren’t you going to have one? Oh wait.
You don’t eat. That’s why you look like that, and I look like
this.”
He opened the bag, and took the pastry out,
all the while holding her gaze. “I eat. I bought it, didn’t I? And
you, you should keep doing whatever makes you look like that.”
Quiet descended between them as they both
chewed. She drank to hide her unease and looked everywhere else,
but towards him. He seemed to keep watching her. What was this?
What where they? Friends? Lovers? Nothing? Everything? She couldn’t
get a read on Spencer. Not even a hint.
He waved towards her and said suddenly, “You
probably shouldn’t run around my house in only a t-shirt. Might
have been someone besides Rob you ran into this morning.”
“I thought it was you down here. I didn’t
give a thought to Rob.”