A Cry For Hope (9 page)

“Hi, Jenny!” my mom said to the pretty brunette that walked through the door. “Wait till you see that cake!”

“Oh, Mary, right now, that is the only good thing that I’ve heard today.”

“What’s the matter, honey?” my mom asked.

“Well, my florist messed up my flowers, and my photographer is in the hospital having an emergency appendectomy as we speak. So it looks like I will be carrying daises instead of tulips, but it’s not like anyone will remember anyway because I won’t have anyone to take the pictures.”

“Oh, Jenny, I’m so sorry,” my mother said, looking like she was deep in thought. “Hey, wait a minute. My daughter is a great photographer.”

Oh no, she didn’t!
Assisting a
real
photographer with studio shots and taking landscape pictures hardly qualified me for being responsible for capturing the intimate moments of what would be one of the most important days of this girl’s life. I didn’t want to turn around. Instead, I kept my back turned, restocking the cookie trays, hoping that this girl wouldn’t take her seriously.

“Hope,” my mother said.

“Yeah?” I finally turned around, acting as if I didn’t hear the conversation that had just taken place.

“This is Jenny. She’s getting married on Saturday and doesn’t have a photographer. I was just telling her that you are a great one.”

I hated to disappoint this poor girl whose smile was a mile wide. “Oh, believe me, I don’t consider myself a photographer by any stretch -.”

“Please,” the girl pleaded with a look of torment in her eyes.

“I just don’t want you to be disappointed. I mean, this is going to be one of the biggest days of your life.”

“I’m sure I won’t be. If Mary recommends you, I’m sure you’re great! I can write you out a check right now.”

“Oh no, let’s wait until
after
you see the pictures to make sure that you’re happy with them.”

“No, I insist that I give you a deposit up front. Fair is fair. You’re giving up your Saturday at the last minute to accommodate me.” She handed me a piece of paper with the time and place of the ceremony, along with three hundred dollars. “I’ll see you Saturday, Hope!” she said with a smile, then thanked my mother and walked out the door.

“Oh, my god, I cannot even believe that you did that! I don’t even have my camera with me!”

“Well, you have it at home, don’t you?”

Home.
 
I now had to go back to that place and face the man who had been consuming my every thought.

She was just about to say something when Nick walked through the door. “Hey there, Nick. Where’s your dad?” my mom asked, sounding a little disappointed.

“Oh, he’s pulling out what little hair he has left, trying to do the end-of-month report so he asked me to do the dessert order.

“Hey, Hope, are you free for dinner tonight?” he asked, while my mom went in the back to get her order sheet.

“Oh no, Nick, I’m not. My mom is making homemade pizza and I’ve already postponed it once,” I joked. He chuckled, but I could still see disappointment in his eyes. “Hey, why don’t you come over my mom’s for dinner?” I turned around when I heard her coming out from the back. “And why don’t you ask your dad if he wants to come over, too?”

Suddenly, my mother’s ears perked up. “Come over where?” she asked.

“Nick is coming over for pizza tonight and he’s bringing his dad,” I said before Nick had a chance to respond.

“Oh?” Her eyes widened.

“Yes, we’re going to celebrate you finding me that photography job,” I said, sarcastically, raising my eyebrows and smirking.

She just shook her head and smirked back, mouthing the word
Brat
to me. “I’d love to have you and your dad over, Nick.”

“Okay. What time?” he asked.

“Six.”

Nick nodded. “Hey, Hope, you got a minute?”

“Do I have a minute, Mom?” I asked, with a hint of sarcasm.

“Yes, actually, you can have twenty,” she joked.

I took off my apron and followed him out the door. We took a seat on the empty bench, just outside of the bakery. Nick didn’t look himself. I could tell that something was bothering him. “What’s the matter?” I asked.

He handed me an unopened envelope. “It’s a letter from Angie. I got it today and I don’t want to open it.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m afraid of what it says.”

“Oh, Nick, don’t be afraid. If you guys are going to try and move ahead, you have to know what’s in that letter.”

“Open it and read it to me. I can’t do it. Please.”

“Are you sure?” I asked.

He nodded. I carefully opened the envelope and unfolded the piece of stationery containing the most perfect handwriting. “Ready?” I asked. He closed his eyes and nodded. I took a deep breath and began to read aloud:

Dear Nick,

I’m not going to lie and tell you that I’m not angry at you for doing what you did because I am. As I sit here writing you this letter, we should be exchanging our vows. I don’t know why you did this and I wish that you felt comfortable enough to tell me the reason. Then, maybe, I wouldn’t be as mad. Despite this, I still love you with all my heart and if something is bothering you, I want to know so that I can help you fix it. I realize that you may need time so I will not contact you. If you need or want to get in touch with me, you know where I am. I just hope that someday you will be able to open up to me and tell me why. I will love you forever.

~ Angie

He put his head down and rubbed his temples. “This really sucks.”

“Nick, you need to call her, text her, something to let her know that you’re still thinking about her and that you still care.”

“I’m not ready to face her yet, Hope.”

“That’s okay, but just let her know that you haven’t given up.”

He jumped when his cell phone began to ring. “My dad,” he said, looking at the caller ID.

“Yeah, Dad?” he answered. “Okay…Yup, I will. Oh, we’re going over to Hope’s mom’s house for dinner. Okay?...I’ll see ya’ in a few.”  He quickly hung up and we both began to laugh. “Gopher boy has to run to the store and get him ink for his printer,” he said, standing up.

I used my hand to block out the bright sunlight as I looked up at him. “Are you going to be okay?” I asked as I gave the letter back. He nodded. “Good, and remember. Let her know, even if it’s just a quick hello text. Trust me, it will mean a lot!” He smiled in appreciation. “See you tonight, Nick.”

“See ya’.” He waved goodbye and headed back to his car.

I sat on the bench and watched people. It was a beautiful spring day. The elementary school across the street was just getting out. I watched as the mothers waited anxiously for their babies to emerge from their classrooms so that they could hear about their day. Just last year, I was one of those moms. Now here I was, watching a memory of what was once my life. I could see my Charlie’s smile perfectly in my mind when he would see me waiting for him, his backpack would be half-zipped and would be hanging over his shoulder. His shirt was always un-tucked and wrinkled, looking completely disheveled but absolutely adorable. I closed my eyes, wanting to retain that memory for the rest of my life.

I got out of my car when I saw the droves of kids piling out the door. I crossed the street, saying hello to some of the other moms that were standing around, waiting. I smiled when I saw Charlie approaching me. He looked like he had a hard day. His blond hair was disheveled, his shoes were untied, and he had a tear on the knee of his pants.

“What happened to you?” I asked.

“Football game at recess until Mr. Jacobs made us stop. He said we were getting too rough.”

“Well, by the looks of it, I’d say he was right.” I held his hand as we crossed the street. We got into the car and I looked in the rearview mirror to make sure he was buckling himself up. “Grocery store, rent a movie, and pick up a pizza.” Charlie gave me a thumbs up. This was our normal Friday routine.

“Is Daddy going to be home?”

“Yup, his flight should be landing in five minutes. So he should be home in an hour or so.” Jamie had been in Cincinnati on business for the past four days. We missed him like crazy when he was gone.

We arrived at the grocery store. I dug through my purse for my ringing cell phone just as we were about to enter. I smiled when I saw that it was Jamie. “Hey, you! Are you on your way home?” I answered, trying to maneuver the cart while holding my phone.

“My flight got delayed. Not another one going out until tomorrow.”

“You’re kidding!” I said, disappointed.

He began to laugh. “I’m on my way home now. I should be there in about forty-five minutes.”

“Good. Charlie and I should be there soon, too. I missed you,” I said.

“Oh, yeah? Are you gonna show me how much you did later on tonight?”

A smile stretched across my face. “I just might. We shall see,” I teased.

“Hey, is Charlie right there?” he asked.

“Yup, we’re at the grocery store.”

“Let me talk to him.”

I handed Charlie the phone. “Hi, Dad! Are you home yet?”  We walked up and down the aisles as I listened to Charlie’s one-sided conversation. He would respond with a
yeah, no,
and an occasional
cool.
“Okay, I love you, too,” he finally said, hanging up.

“Daddy got me a Cincinnati Reds baseball hat right from their stadium,” he said, handing me back my phone.

“He did?! Awesome,” I replied as I looked over the yogurt, trying to find the one and only flavor that Charlie would eat. He was such a picky eater so once I knew he liked something, I made sure that I stocked up on it.

“Hello, Charlie!” I turned around to find Charlie's teacher approaching us.

“Oh, hi, Mrs. Carver!” I said, smiling. I just loved this woman. She was so warm and caring, exactly what you would expect from a teacher. Of course, the fact that she reminded me so much of my mother had a lot to do with it, too.

“Hi, Mrs. Carver.” Charlie smiled.

“I just sent you an email before I left school today,” she said.

“Oh?”

She must have seen the look of concern on my face. “Oh, it's nothing bad. Actually, it's quite good.”

“Mom, can I go see Sam?” Charlie asked, looking up at me. Sam was the older man that worked in the bakery. Charlie would visit him each time we came to the store while sampling the goodies that he would give him.

“Yes, I'll be right there.”  I watched as he walked the three feet to the bakery counter and began his usual conversation with Sam. I turned my attention back to his teacher.

“The email was a forwarded message from Luke Bryant's mother. I don't know if Charlie has told you about Luke or not?”

“Oh yeah, he did. He wants me to set up a play date with him.”

Mrs. Carver smiled. “Well, Luke just moved here a month ago. He's special needs and you wouldn't believe how mean some kids can be, even in second grade.”

“Oh no, please tell me Charlie isn't -.”

She immediately shook her head. “No, no, no! Just the opposite. He’s taken Luke under his wing. He partners up with him and includes him in all the activities at recess. And because of Charlie, the other kids are accepting him much better. He’s quite the leader.” She smiled over at Charlie, who was sampling what looked like a cupcake. “The email was from Luke's mother, expressing her gratitude to you and your husband for raising such a nice boy. I told her that I would make sure you received it.”

Hearing this meant more to me than anything in the world. Charlie was such a good boy and to know that he was demonstrating the values that Jamie and I had been instilling in him since birth made me smile. “Well, you just made my weekend,” I said.

“He's a great kid,” she said.

“Thanks!” I smiled.

“You have a great weekend and I'll see you next week at the Spring Fling,” Mrs. Carver said.

“You, too!” I said as pushed my cart into the bakery section to see what sugary concoction Sam was giving to Charlie today.

“Hey, Mommy.” He smiled up at me with chocolate smeared on his nose.

“Oh, my goodness. Look at you!” I laughed.

“That's my special triple chocolate peanut butter cupcake.” Sam smiled from behind the counter. “My man Charlie gave it a thumbs up!”

“I bet he did!” I grabbed a tissue from my purse and wiped his face.

I leaned down and kissed him on the cheek. He smiled up at me. “Hey, what was that for?” he asked.

“No reason. Just wanted to let you know that I love you and I’m so proud of you.”

“Hmmm…how much do you love me?” He flashed me his adorable grin.

“Lots!” I said.

“Enough to let me have another cupcake?”

“Nice try, mister!” I said, messing up his hair and leading him away from the bakery.