A Dinner Of Herbs (45 page)

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where her cheeks were still wet. And he wondered how he was going to face the wide

world after these

few days spent with her in this room.

But face it he must, and gather up strength for what was to come when he arrived.

“It’s a good job you got the letter off yesterday,” he said.

“It would leave on the mail coach from Newcastle round half-past nine. I think that’s the time it goes.

Something more than a day and a half I reckon it takes. He could be here within four

days.”

The spoon half-way to her mouth, she stopped her hand, saying, “That’s if he leaves right away.”

“Aye, yes, as you say, if he leaves right away.”

He could not prevent himself now from asking the question that was rampant in his mind:

“What’s goin’

to happen when you do see him?”

She put the spoon of porridge twice more into her mouth before laying the plate aside on the settle, and

then she said quietly, “That remains to be seen.”

After Mrs. Patterson had finished laying out Kate she took a seat by the fire and in a tone that held some

reprimand, she said, “It’s usual to have a drop of something’ in at a time like this, a drop of spirit;

if not, ale of some kind. As I said, ‘tis usual. But then you’re young and not as yet used to death.

That’ll come though with time. Still, I thought Kate, even with her potions, would have held a little bit

aside. She wasn’t above a drop years ago when it flowed freely. I know that. “

Apologetically, Mary Ellen said, “There ... there was some brandy, but we had to give it to Hal.”

“Oh, aye, aye. That’s another thing: he’s on his feet now and able to move; I think it would be wise if he

got himself away back to his farm, ‘cos people talk you know. Oh aye, people talk. He

could have

been near dead when they brought him in, but that was some days ago.

You don’t want to get a name like another Maggie Oates, now do you? “

Mary Ellen swung round ready to yell her protest at this gossiping old woman, but

knowing that she was

under an obligation to her, all she could say was, “Oh, Mrs. Patterson.”

“Aye, well, lass, I’m only speakin’ for your own good;

you can’t stop people’s tongues. And you’ve got to admit, since Kate put you on to this potion and

herb business there’s been more men here than there’s been at Maggie “Mrs. Patterson,

what you hintin’

at? You know it isn’t true, none of it.”

“Oh, lass, you needn’t start an’ bubble. As I say, I’m only speakin’ for your own good.

“Cos you got your name up with one, you don’t want to have it with another. And he’s

got his name up

already, has Hal, encouragin’ that Annie Gordon to make a fool of herself. Comin’ over here every day

with food for him. They say she’s never off his doorstep and her with whiskers on her

chin. Eeh! What

some women will do for a man. If they only knew what it was all about afore they started, they’d run the

other way. By God! they would. Anyway, I’m off now and perhaps you don’t know it

but..

well.Ichargeashillin’forlayin’ and getting’ rid of the muck.”

Mary Ellen closed her eyes for a moment before going to the mantelpiece, from where

she took down

the box and, taking out a shilling, she handed it to the older woman.

Looking at it in the palm of her hand, Mrs. Patterson said, “Aye, well, nothing under, nothing over, I

suppose,” and without further words picked up her shawl from the back of the chair and went out.

Mary Ellen lowered herself slowly down on to the settle and she folded her arms tightly across her

breasts and leant her head back against the wooden support as if she was resisting some force, which

indeed she was, for she wanted to shout out her protests against the gossiping tongues.

Even when she

told herself to remember that everybody wasn’t like Mrs. Patterson, that there were

kindly women

hereabouts and that many of them had come to the door to enquire after both Kate and

her, she still

knew it just needed a woman like Mrs. Patterson to start a rumour and even the nice ones would say:

Well, there’s never smoke without fire.

What was she going to do now? Kate gone and she here on her own. And every time Hal

entered the

door she’d be conscious that someone had seen him, and that they were all putting two

and two

together. And there would be no doubt that after a while other men would come knocking at the door

supposedly for potions, and definitely after dark.

There was a way out, but she couldn’t bring herself to take it: that kind of thing had to come from the

man, because men being what they were, even the best of them, if you made the first step they would

hold it against you forever after. Look what had happened with Roddy.

She had made the first step there all right, hadn’t she? Rushed in with both feet, and arms outstretched,

and he had flown. Twas no use telling herself that he had been on the point of flying in any case.

What had happened that night had scared him so much that he had made every excuse not

to come

back. So that’s what would happen, she supposed, even in a minor way to any woman

who made the

first move.

No, whatever was to happen between her and Hal had to come from him;

she couldn’t make herself cheap again.

She had opened the doors and windows to let the air sweep out the smell of death. There had been

many visitors during the day, both men and women. They had stood by the bed looking

down on the face

that had already changed colour and was in sharp contrast with the white linen rag

strapped underneath

the chin and around the head.

The doctor, too, had called, and he had spoken so kindly of the woman who had

seemingly not had a

good word for him.

“She was clever,” he had said; ‘in her own way she was a very clever woman. “ Then he

had sniffed as

he walked down the room, saying now, “ She’ll have to be boxed and buried as soon as

possible.

You’d do well to leave the doors open during the day while the weather’s fine. But a

couple of nights

closed up. well’—he spread out his hands ‘the smell would get worse. Have you

instructed the

carpenter? “

“Yes, yes. Hal’s seen to it.”

“Amazing fella that.” He had shaken his head.

“I never expected to hear him breathe again. Did you?”

“No, no, I didn’t, but I hoped.”

As he went out of the cottage he turned and said to her, “There’s a rumour going around that the

Bannamans have flown. They were living in a house outside Corbridge and the last that

was heard of

them was they had taken a coach southwards.”

“Well, as long as they have gone, that’s all that matters I think.

Although I feel they should be brought to justice. “

“You’re not the only one who feels that. And it could come about yet.

Goodbye, Mary Ellen. “

“Goodbye, doctor,” she said.

“And thank you.... Hal had left about noon for the farm and he did not return until it was nearly dark.

“How are you?” he said.

“I’m all right. How are you?”

He pressed his lips tight for a moment while shaking his head; then he said, “I’m mad

about the latest

news.”

“You mean about the Bannamans leavin’?”

“Oh, I knew about them leavin’ days ago, but it’s just been discovered they’ve taken a boat to

America.”

“No!”

“Aye. Her and her mother and her brother, goin’ to the mother’s cousin or somebody out there.”

“Can the justices not do anything now?”

“I ... Iidon’t think they’ll bother. If I had died, aye, perhaps; but, as the constable who brought me the

news said this mornin’, I’m on me pins and as good as ever I was that’s all he knows.—

so I don’t think

they’ll take any further steps. But oh, by God!”—he ground his teeth together and

thumped one fist into

the palm of the other’1 would just like to come face to face with that one just once more.

You

know’—he turned and looked at her“I never believed in devils, or heaven or hell afore, but now I believe

in both devils and hell, because she’s a devil an’ she put me through hell. Heaven? Well, I won’t know

anythin’ about that, I don’t think ever. But the other two, aye. Oh aye.” He stopped now and looked

up towards the bed, saying, “I saw Bill Powell on me way here. He’s had a word with the doctor. He’s

boxing her in the mornin’. The doctor thinks she should be buried the morrow or the next day at the

latest.

“Cos you can’t stand this.” His nose wrinkled.

“It isn’t so bad when I’m upstairs,” she said.

“No, but it is when I’m down here.”

She stared at him.

“But... but you’re goin’ home.”

“No, I’m not, I’m not leavin’ you with that; she’s not Kate any more.

Kate’s gone wherever good people like Kate go to. But what’s left, that’s something’

else. “

“Hal’—her voice was low ‘you’d better not stay. I’ll ... I’ll be all right. I’ll be quite all right. I’d... I’d

rather you went.”

“Oh aye. Mrs. Patterson been here? Of course she has. Oh, Mary Ellen, don’t worry your head. I

know what they’re sayin’ and you know what they’re sayin’. Well, let them say. When

they’re talkin’

about us they’re givin’ somebody else a rest, eh? Now, I don’t like eating in here;

let’s go in the scullery. And bring the hairn. Oh, and of course’ he nodded down to the dog ‘you go

without sayin’, don’t you, old fellow? “ He patted the animal’s head, then pressed it

against his knee for

a moment.

The act of affection made Mary Ellen blink her eyelids and say, “Tis a pity he can’t

speak, isn’t it?”

“Oh, I don’t know so much about that. He’s got a language all his own and it’s very

understandable.

Haven you, old boy?” He again patted the dog’s head, then said, “Well, come on, let’s get movin’. I’m

hungry, and Annie’s made a nice pie. Oh, by the way’—he chuckled now—’you’ll never

believe this,

but I had a visit from her father this afternoon. You know what he asked me?”

They were in the scullery now standing one each side of the small table set against the wall opposite the

stone sink. And now there was a rumble in his stomach and his head moved from side to

side before he

added, “He wanted to know what my intentions were towards his daughter. He’s barmy,

quite barmy.

No wonder the lasses are odd and his wife scared out of her wits. He talked of

recompense. Did you

ever hear anything like it? Recompense! He said he’d be losing a good worker. He said

she was as

good as a right-hand man.”

His shoulders were shaking when she asked, “What did you say to him?”

“I told him to get the hell out of it, but that if Annie wanted to come and work for me she was welcome,

and that I’d take her on me payroll. Me payroll!” He snorted:

“One ten-year-old and Boyo here, me payroll. But I was so bloody wild I told him some

home-truths: I

told him he was an old fellow and he would soon kick the bucket, but his daughters and his wife weren’t

half his age, and when he went, just think of what they’d do with that farm. And if I could advise them,

I’d tell them to sell up the damn lot and give themselves the time of their lives. You know, I thought he

was gona have a seizure on the spot. But he never said another word an’ off he went. But did you

ever?”—he brought his head forward towards her—”Annie and me! Seriously, Annie and

me.”

She stared at him, saying quietly, “You could do worse, I suppose.”

“Aye.” He stared back at her.

“Aye, you’re right. I could do much worse, and I could do better, much better. But there

—’ He turned

to the table and unwrapped the pie, saying finally, “ But you can’t have all you want in life. The quicker

you learn that, the easier life will be. Aye, the easier it’ll be. “

They had to bury Kate on the Monday. Those men not on their shift attended the funeral, and others

whose pains she had alleviated over the years came too, and the women from the

surrounding cottages

followed the cart carrying the plain coffin on which were small bunches of late

primroses, cowslips and

bluebells.

Hal walked alongside Mary Ellen, behind the cart, which provided food for comment

later in the inn. He

should have walked with the men, it was said, or she with the women.

It was a long walk into Haydon Bridge, but the day was bright, even warm. And after the coffin had

been laid in the waiting grave most of the mourners turned away, leaving only Hal and

Mary Ellen and the

doctor who had joined the cortege at the cemetery gate.

The three stood until the grave-diggers had finished their work; then Mary Ellen placed the flowers in a

row down the mound. Her face was twitching as she turned away and joined Hal, who

walked stiffly

with his head bent. At the gate Mary Ellen said goodbye to the doctor and thanked him

for all his

attention; then she paid the carter who was still waiting, and her eyes travelled to the group of men

standing to one side of the road and the group of women at the other; and she looked at Hal enquiringly

and he said, “I’ll take the men for a drink, you go along with the women. Annie will have got the table

ready.”

Without further words they moved away from each other and she joined the women.