A Fractured Light (10 page)

Chapter 12

I
woke up to the sound of thunder. It ricocheted off the walls and shook the floor, so loud it felt like it was coming from inside my head rather than from outside. I pulled on dark skinny jeans, rain boots, and a lightweight sweater, and headed downstairs. The weather had been unpredictable since I’d been back, right along with my erratic moods. Yesterday it had been snowing, and today it was pouring. Once I learned to control my powers, maybe I’d be able to control what kind of weather I inflicted on people. I’d have to work on that.

Ardith met me at the door with an umbrella. “I can’t do anything about this rain,” she said, frowning. “You are more powerful than you even know. Give me your keys. I’ll drive. You concentrate on aiming the lightning away from us. Sound good?”

I grinned. “Okay,” I said. I was glad to see her. It was nice to have a reminder that this wasn’t in my head.

The drive was treacherous, with actual zigzags of lightning touching down around the car. Thunderstorms were one of my favorite things, and I remembered as a kid going camping with Aunt Jo, the terrified elation of running to shelter to avoid getting hit by a flash. This morning I leaned my forehead against the window on the passenger side and watched the light streak across the sky. I tried to do what I had done with the clouds. It was like painting with my mind, as several bolts flashed and then swirled up, back into the clouds, before they ever hit the ground.

Ardith let out a low whistle. “Asher was right,” she said.

“About what?” I asked. “What did he say?”

She glanced sideways at me. “He really believes you can do this. That you’re stronger than all of us. He thinks you’re going to change things. He’s so happy you’re on our side. Whatever comes.” She smiled warmly. “We both are.”

“He told you that?”

“We’ve known each other a long time. We don’t always have to say things out loud to know what the other is thinking.”

“Do you . . . ?” I started to say. “I mean, have you ever . . . ?” I deflected a flash of lightning from hitting the car, sending it spiraling back into the sky.

“Do I love him? No.” She laughed softly. Something in me relaxed a little. “My heart will always belong to another.”

“Oh.” I paused, trying to remember what I had overheard back at the cabin while I’d supposedly been unconscious. “Is it . . . Gideon?”

Glancing at me, she nodded slightly, then gazed back out the windshield.

“What happened?” I asked. I knew I shouldn’t overstep my careful friendship with Ardith, but I had to know. “And why did we need him specifically for this mission?”

Ardith took a deep breath. The sky churned with phosphorescent light. “When your parents fell in love and were cast to Earth,” she began, “it was the start of a great Truce. There was a tenuous peace for a long time, a balance between the Order and the Rebellion.”

“Right,” I said.

“But before that, we were at war. That’s why we’re so afraid of what is coming. Because we’ve seen the violence that can erupt between the sides when that balance shifts. And it’s never shifted like this.” She looked at me, then looked away. “The war was vicious and lasted for millennia. I was taken by the Order before I even knew what had happened. I was with Asher, and he—he only looked away for a second, but it was one second that counted. I can’t say he’s ever quite forgiven himself for it.”

I didn’t say anything. I didn’t know what to say. I just continued to stare out the window, sending bolts of lightning back into the wild morning.

“Gideon came after me,” Ardith continued. “We were young and in love. He thought he was invincible. But they caught him. They tortured him, used all kinds of mental tricks, manipulations. They wanted Asher. But Gideon wouldn’t give in. He wouldn’t sell out his friend.”

“He must be so strong,” I murmured.

“He was there for a long time.” Ardith nodded to herself, and for a moment it seemed like she’d forgotten I was there, so completely was she brought back to the memory. “I don’t know how long in human time, because that’s not how things work for us. They kept us apart. Eventually he learned their ways—and taught himself to fight back. He beat them at their own game and escaped. He saved me. But it took such a toll on him.”

We were pulling up toward school. The rain had slowed to a drizzle, the thunder and lightning more sporadic.

“It had been so long since we’d been together,” Ardith continued. Kids were getting out of cars, slamming doors, calling to their friends. I felt a million miles away. “And he’d changed,” she said. “He was distracted and moody. Sometimes he would vanish in the middle of a conversation, go somewhere far-off, as if his mind wasn’t truly there.” She paused. “Someday I am determined to make it up to him and prove that I am as devoted to him as he is to me.” She took a deep breath. “But it’s so hard, Skye. That’s the kind of test you hope you never have to face. I could never love anyone else while Gideon is still alive.”

We pulled into a parking space, and Ardith cut the engine. I didn’t want to get out of the car.

“That’s why we need him,” I said quietly. “He’s the only Rebel who knows how to fight their mental influence.”

Ardith turned to me and nodded. “Not even Oriax could.”

“You’ll find a way to show you love him,” I said, putting my hand on hers. “I know it.”

She looked into my eyes, and her smiled was tinged with sadness. “You are going to save all of us,” she said. “You’re going to destroy the Order. You’ll make them pay.”

Ardith got out of the car, and I followed. I wanted to be the heroine that they thought I could be. But I felt so far from being ready to fight.

Ardith tossed me back my keys and started for the front archway.

“Asher thinks it’s his fault, you know,” she said, turning around. “That he let Devin hurt you. He let something like that happen once before. He can’t believe he let it happen again.”

“That’s why he’s so intense about protecting me.” It made sense now. The worried looks. The fierce insistence that I join the Rebellion. The white feather, crumpled in his fist.

Ardith nodded. “Just so you know where he’s coming from. How serious he is.”

A lump formed in my throat. I needed to find a way to let him know it wasn’t his fault. I was grateful for the Rebellion’s protection. But I needed to protect myself.

Homeroom was tense. Devin didn’t look at me, and Asher’s arm around my shoulders was tighter than it had been the day before. Now I understood why. I couldn’t help but look at him in a new way.

When the bell rang, Ms. Manning pulled me aside to let me know I could meet my new tutor after lunch in the library. I glanced over to where Devin had been sitting, but he was already gone. Rather than the twinge of sadness I might have felt the day before, I just felt anger. The Order were monsters if they were willing to use torture to win a war. And the Guardians were just their mindless, soulless puppets. That’s all Devin was. If I hadn’t understood it before, I did now.

When I walked into the library later that afternoon, another blond kid was sitting in his place. I’d seen him before, with the group of Guardians. My pulse sped up, but I had to remind myself what Asher had said: They’d never do anything out in the open. School is the safest place to be.
No matter that Raven had implied otherwise.

I walked toward him.

“Hi,” he said. “Skye? Ms. Manning said you needed someone to catch you up on your homework?”

“Yes,” I said, sitting down. “Thanks.” He opened his notebook, and we started with English. I glanced at him over my textbook. He didn’t seem like a Guardian. He seemed normal. Nice, even. And he was
really
smart.

I was so confused.

It’s only a matter of time
, the notebook had said.

What were they planning?

My body ached to run. To get better, stronger. Protect myself. It was all I could think about.

After school, I was loading books into my locker, fantasizing about the run I was about to take, when Cassie hobbled over to me. Ian wasn’t far behind, carrying her books.

“So,” she said, “I’m thinking Bean. I’m thinking free chai lattes courtesy of everyone’s favorite barista. I’m thinking disaster-movie marathon, your place. Thoughts? Comments? Questions?”

“Still grounded.” I shrugged. “But Friday night, it’s on. Okay?”

Cassie pouted. “Fine. Man, Aunt Jo is really taking this hard, isn’t she?”

I thought about her coldness toward Asher and the general mood around the house.

“Yeah,” I said. “She’s not happy.”

“Well, give it time,” Cassie said. “She loves you. She’s just glad you’re back, that’s all.”

I hoped that was it.

As soon as I was home, it was school clothes off, running clothes on. I was itching to get out and pound through the trails. The morning’s storm had cleared up with my mood, and the air was fresh and clean.

I raced up a different trail this time, feeling the earth crunch beneath my feet, the wind whip at my face. The remaining raindrops on the branches twinkled around me, scattering with each new breeze and falling into my eyes. I felt even more connected than the day before. As I snaked up the path, trees moved, their roots untangling from the earth and then retrenching again in my wake. Branches bowed to let me pass. I was a part of the natural world, working in tandem with it and yet controlling it, too. It was exhilarating and strange.

The end of the trail opened into a clearing at the base of the woods. The sky was beginning to grow too dark for me to continue back through the heavy brush, so instead of doubling back through the trees, I jogged out onto the road. As I ran along, I created a tiny bright ball of fire in my hands, setting it free to guide me in the darkness.

I was just rounding a curve when I heard a staccato noise behind me, growing louder. I sped up, and the noise behind me sped up, too. My body jolted into high alert.

I’m being followed.

Dusk had settled along the tree-lined road. With the orb of light to guide me, I was fine as long as the true darkness held off until I got home. But it also meant that my pursuer had an easy way to track me. Spring was nearing, but it wasn’t here yet, and I knew that as soon as the sun set completely, the freezing cold night would fall over the mountains. On the silent road, something crunched on the gravel behind me. I whipped around, my hands raised to throw fire or wind or sleet or whatever I needed to protect myself. I was pretty sure my practice would pay off.

Between my outstretched fingertips, I could just make out a face. Devin’s. Our eyes met in the dusk. My body went cold.

“Don’t,” he called. “Don’t attack.”

“What do you want?” A familiar voice cut in from behind me. I turned to see Gideon. There was a hollow toughness to his eyes, and anyone could tell from looking at him now that he’d been in some difficult battles before. “Get away from her,” he growled. “Leave her alone. Haven’t you done enough?”

“She doesn’t need you to fight her battles,” Devin said calmly, his absolute tranquility radiating to me from where he stood. I began to let my hands fall to my sides. The calming shift in mood seemed to have no effect on Gideon.

“Did you hear me?” Gideon barked. “Leave her
alone
. She doesn’t want you anywhere near her. I can’t stand to look at you.”

Devin looked at me—as if he was asking a question of me with his eyes. As if he expected me to understand what he was thinking. The look in his eyes was almost pleading.
What?
I wanted to say. No, I wanted to scream it.
What do you want?
But I kept silent, tried to look stony even though I was torn up inside. He didn’t get to ask me questions. He didn’t deserve my sympathy.

When he realized I wasn’t going to say another word, he glanced over my shoulder at Gideon. Then he set his jaw, turned, and in a flash of white feathers, he was gone.

“Are you okay?” Gideon asked. His face seemed flushed in the dusk, and his dark hair was wild, as if he’d been running—or flying. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” I said. “He was following me. That’s all.” Even though it was the truth, I realized there was a defensive note in my voice—like I was trying to protect Devin. Gideon frowned. He’d seemed so sweet and laid-back at school—but there was no mercy in his eyes tonight.

“Probably trying to shake you up, make you feel vulnerable.” He nodded to himself. “He wants to get back on your good side. So he doesn’t attack just yet. He doesn’t come off as a threat right away.”

I shivered. “You really think that’s what he’s doing?”

“He’s trying to make you think he’s asking forgiveness. I’ve seen it happen before. You’re too smart to fall for that.”

Am I?
I wondered. If Gideon hadn’t come along, would I have caved and let Devin talk? Would I have been powerless to his calming presence? Devin and I had spent so much time together. He had helped me so much, believed I could be the warrior he knew I was deep down. He’d pushed me harder than anyone had ever pushed me before. I’d felt so close to him, and when we were both able to break down each other’s walls, it came as just as much a shock to him as it did to me.