A Fractured Light (15 page)

Chapter 18

C
assie had outdone herself. Love the Bean was decked out for the ME show—but not in her signature fairy-tale twinkle lights. It felt darker somehow. Everything had a kind of edge to it. There was a lot of black. “She’s still working through the accident,” Dan said as Asher and I walked up. “It’s some pretty dark stuff.”

Ian had rigged a ramp to the stage, and Cassie hobbled to the microphone on her crutches. The Bean was filling up, and the Mysterious Ellipses began to warm up with an instrumental version of the theme song from Super Mario Brothers. It was secretly a little fun to see how Cassie worked her outfits around her cast. Tonight she wore a black, stretchy knit miniskirt with one cobalt-blue tight and her signature ankle bootie on one leg, the darker blue cast on the other. A few long drapey tank tops finished the look.

Behind her, the band paused.

Cassie grabbed the mic, and we cheered loudly.

“Go, Cass!” I shouted.

“Oh, thank you, thanks, guys,” she said with the fakest modesty I’d ever seen. Dan and I shared a look and laughed. “No, please, stop. Thank you for coming out tonight. We’ve been working on some new stuff, and it’s a little different than usual. I hope you like it.”

“We already love it!” Dan shouted.

“I hope those of you who aren’t my
boyfriend
like it.” Cassie grinned at the crowd. Trey, the ME drummer, counted off on his drumsticks, and then the band burst into their first song. The crowd fell to a hush. Cassie was mesmerizing to watch.

Dan was right—the music was way darker than it ever had been before. A thumping bass line kept the rhythm, and Cassie’s voice was a low growl.

Then the rhythm picked up, and she started singing faster, wilder. We were all hooked, moving in time to the music. Her voice rose to a high, sharp clarity. She sounded like wind chimes on speed. Whatever dark issues Cassie was still working through, it was doing wonders for her music.

It was the best the Mysterious Ellipses had ever played. We danced crazily, like the end of the world was coming and we had to let loose one last time before it did. What only Asher and I knew, though, was that it might. Soon. And that I was the one who might have to bring it.

Ardith and Gideon walked in, their faces serious. Ardith wore another long skirt that swept the floor, heavy boots, and an armful of gold bangles. Gideon wore jeans and a faded Rolling Stones T-shirt under a corduroy blazer. They looked so unassuming, like kids I might go to school with—but I couldn’t help feeling nervous as they scanned the Bean, as if looking for trouble. When they spotted Asher, he stopped dancing and stood straighter. “Be right back,” he muttered.

My heart beat fast as I turned around to face the stage. Was something happening? I tried to listen to the music but kept sneaking glances at the back of the room, where the three of them had their heads bent in serious conversation. Not one of them looked up at me. I turned my attention back to the stage.

“Man, I missed her,” I said to Dan.

“She missed you, too,” he said. “You know, she was really torn up about it.”

“I just want things to go back to normal between us.”

“Then you may have to tell her the real reason why you left,” he said, turning to me.

“I—I didn’t—there’s nothing—” I sputtered. Of all the people in my life, somehow, in that moment I remembered why Dan was my oldest friend. He didn’t talk much, but when he did, he meant every word.

“Skye,” he said. “You were acting strange long before you left. You don’t think we know something’s going on with you? All she wants is for you to tell her the truth.”

“I did tell her the truth,” I lied. Dan looked at me pointedly.

“Give me some credit.”

I swallowed. “You don’t want to know the truth, too?”

“I know you’ll tell me when you’re ready. I don’t need everything right this minute like Cassie does. You’ve been my friend since kindergarten. I’m not afraid of you abandoning us. But Cassie—you know her, everything is drama, drama, drama.” He rolled his eyes, but he said it with love. “She needs to be reminded sometimes that you’re her best friend.”

I looked around. The Bean was packed. People were dancing, music was playing—and there were, I was sure, Guardians everywhere. Across the room, where he was busy ringing up someone’s coffee, Ian glanced up and met my eye, frowning slightly. I turned to Dan. “Will you believe me when I say that I want to tell you, I just can’t right now?”

“Look, are you in trouble?” he asked. “Because telling me will help. We’ll get you help, Skye, whatever you need.”

“No,” I said. “But I may need your help later. Will you promise to help me?” I knew I was asking a lot of him. Dan couldn’t possibly know that “help” might mean slashing at celestial beings with angelic swords or standing back as I lobbed a fireball at someone who was trying to kill me. But I knew that I would one day—soon—need his help. And Cassie’s and Ian’s. Even if it was just understanding when I needed to make a choice once and for all about what my future held.

“Of course I promise,” he said. “I’ve got your back, Skye. Worry not.” And somehow, just these words helped to ease some of my constant fear.

I glanced back at the bar, where Ian was counting change for someone. He looked up at me again, and this time he cocked his head to one side. He didn’t look angry, more like he was lost in thought. It struck me that he was always watching. Always tentatively observing me when he thought no one else was looking. I’d always thought, somewhat sheepishly, that he’d just been checking me out. But there was something else going on right now that made me wonder. . . .

Dan slapped his hand on my back and set off to maneuver his way to the front of the stage.
My friends aren’t mad at me
, I realized.
They’re worried about me.
I decided to go apologize to Ian. He didn’t deserve the way I’d treated him. I didn’t think I’d ever led him on, but somehow he’d never stopped believing that we might end up together.
He should go out with Ellie
, I thought.
He should give someone else a real chance.

I made my way through the crowd. Ian was wiping off the counter and bouncing along to the music. When he noticed me coming, he tried to back away into the supply closet, but he knocked into a broom and it clattered to the floor. He rushed to pick it up.

“Hey,” I said, hopping up onto the counter.

“Hmm? Oh, hi.” He averted his eyes.

“Look,” I said. “I think you should date Ellie. She’s a really good skier. And . . .” I tried to think of more compliments. “She’s pretty, in kind of, like, an obvious sort of way, and—”

“Skye,” Ian interrupted. “You suck at this.”

“I mean it,” I insisted. “I think you should date her. I’m not mad. I’m happy for you.”

He stopped nervously wiping down the counter and looked up at me. “This is it, huh?” he said. “There really is no chance you secretly love me, is there?”

“I’m so sorry, Ian.”

“It’s cool,” he said. “Ellie’s a good kisser.”

“I’m not really asking for details here, okay?”

“Yeah,” he said, grinning shyly. “Okay.”

As I started to jump off the counter, Asher sauntered up. “Hey,” Asher said, nodding. “Two lattes.” He slapped a ten-dollar bill on the counter. Ian gave Asher a look that could kill. I knew the two of them didn’t exactly love each other, but I’d never seen Ian look at him like this. He started turning toward the steamer, then stopped and doubled back. A smirk played on Asher’s lips as he waited to see what kind of new amusing challenge Ian would bring.

“Skye may be into you or whatever,” Ian said coldly, the ten slowly crumpling in his fist. “But it doesn’t mean I’ll ever stop hating you.” He glanced at me, his eyebrows knotting. Then he went to get us the lattes.

“Why do you do that to him?” I asked, turning on Asher. “Stop smiling like that. It’s so mean.”

“I don’t like the way he looks at you,” Asher said. “Like he thinks he’s got you all figured out or something.” But something in my gut told me that wasn’t what was going on here. Ian
hated
Asher—and not in a jealous way, the way I felt about Ellie. It had nothing to do with the fact that I loved Asher instead of him. He would have disliked anyone I dated, but his hatred of Asher was
specific
.

Strange
, I thought. Asher was so charming. He came across as a little cocky sometimes, but underneath it all, when we were alone together, no one I knew had a better or a stronger heart. I didn’t know why Ian couldn’t trust my judgment more. Or Aunt Jo—who seemed to seethe with dislike for Asher, too. Dislike—or maybe even distrust. Ian and Aunt Jo were two of the people I cared about most in this world. How could they both hate Asher so much? What was the connection there? What was I missing?

What had he done to make them turn against him?

“Thanks for the latte,” I said.

“Don’t mention it.” He handed it to me and didn’t remove his hand right away. I tried to take it from him, but he held on tight. When I looked up, I realized he wasn’t looking at me. He was staring over my shoulder. I followed his gaze.

Guardians. A whole group of them had just walked in from the cold, their glossy blond hair glinting menacingly in the light of the coffee shop. Across the room, Gideon and Ardith looked up, too, their gazes steely and cold. An invisible fist clenched my throat. Asher had said they would never do anything out in the open—but did that mean Love the Bean was safe, too? I wasn’t so sure. They moved as a group, fluid, seamless, and calm.

The bell on the door rattled, and Raven walked in behind them—followed, seconds later, by Devin. She looked around appraisingly, and slipped her arm into his, as if everyone in the room wanted him.

Not everyone.

His eyes met mine—piercing, blue, and impossible to read. I looked back at Asher. Pure, unadulterated hatred burned across his face.

“They wouldn’t do anything,” I said. “Right? Not here, in the open like this?”

“Not if I can help it.” He strode across the room, Ardith and Gideon falling into formation behind him. The Guardians tensed and strengthened their stance. Onstage, Cassie was still singing. Her voice cut across the room, an eerie soundtrack to what was starting to take place. I stood by the counter, watching, wondering how, or when, I would need to act.

Before Asher and the Rebels reached the group of Guardians, Ian swooped in.

“Hey,” he said, holding out both hands like a traffic cop. “Hey, hey. Be cool.”

“We’re fine,” Lucas, who was at the head of the Guardian group, said. He raised his hands in protest. “These guys look like they want to start something.” He gestured at Asher. “Not us.”

“I don’t care,” Ian said. Onstage, the band had stopped playing. Cassie was gaping at the scene in front of her. “But you need to stop. Okay?”

Asher took a step backward. “We’re fine, too,” he said. His black eyes were searing. “Forget it.”

Feedback split from the amp behind Cassie, cutting into the hushed crowd as she took the mic. “Is this a bad time to let you all know about the party?” she asked sweetly.

But I didn’t hear how people responded. I was falling, fast and hard, hitting the floor as the room faded away to someplace else.

The mist cleared away on the wind, and I was standing on the beach again. The waves crashed stormily against the rocks, breaking with a vengeance and slipping away with the tide. I was trudging through the surf. The hem of my beautiful dress was soaked and dirty. In places, I noticed now with a sinking sense of dread, it was streaked with red.

Blood.

Ahead of me, I could make out a crumpled shape on the shore, dark and still. As I drew closer, I saw that it was a body.

Which one of them did I hit?

I opened my eyes, gasping.

Chapter 19

L
ove the Bean was strangely quiet, and something feathery and light tickled my forehead. As my vision came into focus, I realized it was wisps of reddish blond hair. Cassie’s green eyes were staring into mine. When I tried to sit up, she pulled back.

“You’re awake!” she said breathlessly. “Are you okay? You fell hard.”

“Who says you have to look before you leap?” I said in a weak attempt at a joke.

Cassie smirked. “I made them all leave.” She helped me up and guided me over to the faded velvet couch. “I told them to go on ahead to Foster’s Woods. Are you sure you’re okay?” She held my hand in hers and brushed the hair back from my face. The gesture was so maternal, so caring, that I leaned into her, and she put her arm around me.

“I missed you so much, Cass,” I said. “You have no idea.”

“Aw,” she said. “I missed you, too, buddy. You’re my bestest. You always will be, no matter how many guys you run away with.”

I felt a pang in my heart at her words. I had to tell her.

“Cass, I—”

“Shh. I’m only kidding. Come on. Want some water?”

I shook my head. “I think I just want to go to the party.”

“Sure,” she said. “Let’s go.”

Foster’s Woods was up past Cassie’s place. There was an empty field a few miles back from the road, and everybody parked their cars there, trekking out to the woods beyond.

It was the perfect place for covert partying. Someone had built a roaring campfire in the fire pit. Its orange glow flickered between the trees.

We found Dan and Ian stoking the fire.

“You feeling okay?” Ian asked, that inquisitive look in his eyes again. “Has that been happening a lot?”

“Maybe you should go to a doctor, Skye,” offered Cassie. “Get it checked out. I’ll go with you if you want.”

I wished I could tell them it wasn’t something that a doctor could fix.

“I’m fine,” I said. “I’ve just been eating differently lately. I think it’s affecting my blood sugar or something.”

“Okay,” said Cassie dubiously. “But for real, though, the minute you want to go to a doctor, just say the word.”

I smiled at her. “I will. You’ll be the first person I call.” I scanned the dark woods around us. “Have you seen Asher?”

“I think he went off that way,” Cassie said. “With Ardith and Gideon.” She grinned mischievously and whispered, “If I wasn’t, like, in love with Dan or whatever, I would so go for Gid. He is
cute
. Very my type, don’t you think?”

“You can put the girl in a relationship . . . ,” I began, putting my arm around her.

“But you can’t take the boy-crazy out of the girl,” Cassie finished.

“Would you kill me if I looked for Asher?” I asked.

“Nah, go ahead. I’ll hang with the boys. Boys!” she called.

I walked off in the other direction, through the low tangle of trees. I was partly looking for Asher, but the truth was that I needed some time by myself, to think. My mind was racing.

The vision I’d just had haunted me. What had I meant when I thought,
Which one of them did I hit
? Whose body was it? Why was I having such strange and violent visions? They swirled into one another in my head, and I couldn’t figure out how they fit together. The visions of Devin, of opening the shoe box in Aunt Jo’s closet, of trudging down the beach in a bloodstained dress—what did they all mean? Were they connected somehow? If they were, it was in ways I couldn’t fathom.

“You look lost in thought,” Ardith said gently, her gold bangles jangling softly as she came up behind me. “Can I help?”

“Not unless you can make sure nothing will happen to Cassie if I tell her the truth,” I replied.

“I wish I could. I can see how badly you want to. But you know it’s too dangerous, right?”

“Yeah,” I said. “I just miss talking to her. She’s shockingly clear-headed sometimes. She always helps me put things in perspective.”

“You can talk to me, you know,” Ardith said warmly. “Anytime you need a friend.”

I turned to her, unable to stop the swell of gratefulness from bubbling up within me. The orange light flickered across her face.

“You have no idea how much I needed to hear that,” I said, breathing a sigh of relief.

“You know you don’t need to worry about Asher or his feelings for you.” I lifted my eyes. “Asher’s a difficult creature,” Ardith continued. He has been living for much longer than you have. But I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you.”

“You haven’t?”

“Never.” She smiled. “I don’t know how, but you tamed him. I think he’d spend another thousand years by your side if he could.”

I let the words sink in as the firelight cast strange shadows on the trees and across our faces.

“I’ll let you get back to your thoughts,” she said, and before I could say anything more, she hugged me and left.

I was so grateful to have at least one person in my life who knew exactly what I was going through.

I wound my way back through the trees, searching for Asher, wondering if what Ardith had said was true. The flames cast shadows of branches and leaves across the people appearing and disappearing among the trees. It was hard to see who anyone was in the uneven light. As I stumbled over roots and stones back toward the bonfire, I heard two voices speaking in hushed tones on the other side of a tree. I was about to walk in the other direction when I realized one of the voices belonged to Gideon—and I stopped.

I heard my name.

I drew closer to the tree, making sure to stay hidden behind it.

“I’ve just talked to her.” Ardith’s voice slipped out of the darkness. “She really does love him. I’ve told her he feels the same.”

“I don’t know,” said Gideon. “I still think she’s a liability. You’ve seen the way she and that Guardian look at each other.”

“They can hardly stand to be in the same room.”

“Asher says they still talk in secret. He says she used to have feelings for him, that if she knew what we were planning, she’d never let us go through with it.”

What?

“Skye feels betrayed,” Gideon continued, lowering his voice. “Don’t you think he’s playing to that weakness? Killing her obviously didn’t work, and now they’re realizing you trap more flies with honey than you do by stabbing them.”

I heard Ardith sigh. “Do you think he’s manipulating her mind?”

“It’s possible,” said Gideon. “We need her to get those powers under control, fast. The Guardians are getting restless. They want a fight.”

Was it possible they didn’t care about my safety at all? That they just wanted to use me?

“Asher says to give it a little more time. He hasn’t decided what to do just yet. He’s afraid that if he goes through with it . . . she’ll never forgive him.”

I stifled a sharp breath and stayed hidden in the shadows.

“But how could she still even consider aligning herself with the Order?” Ardith sounded shocked.

“Asher’s convinced Devin’s influencing how she feels. She’s not strong enough to fight him yet.”

“You have to train her harder. Prevent that from happening. We need her on our side, Gid, and you’re the only one who can help her to prevent Devin from getting in. If the Order claims her, they’ll destroy us.”

“I know. And if we keep her—”

“We destroy the Order.”

“She’s the ultimate weapon.”

My mind was racing. I hadn’t told Asher I’d talked to Devin—but either he was more aware of my feelings than I’d thought or someone had told him.

Suddenly I felt racked with guilt. What was I doing? Of course the Rebellion could trust me—I would never fight against them. But I knew I could never let them hurt Devin. I just couldn’t.

He was so much more helpless than I was—he had no free will.

I thought I’d known where I truly belonged, but now, suddenly, I wasn’t sure of anything anymore.

My back stiffened. Nobody was going to use me in this war. I needed to understand my Guardian powers as well as my Rebel ones. I was beginning to think that the clue to everything lay in my visions. The gift from my mother.

“Hey,” said a familiar voice. I whipped around, startled, to find Asher. Had he been behind me this whole time? I hadn’t heard him approach. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you. Are you okay?”

In the flickering light, his face looked menacing, strange. Not like the Asher I knew at all. I thought about what I’d just heard.

How well did I really know him?