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Authors: Kimberly Rose Johnson

BOOK: A Holiday Proposal
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Holly plunked down on a bench and began pulling off her skates.

He slid to a stop and stepped off the ice. He went down on one knee in front of her and tenderly held her wrists away from her skates. “Hey. Are you sure you’re okay?”

She dipped her chin lower and sniffed.

He slowly released his hold on her wrists and sat beside her.

“You are so sweet.” She wet her lips. “That day changed my life. I have so many regrets. Thank you for caring so much. It really means a lot to me.” Her words were clear, but wobbly.

He reached for her hand, and when she didn’t pull away, he breathed a little easier. “I know it’s hard to talk about, but maybe you’ll feel better if you do.”

“You’re probably right, but I wish you didn’t know. I wish no one did.” She turned her head and met his eyes. “I’m curious about one thing. Jessica said April was clueless about what happened. How did you find out?”

“John is friends with the baby’s brother.”

“But Sean was an only child.” Her brows drew together as she processed the news.

He rubbed his thumb across the top of her hand.

Confusion covered her face. “They had another baby? But that must have been years after. I was told they couldn’t have more children. I don’t understand.”

Matthew kept his voice low. “They adopted—another boy. He’s the same age as John.”

She sniffed and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “I’m so sick of crying. It seems to be all I do lately. But at least these are happy tears. That is wonderful news. I’m so pleased they adopted.”

He searched his pockets for a tissue and came up empty. The snack bar had a napkin holder. “Be right back.” He strode the few feet to the counter and pulled out a couple of napkins. Seconds later he thrust them into Holly’s hand. “Here.”

She dried her eyes and then looked up. “Thanks. I’m relieved to know they have another child. It makes sense they’d adopt an older one. They were probably afraid to risk SIDS again with a baby.”

He caught and held her gaze. “God doesn’t want you to hold on to this guilt. He doesn’t want you to punish yourself forever, especially for something you had no control over.” He cleared his throat. “I hope you don’t mind, but when I found out about what happened, I scoured scripture hoping to find something to help. I think Ecclesiastes chapter three will put things into perspective. Verse one says, ‘There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.’ Then in Psalms 33:18 it says, ‘The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.’” He reached for her hand. “Don’t you see? Your season for mourning that baby and feeling guilty needs to end. Let God heal your crushed spirit. God has so much more for you, but you are so busy running from your past you aren’t enjoying what He’s given you now.”

Holly teared up again. “Thank you, Matthew.” She sniffed and rested her head on his shoulder. “I think God is trying to tell me something. First through Jessica and now you. I’ll work on letting go. I think I’m almost there. Old habits are hard to break, and I’ve been holding on to this guilt for a long time.”

“Let Him have it, Holly. He loves you and wants to free you from this burden. And He wants you to move forward.”

She bit her bottom lip and nodded.

He pulled her into a hug and rested his chin on the top of her head, wishing he could kiss her but knowing now was not the right time. He’d said all he could. The rest was up to her.

Chapter 17

H
olly stepped aside as several shoppers exited Keira’s candy shop. She crossed the threshold into the warm store and inhaled the scent of fine-quality chocolate.

“This is a surprise.” Keira raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah. Could you sneak away for a bit? Maybe give me some advice.”

“I wish. It’s so busy today, and I’m on my own.”

“Oh. I understand.”

The bells on the door jangled, and a cool gust of air blew in along with two chattering women.

“Hi, Susan.” Holly straightened her shoulders. Maybe her other friend would have time for a visit.

“Hey, sweetie.” Susan gave Holly a side hug. “Look who I found on my way in.”

The brunette woman who had entered behind Susan removed her hood.

“It’s Meghan, right?” Holly asked.

“Yes, and you’re the one who captured the runaway dog.” Meghan unbuttoned her coat.

“That would be me.”

“I can’t thank you enough. You really saved me that day. How’s your handsome man doing?”

Holly’s face heated, and she avoided all of her friends’ eyes. “He’s great. Thanks for asking.”

“Glad to hear it. If anything changes between the two of you, send him my way.” She waggled her eyebrows and chuckled. “Just kidding. Although I have set up a couple of friends lately.”

Keira and Susan groaned, effectively cutting her off.

“What?” Meghan held a hand to her chest. “I think I make a good matchmaker.”

“Please, Meghan.” Keira rolled her eyes. “Stick to focusing on the animals.”

Meghan looked at Keira as if she’d lost her mind. “They don’t need a matchmaker.”

Holly grinned.

Meghan shook her head. “Never mind. I’m here for a chocolate fix. Dr. Harding has neglected to bring chocolates to the clinic this season.”

Keira
tsked
. “Sounds like I need to have a word with my husband.” She pulled out a large box and filled it with random chocolates. “On the house, Meghan. I can’t believe Pete forgot to bring in chocolates.”

She waved a hand. “He’s been busy. Rumor has it he’s buying into the veterinary practice, fifty-fifty.”

Keira shrugged but offered no comment.

Meghan wiggled her fingers and tucked the box under her arm as she headed toward the door. “Thanks for the chocolates. Ta-ta.”

Holly turned to Keira. “She cracks me up. I can’t imagine how Pete deals with all her energy.”

Keira shook her head. “She’s good at her job and respects his space.”

“Makes sense.” Holly regarded Susan. “You have a few minutes? I could use some advice.”

“I always have time for you.”

“Great! See you later, Keira. If you get too busy down here, give me a call and I’ll help.”

“That won’t be necessary, but thanks for offering.” Keira waved and turned to the door as a new customer walked in.

Holly slipped up the stairs with Susan at her heels. She pushed into her apartment and plopped down on the sofa.

“What’s going on?” Susan sat, then tucked a leg under herself.

“It’s about Matthew. You remember who he is, right?”

“Of course. He’s a little hard to forget with his Nordic good looks.”

“Hey, you’re married. Remember?” Holly tossed an accent pillow at her friend.

Susan snagged it and propped it behind her back. “Doesn’t mean my eyes don’t work. What’s the problem?”

“I
really
like him—a lot.” Holly’s cheeks warmed. “He makes my heart go pitter-patter whenever I see him, but I don’t know what to do.”

“Does he like you?”

“Yes. I’m sure he does.”

“Then tell him how you feel.”

“But I’m scared. What if I open my heart to him only to have it not work out between us?”

Susan raised a hand with a smirk. “Funny, I remember having a very similar conversation with you this past summer. Do you remember what you said to me then?”

Holly drew a blank and shook her head.

“You said life is filled with what-ifs and that I needed to decide if opening my heart was worth the risk.”

“Hmm. That sounded much better when it was me giving the advice.”

“There are no guarantees in life, Holly. I suggest you pray and ask God what He thinks. If He gives you the okay to have a relationship with Matthew, then go for it.”

“Good advice. I should’ve thought of that myself.”

“Ah, don’t feel bad. Sometimes the answer is so obvious it’s impossible to see.”

“When did you become so wise?” Holly appreciated her friend now more than ever.

“It must be married life and being a big sister to Katie.”

Holly leaned forward at the mention of Blake’s sweet sister. She really liked that kid. “How is Katie doing?”

“Fantastic. A new
Pepper’s Adventures
was released last month, and she and Blake are working on the next book in the series.”

“I need to get a copy. It seems like yesterday I was helping them brainstorm their Christmas book.” Holly stood and moved toward the kitchen. “Can I get you anything?”

“No, thanks.” Susan pushed to her feet. “I was stopping in for a box of chocolates, too, so I guess I should head back downstairs.” She waved as she closed the door.

Holly grabbed a bottled coffee from the fridge then returned to the sofa and rested her head back, shutting her eyes.

Lord, you know how much I’m growing to care for Matthew. He is the first man who has stirred my heart like this. He makes me want to be a better version of myself. What should I do?

Peace settled over her, and she took a steady breath, basking in the calm sense of God’s presence. She had her answer.

* * *

Matthew rolled dough in a fury. Of all the days for George to be sick and his counter help to have car problems. The village was filled to capacity with pastry-loving tourists, and he couldn’t move fast enough to get the dough prepared to bake. At least April agreed to help. Of course, that left Ava in need of a sitter. He glanced toward his niece, who sang Christmas songs at the corner table while coloring. That worked for now, but once they opened she’d need supervision.

April pulled a batch of snickerdoodles from the oven and slid in a pan of sugar cookies. “Any idea who we can ask to watch Ava for the day?”

“Not a clue. It’s times like these I really miss Mom and Dad. I could ask Holly.” The idea made him weak. How would she feel about babysitting after what happened when she was a teen? Of course, Ava wasn’t an infant. And Holly had saved Ava’s life. He sighed. They were supposed to go skiing later today, and now he’d have to cancel. Well, he was the one who said he didn’t have time for a relationship, and this proved the point. He wiped flour from his hands and reached for the phone. “Here goes nothing.”

“You’re going to call
this
early?” April shook her head. “We want her to say yes, not hang up on you.”

“It’s almost six-thirty. I’m sure she’s awake.”

“It’s Saturday.”

He put the phone back on the receiver. “Okay, what do you suggest? I open at seven. I wish George had called last night, then I would’ve come in early to bake and been able to run the counter like I used to do.”

April cast him a look that suggested she understood his frustration. “What’s done is done. Go ahead, call her. You’ve got nothing to lose. If she isn’t available I’ll have to take Ava home, and you’ll have to wing it alone.” She frowned. “I know it’s not going to be easy, but this place gets too busy for a three-year-old to be on her own. I’d like to trust my fellow humans, but I can’t.” She shrugged.

“I understand.” Matthew’s stomach sank. His first Christmas in business, and the weekend’s success depended on whether Holly would babysit—not good. He grasped the phone and dialed.

“Hello.” Holly’s muffled voice answered on the fourth ring.

“Hey, it’s me.”

“Matthew?”

“Yeah. I’m really sorry to wake you, but I’ve run into a snag. George is sick, and I have to do all the baking myself this morning. April is here to man the ovens and the counter, but we need someone to keep an eye on Ava until my salesgirl can get a ride. She promised to be here by noon. Any chance you could help out until then?”

Silence.

“Holly?”

“I’m here. Just thinking. Give me thirty minutes, and I’ll be there. I take it we aren’t skiing today.”

“No. I wish we could. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it. Staying toasty inside sounds nice. I’d better hang up so I can get ready.”

Matthew put the phone down and scrubbed his hands.

“Well?” April stood at the counter frosting cookies.

“She’ll be here around seven.”

“Whew. I think we’re going to be ready for customers by then, also. You’re amazing.”

“Thanks, but there’s no way I could’ve done it without you manning the ovens and decorating the cookies. I appreciate it.”

“That’s what sisters are for.”

Matthew worked at frenetic speed in silence for the next thirty minutes until, promptly at seven, a knock on his back door startled him. He met April’s eyes.

“I’ll take care of it. Keep working. It’s probably Holly.”

He nodded, but kept his ears tuned. A moment later he heard Holly’s voice.

“Morning!” Holly walked into the kitchen wearing a smile and holding a mug.

“We have coffee here.”

“I couldn’t wait. But I’ll take another cup before Ava and I head out.”

April thrust a box into her hands. “Cinnamon rolls. A small thank-you for helping.”

Matthew grinned. “She likes the snickerdoodles. Toss in a few of those, too.”

Holly laughed. “Please don’t. I’ll get a sugar high. I can’t resist this stuff. Any suggestions on what I should do with Ava today?”

April added the cookies anyway and handed her a list. “This is her normal schedule. If you stick to it, the time should flow well.” She moved around the counter to where Ava colored. “Holly is here to spend the morning with you.”

Ava studied Holly. Matthew held his breath. She didn’t know Holly well and had yet to warm up to her, as his sister liked to say.

“I not want to go.”

Holly squatted to Ava’s level. “We can watch Christmas movies.”

“No.” Tears welled up in her eyes. “I want Mommy.” She jumped up and ran to April.

Holly stood and looked to him. “Plan B? I worked at Keira’s candy store, and she’s always been pleased. Maybe I could do whatever April intended to do.”

April beamed a smile. “Perfect!” She spent the next few minutes giving Holly a crash course on the register and the serving procedures, then scampered out the back door with Ava in tow just as the first customer walked in.

A burst of cool air followed the woman and her children inside. Matthew returned to the kitchen. He didn’t have time to pay attention to what was going on up front. Another hour and they’d be set for the day with baked goods. He kept his ears tuned for anything unusual.

Somehow they survived the morning. Livy, Matthew’s regular front-counter person, showed up at noon and took over. Holly was a trouper, filling in the way she had, and he was drawn to her even more. She’d done an incredible job and fit in as though she’d worked there forever.

The door to the kitchen swung open, and Holly walked in. “Hey, boss, mind if I sit?”

He snickered and motioned to the stool by the phone hanging on the wall. “Thanks for what you did today, and knock off the boss bit.”

Holly saluted him. “You’re welcome...boss.” She pursed her lips together, holding in a chuckle. “It was kind of fun and a nice change of pace.” She opened the box his sister had given her earlier. Drawing in a deep breath, she closed her eyes and licked her lips. “Even though I told her not to give me any cookies, I’m glad she did. I’ve wanted to sink my teeth into one of these all morning.” She pulled a snickerdoodle from the box and broke off a piece.

Holly’s hands were shaking. Matthew’s heart sank. She must have skipped breakfast to get here so fast. When would she learn to take care of herself? He quickly wiped down the counter then filled the sink with hot, soapy water. “I’ll be done in a jiffy. Want to grab a bite to eat? My treat.”

“Sounds good to me.” She reached for another cookie and flashed a smile that sent a zip of pleasure up his spine. He made quick work of the dishes, then headed up front. A steady stream of customers came in and out, but he felt confident the bakery was well stocked for the day. “I’ll be back in an hour. You have everything under control?”

“Sure.” Livy didn’t spare him a glance while she pulled a Danish from the display case.

He found Holly waiting by the back door. He shrugged into his jacket, and they walked outside. Tiny flecks dropped softly from the sky.

“Good thing it’s snowing again. The tourists expect it this time of year.”

“Yeah, and it’s beautiful at night when all the lights come on.” He stuffed his hands deep into his jacket pockets, but everything within him wanted to take her hand in his.

“Where should we go?”

“The Gingerbread House?”

Holly gave him a saucy grin. “Is that the only place in town you go? Besides, I’ve been smelling sugar all morning. How about Gustav’s?”

“Okay.” Matthew kept pace with Holly, matching her rapid steps. “Have you given any thought to what I said the other day?”

“Yes.” She gave him a slow nod. “I have, and your words really helped. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” He nudged her shoulder with his. “Want to hit the ice rink some evening next week? I probably won’t be able to escape the bakery long enough to make good on skiing until after Christmas.”

“Sure. Sounds like fun. I’m not much of a skier, anyway.”

“Now you tell me. You were the one who originally suggested it.”

“I know. I enjoy skiing, but I’m not good at it.”

He nodded. “Are you much of a skater?”

“I can hold my own.”

He pulled the restaurant door open and the hostess promptly seated them at a corner table with a view of Front Street. The noise around them filtered away as if they were the only two people in the room.

“What are you having?” He set the menu aside.

“Soup and salad.”

“Girlie food. How about a juicy burger with the works?”

Holly quirked a grin. “And what’s wrong with girlie food?”

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