A House of Cards: Deconstructing Ethan (6 page)

“I…I don’t know if I can do that.” I stammered, beginning to panic. At brunch, I would be surrounded by my parents’ friends, people that had known me before my life went to hell. They were the people that knew all of my sordid secrets.

“Please E.J., nearly everyone is out of town this weekend, it will be very small. I…I haven’t seen you in so long,” she nearly begged, still holding onto my hand. I looked up to Jayden and Lexi for support, but this was ultimately my decision. I took a deep breath.

“Okay, Mom.” I answered, not meeting her eye.

“Thank you,” she said and leaned forward very slowly, as if not to startle me, and kissed me on the cheek. “Come around noon and we can talk for a while, just the two of us, before anyone arrives. If you don’t feel comfortable, you can leave whenever you want. Okay?” I nodded, resigned to the fact that I would be going back to my boyhood home and see my father again. Therapeutic or not, I really didn’t want to engage every ghost from my past in the same week, but perhaps in the long run it was easier than prolonging the inevitable.

Her face clouded over and she looked pensive, like she was struggling with some deep seated emotion. Finally, her face cleared and she suddenly looked determined. “I love you, Ethan,” she said, opening her arms to me just like when I had been a boy. Slowly, I stepped forward and hugged her. While it felt nice, warm and comforting in the way only a mother’s hug can be, it didn’t feel exactly the same as it had when I was a child. My mother’s love was like a repressed memory. Turning my head, I kissed her lightly on the cheek.

“I love you too, mom.” I whispered into her hair.

Journal Entry: Facing my Demons

Why had I agreed to go to brunch at my parents’ house? Why? I don’t like people. Even my parents aren’t all that fond of me. Last, but certainly not least, I’ll be shoe-horned back into Ethan Hughes. I haven’t been Ethan Hughes in so long; I don’t even know who he is anymore. I can’t concentrate, and I’m starting to panic at the thought of backyard brunch with the canapés, the false kindness and the frenzied rush to leave so you can talk behind other peoples’ backs. And I know exactly what they’ll be talking about after this luncheon.

The freak they thought themselves all rid of.

I closed the journal, unable to concentrate on writing, when my mind was racing and I felt so disjointed. I…I needed something to help me regain control. Walking down stairs, I saw Jayden and Lexi alone in the kitchen. As Lexi was finishing up the dishes, Jayden sat at the table cutting lengths of what looked like clothesline rope. They both looked up as I entered and Lexi gave me a wide smile.

“How’s the writing coming?” Jayden asked with interest. Placing the knife he had been using on the table, he began to coil up the rope, but when I didn’t answer right away, he looked up atme. I saw his face go from a smile to a look of concern in an instant. After being friends for so long, he read me very well. “Sit with me, Ethan.” He pulled out the chair next to him and I sat down, staring at the table until I felt his hand on my knee, rubbing it reassuringly.

“If you are that worried about the thing at your parents’, don’t go,” he suggested, “You can see them another time. I think it’s selfish of your mother to invite you….no, guilt you….into going to a brunch with people you don’t want to see.” His face hardened and his concern touched me. Stopping his gesture, he held my hand for a few minutes while we said nothing.

Lexi came over to the table, not commenting on our show of affection, but simply ran her fingers through my hair. I found it calming and I closed my eyes to her touch. If this was what it was to have friends who cared about me, I was grateful. I didn’t feel alone anymore, instead I felt cared for, nurtured.

“Jayden and I are going to have a session with Connor in a few minutes. Would you like to come up with us?” Lexi asked tentatively. I looked up at her, surprised they wanted to include me in their session with their sub. Jayden was nodding so they must have talked about the possibility already, they may have even talked to Connor about it. Looking at Jayden, he answered my silent question.

“Yes, we’ve talked about it. That type of relationship is something that helps you to stay in control. We knew that there would come a time when we would ask you to join in. Connor had agreed, although perhaps a little nervous. So, this first time, when you’re in the room you can work with Lexi or me. One of us can sub for you or… you can sub for me, depending on what you’re looking for,” he explained. His offer left my head spinning, he wanted to sub for me or me sub for him? I sat back and thought about what I wanted. I had been in control of our relationship for so long, was that how I wanted things to continue? Would it help me more to relinquish that control to someone I trusted, like Jayden? I didn’t really want to answer that question at that moment. There were too many variables and I still felt out of control.

“Um…Could I just watch this time?” I suggested, not wanting to play Dom or sub with him today. It had been months since I had any kind of interaction of that type. The memory of our last time together was still fresh and raw in my mind, not knowing what kind of emotions might be drawn to the surface if I made myself vulnerable to him in that way.

“Sure, Ethan," Jayden said smiling. We made our way upstairs to the playroom and when I saw the overhead light, I reminded myself to tell him about the soundproofing once we were done. Upon entering the room, I saw Connor immediately. Quietly on his knees, on what looked like a yoga pad in the center of the room. Honestly, I liked the change it made from my own playroom. Lexi and Jayden were good to Connor or they left him in this position for extended periods of time.

Jayden nodded to the leather winged back chair to his left and I went to sit down. The chair indicated that they anticipated an audience when they worked with their sub, which intrigued me, wanted to make sure to stay out of their way and this location would give me a good vantage point. While Jayden and Lexi set up for their scene, Connor continued to look at a fixed spot on the floor. Connor was tall and lean with chin length curly brown hair and a sculpted body. Appearing to be in his late teens or very early twenties, the grace and dignity in which he held his position was impressive, given his young age and relative inexperience. They had done well with him and I felt a certain pride in that.

It seemed that Lexi would be in charge of the scene, under Jayden’s direction, because Jayden was simply helping set things up while she removed her clothing. Under the jeans and t-shirt, she had entered the room in a red leather bra and panties set. She was beautiful and glorious. Standing before the boy, she put her finger under his chin and he looked up at her with reverence.

“Do you remember what you learned from our last session, Connor?” She asked sternly and he nodded. “Answer me properly,” she nearly growled

“Yes, Mistress Lexi,” he replied obediently, trying not to look at me in his humiliation. It was apparent that he did not like being naked in front of me, perhaps even resenting Jayden and Lexi for sharing him with me. While I had no intention of touching him, it was amusing to watch him squirm.

“And do you remember that you have a punishment due this session because your tender skin earned you a reprieve last time?” She reminded him with a smirk.

“Yes, Mistress,” he said solemnly.

“Good,” she said turning around to look behind her, “follow me.” She walked over to a medium-sized padded table and Connor followed, crawling on his hands and knees. Since he was crawling away from me, I had a perfect view of his sweet little ass as it flexed with every movement. The shadow of his soft heavy balls shifted slightly between his muscular legs. If he had spread them just a little further, I’d have been able to see his tight hole, the one I hoped was going to be used thoroughly. “Stand,” she commanded and he stood up and she pushed him forward over the long edge of the table.

“Mistress, I….” he started, but then stopped immediately.

“What, Connor?” she asked, but he just shook his head.

“Spread your legs,” she instructed and he moved his feet apart slowly. “Wider. Yes, like that,” she indicated when his thighs tensed with the effort of standing with such a wide stance. Kneeling next to him, she tied his ankle to one leg of the table, then moved to the other side and did the same until he was spread, naked and vulnerable. Around the other side of the table, she looped another length of rope; the same rope Jayden had been cutting downstairs, around his wrists. Affixing it to a metal d-ring embedded in the floor, the boy was immobilized.

“That’s my good boy.” She ran her hand slowly up the back of one thigh, then the other. He moaned softly as she rubbed his buttocks. “Do you like that?”

“Yes, Mistress.”

Putting his forehead on the table, I knew he was doing everything he could to avoid looking at me. Lexi went over to Jayden who handed her a wide leather paddle, a beginner instrument. I’d have been worried if they had opted for a cane or even a strap. At least the boy was going to get off easy by having Lexi paddle him instead of Jayden. As Lexi swung back to give him his first blow with the paddle, I started to become aroused. When it struck his tender skin and he cried out, I realized that he wasn’t getting a reprieve at all. Lexi wielded that paddle just as hard as any man. Getting up from the chair, I looked at Jayden, he nodded. Walking around to the other side of the table, I was able to see his anguish more clearly. His cries were more pronounced as the paddle struck him again and again. Lexi stopped and he lifted his head to look at her with his tear-streaked face and a vulnerability that struck a chord in me. Unpretentious and unassuming, he lay naked across the table, beautiful in his subservience. I found myself wanting to run my fingers through his long hair to comfort him, but that wasn’t my role there.

Jayden, who was barefoot and wearing a pair of faded jeans, which were open, came forward and stood before Connor, putting his fingers in Connor’s hair, he pulled his head up. “Open,” he demanded sternly before sliding his hard cock into the boy’s mouth. “That’s it…You like that don’t you, boy?” Connor moaned and Jayden pushed deeper into his throat. “Lick the head...” Jayden said, and his head fell back in pure pleasure as the boy complied with his demand. “Fuck, you’re getting so good, Connor. You please your Master.” As Jayden pumped his hips faster, I noticed Lexi go over to the back counter and pick up a plastic vibrator and lube before returning to Connor.

He whimpered softly around Jayden’s cock as Lexi prepared him and then inserted the vibrator deep into his tender little ass. Stopping, she waited for him to adjust to the size of the toy before turning it on. When I looked back at his face, I noticed that Jayden was gripping Connor’s hair tightly; both of them had closed their eyes. Watching the scene play out before me, my own cock was rock hard and I adjusted myself in my jeans as I walked around to where Lexi was slowly fucking Connor with the vibrator. The intermittent sound of buzzing mingled with his grunts of pleasure. Jayden stopped moving and groaned as he climaxed inside of Connor’s mouth. Connor leaned up slightly on his elbows and swallowed until Jayden was spent.

Lexi had pulled out a low stool and had added a strap around her waist and legs that she was affixing the vibrator to. When she was ready, she grasped tightly to Connor’s hips and thrust hers forward. The sound he made was somewhere between a groan and a whimper as she filled him. As she continued steadily thrusting, I could hear the soft sound of her hips slapping against his reddened buttocks. Jayden came around to Connor’s other side and after applying lubricant to his hand, began to stroke Connor’s fully erect cock. Connor grunted in time with the thrusts and I could tell he was close.

“Don’t you orgasm until you’re told, boy, or you will be punished,” Jayden told him. Connor locked his jaw as he concentrated on staving off his orgasm. I unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans to relieve a little of the pressure on my own raging erection, but after a moment of watching Lexi fucking Connor, I gave up and pulled my cock free of my jeans to stroke myself. Watching and not participating in the action was different and I found myself torn – I wanted to join in, but the moment was theirs. Connor started to whimper. It was so drawn out that it was almost a whine. It wouldn’t be long before he came and he knew that if that happened before he was allowed, he would displease his Master and Mistress.

“Very good, Connor. Much better. I want you to come now,” Jayden said affectionately. It sounded as if it were something they had been working on. Apparently Connor hadn’t mastered his control as easily as Jayden and Lexi. Crying out as his orgasm ripped through him, he pressed his head against the table, grunting and growling with the intensity of it. When his orgasm started to subside, Lexi gently extracted the vibrator from him. They rubbed and caressed him as they untied him, assuring him that he had done very well and that they were pleased.

Connor’s eyes lit up when Lexi instructed him to undress her, his hands slowly removed her bra, letting it slide down her arms, revealing her soft breasts. Then, he pulled her panties down her legs, letting his hands slide down her long legs as he did so. She pulled his face to her breast and he kissed it gently before sucking the nipple into his mouth, as Lexi moaned and pulled him to the other breast. He was on his knees now, worshiping her body with his mouth.

Jayden grinned and looked at me. Taking my hand, he led me back to the chair and pushed me down into it before pulling off his jeans. As I lifted my hips off the chair, he pulled my own jeans down to my ankles and then looked up into my face. His smirk was just… just… fucking hot as he leaned forward and wrapped his perfect lips around my cock. Digging my fingers into the arms of the chair, I strained not to just grab his head and fuck his mouth. He was doing it to alleviate my stress, to show his affection and to please me – I would let him set the pace. He started by using his tongue up and down the length of my cock. Letting my head fall back, resting against the soft leather, Lexi came into my line of vision and I watched her straddle Connor’s face as he lay on the playroom floor, grinding herself into his eager mouth. Unbound, his hands grasped and squeezed her ass as she rode his sweet face. Wildly, she moaned as he added his fingers to the onslaught of her soft sex.