Read A Little Bit of Truth (Little Bits) Online
Authors: A. E. Murphy
I hate this. I hate that we aren’t talking. I wish everything would go back to the way it was.
I look around me Marie and do you know what I see? Nothing. I see nothing. My life is miserable. I’m forever pretending to be something I’m not. My friends aren’t real, my life isn’t real. I don’t even know who I am anymore. Not one person in this place cares about me.
And then I met you. Suddenly I have friends, suddenly I have a life and suddenly I don’t have to pretend. All I do is pretend. I’m always somebody else to the world, some guy that works on a farm and falls in love with a pretend girl in some cliché movie, some guy holding up men’s deodorant that stinks awful but I pretend to like it. Pretend, pretend, pretend. All my fucking life is pretend.
For once I was happy. And now I’ve lost you.
You’re the only thing I ever had that was real. You’re my truth, my reality.
I want that back. I want you b
++++++++++++
My heart hammers against my chest almost painfully. I nearly scream at the screen, “FINISH IT! FINISH THAT SENTENCE!”
This is dated for a while before he sent me the apology email that he sent. It must have been not long after he left the city. Oh my god.
I’m his real.
“You’re my real,” I say and place my lips against his. “You’re my truth.”
He doesn’t hear me. I don’t expect him too. I probably wouldn’t say it if he were able to hear me.
I’m not sure how long I sleep for before I feel a hand on my head. Smiling I blink up at my beautiful star, tears fill my eyes.
“Jake.”
“Hey baby,” he whispers and smiles weakly at me. “Where am I?”
“Hospital.”
“You didn’t break my dick did you?” Trust him to make stupid jokes at a time like this.
Looking at his panic, I think he might be serious.
“No baby, I just got here,” I press the button that alerts the nurse. “I’ll let somebody else explain because I don’t want to say the wrong thing and confuse you.”
“Now I’m freaked,” he looks around the room and spots Landon on the chair dozing in the corner. I place the straw against his lips and allow him a few small sips before the nurse comes in and asks him what he remembers.
“Not much beyond…” he looks up in thought. “I remember… running lines with L
andon. Then I drank my usual detox shake.” Detox shake? “Beth brought it. Then it’s a blank.”
“That’s to be expected,” the nurse says all formal and businesslike. She proceeds to tell him the drug used and its effects and why it had such a negative impact on him. I watch him nod every few seconds, absorbing the information. Then she finishes with, “The police will want to speak with you soon. Although not much of a statement will be needed, from what I’ve heard she handed herself in and the drug she used.”
“Dear god,” is all he says and rubs his face with his hands. He scowls at the cannula sticking out of the top of his wrist. “What’s this?”
“The antidote,” I answer in words we both understand. The nurse only nods, knowing he’s tired and large medical words for medicines he’ll never need again (hopefully) aren’t important right now.
“So, why are you here?” he suddenly asks me when the nurse leaves, as Landon stretches and stands.
“If you want me to go…” I leave the sentence hanging, I’m joking of course.
“No! Of course I don’t, I’m happy to see you, I just…”
“She’s kidding,” Landon laughs and pinches my nose playfully. “I’ll give you both some space. Hungry?”
“You don’t have to do that,” I say on a frown.
“I need food, so do you. Burger?”
I nod eagerly and my stomach growls in agreement.
“Good to have you back asshole,” Landon says to Jacob and exits the room.
“You have black eyes,” Jacob says and wipes his thumb under my eye before showing me. Shit. I completely forgot about the makeup. “And where’s that cute bee costume?”
“In the burner as soon as I find one.”
He laughs at that, it quickly turns into a cough. “Still got the flu?”
“Yeah, it’s just a chest infection now though. Thanks for coming Marie,” he says this last part softly, the gratitude and adoration in his eyes brings tears to mine again. “Hey, don’t cry.”
“I never cry, I cried when Loryn was in hospital and I’m crying now. God, I was so scared Jake,” I rest my head on his chest, letting the tears fall. I’m such a baby.
“Get in,” he orders, I don’t hesitate to kick my shoes off and snuggle into his side. “I’ll be okay.”
“You were drugged Jacob, that’s not okay. It never will be.”
“It wouldn’t have been if I’d woken up alone.” He admits and the pain of his
words tear through me like a paper through a shredder. “But I didn’t.”
“You’re important to me,” I squeeze him tighter and wrap my leg around his. Fuck hospital rules.
“I wouldn’t have been able to stay away even if I’d tried.”
“You’re important to me too,” he whispers against my hair.
I tilt my head back to look at him just as he tilts his down. Our eyes lock for minutes, hours, seconds. Who cares? My heart throbs slowly but heavily as his hand comes up and strokes the hair from my face. A gesture so tender my breath hitches.
My own hand slides up his chest before resting over his heart. His lips part slightly, I’
m drawn to them, I move closer.
Our gazes remain, eyes on eyes, heart beats merged, limbs entwined. Something passes
between us, something unspoken. We seal it with a kiss.
A soft kiss. A perfect kiss. A kiss I’ll take with me to the grave.
Being poisoned could possibly be the best thing that has ever happened to me. Seriously. I know that sounds ridiculous but… she fucking kissed me! Is it wrong I want to dance? She never kisses me, never.
In the past hour Marie has shown me more emotion than she has in the past year.
She cares about me.
I have someone who genuinely cares about me. Sure I have Maya and the rest and clearly Landon. But this is different. I don’t know why, it just is. It feels different to the rest. This is a different level of caring. Gah. Why can’t I explain it? I don’t know what it is. I only know that it’s more. More than anything else. More than everything else.
She kissed me. She’s never kissed me apart from the first time we had sex and even then I could tell she was
forcing it. This wasn’t forced, not even a little bit. This kiss meant something.
I sound like a sap.
Or as Landon would say, “Get your vagina out why don’t you?”
Yeah, these thoughts are totally not helping. Also I’m kind of tired.
She kissed me!
I look down at the sleeping female, her hair tickles my chin and her arms squeeze me tight as if she’s afraid I’ll run away. Never. No more running.
“I want out of the movie,” I say to Landon as he walks into the room with an armful of
food.
Landon smirks, “Is this because of the crazy bitch or is it because of the female you have in your arms?”
“It’s time for me to live a little,” and this is true. I finally have something good, I’m not going to throw that away again.
“Yeah, well I told them I won’t finish it with Beth. What are you going to do about her anyway?”
Good question, “I don’t know. Do the press know what’s happened yet?”
He nods a little, his face showing signs of stress, “No.” Leaning back, he pulls out a burger making my mouth water, bites into it and moans like it’s the tastiest burger in the world. Asshole. “Her agent has her out
on bail already and they’re discussing payment settlements. This could ruin her career.” He doesn’t sound sad about that, more like triumphant. “I knew she was a little bit weird, just not to that extent.”
“Hear, hear,” I agree because he’s right. I never would have expected her to do something so stupid. “I’ll talk to my publicist tomorrow. See what she thinks.”
“You want my opinion?”
Shrug.
“Press charges, let them deal with her.”
“Bumblebee,” Marie mumbles against my chest. “Stupid kid.”
I stifle my laugh by pressing my lips to her forehead and running my fingers up and down her back. Then I say my thoughts out loud, “She came dude. She fucking came.”
“I hope you mean she came here
to where we are and not the dirty version.”
“Fuck off,” I laugh and stroke her nose with my thumb. “Nobody has ever come for me before. I guess I just got used to it.”
“I was here too asshole, thanks for the appreciation.” He feigns offence, before I can defend myself he adds, “But yeah, I get what you mean. In this life it’s hard to find genuine people. I think you’ve got one right there in your arms.”
“Yeah.”
“So, I didn’t want to ask her for fear of upsetting her,” he clears his throat. “What’s that black shit all around her eyes?”
“You need to check my Facebook page dude,” I laugh at the image of Marie as a bumblebee in my mind.
Then I sober and glance over at the paper bag in the corner of the room. “That hers?”
Landon nods, “It’s what she came with.”
“Look for yellow.”
“Awesome, I love snooping through… what the fuck is this?”
And we laugh, Marie doesn’t wake, or she pretends to sleep to avoid the ribbing we’re eager to give her. Christ I feel like shit. Yet I also feel really fucking good. She came, she kissed me and I’m important to her.
******
“No mom,” I jest. “I’m fine I swear.”
“I should rip out her throat but I’m sure Marie has that written in her own schedule,” she says curtly over the phone. “But seriously, are you okay? I wish I could’ve come but I didn’t have time and…”
“Maya, I promise I’m fine, just feeling hung-over is all. Look, I have to…”
“Don’t you dare hang up on me Jacob Stone, you’re my friend too. Just because you favor one of our group doesn’t mean you can leave the rest of us out.”
“Duly noted.”
She sighs, “But are you sure…”
“I’m fine,” I start laughing, she just makes me laugh, sometimes I can’t help it.
“Well, okay then. But if you’re not you better call me.”
“Yeah. I promise.”
“By
e my special little guy,” and then she’s gone. What the fuck does she mean by special?
“Marie?” I call and watch as the sexiest woman in the world steps out of the en-suite and into my hospital room with a mascara wand half way to her face. Even when she pulls that stretched face while applying makeup she looks fucking gorgeous. “Why does Maya keep calling me special?”
“It might have something to do with the fact that you thought twelve times twelve was a thousand and twenty four.” Good point. “Or the fact you thought Canada was south.” Another good point. “Or the fact you put Evelyn’s diaper on the wrong way round and then proceeded to use sticky tape because you couldn’t keep it closed.”
“Okay, I get it. But in my defense, that
diaper was faulty.”
“There’s another reason right there, because you’re so fucking adorable when you’re confused.”
Hey. “I’m not confused.”
“Sure you’re not baby.”
“Come here,” his tone is demanding, it goes straight to my moo.
So go to him I do. He sits up on the side of the bed but before I reach him the doctor is in with the nurse and they’re ushering me out.
They don’t leave for thirty minutes, during that thirty minutes a uniformed officer with his casually dressed partner of law both stroll in to take a statement, I assume. When they leave they give me a nod and I finally have permission to enter.
What I see is Jacob with no drip in his arm, getting dressed to the side of the window. “I’m free to leave.”
“Is that wise? I mean, you were just poisoned.” This can’t be right. He’s been in here just over twelve hours. How can this be safe?
“I assume it’s all good, I just have to drink plenty of water and get some rest.”
I frown, my anxiety not dissipating like I hoped, “Can’t you do that here?”
“They probably need the bed. I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
“And if you’re not? This is unacceptable.
They can’t just force you out… I’m calling somewhere private.” He grips my shoulders mid rant, I almost forget my words as I take in his beautiful naked chest. “I’m serious.” Can I kiss your chest?
“I’d rather be in a hotel with you than in a hospital feeling awkward.” He’s right. It sucks but he’s right. “And if anything happens you’ll be with me.” I open my mouth to agree but he finishes with, “And your mouth will be around my cock. You’ll notice stra
ight away if I suddenly go all weird.”