A New Day (8 page)

CHAPTER THREE

     Gary’s fist fell heavily against the typewriter.  He just couldn’t seem to find the flow!  He couldn’t break through, and tap into what he knew God had for him.  It was so frustrating to be at an impasse spiritually, just when he had so much to contend with!  Namely, Tasha. 

    
Deep inside, he knew that his attitude toward her was a good part of the reason for his desert season.  He hadn’t known he was capable of being so harsh and unyielding.  It certainly hadn’t done any good, it had just made her that much more contentious and prickly.  Rebellion was boiling just under the surface, all the time.

     “
God, how can I put up with her all summer?
“ he wondered tiredly.  “
She’s absolutely impossible.
 
What are you asking me to do, Lord?  What am I missing here?  There’s something very wrong,
and I can't figure out what to do about it.
” he admitted.

    
He went into his bedroom, and put in a tape of the sweetest music he knew – worship.  He flopped onto his bed, and let the headphones pour the healing sounds into his ears.  Immediately, he began to relax and unwind, and shake off his frustrations.

    
Thinking of Tasha, he began to chuckle.  That girl could cause more trouble than any ten people he knew put together, and she was spoiled absolutely rotten.  But Gary enjoyed bringing out the battle lights in her eyes.  Most of the time. 

    
That day in the van, when they’d driven up the coast, she’d pushed him too far.  But for the most part, she just amused him. 

    
Deb needed her here.  It was going to be a lonely summer for her, without Doug.  If for no other reason, he had to try to get along with Tasha for Deb’s sake.  Their warfare had both Deb and Ruth a little on edge, and he regretted that.  He knew Tasha could care less how much their animosity upset the household, but he did.  Something was going to have to change.  It obviously was going to have to be
him
.

    
He sighed, got up, and went back to his typewriter.  The flow of words began, and he typed as fast as he could, sketching an outline.  He knew now that the flow would come, just looking at Tasha on Sunday morning.  He was going to talk about the death that comes with self-inflicted isolation, the defenses people erect to keep others from coming too close, touching too deeply. 

     
Carefully examining his own heart, Gary had a new revelation that these defenses are very real and potent, indeed.

     Tasha listened obediently to Gary preach, with a bored, sullen expression on her face.  She wasn’t giving him one iota of satisfaction.  She knew he was preaching specifically to her and about her, and it just wasn’t going to do him a lick of good!

    
She glanced down at her long, burgundy nails and yawned, admiring the way they matched her lovely velvet suit of the same color.  She was glad she’d worn her hair down and curled it extravagantly; Jim looked as if he’d love to run his hands through it then and there.

    
Tasha smile coquettishly at him, and was gratified to see him blush.  Soft, sweet butter, he was, just waiting for her to melt him with her eyes.  He’d be good for a few thrills through the summer, but she’d have to be a little careful.  He was awfully possessive, she suspected.  She’d probably have to lie about her departure date, and leave without saying goodbye to him, when the time came.

    
Deb nudged her arm, and stood up.  Coming back to the present, Tasha followed her friend.  “What are you doing?” Tasha grumbled, evading Jim’s hand, that was reaching for her elbow. 

     “
Weren’t you listening?  It’s time for communion.”  Deb chastised.

     “
Oh, brother.  What do I have to do?” Tasha grumbled.

     “
Just follow me up there, take the wine and bread, and then kneel on the bench.  Gary or Pastor Sherman will come and bless you.”

     “
No way am I letting either one touch me!  Who’s this Sherman guy?”

     “
He’s the assistant pastor here.  It’s all right, Tasha.  There’s nothing to be worried about.”

     “
Easy for you to say!  Why are they putting their hands on everyone’s heads?”

     “
It’s just a way to offer a blessing, Tasha.  They’re ministering to the people.  Gary can ...”

     “
No, thanks!  Looks like Hypnosis or Brainwashing or something, to me.”  Tasha snapped suspiciously.

     “
Oh, stop!  Just relax, Tasha, it won’t hurt you a bit.  Besides, if you don’t want it, they’ll leave you alone.  But you have to at least go to the altar now, you’re already up here.”  Deb hissed, feeling irritated by Tasha's persistent muttering.

    
Tasha glared suspiciously as Deb took a crumb of whole grain bread and ate it, then sipped from a silver goblet.  She shook off Jim’s hand irritably, and moved forward.  It was too late to do anything else, now.

    
She found the bread sweet, the wine mild.  She walked over and knelt on the bench with a stony expression on her pretty features.

    
In a moment, Gary came close, and leaned over to whisper in her ear.  “Well, Tasha,” he marveled, “I’m pleased to see you up here on bended knee, before God and the church.  And of your own free will!  Could it be you’re softening just a bit?” he teased gently.  “Cracking a  mite, are we?”

     “
Don’t count on it.  I was tricked!”  she hissed.  She was afraid.  She didn’t want him to touch her.  “If it wouldn’t disgrace the Waldens, I’d be
out
of here!  Believe me!”

     “
Is that right?” he chuckled quietly.  “I thought you were too smart to be so neatly trapped at the altar, for all to see and marvel at.  Bless Deb’s little heart.”

     “
Lay one hand on me, and I will bite you with all my might.”  she vowed, glaring up at him with pure venom in her eyes.  She reached out to grab at his approaching wrist, but found her hand somehow swallowed helplessly in the grasp of his.  She began to panic as she felt a charged warmth flowing from him into her, where they were touching. 

     “
All right, Tasha.  Then I’ll just give you a lick and a promise.”  he agreed quietly.  “Just be certain that you remember this moment of mercy.”  he chuckled. 

     
She felt his other hand slip around to the back of her neck.  He bent over, and drew her head against his shoulder in a harmless hug.  Held snugly there, Tasha felt a deep, quiet sureness in him, and amazingly ... there was acceptance and affection!  For her?  It was not possible!  She hated him, and he obviously hated her!

     
When he finally released her from the hug, she stared up at him suspiciously.  Try as she might, she just could not figure Gary Taylor out.

    
His serious, probing eyes followed her soberly as she retreated quickly to her seat.  She was sure everyone was staring at them.

    
She watched him minister to the rest of the people surreptitiously, seeing the flow of love from him, to all of them.  And they all obviously adored him. 

    
Especially that pretty Marietta creature and her little girl, that had been clinging all over him last Sunday.  She was just like Maple syrup now, when he went to put his hand on her head and pray for her.  It was disgusting!  They had a closeness that was evident to all. 

    
And yet, as suspicious as Tasha was of Marietta's motives, it
was
a global thing.  For all the people there seemed to fit in a place that was exclusively theirs -- to be loved and cherished by their pastors.

    
Tasha inexplicably began to know a hunger for that special kind of acceptance and love, so freely given here.  It was unique.  She’d never seen anything like it!  It became a dull ache, somewhere deep inside her. 

    
It wasn’t fair that everyone else here should have something so vital and precious – yes, precious! – that
she, herself
was without.  She, with her extreme beauty and wealth, should be better loved than the rest of them!

     “
It is because of your need that you should be loved at this time.”  a voice said inside her.  “Not for anything that you are in yourself, or anything you have done.”

    
Tasha was astounded.  That had not been
her
thought!  And she needed nothing!  She needed no one!  She
lacked
nothing!   The very thought was ludicrous and insulting!

    
It made her angry, and unbearable to live with.  Everyone had to bite their tongue to keep from reacting to her tirades that afternoon.  Everyone except Gary, that is.  He alone seemed to be completely unaffected. 

    
Tasha continued to lash out at Gary every chance she had, with greater and greater determination.  What
really
made her angry is that he never seemed to be perturbed by it; and often had that patient, peaceful look on his face that made her feel foolish and tacky for her behavior.  More often than not, she found her foot securely stuck in her mouth these days whenever she tried to needle him.

    
Tasha found herself becoming very lonely.  Her behavior was creating gaping chasms between herself and the others in the household.  She’d always been something of a loner, but she’d never had this awful, empty, ache inside!  She could hardly stand to be in the cabin with any of them anymore. 

    
She’d nearly made up her mind to leave.  It’s just that there was really nowhere she cared to go.  Her daddy was on the East Coast tied up with boring business, and all her friends were on cruises, or vacationing somewhere.  She was high and dry.

    
She found herself on the deck one evening, in sheer desperation for some company.  Jim had been gone on a job out of town ever since that awful communion Sunday, and she was afraid her loneliness was about to overcome her.

    
She was staring at her nails with dissatisfaction, when a voice behind her shoulder startled her.  “Care to take a walk?”

    
She whirled.  Gary stared mildly at her soft hands clenched with tension, her eyes sparking with hatred.  “You’ve got to be kidding!  Take a walk with
you
, you pompous bleeding heart ineffectual, sniveling
preacher
?” she spat.

    
Gary let his eyes flick over her briefly in disappointment, and descended the stairs without response.

     “
Oh, what the hell.”  she muttered and followed him.  “I suppose you think you’re being
so
gallant
, asking me to go with you!”

    
He sighed.  “Why would I think that?  I just thought it would be nice to have some companionship for a change.  Forgive the mistake.” 

     “
You?
  What do you need with companionship?  You have
God
.”  she mocked.

     “
That’s right.  But I still enjoy a lady’s company every now and then.  Guess I chose wrong tonight, didn’t I?  Forgive the mistake.”

    
Indignation rose in Tasha’s breast, welling into a blinding rage.  “How
dare
you?  You big jerk!”

     “
Look who’s talking!”  he lashed back at her.  He grabbed her arms, and shook her soundly.  “Can’t you
ever
stop?  Do us both a favor, and just go back to the house if you don’t want to go with me.  I’m sick of listening to your garbage.  I love this part of the coast, that’s why I wanted to come here to recover.  It was a terrible mistake!  After this summer, every time I let my heart turn this way, to think about this beautiful place, I am quite certain I’ll hear in my mind your selfish snapping and caterwauling.  It’s been such a constant, I’m sure I’ll have a permanent and horrible association.”

     “
You are so insufferable!” she accused angrily.  “You’re the most difficult, headstrong,
offensive
man I’ve ever met in my life!”

     “
Why?  Because I tell you the truth about yourself?”

     “
The
truth
?  You’re deranged!”