A Secret Passion (33 page)

“Impossible,” Jane had giggled while trying to maintain a serious expression.

But it had been possible. She had congratulated them with sincere warmth after inviting them in for tea. It seemed they were off to Scotland with his sister and father to marry without the delay of the banns. Miss Dodderidge had even insisted Harry continue his plans for the expedition later in the term!

Jane brought her attention back to the blacksmith’s notes and spring foaling charts. The rumbling of a conveyance in the stable yard broke her concentration. As she stared out the doorway to find her father’s carriage in the yard, a feeling of dread swept through her. Father would never return so soon unless a calamity had beset the family again. A great welling of relief poured through her when Theo descended from the carriage.

“Not even bothering to hide the breeches anymore, Jane? You have been rusticating too long!” he said as he embraced her.

Jane laughed with embarrassment. “You’ve caught me.”

“I see life here agrees with you, as it always did.” He followed her into the large office and threw himself into the chair opposite her desk. He shook his head after picking up one of the charts and put it down with little interest.

“Be a good sister and give your dear brother a drink, if you please. Father refuses to spare a shilling to refurbish that rattlebox, and the dirt seeps in through every crack. It’s a disgrace, I tell you.”

Jane smiled and pulled an unlabeled bottle of brandy from one of the drawers as well as two dusty glasses. “Will this do?”

She poured as he nodded. “To sisters who obey their brothers’ every command!” he toasted.

“To undemanding brothers,” offered up Jane.

“Have you guessed why I’m here?” quizzed Theo after drinking long and deep.

“I cannot guess,” she said. “You aren’t planning marriage, are you? I don’t think I could bear to hear anymore cooing.”

“No, but you shall hear spoon-talk all the same. I’m here to take you to our dear Aunt Clarissa’s wedding.”

Jane held up her hand. “Stop. I am not going. You have added needless time to your trip if that is the purpose of your visit. I have arranged to see the newlyweds next summer. I can’t go. I have a mare expected to drop any day now, and her last foaling was difficult. I won’t go!”

“Easy, you old thing. Touched a nerve, did I? Well, it won’t fadge. You’re going, even if I have to bundle up your belongings myself and stuff you into the carriage, fetters and all. And don’t think I wouldn’t do it! I have it on very good authority that someone here—yes, I do believe his name is George—will help me tie you down if necessary.” Theo continued over the frequent interruptions of his sister, “Honestly, my dearest, what are you thinking? However can you consider denying our aunt the pleasure of your company on the most anticipated day of her life? The very person who loved you and cared for you like no other these last few months! You once told me I should be ashamed. Well, now I fling it back in your face!” Theo threw up his hands as he left, refusing to listen to any of the shouted excuses following him out into the yard.

She would go. She wasn’t comfortable with her decision, but she was packed. And Theo had not had to resort to any of his repeated threats over the course of the last two days. The way Jane envisioned it, she might even be able to go and be in
his
presence for a few short hours at most. She and Theo would stay but one night in Clarissa’s small cottage. That was the promise she had insisted on and secured from her brother. After the wedding ceremony, they would go the short distance to Portsmouth and stay at an inn. At the very least, the trip to Littlefield would ease her guilt over denying Clarissa’s appeals.

With heavy heart, Jane left. She felt a pang when she noticed a conspiratorial wink from George to Theo as she entered the carriage. It seemed everyone thought her reluctance amusing.

“You do realize Lord Graystock said he had no desire to continue our acquaintance. Why you insist on adding to his discomfort I do not know. But I shall say no more. I am bored with our discussion already. I hope you do not expect witty conversation this trip, for I am not up to the task.”

“A bitter tongue does not suit you, Jane. Come on, shake hands with me, then. I won fair and square this time. You win most of the other times. Be a gentleman even though you aren’t wearing those breeches again today. Thank God, I might add!”

Chapter Sixteen

THE winds were blowing less now, but the air became chilly as they moved up the eastern coast. The chestnut trees she had seen earlier in the year, lush with foliage, were dropping their matted ceiling of leaves with every rush of wind. The promise of spring was now lost to autumn’s killing frost.

Jane clutched her hands in front of her to stave off the slight trembling as they approached Littlefield. As the carriage stopped in front of the grove of trees between the road and Clarissa’s cottage, Theo leaned forward and opened the door. After bounding down, he held his hand up to help her. She avoided glancing about her and hurried to the cottage.

Theo laughed. “You are a hen-hearted girl! Fear not. There is not a soul about at this unearthly hour.”

Jane turned. “If you are going to continue to tease and needle me, I will return to Portsmouth now! See if I don’t!”

Theo relented and whistled a merry tune while walking toward their aunt’s door.

Rolfe stood staring out the intricate stained-glass windows, his hands clasped behind him, feeling very relaxed. While it was true he had had only a few hours of sleep the night before, he was fully awake and could smile at the nervous tapping of Sir Thomas’ fashionably shod foot beside him.

“Steady there, Gooding. Wouldn’t want to appear rickety, would you?” he asked with a smile. “I suppose you would be calm if we switched places?” Sir Thomas asked as Rolfe patted him on the back.

Rolfe could be relaxed, as he had had a moment the previous evening, when he had arrived, to review the list of people who had accepted invitations to breakfast at Hesperides.
Her
name was not on it; only Theodore was included on the list. Even the father had chosen to stay away, much to Rolfe’s relief.

Yet while he could remain steady, there was just the smallest part of him that had shriveled up and died last night. It was the part that had smoldered the past month while he had traveled among his far-flung estates. It had refused to budge despite the hours of tormented reflection he had endured. It was final now. She was lost to him.

The morning sunbeams, streaming into the small church through the arched front doorway, dimmed as a few quiet noises emanated from the back. The pews, filled to capacity, became hushed as a backlit figure moved to the center aisle. Rolfe looked at his friend to see joy fill his face. He looked back at Clarissa to find her looking younger than he remembered, and almost pretty in a cream-colored dress and long gloves.

Another slim figure was beside her, rearranging a flower in her hair. The familiar form slipped into the second-row pew next to her brother.

Rolfe turned toward the old reverend and stood motionless, feeling all the blood rush from his head into his pulsating fingertips. Good God! He wasn’t going to faint, was he? No, never that. She had come. He closed his eyes and tried to think. She had come because it was her duty. Her aunt would have begged her to attend during this, the most celebrated day of her life.

He opened his eyes again as he heard Reverend Gurcher’s request for the ring. He managed his office without a tremor, all the while keeping his eyes fixed on the couple before him. A loud whirring in his ears would not allow him to hear the rest of the vows. Finally, raucous laughter and good cheer filled the church while everyone filtered out into the yard.

Rolfe was the last to leave the church and the first to enter one of the few carriages in the yard. The vast majority of the villagers had chosen to walk to Hesperides, given the sparkling perfection of the cool day. Rolfe closed the curtains of his carriage to block out the light and any urge he might have to look for her face among the throngs of people. He lay back against the cushions and sighed. She had come after all.

As she trudged through the fallen leaves, up the last hill before the vista that held the entrance to Hesperides Hall, only Theo’s strong arm linked with hers kept her moving forward.

He had not looked at her once during the entire ceremony. It did not bode well for her. But then, perhaps she was just of a timorous mind. Viewing the large number of villagers walking before her, she thought there was a good chance she would have to endure only a few minutes before the host, bidding the required number of thank-yous and good days. Before she could form in her mind the words she would say, she found Theo propelling her up the long steps leading to Hesperides Hall, where the doors had been thrown open wide to admit all. She pulled the edges of her pale gray cloak more tightly together as she looked at Theo.

“It will be all right. Don’t be such a ninny. It doesn’t suit you,” he whispered before bowing to the dowager countess.

“So good to see you again, Lady Graystock,” Jane murmured as she curtsied. She presented her brother to the older lady.

“My dear, the pleasure is all mine, I am sure. I had such grand hopes you would attend. A pity you could not come earlier for the fall festival this week past. But then, I failed to entice my grandson as well.” The matriarch patted Jane’s hand. “The weather cooperated, and such a fine time was had. But never mind, you are here now. Come, let me introduce you to the Smiths, and the Kellerys down from London,” Lady Graystock said as she motioned the footmen to close the doors.

“You are most kind, Lady Graystock,” Theo responded.

“Young man, at my age, one is not kind, just practical!” she responded with a deep chuckle. “Ah, I see Mrs. Gurcher headed our way. Make your escape while you can. I am afraid, my dears, you are going to have to fend for yourselves,” she continued while extending a welcoming hand and a false smile to the reverend’s loquacious wife.

Theo pulled Jane into the large salon in the rear of the hall. Spanning one end of the mansion to the other, the sunny yellow room was filled with the happy sounds of a celebration. Mounds of sugared confections and exotic fruits were artfully piled on tiered stands upon the large table in the center of the room. The scent of hothouse flowers teased Jane’s nostrils as she and Theo advanced toward the largest gathering of people, sure to include the bride and her proud husband. Jane was careful to keep her eyes trained on the floor ahead of her.

“Ah, you are here at last! Theo, Jane, do come stand beside me,” Clarissa implored with a radiant expression.

Jane’s eyes darted to the tall gentleman standing next to Sir Thomas. Her gaze moved away when she perceived his reserved expression.

“Aunt Clarissa, as I told you this morning, you are a ravishing bride, and Sir Thomas—you are a lucky man!” Theo exclaimed as he clapped his hand on Sir Thomas’ shoulder.

“I am indeed. And you both have made my bride very happy with your presence, and so you are in my good favor.”