A Symphony of Cicadas (10 page)

Seven

W
ith a steady hand, I drew a thin line of black above my upper lash
.
I did this on both sides before enhancing the widened look of my eyes with a layer of mascara
.
My
golden
hair was already curled, and I pinned it back from my face and neck in an elaborate series of flowers and sparkling clips
.
After I touched my lips with a bit of rose stain, I stepped back from the mirror over my bathroom sink and inspected my work
.
I couldn’t help but smile with pride, seeing a vision in front of me that had never looke
d lovelier
.
My skin was radiant,
the lines I
used
to hide nowhere to be found in the face that smiled back at me
.
My hair
shone
like never before
.
Even my teeth appeared whiter against the dusty rose color of my mouth.

On the bed was a large white garment bag, one that had been cinched up tight in my closet for months
.
Beside it lay a white bodice and slip
.
I stepped into the slip, pulling it up over my narrow hips and
placing
the slit in the front
.
I
slipped the bodice over my head and leaned forward so I could pull
the ribbons
tight
in the back
.
The motion was so awkward
I wished my sister were there to help me
.
M
y fingers didn’t reach as far as I would have liked
, b
ut somehow I was able to get it closed without any assistance
.
Another glance in the mirror revealed an image out of a boudoir photo, my
close
fitting undergarments tightening my physique, revealing
a voluptuous
version
of what lay underneath.

I unzipped the garment bag
with care
, placing my hand inside to save the dress from catching on the zipper
.
Pulling the bag aside, the dress I had been waiting
for so long
to wear
shone
back
at me
.
I ran my hand over the soft fabric, admiring the creamy white material layered with small roses and lace
.
Lifting it off the bed, I stepped into the top of the gown and gathered it up to my breast
.
I pulled the ribbon tight in the back, taking the time to tighten each strand one by one until there was no more give.

Stepping into a pair of
delicate
white shoes that rested beside the bed, I took one last glimpse of my reflection in the mirror, and was taken aback
by
the vision of perfection that stared
b
ack at me
.
In all my months of detailing every aspect of our celebration, I had been
sure I’d never achieve
the classic look of a young
bride often associated with weddings
.
And here she was,
her innocence
staring at me from the full-length mirror of my closet door, ready to be given away.

“Is this real
ly
helping?” a voice asked behind me.

“Does it matter?” I answered, not even flinching at the
unexpected
presence
that had joined me
.
I turned around to see Jane, a girl I
once
knew in my college years, sitting on the bed next to the empty garment bag.

I met Jane in our freshman year of college. She lived a few doors down from my dorm room
.
Her roommate was
best friends with my roommate, Lisa, which meant Jane would sometimes hang around with us
.
I didn’t mind the girl, except that she had a little bit of a wild streak to her
.
This both captivated me and scared the shit out of me
.
Having grown up in a small town, I had been raised to keep a low profile and never do anything that would end up
in
the community’s gossip mill
.
Jane seemed to have grown up in a
much
different environment,
as she sought
attention from anyone willing to be her audience
.
And when it came to seeking thrills, she had no fear whatsoever
.
She was not on
ly
a willing participant
in
a lifestyle of hard partying and risk taking, she was also known to push limits beyond the comfort zone of those around her.

* * * *

“Try this shit, it’s fucking amazing,” Jane said, shoving a pipe with some unknown substance in my face
.
The smell of burning plastic was so strong I had to push her hand away
.
“Come on Rachel, don’t be such a prude,” she laughed before bringing it to her lips and lighting a flame to it
.
I watched with both disgust and intrigue as the pipe took hold of the flame with her breath, burning into an orange ember before going out into a string of smoke
.
She leaned back, holding her breath before letting it out in front of her in a cloud of yellowed white
.
With a dazed look, she grinned over at me.

“I have no issues with being a prude,” I told her
.
“I’m actual
ly
quite comfortable with it
.
That shit will kill you.”

It was the night after our
freshman
finals and we were all blowing off some steam at a party a few seniors were
throwing
.
Lisa was in the corner with a guy she had been trying to talk to for weeks and
Jane’s
roommate had already disappeared into one of the bedrooms upstairs
.
Never being one to drink
much
, I
nursed
my
red cup of
beer, marveling at how I
might be
the on
ly
sober one in the room
.
The majority of the party was made up of freshmen, many
of whom
were
taking advantage of the freedom they’d discovered this year by overindulging in anything illegal they could get their hands on
.
Next to us, a few girls giggled as they took turns snorting lines of cocaine off the glass coffee table
.
Marijuana joints glowed around the room, as casual as if they were regular cigarettes
.
Music played low on the sound system in the corner, allowing for a din of chatter to hum around the room while keeping a low profile from the cops
.
The party was a bit too wild for my taste, but I wasn’t about to abandon Lisa by going back to the safety of my dorm
.
I figured if I just nursed the one beer, I could handle a bit of stupidity from my classmates.

Bored
with
me, Jane
leapt up from
the couch and
made a beeline
for the sound system in the corner of the room
.
She turned up the volume, eliciting cheers from those around her
.
The energy of the room
transformed from the laid back atmosphere, filling
with animated
bodies
who began to dance
to a steady
beat
of music.

“Come on and dance!” a guy from my English class yelled at me over the music while holding out his hand
.
I grinned, taking his hand while still clutching my drink
.
I couldn’t quite remember his name, but I had a feeling it didn’t matter
.
Turns out I was right
.
Within moments of
joining the crowd I lost him
.
More and more people migrated into the dancing room
, coming together to create a shapeless entity that fed off the energy within
.
In the center of it all I could catch glimpses of Jane, her eyes closed as she danced to a beat all her own
.
She swirled
in different directions as the high
-
energy dance moves around her clashed
with
her flowing movements
.
I could tell something wasn’t quite right when she opened her eyes, and didn’t seem to register all that was going on around her.

I did my best to maneuver through the crowd to her, a feat that proved difficult
.
As t
h
e song shifted to a trance beat
,
g
listening bodies moved
in suggestive motions
against
anyone who was close to them
.
Groping h
ands
were everywhere, trying
to caress
whatever was
within reach
.
The smell of sweat was pungent in the air, and my own clothes clung to me
like a second skin
.
I sipped at my beer to cool off as I continued to
make my way
through the crowd, trying not to stare
too long at the dancers around me
.
A girl
with closed eyes continued to move
while several of the guys around her took turns fondling her breasts
.
Another couple was entwined in a tangled embrace
, their mouths exploring each other’s lips
as if no one were around them
.
All around me,
the mood had
shifted from a casual dance party to
something much more risqué
.
And in the center of it all was Jane who had fallen to the
floor
and now lay there with her eyes wide open.

“Jane!” I screamed,
leaping past the few people who stood between us
and kneeling
at
her side
.
She turned
towards me with a blank stare
, her skin
glistening with beads
of sweat
and
reflecting the colors that flashed from lights around the room
.
I touched my hand to her cheek and it was burning up
.
“Turn off the music!” I yelled to those around me. “Someone get help!”  No one heard me as the deafening beat continued to pound through the room
.
Jane lay there flat on her back, her arms and head exposed to the shuffling feet around her
.
I shielded her body with mine to help protect her from getting trampled, hitting at the legs closest to us
.
“Call for help!” I yelled
again as I tried to get someone to notice what was going on
.

“Right on sister,” a guy
yelled with approval
, giving me a provocative look as I straddled Jane’s body.

“No!” I shouted
.
“She’s hurt!  Get help!” His face took on a look of recognition when he saw the vacant stare in Jane’s eyes
.
He tapped the guy next to him and pointed towards Jane.

“Someone’s hurt, we need to make a path
.”
The
sea of people around us
began to part as the guy helped me to hoist Jane up and move her toward the edge of the room.

“The cops!” someone shouted, and the
crowd
began to scatter in a chaotic frenzy
.
The guy helping to hold Jane up looked at me with
an
apology
in his eyes
.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t get in trouble
.
My parents will kill me.”

“Wait!” I said as he lowered his side of Jane’s body to the floor
.
But in a moment he was gone with the rest of the crowd
.
I kneeled to the floor, resting Jane’s head on my lap and running my hand over her damp forehead
.
I could tell she was trying to fall asleep to escape whatever it was that
was haunting her, but every now and then her eyes would jerk open in terror
.
“It’s going to be
okay,
” I told her, even though I knew she couldn’t hear me above the music
still pounding
around us in the darkened room.