A Wealth of Unsaid Words (14 page)

push of his chest. He tossed his head. Ally was too smart for

that. She had to know Everett was not the reason Everett

was still alone.

“I"m not afraid. Not of that.” Everett might have been

born a crusader, but he was no match for his mother.

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A Wealth of Unsaid Words • R. Cooper

“Then what is it? I know, I know, I"m being pushy, but I

want you to be happy. You aren"t seeing anyone, and I can"t

remember the last time you even mentioned anyone in your

life that wasn"t about work.”

“It was over a year ago, that I recall.” Robert spoke up

again, though he was choosing to be as big of a dick now as

his football buddies had once been. Maybe he wasn"t,

perhaps he had some other point in speaking, or just

thought it was time Everett got a lecture the way the others

did, but Alex missed it by not being able to see anyone"s face.

But if he"d been there, walked in right now, he was aware

that this would never have been said in front of him.

Because he wasn"t family, or because he could break again,

or because of what it might do to Everett.

“A year, Everett.”
He could hear his own voice, though,

in one of the adult moments between them without his

family around, in a conversation for the two of them alone. A

year, and Everett hadn"t….

Everett"s loud sigh broke into his thoughts.

“And I"m not getting any younger, I know. What am I

waiting for? Yes, Mom, I"ve heard it before.” But he didn"t

sound angry. Everett let out another breath, and it was tired

more than anything else, as though his head was down, and

his hands on the counter were the only things keeping him

on his feet.

“You make it sound so easy,” he added, “as though I

haven"t tried. As though my arms couldn"t get more open

or—”

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Alex was buffeted on all sides by the children as they

returned. They pounded through the door and into the

kitchen, shoving him to the side when he was in their way,

wanting their damn cocoa and to kick off their boots. He

wouldn"t have heard Everett"s last words if he had been

standing next to him. Their screaming continued for a few

moments, excited chatter and exclamations over their mugs

and marshmallows and coats that wouldn"t come off, and

then with a noise like a stampede they must have rushed

back out of the kitchen.

They only gave Everett a few moments of peace; then

Ally was back at him, firing away with gentle concern and

guilt.

“I never said it was easy. I only want—”

“Yeah, well I want a lot of things, too, Mom.” Despair

from Everett was not right. Alex sucked in a breath and put

his hand to the door. Another hand landed on top of his. He

jumped and turned and saw George.

George stared back at him, a measuring, hard stare, but

didn"t open the door. Alex studied him, though his heart rate

didn"t slow down at all, and waited, but George didn"t say a

word. His face was speaking for him, saying things about

bootstraps that had been harsh and wrong post-suicide

attempt, but were suddenly valid now, with Everett once

again in pain because of Alex.

So Alex nodded before quickly turning away to open the

door and step inside.

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He took some time to noisily wipe his feet and hang up

his coat and gloves, and when he looked up, everyone was

silent. Ally was pouring leftover cocoa into a heavy pitcher,

her attention apparently focused upon the task. Everett was

likewise busy with his rising bread dough, though he

murmured something to his father about keeping the cold

air out when George came in behind Alex.

Everett"s siblings and Rachel"s husband were sitting

around the nook, icing cookies. No one was speaking.

Alex looked back at Everett, at how slow and weary his

actions seemed, how red his face was. It could have been the

heat of the kitchen, but he didn"t think so. He stepped

forward.

“Crap, we have to get to the mall now if we"re going,”

Robert said suddenly and got up. Rachel nodded and yanked

on her husband"s arm.

“You coming?” she asked Alex, but didn"t wait for an

answer.

“I"m tired of the sight of cookies anyway.” Her husband

excused himself. Molly grinned and stole one and ate it. She

skipped out right as Ty was coming in and pushed him out

with her. George moved on, too, saying something to his

youngest about the mess that Molly pretended not to hear.

For a moment it was just Alex in the kitchen with

Everett and Ally, and then Ally put a lid on the pitcher and

turned back to them.

“I"ll make them all deliver them to the neighbors before

they go, if they"re finished.” Alex wasn"t sure if it was a

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promise or an order to finish icing the remaining cookies,

but she removed her apron and kissed Everett"s cheek when

he didn"t move, her movements slow for a second as though

it hurt her when he didn"t respond right away, and then

Everett glanced at her, and she could breathe again. Alex

knew that feeling and met her gaze.

He went still when she swooped over to plant a soft kiss

on his cheek as well, and felt the air leave him in a rush as

she hurried out of the room to straighten up before heading

to the mall with everyone else.

Alex advanced carefully into the room once they were

alone, aware that he and Everett had not left on the best

terms. But Everett didn"t say anything, just let Alex watch

him as he pulled his hair back and washed his hands and

slid down into the nook.

“Do you need help, Everett?” he asked at last. His voice

seemed too loud.

Everett"s laugh was tense and bitter for a moment, but

then he dropped his shoulders and glanced over.

“God yes,” he admitted, though it looked as if there

weren"t too many cookies left bare. Alex exhaled.

“You had only to ask.” He kept his voice low, almost a

stranger in a strange land, though he knew this kitchen well.

He had never had to ask Everett for anything before. Everett

laughed that harsh laugh again and shook his head, as

though something about Alex"s statement shouldn"t be funny

but was.

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“Oh, is that all? I thought I had.” He was possibly

joking, but Alex frowned, and Everett went back to his bread,

the set of his shoulders tense and unhappy.

Alex wasn"t sure if it was anger, but Everett didn"t say

anything else, and they worked together in silence while Alex

frosted the remaining cookies.

eace offering?” Alex held the heavy mug in front of

Everett"s face until Everett reached up and took it.

“P Sometime after lunch when he"d finally finished

baking, Everett had come into the living room to

rest his weary bones and take his turn to brood alone across

the distance by staring moodily into the fire. It was now

hours after dinner, and Everett had barely moved from the

overstuffed easy chair by the fireplace in all that time. Ally

had even brought him a plate out here, ignoring the sound of

Molly"s disbelief.

Alex looked over at Everett"s view. Aside from the

fireplace, it included the tree, redecorated yet again, and now

a messy jumble of ornaments mostly along the bottom

branches, and the couch and TV, which had most everyone"s

attention.

“We aren"t fighting, Alex.” Everett warily sniffed the

mug"s contents, and then widened his eyes and looked up

again.

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