Authors: Jerri Drennen
Tags: #Romance, #Suspense, #Thriller, #Contemporary
Anticipation tugged at his heart. He’d thought about her only a thousand times in the eight hours they’d been apart. He missed her confrontational mouth… her warm, inviting mouth. The thought of her honey-sweet lips made his body come to life. As he stood in front of her outer office, he took some deep, cleansing breaths, trying to get a handle on his desire.
Slowly, he opened the door… and found Hank asleep in a chair in front of Shiloh’s office.
Nick grinned. It’d be too easy just to wake him. He leaned over and clapped his hands together so loud that Hank leaped out of the chair, going straight for his gun before he recognized Nick.
“Whoa there.”
Hank scowled when his eyes focused on him. “Don’t you ever do that to me again. My heart almost stopped.”
Nick tried to look serious. “Are you supposed to be sleeping on the job?”
Hank flopped back into the chair. “She wore me out.”
“Who, Sandra?”
“No, the director. Did you know she can go for over an hour?”
“Huh?” Nick’s stomach dropped. He couldn’t mean what Nick thought he did.
“You know how I hate to run. She must have been on her college track team.”
Hank and Shiloh.
Right
. Hank was head over heels in love with Sandra and would never jeopardize their relationship for a quick lay.
He redirected the conversation. “What’s our director doing?”
“No clue. After our long, drawn-out run and showers, she wouldn’t talk, and when we got up here to the office, she closed her door and hasn’t come out since.”
“How long has it been?”
“Hours,” Hank answered, scratching his head.
Nick clapped Hank on the shoulder. “Go home. I’ll take it from here.”
“Gladly. Sandy’s waiting for me. I’m meeting her parents tonight.”
“You’re meeting the parents. It must be serious.”
Hank sighed, then nodded. “I love her. I want her to have my children. So, yeah, it’s serious.”
Nick grinned at him, thinking that a wife and kids sounded appealing to him as well. “I’m happy for you, Hank.”
“Really? I thought you’d tell me I was making a mistake getting tied down to just one woman.”
Nick frowned. “Why would you say that?”
“Because you’ve always been a free agent. A never-get-involved and a never-fall-in-love kind of guy.”
Hank was right. Nick used to think that way until Shiloh entered the picture. “A person can change, can’t they? Just promise me I’ll be your best man.”
Hank lightly punched at his shoulder. “Absolutely.”
“Good, now get lost and say hello to Sandy for me. ”
“Will do. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Hey, tomorrow’s Sunday. I’ll take your shift. You spend the day with your girl.”
“You’re a saint. Thanks.” Hank smiled, then grimaced. “Have fun with the director.”
Once Hank was gone, Nick knocked on Shiloh’s door and opened it to find her sitting at her desk, wiping her eyes. She’d obviously been crying. And wasn’t finished yet.
But why
?
Nick walked to her desk as she shielded her face with her hands. “You okay?”
“F… fine,” she said in a tone that immediately told Nick she was lying.
She wasn’t fine. She was upset, and for some reason he knew it was to do with him. What else was new? Hating him was a hobby of hers.
“Okay, what did I do this time?” Nick thought that getting to the point was the way to go.
She swiveled around in her chair, her attention diverted to the stark white wall.
This wasn’t good. At all.
Nick circled the desk and placed his hands firmly on the armrests of her chair to keep her from spinning again. “Shiloh, what the hell is wrong?”
“That’s Director Templar to you,” she said curtly.
Nick blood pressure skyrocketed. “Right. We’re back to that? Don’t you think that after what we’ve shared, I have a right to call you Shiloh?”
Her eyes connected with his. “You mean what you’ve shared with me and probably ten other women this past week. I believed you when you told me you hadn’t been with anyone for months. What a joke.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Hank told me about the date with your—girlfriend today. You lied to me.”
Nick shook his head. “I didn’t lie. Until today, I hadn’t seen Mia in months and we never slept together.”
She glared. “Why don’t I believe you? A man your age probably jumps from one bed to the next without any feelings of guilt.”
Nick closed his eyes, trying to hold his temper in check. “First of all, you were the one who used me, then told me to forget it ever happened. Besides, what do you care? You cut me loose, remember?”
“You know that we couldn’t continue this affair because of our positions. We could both lose our jobs.”
Nick studied her face. “So that’s all that is important to you? The job?”
“No, my father is too. But I worked very hard to get where I am, Nicholas. You can’t expect me to give that up for you… for a fling.”
He pushed away from her chair, sending it spinning around as he headed for the door. “No, I’ve learned not to expect anything from you. I understand you don’t return my feelings. I’ll wait in the outer office until you’re ready to go home.”
Nick’s heart ached and he didn’t want Shiloh to see him as weak. She wasn’t willing to risk anything for him and that told him everything he needed to know.
“Nicholas, wait.”
He heard her plea, but was too angry to respond. Instead he slammed the door behind him.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Shiloh winced when the door slammed, then swallowed the lump in her throat. What had just happened? And what did he mean when he said she didn’t return his feelings? Shouldn’t she be the one furious with the two-timing boy with a badge? Could she really trust that he hadn’t slept with this woman?
A revelation hit her. She was in love with this two-timing boy––no… man––with a badge.
In love. Oh my God. Shiloh, you’re insane
.
How could she be in love with Nicholas when she didn’t even like him?
Come on. Who was she kidding? That wasn’t true. Not only did she want him, she respected him. He was a good agent and she was lucky to have him on her team. Even with his smart mouth.
But now that she loved him, what was next? Did he really feel the same way? And if he did, could they make their relationship work? What about their careers? The age difference?
Shiloh picked a pencil off her desk and started tapping it aimlessly against her coffee cup. Could she and Nicholas work at DNS and have a normal relationship? She’d heard rumors that Flint Morgan and a former female agent had fraternized on the job, and neither had been fired. So why couldn’t she and Nicholas? Would it make a difference that she was his boss?
Maybe she should talk to Danfield about it.
What was she thinking? He’d probably fire her on the spot. The whole situation was impossible.
Okay, so she loved Nicholas, but was that love strong enough to withstand all the ridicule they’d receive? She could hear the ribbing now: Isn’t he too young for you? The boy-toy reference would also be mentioned. How would she handle being called a cougar? Was she willing to accept what came with a relationship with Nick?
What if they dealt with all the ribbing and it didn’t work out anyway? What if they both realized they had nothing in common besides great sex?
She groaned. Why was she doing this to herself? All these what-ifs could be asked of any two people in love. Why not take a chance and try for the happily ever after? After all, hadn’t she sacrificed enough in the name of her career? Why shouldn’t she be able to have a life with a husband and children?
Children. There was another issue. Would Nicholas want kids? She was thirty-five, her time for having babies was running out. What if he wasn’t ready to take on that kind of responsibility yet?
Shiloh threw the pencil down and sighed.
What should I do if I have the choice
?
Go for the white picket fence
?
Or continue the way I’ve been
?
Their magical night came rushing back in all its glory and she knew the answer to her question. She wanted Nicholas and all the good and bad that came with him.
Jumping up, she rushed to get to him, running over the things she wanted to say.
She opened the door slowly, her heart beating a wild rhythm.
The instant she saw Nicholas, she knew something was wrong. He was on his cell phone—his face white as a ghost. Who was he talking to? What was going on?
He ended the call and looked at her, inhaling deeply. “Hank’s on his way to Washington Center. Security found him next to your car. He’s been shot.”
Shiloh’s breath caught in her throat. “Oh my God. How bad is it?”
“He took one in the chest,” he managed to say. “I need to call Sandy.”
Shiloh clutched his shoulder. “I’ll call her on the way to the hospital. Let’s go.” Raw emotion showed in Nicolas’ eyes. Tears welled in hers, but she brushed them away to punch in Sandra’s number. Right now Nicholas needed her to be strong for him.
Nick weaved in and out of traffic lanes, his mind replaying the last conversation he’d had with Hank. Hell, the man was like a brother to him. Why hadn’t he ever told him that? If he died, he’d never get the chance.
According to security, Hank had struggled to tell them the man who shot him had been tampering with Shiloh’s car. Hank tried to stop him.
Nick seethed. When he got hold of this guy, he was going to kill him with his bare hands. He could see his fingers wrapped around this faceless man’s throat, choking the life out of him. He silently promised Hank, if it took a lifetime, he’d see that the man paid for the harm he’d done.
He pulled into the hospital’s parking area and they rushed through the entrance, quickly making their way to the front desk.
Nick flashed his badge. “Hank Dawson was brought in with a bullet to the chest. Can you tell me anything about his condition?”
A blond nurse sitting behind the counter picked up the phone and pressed a button. Nick heard her mumble something, then she placed the phone back in its cradle. “He’s in surgery right now. That’s all I can tell you.”
“Thanks.”
As they turned, Sandy ran through the emergency entrance with an older couple at her side. Tears streamed down her cheeks and her vivid blue eyes were huge with fear.
“How is he, Nick?” The panic in her voice clogged his throat.
“All they can tell me is that he’s in surgery.”
He pulled Sandy into his arms and held her, until she drew back. “He’ll be all right, won’t he? I can’t live without him, Nick.”
“He’s strong.” Nick’s voice cracked and he tried to clear it, hoping she couldn’t see the worry in his eyes. He didn’t know the answer to her question. Only Hank and God knew, and Nick prayed that both would choose life instead of death for him.
“These are my parents. ”
“Hello. Sorry we had to meet under these circumstances, ” Nick said, smiling weakly at them.
“Let’s sit down.” Shiloh grasped Sandy’s hand and led Sandy and her parents to the waiting area.
Nick found it impossible to do the same. Instead, he paced, angry that he hadn’t prevented this somehow. Hank wouldn’t be fighting for his life had he caught the shooter that day in the DNS parking garage. Or if Nick hadn’t been chosen for the night shifts. Why hadn’t he worked harder to find out who the guy was? He should have asked more questions, especially of Shiloh.
Nick raked his hands through his hair in frustration.
“Shiloh, can I talk to you?”
Shiloh patted Sandy’s hand, then rose and walked to him.
“Would you like me to go to the cafeteria and get some coffee?” She touched his arm.
“Not now,” he said, rubbing his chin. “Do you have any idea who this shooter is?”
Her face paled. “No. Why?”
“Because my partner is lying on an operating table right now, that’s why. Could it be an ex-boyfriend of yours or someone you’ve crossed?”
Shiloh grimaced. “No!”
Nick frowned. “That was a fast response. Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.”
“Okay, how about a criminal you put away while at the CIA? Could it be anyone there? Somebody that threatened to get even with you?”
She shifted from one foot to the other. “Not a criminal.”
“Shiloh, what?”
“There was a fellow agent that I—ah.”
Nick clutched her upper arms. “What?”
“I brought a sexual harassment suit against him and a restraining order was put in place.”
“Why didn’t you disclose this before now? Could he be the shooter?”
She shook her head. “He lives in Seattle, Nicholas.”
“That doesn’t mean squat.” Nick unclipped his phone. “What’s this guy’s name.”
“Grady Sheppard, but like I said, he’s in Seattle.”
“He was CIA?”
“Yes, but I wasn’t the only woman who filed a grievance against him. A woman in Dallas filed a suit as well.”
“What did he do to you?” Nick asked.
She blushed and hung her head.
Nick forced her chin up with his hand and repeated his question. “What did he do, Shiloh?”
“It was very degrading. He slapped my behind, and brushed up against me every chance he could. He was a married man and it didn’t matter that I had no interest in him.”
Nick knew she wasn’t telling him everything. “Why the restraining order?”
She tried to pull away from him, but he grasped her arm tighter.
“I don’t want to talk about this.”
Nick refused to let her go. For her sake, he needed to know what he was up against, if indeed this was the man trying to kill her.
“Tell me,” he insisted.
“The suit I brought against him destroyed his marriage. He blamed me for the loss of his wife and children. I left the office one evening and he was waiting for me. He told me if he was going to lose everything because of me, he was going to get something in return.” Tears filled her willow eyes. “I don’t want to rehash this Nick. It’s too painful.”
“Did he rape you?” Nick managed to ask through an emotionally clogged throat.