Ain't no hitta like the one I got: part one (6 page)

“I want to know tonight”, he said pulling back and looking at me. “How about when we get in the car you tell me.”

“Ok Jason.” He smiled, and kissed my hand.

“That ladies and gents will be the last dance for the evening, Thank you all for being a part of our Spring Fling home coming dance.”

We all claps and looked at each other and Jason grabbed my hand and lead me outside. Our limo was waiting for us, and he opened the door and we got in. In was real warm and cozy inside and Jason moved in close and put his arm around me. “You know how much I am feeling you Willemena right?”

“Yes Jason.”

“So I don’t understand what’s so hard about you saying you would be my girl.”

“Jason, I just don’t know right now, so much is going on, I don’t think I could be what you want right now, so the answer is going to be no, but I like being friends with you.”

He dropped his arm from my shoulder, and we were quiet for the rest of the ride. When the Limo pulled up to the building, I looked at Jason but he was looking in the opposite direction out of the window.

“I am sorry,” I told him but he didn’t respond so I just got out of the car and the limo sped away.

I went into the building and when I got into the apartment, everything was dark and quiet, so I assumed everybody had left, but when I turned the lights on, Paper was sitting on the couch looking somber and I could tell from that expression that something wasn’t right.

“Paper what’s wrong?” I asked sitting my purse and keys on the table, I saw some happy birthday balloons, flowers and cupcakes on the table, by I bypassed them and went over to Paper.

“It’s grand ma.”

“What about her?” I sat down on the couch preparing for the worst.

“She’s in the hospital, she had a mild heart attack, I left because I just couldn’t stand seeing her like that will all of those tube hooked up to her. I got you those balloons and shit from the hospital gift shop on my way out.”

Tears fell from his eyes and I moved in close, to wipe them.

“Thank you for the balloons Paper and it’s going to be ok; I consoled him, “She’s going to be ok, I am going to pray for her and everything is going to be ok, I promise.”

“Yo Willemena, she is all that I got, I can’t lose my Grandma.”

“You got me, Paper; everything is going to be ok.”

“Can I have you?” He said, his lips crushed into mines, tasting like tears and beer, I sat up on his lap, Filled with emotion and I kissed him on his neck, “Take me, I been telling you I am yours,” I whispered to him as I unbuckled his pants and he let me, when I pulled his dick out, it was real firm and long, and I was a little scared. He was grabbing my thighs and then he touched my ass so softly that I wanted to melt. “I need you Willemena, please don’t leave me, I am sorry about what I said before, I don’t know what I would really do if you would of walked out.”

My nipples and everything was throbbing so much just from him being vulnerable to me and saying that he wanted me, that I lifted up my body and position my pussy to sit down on his dick, but just the slight tap of pressure hurt and his dick wouldn’t even go in, my pussy was shut, I cried out in pain, and moved myself.

I looked at Paper in the dim light, He took off my dress gently as I raised my hands in the air., he lifted me up and carried me into the bedroom, laid me down and took my panties off. He gently sucked on my titties while playing with my clit, and I thought that I was going to go crazy with how he made my body feel. When he went down and put his mouth on my pussy, I shuddered out in desire, he was going around in circles making my pussy real wet and sucking gently on my throbbing clit, just when I was about to come, he moved up and rubbed the head of his dick against my pussy, and I screamed out in pleasure and he pushed is dick into my hole at the same time. At first it wouldn’t go in but he pushed in a little more, “I want you, and I want this pussy”, he said as he pushed a little deeper and his dick went in a little more, “I want you to belong to me”, he pushed and it went in deeper, “Zzzzz, pussy locking up on my dick so right, give me this pussy, let me in.”

I slowly starting throwing the pussy at him, without noticed I felt myself riding this wave and my body tightened up and started to shake again,

“That’s right rain on my dick, oh my God, I am about to nut,” he pulled out and jerked his dick on the bed, and when he finished, he held me from behind, and said into my ear, “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“You ain’t ever going to leave me right?”

He sounded like a little boy, “No, I won’t.” And we slept just like that. The next morning he was still holding me behind, when he felt me stir, he kissed on my back, then he squeezed my nipples, and his hands slide down my stomach and too my wet pussy and then I felt him slip his dick inside of my pussy but this time my pussy welcome him and I was throwing it back on his dick.

“ZZZZZ, this fucking wet tight ass pussy got me about to nut all early”, he said pulling out his dick that was already shooting sperm everywhere. We showered together and I told him that I wanted to stay home and go to the hospital with him to see his grandmother but he made me go to school. We took the bus, and he walked me to the door and kissed me. When I got in the building, I was just dumb happy, it felt like the sun was shining on me at all times, I felt light headed and carefree, I guess I can owe that feeling to losing my virginity, I smirked to myself as I put my books in my locker and closed it.  Just as I looked up, Jason and Shawna approached me, and bumped into me real hard. I looked at Jason and he smirked.

“Look baby”, Shawna turned to Jason, “These bitches in this school don’t know how to look where they are going.”

“I can tell.”

I was kind of stunt for two reasons, one, that Jason was with Shawna and two, that Shawna would still fuck with me after what happened last time. Without a second thought I punched Shawna in her face, and we started going at it, she was pulling on my hair and I was fucking her up, I took a slight punch to the head, but it was nothing like the shit I was raining down on her. Before I knew it, the dean and the security guards were breaking us up, and I found myself in the principal’s office. I don’t know what was going to happen, this is my Senior year, so I definitely wasn’t trying to fuck up, I only had three more months left in this bitch before I graduate, so I was sitting there biting my nails like crazy trying to figure out what was next. When I got into the office, the principle looked at me with disappointment, “Willemena, what is going on with you, I never had any issues out of you before, is everything ok?”

“Everything is fine”, I told Mrs. Eddison, “It was just a misunderstanding.”

“Well I am going to still have to call your mother to come pick you up.”

At the sound of those words, my heart started to beat rapidly as she dialed my mother’s number right in front of me. “Yes, Mr. Bradworth? Your daughter had a fight at school, I guess it’s best that we dismiss her for the rest of the day; can you please come to the school and pick her up? Ok thank you.”

“Listen Willemena, go sit outside in the office until your mother comes, I am letting you off this time with a warning, but if this happens again, I am going to have to suspend you and withdraw you from participating in graduation.”

“It won’t happen again,” I reassured her as I walked out of the office and took a seat. Dam that bitch done called my mother, I haven’t seen her in about three months, and I didn’t even know how to feel right now, happy or sad.

After about thirty minutes, she walked into the office and signed me out, and I looked at her, she still looked the same. Same chocolate flawless complexion, beautiful hair cut into a bob, and thick body. I wanted to run into her arms, cry and tell her that I have changed, but I was scared, and I knew better. We both quietly walked out of the door. Once we were outside she turned to me, “Are you alright? What the fuck was you even fight about? Did she hurt you?”

“Nah mama, I am good, and I don’t know why we were fight, she started it.”

She looked at me and touched my hair, and then she dropped her hand and looked away. “Where have you been staying?”

“With a friend.”

“Look, I am fucking sorry, for what happened alright? But you gotta learn and that’s the only way I knew how.”

Dam why did she have to curse, I thought to myself, the funny thing was that I didn’t feel that connection anymore, that dependency that I use to have for her.

“Look if you wanna come back, you can.”

I just looked at her; she didn’t say that she wanted me back, hell I could tell from the way that she said it that she really didn’t mean it. I didn’t want to go back to a place that people didn’t really want me. Paper wanted me and he told me that.

“Nah, I am good where I am at.”

“Ok, well happy belated birthday,” she said almost with relief.

“Thank” I said, and I turned around and walked away, I can’t believe that she didn’t come looking for me after she threw me out, and I just really felt empty towards her, after I took a few steps away from her, I willed myself not to cry, bitch be strong, don’t let her see that you are weak, you better not cry, I walked holding my breath, until I got to the bus stop, and I let it all come out. I then walked pasted the bus stop and decided to walk home. When I got in and I seen Paper, I ran to him and started to cry. He didn’t ask me any questions, just took me into his room, closed the door and made love to me until I fell asleep.

One gone, one received

It was about 7am in the morning and I was a couple blocks away from Tiffany’s house, the neighborhood wasn’t really awake yet and was just trying to come alive. I had to meet her over here early so that we could drive to the abortion clinic together because today was her appointment. She and I both knew that we weren’t ready for no kids together and my life wasn’t all the way together yet to finance no child, so we were both doing what was best for us. When I knocked on the door and she answered, her eyes were puffy, red and shit, and I exhaled and thought to myself that I hope that this bitch don’t start with the theatrics. We already said what we were going to go; I hope that this bitch doesn’t change her mind.

“Are you ready?” I asked her quietly.

“Yeah let me get my coat,” she said running back in the house. I stood outside and looked around, and she came back out in no time. We hopped in the car and made our way to the city, the ride there was pretty much quiet. When we pulled up to the clinic and parked, there she was with that somber expression again.

“Listen Tiffany we are doing the right thing, we have our whole life to plan for kids, we are just getting to know each other, my life is not together right now, we are both young,” I rubbed her back for emphasis, “We are going to get through this together baby, I promise, “ I said tilting her chin up. I hope all of this tender shit was working because I am ready for this shit to be over with so that I can get on with my life. This bitch acting like she ain’t do this shit before when I am sure she did, the way I saw shorty act around all of those dudes the night I met her at the club, she had to be accustomed to shit like this. We paid for parking, and went inside of the clinic. When her name was called, I waited out in the waiting room for like four hours. I wondered how my grandmother was doing and I also wondered about Willemena. Dam have you ever just been feeling somebody, and you just had that chemistry with them and it was just unexplained? That’s how I felt about shorty. I loved the fact that I knew she was home waiting for me. On some real g shit, I really just wanted to go home, smoke an L and fuck shorty. I really didn’t want to be here around these sad ass people, and in this stupid ass situation. I looked around the waiting room and this shit was packed. I went outside to get a breath of fresh air. When I looked around, I saw Billboards posted about college, and job opportunities, I really wanted to better myself and get my shit together. I even thought about seeing my father in jail, and finally finding it in my heart to forgive that nigga for what he did to my mom. I guess falling in love will do that to you, that shit will have you revaluating your whole life. I love Willemena, from the moment I first saw her on those stairs, I didn’t know it then but I wanted to love and protect her, and I felt in some strange way that I needed her too. As far as Tiffany goes, I have fun with her, but just the way that I met her has me second guessing shit, I just felt like it’s a fuck thing with her, I just feel like she is sneaky and I can’t trust her. I went back in the clinic just in time because Tiffany was just walking out from behind the double doors. I hugged her and she laid her head on my shoulders.

“You good Tiffany?”

Yeah, just drive me home, Paper,” She said giving me the keys to her car.

I drove her home, and I made sure that she was comfortable in the bed, and she fell asleep instantly, I stayed there for a little with her and then I left, and took the train back home. Before I got to my building, I copped me a bag of weed and some rollup from the store and then I went in the building. I checked on my grandmother in her room and she was sleeping, and when I went in my room, Willemena was sitting up in the bed looking upset.

“Yo, what’s wrong?” I asked her.

“Where you been Paper?”

“Out.”

“Out where? With that girl that’s pregnant?”

She had her arms folded and she had a frown on her face, but she was so beautiful, I really wish she would stop tripping, if she only knew how I felt about her, she would stop.

“Yeah I was with shorty, but it’s not what you think. I took her to go get the abortion,” I said while rolling up a blunt.

“Oh are you cool about that?” She said me.

Fuck does she mean am I cool. Shit, I great, I wasn’t trying to have no seeds with that bitch.

“Yeah, I am good, what about you?”

“Yeah, I am ok, I didn’t tell you but I had a fight at school the other day, and I saw my mother. She asked me if I wanted to come home.”

“Word?” I sparked up the L, “What did you tell her?” I took that first pull and it felt good and had my head feeling right, this is that good shit right here, I thought to myself.

“I told her no, and that I was good where I was at.”

“I am glad to hear that,” I looked at Willemena and she was looking sexy as fuck. I love when she wear those tight wife beaters with her big titties smushed up in them like that, it made my dick so hard.

“What are you looking at?” She asked me.

“You,” I said high as fuck.

She walked over to the chair that I was sitting at, and unzipped my pants, and took my dick out. I thought she was going to fuck me, but she got on her knees, held it and slide her tongue up my shaft.

“Zzzzzz, shorty stop, you don’t have to do that.” I felt like dicking sucking were for the hoes to do, I really didn’t want Willemena to get on her knees for me.

“I want to”, Paper she said looking at me. She put my dick in her mouth and slowly made it disappear. I closed my eyes, and took a strong pull on the blunt and then I put it out. “Come here shorty,” She got up and I took her panties down and picked her up and put her gently on my dick, ahhhh, her shit swallowed me up and fit me like a glove, I am never felt no pussy that felt this good. “ZZZz, ride me girl, go up and down just like that, ahhhh, fucking pussy juice sliding down my dick, “ I said as I lifted up her shirt and nursed on her big ass titties, she had some big ass nipples and I loved it. I sat back in the chair and moved her up and down, and then I lifted her off my dick because it felt like I was about to bust, after a few seconds, I put her back on my dick, but the way her wet pussy was swallowing me up, I got only a few more strokes in before, my dick was throbbing in her. So I pulled out just in time because there was nut everywhere. “Dam you got some good ass pussy, that Nyquil type shit, cause a nigga about to lay down and go right to sleep, she laughed and we curled up together, I heard my phone lightening up with texts, but I ignored that shit, and went her on to sleep.

The next morning, I saw like 20 texts from Tiffany talking about her stomach is cramping up and she need me to come over there and be with her. I waited until Willemena was off to school and then I headed over there to Long island to sit with her for a while. When I got to Tiffany’s crib, she was complaining of cramps and bleeding, so I chilled and watched Netflix, and sparked an L, and smoked that. She ended up smoking with me, and trying to suck my dick, but I didn’t even want head from her, see, that’s how you know these be bitches be with the theatrics, how is she saying her stomach is cramped up and shit, but yet, she wanna suck some dick? Come on that doesn’t even make any sense. I looked at Tiffany and shook my head, “Listen, I need to be heading home in a few, I have things that I gotta do, I need to try and find a job and shit and I gotta check on my grandma.”

“Please Paper stay for a couple more hours, if you need some money, I can give you a couple of hundreds, go in my bag over there and take out three hundred.”

“Nah, I am good, Tiffany here you are trying to bribe a nigga and shit.”

“Please Paper; I need you here with me”. She got up, and got the money out of the bag, and put it in my pocket, and she ended up pulling out my dick and sucking it anyways. I nutted in her mouth and she swallowed everything. I ended up smoking another L with her, and I headed to the train station back to NY. When I got back to Brooklyn, I ended up going to Pitkin Avenue and buying  Willemena an iPhone with the money that Tiffany so that she could keep in touch with me, and tell me how my grandmother was doing when I wasn’t home. When I got home and gave it to her, she was dumb happy. She took a picture of us and saved it as her lock screen. I loved my shorty, and I wanted to do everything for her that I could. That night as we laid in bed, she asked me where I saw myself at in three years, I said, “With you.”

“Where do you see yourself Willemena?”

“With you and in college, I wanna go to Florida State University and I want to take up journalism.”

I looked at the shadows that played on the wall from the passing cars from the streets below and I held shorty in my arms even tighter.

“What happened to your mother Paper, why isn’t she here with us?”

I was quiet for a minute, “My pops used to beat her when I was little, and he ended up killing her. He’s upstate now doing life for that shit. I never forgave him for that. But that anger is eating me up, recently I have been thinking that I need to let that shit go and talk to that nigga. He is already paying his dues by being away from society; he doesn’t need me hating him to. And besides, I love you too much that there is no room for hate inside of me.”

She looked at me and touched my lips and then she kissed me. “Maybe I need to make peace with my mother, maybe one day. Not right now because the time isn’t right.”

I kissed her forehead and we went to bed like that.

                It’s been two months passed, and things were going ok, My grandma, has been back and forth in the hospital, but she hasn’t really had any bad heart attack episodes so that’s good, and Willemena will be graduating from high school next week. Today, I was on the bus heading up state to see my pops and shit. I fell like it is long overdue. I haven’t seen that nigga since I was 7 years old, so this step right here was difficult. Me and my grandmother don’t even fuck with his family, that’s how bad things were after he killed my moms and shit. I don’t know, I just really wanted to close this chapter in my life and shit. That’s partially why I didn’t want to have no kids out of with just any random chick because I wanted the bond with my child to be strong, and I want the mother to be someone that I really respect. I looked out of the window and watched the city turned to rural areas, and I dozed off a bit, but I was upstate in what seemed like no time. When I got off the bus and get to the facility, I followed the proper protocol, and then I was able to wait in the waiting room, until my pops came out. He looked way different than I remembered him as a child; nigga was more buff and had a beard. When he sat down, we just looked at each other.

“My son, you are looking well. I am glad that you decided to take this opportunity to come visit,” He said looking at me.

I was silent. So he continued, “My son, I just want to say that I am sorry for what I did, it was the unspeakable, and I know that there is nothing that I can do to bring your mother back, but I want you to know that every day I am living in grief and hell, for the crime that I have committed and I am sorry.” I looked at his hands that were bruised, and then I looked back at his face.

“I forgive you”, I said, and I got up and walked out and waited at the bus stop with the rest of the people. There’s was no need to fraternize with him or tell him about my life because he didn’t deserve that. I just wanted to hear that he was sorry and I wanted to forgive him and release the pain that I have held inside of me for so long.  When I got back to Brooklyn, it felt like a weight had been lifted off of me, and I got in the house Willemena was in the room looking moody. For the last month she and I haven’t been getting along, she was always laying around upset about this or that and eating. I don’t know what the fuck was wrong with her. I stood in the doorway, looking at how fucked up she had my room looking.

“Yo Willemena what I told you about this shit, this room is wild dirty. I am not sleeping in this shit.”

“Then nigga don’t sleep in it,” She said unbothered as she stuck a chicken nugget in her mouth.

“Those niggas in your school must have really had your head gassed up and shit because you have been acting real funny style lately, and if I catch you with one of them young niggas you are going to be sorry.”

“What eva, nigga you look sorry right now.”

I stood in front and I put my hand to her temple, “Don’t you ever disrespect me like that again in your fucking life.” I told her in a tight voice.

“Don’t you put your hands on me Paper,” she screamed, and slammed the door, and then I heard her crying and talking to someone on the phone.

I went in the living room; I don’t know how much more of this shit I could take. Willemena has been acting real crazy lately, it’s been one week since we ain’t fuck and my dick was going crazy, all we do is argue, and all she does is sleep and stay in bed when she’s not in school, and I can’t take it. I took out my phone and I texted Tiffany, “Aye what’s good.”

She said, “You. Do you want to come see me?”

“Yeah, I am on my way.” I grabbed my jacket and bounced the fuck out of there. I didn’t need this shit, let that bitch be miserable by herself, Fuck that. When I got to Tiffany’s crib, you had a bag of smoke waiting for me, so we rolled that shit up and I got so fucked up, I was just dazed out on her bed feeling good.

“Paper let me get some dick, you know me and you ain’t fuck since I had that abortion.”

“I know, and I ain’t trying to fuck with you like that unless we use a condom or you are on the pill, because I ain’t trying to put you through that anymore,” I said blowing out smoke.