All Things Lost (45 page)

     “I'll wait out here,” Kane said quickly.

     “I'll stay with Kane,” I volunteered.

     “This will probably take a while,” Steve said with a sigh as he started for the door.

     We stood there for a minute and then suddenly Kane said, “Let's go for a walk. I don't want to just stand here like this.”

     I shrugged and fell into step beside Kane as he wandered down towards the river.

     “I never believed in ghosts before now, you know?” he babbled as we walked. “I just thought it was all a bunch of crap: God, life after death, all that. It just thought it was all myths and stuff left over from when people were ignorant and didn't understand science. They teach you all this stuff in school that contradicts so much of the Bible. I know Dad believes in God and stuff but it's almost like his own religion and it's just one I never bought into. And now I feel like I've just been hit up-side the head with a two-by-four. I mean, I didn't see her myself, but I believe you did. I heard you scream. And then I heard the footsteps and the baby crying. It wasn't just my imagination. I don't care what Dad says.”

     While he was talking we walked along the river and past the site where the docks were being built. It was obvious he wasn't looking for any explanation, there wasn't any. He just needed to verbalize the things that were swirling out of control in his mind. And verbalize he did.

     Eventually I began to tune him out, my mind switched to looking around as we walked. We were approaching the edge of the wooded area that was yet to be cleared. While the undergrowth was still heavy at ground level under the trees, much of the high weeds, small shrubs and wild blackberry bushes that had made up a kind of thicket around the perimeter of the woods had been mowed down. As a result we were able to get closer to the trees than I'd ever been before. We were skirting the edge of the woods when I spotted something that caught my eye.

     “What's that?” I asked, interrupting Kane and stopping abruptly.

     “What's what?” Kane asked as he peered into the woods, trying to see what I was talking about.

     “There,” I said, pointing to an oddly shaped lump covered over in vines. “It looks like a statue or something.”

     “I don't see any-oh, that. It's probably just a tree stump or something,” Kane said nervously. “Adam and Steve are probably ready now. Let's go.”

     “No, wait. I want to see what it is.” I felt strangely drawn to the vine-swathed form. I started into
criss
-crossed mass of brambles that made it almost impossible to move under the trees. The thorny vines scratched and clawed at me with every step, pulling at my clothes and slashing across my flesh. I ignored the scratches and cuts I was receiving, disentangling myself as necessary, and kept pushing forward. As I got closer I could see that I was right, it was definitely more than just a tree stump; it looked like it might even be made of stone. But why would there be a statue this far away from the house?
An old garden, maybe?

     I was concentrating on the statue so hard I wasn't looking down; suddenly I ran into something about knee high and found myself falling face first into the briars. I scrambled up to see what I had fallen over. It was a grave stone. Its face had been grown over with lichen and moss but I could still make out the name easily enough: Thomas
Marnien
. The date under the name read 1858. I realized that I had found the grave of the child Steve had told us about, the one that had died as a baby. I wasn't in a garden, it was a private cemetery.

     “Killian, are you ok?” Kane called.

     “Yeah, I'm fine.” I called back. I'd almost forgotten he was even there. A trickle of sweat dropped into my eye and I swiped at it distractedly, wiping it on my shorts.

     “Come out now, please?”

     “Just a minute, Kane,” I snapped. He was starting to annoy me. All I could think about was the statue.

     I started for the figure again; it was now only a few feet away now. I reached out and began pulling the vines away from the stone. They were surprisingly strong and stubborn. I realized that to really clear them away I would have to cut them. I did manage to pull them aside enough to figure out what the statue was.

     It was a beautifully carved female angel, her eyes closed, her hands held in front of her in a mournful pose, her wings folded reverently behind her. As I backed slowly away from the statue I noticed another gravestone off to one side, larger than the one I'd fallen over. It was carved differently, the top domed and with a carving of a weeping willow over the name that I couldn't quite make out from here. I knew that this was what I was really supposed to find. I made my way over to it and knelt down, gently pulling away the vines.

     “
Amalie
Marnien
,” it read, “Wife of Captain Elijah
Marnien
, Lost At Sea. Born
May 5, 1833
, Died March 1862.”

     Now I knew where
Amalie
was buried. I noticed the lack of an exact date on the stone and wondered what that meant.

     “Killian, please, can we go now? I think I hear Adam and Steve calling us,” Kane called plaintively. I stood up without a sound and started fighting my way out.

     When I emerged from the trees, Kane's already wide eyes grew even wider. “What happened in there?” he gasped.

     “What do you mean?” I asked.

     “You're all bloody,” he said.

     “I am?” I looked down at my hand and saw drying blood smeared across my fingers. I realized the sweat I had been wiping out my eyes was actually blood. “I must have gotten scratched up on the briars,” I said.

     “You look like you barely escaped alive. What was in there?”

     “
Graves
,” I said and Kane gave an involuntary shudder.
“
Amalie's
and her son that died as a baby.”

     “Great, just what we needed to complete the whole haunted house set-up. We've got the creepy old house, the strange footsteps, the crying baby, and now the forgotten graveyard. What's next?
Bats in the belfry?
Chains clanking at night?”

     “Kane, settle down. It's just a private cemetery. It's not a big deal. I thought Adam and Steve were calling.”

     “I just said that to get you out of there. I was getting
creeped
out.”

     I sighed and started back for the house, just as we really did hear someone call our names. We took off at a jog and soon rounded the corner of the house. Adam and Steve were waiting by the car. Adam looked a little calmer and less disgruntled then when I'd seen him last, at least until he got a good look at me.

     “What the hell happened to you?” he asked when he took in my disheveled and bloody appearance. Steve just stared open-mouthed.

     “I found
Amalie's
grave,” I said triumphantly.

     “And tangled with a homicidal weed-whacker wielding skeleton?”

     
“No, just a briar patch that would have made Uncle
Remus
proud.”

     “You found
Amalie's
grave?” Steve asked, my scratches momentarily forgotten, at least by him.

     
“Yeah, in the woods where they haven't cleared yet.
There's her grave, her son that died as a baby and a big angel statue.”

     “My God, you've got to be kidding. I can't believe
Victoria
didn't mention this when she was showing the house.”

     “Maybe she forgot.” I suggested.

     “It's more likely that she didn't know about it. You can deal with that tomorrow.” Adam observed. “Now let's get you home and put something on all those scratches, you look like you've survived a war…barely.”

     We piled into the car, after Adam warned me to be careful and try not to get blood on the car upholstery, and headed for home.

     Once there, Adam dragged me into the bathroom and, after making me strip to my boxers, proceeded to douse my entire body with hydrogen peroxide. The scratches really weren't as bad as they looked only all the dirt and blood were washed away, although they stung like crazy.

     I'd just gotten redressed in clean clothes when Steve called up the stairs to me, “Killian, someone is here to see you.”

     I trotted down the steps wondering who could be coming to see me; half hoping it was Micah. It wasn't. I came to a sudden stop half-way down when I saw Asher standing by the front door. We stared at each other for a moment then I turned and wordlessly started back up the stairs.

     “Killian, wait,” he called out, “Please.”

     I kept going but he was right behind me.

     “Please, Killian. Give me a chance to explain.”

     “What's to explain?” I spat out in a dangerously controlled voice as I whirled around to look down at him from the top of the stairs. “You moved on, now get out of my life and let me do the same.”

     “I don't want to get out of your life.”

     “Well too fucking
bad
, because I don't want you in my life anymore.” I spun around and tried to shut the door to my room before he could follow me but he slipped his foot in the door just as I slammed it.

     “Killian, at least let me tell you what happened. You owe me that at least.”

     “I don't owe you anything. Can't you see that? We're over. I should have seen it a long time ago,
then
it wouldn't have hurt like hell to see you kissing Caleb the other day.”

     “That's just it. I wasn't kissing Caleb, he was kissing me.”

     “Yeah, and you looked positively horrified.”

     “Just open the door and let me talk, for God's sake! What are we, little kids?”

     With a growl, I let go of the door and stalked across the room to stand at the window, my back to Asher. I heard him come across the room to stand behind me.

     “Look, Killian, things between us haven't been good in a long time. We both know that. We were over months ago, we just couldn't admit it. When we broke up, I thought it was definitely over. Then I started missing you. We'd been together for so long I didn't know what to do without you. I was really confused. And to make matters worse you suddenly started trying to get back together. I didn't know what to do. I didn't think there was much point in us trying to get back together when none of the things that we broke up for had been resolved. It seemed better to just move on.

     “I wasn't interested in Caleb romantically, he was just a friend. That's all I ever thought of him as. I wanted to help him out, that's all. And then…I don't know…it started to change. That was the first time we ever kissed, the day you saw us. We were talking and then all of a sudden he kissed me. I was surprised, I really was. I didn't plan it, it just happened. And then you were there and…”

     “And I interrupted.”

     “I went after you but you tore out of there like a bat out of hell. And then you wouldn't accept any of my phone calls. What was I supposed to do? I'm sorry I barged in on you like this but couldn't leave things like that. You were my best friend for so long.”

     
“Were.
Past tense.”

     “I miss you, Killian. I want to be friends again.”

     I sighed heavily and finally turned to face him, letting him see the tear tracks on my face.

     “I can't do that, Asher. Not now, maybe not ever. It hurts too much.”

     “I don't want to lose you, Killian. I feel like there's been a hole inside me ever since we broke up. Maybe we weren't meant to be a couple, but I can't stand to not have you in my life at all.”

     I sat down on the edge of Kane's bed. “I'm starting to heal, starting to move on. Who knows what the future hold? I sure as hell don't. Maybe we will be friends again someday, I don't know. Right now I can't see it. I just want…I want to be left alone. I want time to heal without having you around to poke at the wound.”

     “Ok,” he said, sounding utterly miserable, “I guess I can see that. I'm sorry it happened like this, Killian.”

     
“Me too.
I hope you and Caleb are happy together.”

     “We're not really together, you know. I don't want to rush into anything else right now.”

     “Whatever,” I said listlessly. It's not like I really cared about hearing his plans for his love life at the moment.

     “I hope you find someone, too, Kill. You deserve to be happy.”

     I looked up at him, and saw the pain I felt reflected in his eyes. “Just not with you,” I said sadly and turned away. I heard the door close on his way out.

Chapter 26