Am I Boring My Dog? (13 page)

Have protective leather gloves, clean towels, and a blanket on hand, too.

Before trying to examine your dog so you can describe her symptoms to the emergency vet, muzzle her.
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When in pain, your ordinarily laid-back pup might lash out with her teeth. You won’t be much help to her if you require medical assistance yourself.

First-aid classes and videos, especially those demonstrating CPR, are useful, but—except for keeping your dog still if you fear bone breaks or internal injury or trying to stop profuse bleeding by applying pressure—you should generally avoid doing anything without the advice of the professional whose number you’ll have on hand.

One exception: As I’ve mentioned, dogs eat weird stuff all the time, so it’s useful to know that you can perform a doggie Heimlich procedure. Just be sure your dog is actually choking, as opposed to having breathing problems: signs include pawing at the face and throat and attempting to cough, as well as blue lips.

When you’re certain your dog’s throat is obstructed …

I don’t recommend doing this in a moving car—especially not one you’re driving—but you’ll want to get to a vet as soon as possible, even if you manage to get your dog to cough up the goods (or, I should say, the bads).

For the most part, no—at least not in the usual sense of transmitting diseases.
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Although pups and people suffer from some similar ailments, germs and viruses tend to be species specific. True, bugs and parasites that are dangerous to humans can pass unmolested through canine intestines—but that’s only a problem if you pick up dog poop with your bare hands or don’t wash up after playing with your dog in the dirt where he’s pooped in the past. Somewhat less disgusting but no less lacking in common sense would be removing a disease-bearing tick from your dog without safely disposing of it, thus allowing the little bloodsucker to get under your skin.

And, yes, you can get rabies if your rabid dog bites you, but if you own a vicious dog that hasn’t been vaccinated, I somehow doubt you’re reading this book.

Dog owners are, however, subject to a group of less widely reported and thus more insidious Canine-Related Injuries (CRIs). According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), an average of 76,500 people per year trip over their dogs. Most incidents occur during walks, when 31.3 percent reported that they “fell or tripped over the dog” and another 21.2 percent admitted they were “pushed or pulled by the dog.” These statistics, based on data from emergency room visits, likely represent only a fraction of actual CRIs because, according to the CDC, “many people don’t seek treatment after injuring themselves in accidents involving their pets.”

Or they seek treatment outside of emergency rooms. A physical therapist friend told me that she has seen multiple cases of dislocated shoulders caused by sudden and vigorous tugging on the leash. A less typical CRI, but one with which I have personal experience, is tendonitis of the wrist that can result from letting a small dog rest his head on your hand while you’re typing.

Most CRIs can be prevented by training—both of you and your dog. Work on ways to get your dog to stop tugging at the leash and to remind yourself to watch for underfoot pups.

More difficult is to train yourself to use common sense—say, when it comes to refusing your pup his chosen headrest.

But the health benefits that dogs confer far outweigh any potential problems. Studies have shown that dogs—and, okay, other warm-blooded pets that shall remain nameless—lower blood pressure and cholesterol; stave off depression; and hasten recovery from major surgery. And that’s just for starters. So go kiss your dog, and let her kiss you back. Just don’t lick your own face directly afterwards.

Not as much—and not as often—as he’d like you to. Dogs have the stockpile-for-starvation gene, which dictates, “Eat! You never know when you’ll see your next meal.”
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So unless you have a very evolved pup, he’s not going to stop chowing down just because he’s no longer hungry. The amount your dog actually needs—as opposed to what he’ll eat—depends on his metabolism, age, and activity level, as well as on the type of food involved.

I once used a dog sitter who didn’t grasp this concept. She called me in a panic on the fourth morning of a trip because Frankie was throwing up copiously on every visible surface (but particularly on those that are tough to clean, like the couch and rugs). It turned out that she had ignored my written instructions and served Frankie vast bowls of food, which he happily consumed—until his 11-pound body rebelled. Running mini-marathons might have compensated for his gluttony, but Frankie takes his house-guarding duties very seriously while I’m gone, refusing to venture beyond the backyard. Home protection doesn’t burn very many calories.

The dog sitter’s defense—that she only fed Frankie the specified two times a day—brings me to the question of frequency. Because of their feast-and-famine pasts, dogs are designed to go without food for long periods. How long a period between feedings you want to enforce will depend on convenience—and guilt. If you’re around your dog all day, he will try his best to wheedle food out of you. Twice-daily feedings give you less reason to project, “He must be hungry;
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would be.” If you’re away for a large part of the day—or aren’t swayed by pleading looks—then feeding once a day is generally fine. Although dogs don’t have a preference, most people, and especially those who leave home for work, prefer morning feedings, on the premise that a satisfied dog won’t feel the need to chew on shoes or furniture (in Chapter 7, I also discuss keeping your dog occupied by putting part of his morning meal in a puzzle toy). And morning feedings eliminate the fear that your dog is only happy to see you when you get home because you’re a meal ticket.

For large, deep-chested breeds that are prone to bloat—a life-threatening condition that requires surgery, not just a little gas—feeding smaller portions twice or even three times a day is a better plan. Some people even advocate free-feeding for these breeds, i.e., leaving food around all day so they won’t inhale their food at mealtimes. Free-feeding is not recommended in general, however, not only because it’s an invitation for most dogs to overeat, but also because constant access to food can make pups finicky.