Amaryllis (Suitors of Seattle) (4 page)

As soon as she arched up to him, he took it as permission to begin moving inside her, stroking deep.  Within moments she was moaning beneath him, and he was moving with quick even strokes, driving them both toward completion.

Amaryllis stared up into Alex’s eyes, knowing that she would never allow another man to do this to her.  Alex was the only man who could ever make her feel this way, and she was happy to be in his arms. 

She could feel something building deep inside her, and wanted Alex to help her find it, whatever it was.  She moved with his thrusts, clenching him to her.  Finally, she broke apart, and her body seemed to explode.  She let out a little moan of pleasure, and held to him as he moved into her a few more times before collapsing atop her. 

She lay under him, stroking his hair, now damp with sweat away from his face, thinking about how badly he needed a haircut.  His face was buried in her neck, and she loved the feel of his weight on her body. 

After a moment, he rolled to her side, pulling her into his arms and cradling her head on his shoulder.  He stroked his hand up and down her back slowly, until they both fell asleep.  Her last thought was that she was glad to know this happiness, even if it was the only time she would ever experience it.

Chapter Three

Amaryllis woke, startled at the feel of an arm wrapped tightly around her waist.  She slept alone, and had since Lily had moved from the house and left an empty bedroom.  It was one of the perks of being the oldest daughter still living at home.  But who was touching her?

She rolled to see Alex’s profile in the evening light drifting through the curtained window.  She reached out and stroked his cheek, unable to help herself, before she got to her feet and quickly dressed, her cheeks a bright red.  How could she have done this with him?

She watche
d him carefully, dressing as quietly as she could in the fading sunlight creeping into the dark room.  He stirred and turned to her.  She had pulled on her petticoat, but nothing more.  She stood staring at him, wishing he would drift back to sleep. 

“Where you going?” he asked, his voice heavy with sleep.  He held a hand out to her.  “Come back here and let me hold you.”
  His hair was mussed, and he looked more handsome to her than he ever had before.  The sheet was pulled over his waist, but just barely, and she loved how the hair narrowed to a triangle as it disappeared under the sheet.

She shook her head frantically.  “I have to get home.  My family will be worried about me.”  She rushed to
his office and picked up her wrinkled dress from the floor pulling it over her head. 

He followed her into the office moving silently.  She was shocked to see him when she turned and jumped, her hand going to her chest in surprise.  He was totally nude, and she made her eyes stay on his shoulders.  She couldn’t force herself to meet his eyes.  “You’ll marry me now, Rilly.”  He pulled her against him.

She pushed away from him.  “No, Alex.  I can’t.”  She started to open the door, but he caught her arm. 

“You have to.  You could be carrying my baby.”
 

She hadn’t thought of that, and turned back to him in surprise.  “If that happens, we’ll talk about it then.”  She turned to leave, taking the doorknob again.

“Rilly, I don’t care if you’re pregnant or not.  I want to marry you. I want you in my life forever.”  His voice was low, but insistent. 

She shook her head.  “I can’t marry a man I don’t trust.  I’m sorry.”  She tried the knob, but realized he’d locked it.  “Give me the key.”

He stared down at her, his eyes grim.  “I’ll make you a deal.  If you kiss me one last time, and still want to go, I’ll give you the key.” 

She stared up into his eyes and flushed.  She shook her head.  “Please just give me the key, Alex.”
  She didn’t want to kiss him again and end up back in a storm of emotions.

He reached down to his suit jacket on the floor and pulled the key from the pocket, clenching it tightly in his fist.  “One kiss, Rilly.”  He knew it was a last ditch effort to get her to see that she loved him, and he knew that even if she left, he
could go talk to her father, and the marriage would happen against her will, but he didn’t want that to have to happen.  He loved her.  How could he force her to marry him?

She sighed heavily and moved closer to him.  Keeping her lips pressed tightly together, she pressed her lips against his. 

He moved a hand beneath her hair, which was wild, hanging half off over her shoulders and half still in the tight bun from the morning, and held her to him.  He deepened the kiss and felt her sagging against him.  Even she couldn’t deny the passion that was there.

When their lips finally parted, she pulled away from him and held her hand out for the key.  He dropped it into her hand before turning to put clothes on.  He’d
have to figure out what to do.  What choice had she left him?  He couldn’t let her go.

*****

Amaryllis walked slowly through the quiet streets.  It wasn’t raining for once, and she was thrilled.  She didn’t pay attention to where she was walking, but she found herself in front of her oldest sister Rose’s house before too much time had passed.  She sighed as she knocked on the door.  Hopefully she would catch Rose before Shawn got home, and they could talk about how she was feeling.  She desperately needed her sister’s advice.

Rose opened the door herself and after taking a long look at Amaryllis she opened the door wide.  Rose said nothing as she led her sister down the hall and into the small parlor she used for entertaining her friends.  “You’d better tell me what happened, Amaryllis, because you look like you’ve been with a man.”

Amaryllis sank down onto the small sofa and let her tears fall.  “I was with Alex.”  She knew her sister would interpret her words the correct way, and know just what she’d done.

Rose didn’t say anything, but she looked relieved.  “You’ll have to marry him now.”

Amaryllis shook her head as she watched her sister.  “I can’t marry someone I don’t trust.”  How could she make people understand that?  She couldn’t trust Alex not to run to another woman when she was pregnant or had small children to feed.

“What if you’re expecting
?  You can’t raise a baby without a father.”

Amaryllis shrugs.  “If I’m expecting, then I’ll marry him.  I pray that’s not the case.  No child should have to be raised in a household where his parents don’t trust each other.”

Rose sighed.  “Why don’t you trust him?”

“Sarah?”
  She said the name in a sarcastic tone of voice like she would have used when she was ten.  There was something about being with her siblings that brought out the child in her.

“I don’t think Sarah
is anyone to worry about.  He came back to you.”  Rose looked like she was hiding something, but Amaryllis wasn’t willing to press her on it.  She wanted her sister firmly on her side, and it didn’t feel like that was going to happen.

Amaryllis sighed.  “I should have known you’d take his side.”

Rose shook her head, her blond hair bouncing.  “It’s not that I’m taking his side.  I just want you to be happy.” 

“Then you understand why I can’t possibly marry Alex.”

“No, I really don’t.  I think that the two of you belong together.  You used to say you and Alex were soul mates.”

Amaryllis shook her head, confused.  “Well we are…or were.  I don’t know anymore!  I want to forget about him, but I just can’t.  He kisses me
, and my knees go week.  Is that wrong of me?”

Rose shook her head leaning forward to take Amaryllis’s hand in hers.  “No, it’s not wrong, as long as you’re married to him.  You need to give him another chance and marry him.  You can’t risk Mama and Papa’s reputation with an out of wedlock baby.”

Amaryllis shook her head adamantly.  “But I don’t trust him!”  How many times did she have to say that before someone understood her?

Rose shrugged.  “I trusted Shawn with everything inside me when I married him, but I shouldn’t have.  I can now, of course.  I think Alex is a lot more trustworthy than Shawn was.  Marry him.”

Amaryllis sighed.  “I thought you of all people would be on my side, Rose.”

“I am on your side.  I want you to be happy, and I can’t see you happy with anyone but Alex.”  Rose paused for a moment as if she
were thinking.  “I know you’ve been seeing someone else.  Does he make you feel like Alex does?”

Amaryllis shrugged.  “Well, no.  He kissed me, and it was boring.”
  She hated admitting that she preferred Alex’s kisses as she was trying to get her sister’s agreement that she shouldn’t marry him, but she wasn’t about to lie to her either.

“And when Alex kisses you?”

Amaryllis blushed.  “I can’t seem to control how I feel about Alex.  He kisses me once and I want to rip his clothes off so I can touch his skin.”  She looked down at her hands after admitting that shameful fact.

Rose laughed softly.  “You need to marry Alex.  You need to marry Alex yesterday.”

Amaryllis stood.  “I’ll think about it.”

Rose looked at her sister.  “You need to fix your hair before you leave, Rilly.  It’s obviously been mussed.”

Amaryllis walked over to the mirror on the wall and peered into it.  Rose was right.  Her hair was falling down around her shoulders.  She quickly fixed it back into the tight bun she wore and headed for the door.  “Thanks for talking to me.”

Rose nodded, hugging her sister quickly.  “I’m here for you.”

Amaryllis walked toward home, knowing it was late enough that her parents would be worried.  She rushed through the streets, hoping they wouldn’t ask where she’d been.  She could honestly answer that she’d gone to her sister’s house, but she didn’t want to start telling half-truths to her parents. 

*****

Alex knocked on the door of the battered women’s home where his mother and step-father worked and lived.  When the door was opened by his mother, Mildred, he stepped inside, hugging her close.  He had been in a hurry to see Amaryllis, and hadn’t stopped to see his mother or step-father in the time he’d been back in town. 

“Is John here
?” he asked, knowing his mother wouldn’t be pleased he wanted to see his step-father but not her.

M
ildred made a face.  “John?  No ‘I missed you, Mama?’”

Alex grinned.  “I missed you, Mama.  I really need to talk to John, though.  I need some advice.  About women.”

“Well, of course, I couldn’t help with that not being a woman or anything.”  He could hear the sarcasm dripping from her voice.

Alex closed his eyes.  “Please, Mama?”

Mildred shook her head at him.  “I’ll go get him.  Wait in the office.”

John Higgins, Alex’s step-father, kept an office in the battered women’s shelter where he lived with his wife.  Alex had lived there with them before he’d gone off to college.  Alex went into the office and took a seat at the chair in front of the desk where he knew John would sit.  He just hoped the older man would listen to his troubles and give him advice without censuring him.  He knew he’d been wrong to rush Amaryllis into intimacy, but he’d been sure that if they’d had relations, she would see that she needed to marry him.

John came into the room and closed the door behind him before pulling Alex to his feet and into a tight hug.  “We missed you while you were away, son.”

Alex clung to the man who had been more of a father to him than his own father.  John had witnessed him accidentally kill his father when
his father had hit his mother.  He’d helped him through it and had talked to the police for him, instead of forcing him to stand alone.  Then the following day, John had asked Mildred to marry him and had acted as if Alex was the son he’d always wanted.  There had been no bad feelings between them as he’d heard there often was between a man and his step-children.

John walked around the desk and took the chair behind it.  “Your mom said you wanted to talk about women
, and she wasn’t qualified?”

Alex sighed.  “I hope I didn’t hurt Mama’s feelings, but I needed to talk to you, not her.”  He looked down at his hands.  “You know that Amaryllis told me she was no longer interested in being my sweetheart
two years ago.  Somehow I still had in the back of my mind that we’d end up married.  I just needed to finish school; and I’d come home with flowers, and she’d fall into my arms.”  He laughed at himself.  “It’s not quite working out that way.”

John frowned.  “I didn’t realize you were even still interested in marrying Amaryllis.”

“I’ve thought of her every day.  I dream of her every night.”  He leaned back in the chair.  “I got back in town, rented a small office with an apartment attached so I’d have a place to live, and went to see her.  She was out with another man.”  He shook his head.  “That should have been my first clue.”

“I hadn’t heard she was seeing anyone.”

Alex shrugged.  He knew his step-father would have been asked to investigate if Amaryllis was anywhere close to marriage.  “Honestly, I don’t think it’s serious.”  He stared at his step-father, trying to get the courage up to admit what he’d done.  “I went to see her at the library, and she said she didn’t want to have anything to do with me ever again.  I left, but only to make a plan.  I’ve gone to see her several times since I’ve been home.”

John nodded.  “That doesn’t surprise me.  You wouldn’t give up on her if you still had your mind set on marrying her.”

“I grabbed her and pulled her into my office when she was on her way home today.  I knew she walked right in front of it, but she didn’t even know it was mine, so I waited under the awning where she wouldn’t be able to see me, and grabbed her arm and pulled her inside.”  His eyes met John’s evenly.  “I locked the door so she couldn’t get out.”

John’s eyes widened.  “You didn’t hurt her did you?”

“Of course not!  I kissed her.  I had in my head that if I could just show her how much feeling there was between us, she’d fall into my arms and tell me she’d be pleased to be my wife.”

John smiled.  “Didn’t work out that way, did it?”

Alex shook his head.  “No.  Even after we made love, she’s still determined that she won’t marry me.”

“Made love?”  John frowned.  “Before you were married?”

Alex hung his head as he nodded.  “Yes, before marriage.  I didn’t really expect it to go that far, but I have to admit, I hoped it would.”  He pushed a stray lock of hair off his forehead.  “We both fell asleep, but when we woke, I asked her if she’d marry me.  She got dressed and left.  Nothing I said swayed her at all.”