An Aria in Venice: A Musical Interlude Novel (25 page)

Nikolai

Several
well-known dancers, and a couple of superstar ballerinas, show up to the last
minute celebration here at my house. If I cannot wish away my thoughts of the
woman who has haunted me ever since she disappeared a week ago, then I can at
least have someone else fuck the stupidity out of me.

This
makes the first swingers gig I have thrown in well over a month, and it will
not be my last. After receiving Adriana’s text, the one where she informed me
she would be staying in Venice for another few days, I had to do something to
remind me of why I literally handed the one thing that could’ve made me into
the person I wanted to be over to another man.

I
live the life of a man who has two personalities. One being the superstar
dancer who has risen from the ashes of prostitution and sexual abuse, a man who
sees the jaded things in this world through my eyes, and also those of the
people around me, the ones I care about most. Although, I am not so sure
Adriana would agree with me right now. The other side of me, the bad boy hiding
inside a pretty package, craves power, to have the world at my fingertips.

Meiko
runs her hand over my cock, but I am lost in visions of Adriana running through
a field of purple flowers I cannot identify, her waist-length, dark hair
flowing behind her, a whisper of darkness against a golden veil of sunlight
covering the area around her.

I
know it is the alcohol. I do not care that Meiko has unzipped my pants and now
holds my cock in her hand, stroking it, massaging me in a combination of short
and long strokes, the warmth of her mouth covering my tip. The physical part of
sex does not matter if the mind makes the experience something altogether
different, transporting you to that mystical place that so many have died and
killed for in the quest to understand that connection between man and woman.

When
my body begins to shudder, I am holding onto my phantom lover, my cock buried
deep inside her sex. Rishka, the girl who has taken my heart and mind, twisting
them both into a ball of cotton candy that she could choose to devour at any
time.

Shortly
after recovering from my misguided fantasy, I thank my masseuse for being so
diligent in her job’s duties, walk back downstairs, and find my comrade, Sasha,
standing inside the living room. He is composed as far as clothing goes, but
the expression on his face tells me something grim has happened.

“Aleksandr,”
I say, walking toward him. “I did not expect to see you here tonight.”

“Can’t
stay long, Kolya,” he answers, following me into the den, away from the party’s
camaraderie. A small bar awaits our arrival.

“Maybe
you can tell me why my sister decided she needed a weeklong trip to Venice,” he
asks. I fill two glasses with vodka and hand one to Alek. “I don’t appreciate
when she acts rebellious this way. Makes it hard to watch over her.”

I
take a long sip of my drink. “She did not tell you?” Of course I know she did
not; especially after she begged me to keep her secret.

“I
know she’s with the designer.”

“A
toast for my friend who is now inside the loop along with me,” I say. He tucks
a hand in his pocket and stares at me. I hate it when he does that. That look
means he is trying to figure someone out; and lately, my life has become like a
fresh wound gaping open for the world to see.

“You
love my sister,” Alek states, his sharp eyes searching my face. Lying is
useless at this point. He is a man who knows how to see through a person’s
deception. I go with a half-truth instead. “Of course I love Adriana. She is
like my sister, too.”

“That’s
not what I meant.”

“Well,
it is exactly what I meant. Now drop this conversation,” I growl with more
irritation in my voice than I meant to use.

“All
right. A new discussion then. I heard that the Burkenstein Group might be
investing in your company. Congratulations.”

“Thank
you. I think.”

He
hesitates and shuffles his left foot. Something’s on his mind. “Will you tell
Mother you’ll be leaving her company?”

“I
have not gone anywhere yet.”

“Burkenstein
isn’t known for inheriting clients with dual loyalties. Regardless, you’d be a
fool not to snatch up this opportunity,” he says, surprising me. We had always
agreed we would conquer the music world together. This confirmation of his
loyalty only serves to show me how much my comrade has changed over the past
few months.

“Are
you ill and forgot to tell me about it?” I ask, unable to hold back a smile.

“No.
I might be something else that’s somewhat insane, but definitely not sick.” He
is smiling to himself, thinking of the designer girl, I am sure. My friend has
fallen in love. A stab of envy hits me, but I shake it off at once.

“Know
that I am happy for you.” I slap him on the back, turn back to the bar, and
offer him another shot of vodka. “If you will not have a woman tonight, then
you should at least allow a shot of alcohol to warm your loins for the time
being.” I get a big, bright Alek grin.

“To
our futures.” He raises his glass and downs the shot without flinching. I do
the same. “You have my support, Nikolai. In both financial and other familial
matters.”

I
do not miss the hint, and I am grateful for his blessing. I only hope it has
not come too late.

Rehearsal
has been grueling. That is an understatement. It has been hell. I am relieved
to know the show happens in only a few weeks.

The
inside of the Teatro beams brighter today than yesterday. The owners finally
got around to installing a new lighting system. The sight of the red and gold
interior fills me with excitement, an allusion to the grandeur of the show Alek
and I have been working toward over the past eight months.

The
members of my ballet troupe have perfected the moves to our routine, working
hard and putting in an inhumanly large amount of hours over the past few weeks.
The Burkenstein Group called this morning to tell me that my proposal for
financial backing has been accepted. Also, my comrade, the person whose opinion
of me I greatly respect, has approved my obsession with his sister. The world
could not have offered me a better morning to wake up and experience than this
one.

 And
then I see her.

Rishka
stands at the door leading to the hallways behind the stage like a phantom
snatched straight out of my dream. Jealousy slaughters my good sense and kills
my mood. She returned a little over a week ago, but this makes the first time
I’ve seen her since before she left.

“All
right. Everyone take five,” I say to my troupe. I head straight toward Adriana,
pull her into my arms, and kiss her. Long and hard. She pulls away, which
doesn’t surprise me, especially after the things I said to her before she left.

“Is
something wrong? You have never had an issue with me kissing you before,” I
remind.

“It’s
great to see you, too, Nikolai. And for the record, you never made it a point
to kiss me on the mouth.” Easing out of my arms, she walks around me and heads toward
the dancers, avoiding my question.

Turning
back to me, she says, “They look fantastic. So professional.”

“Uh-huh.
That they do. Because they have me to instruct them.” I get a nervous smile,
and she is fidgeting ... distant in the way her gaze rakes over me and in how
she will not stare directly into my eyes. I cannot take this wondering; I want
to know if what I am thinking has happened is real.

“You
slept with him,” I state, keeping my gaze focused on the way she will not look
at me. Instead, she glances up toward the ceiling and crosses her arms. I step
in front of her. “Answer my question.” My voice sounds desperate, but I do not
care.

“Yes!”
she hisses, snapping a hard gaze to my face. The confirmation floors me, and I
struggle to keep from hitting something. Anything to help ease the sharp pain
I’m feeling, something to stop me from going out and strangling Katerina’s
designer.

“You
barely know him,” I almost shout.

“I
know him well enough. Besides, how can you criticize me when you and Alek sleep
with whoever, and whatever, at those orgy things?” Damn, she has a point.
However, I cannot let this go. I am raging inside right now.

“That
is not the same thing. Alek and I know what we are doing! This bastard has
taken advantage of you. It is what he does.” I am so angry I can barely see
straight. I feel the animal boiling inside me, the man I told myself I would
never allow the privilege of ruling my thoughts or my body ever again
scrambling to find a way out of me.

“It’s
complicated. You can’t understand.” She cares for this man. Deeply.

What
have I done?

“All
that player wants is sex and your money. Do not fool yourself into believing
this charade is about anything else.”

She
snaps a teary-eyed gaze up to my face. “You’re bitter. You’ll turn into a mean
old man one day, if you can’t stop hating on everything good in this world,
Nikolai.” I flinch. Time to back off, Belikov. I never take my own advice.

“And
you will become nothing more than a poor man’s whore, if you continue with
this,” I growl. The sting from her slap stuns me, but it is the fire in her
gaze that tells me I have pushed this too far, the way I always do with the
people I love the most. I do not say a word as I massage my face.

“You
don’t want me, but you don’t want anyone else to have me either? You choose to
insult me, instead. That’s some typical big, ego-headed bullshit!” she says,
firmly, shocking the shit out of me by using a mouth she must have stolen from
her brother without either one of us knowing it.

“I
do want you.” I grab her shoulders. “I have never wanted anyone more. I do
crazy shit to forget you. You have no idea what this conversation is doing to
me right now.”

“You
sent me away,” she whispers, her resolve slowly breaking. I get a hint of the
woman who, up until a little over a week ago, worshipped me like a god. “Don’t
you remember telling me nothing could ever happen between us?”

Do
I ever remember? “That was the idiot in me.”

“Now
you can just deal with the results of your words,” she snaps, her voice
shaking, her gaze angry.

“Listen
to yourself. You are not even normal right now.” It is the only thing I know to
say.

“No,
why don’t we listen to what the Great Nikolai has to say, instead. Since he’s
such an expert on how to handle someone’s feelings,” she scoffs, snatching her
arms away and turning to leave. I cannot let her go this way, but my pride
still has a firm hold on me. Turning back to me, she says, “JoJo’s band is
performing at the Alcatraz. I don’t want to be late. I just thought I’d stop by
and say hello.”

I
take a step back, meeting her gaze. Holding up my hands, I say, “
Sdavaisya.
”

“You
can’t surrender to an enemy that you killed before the war even started,
Nikolai.”

“You
are not my enemy. You will always be my Rishka.”