Angels in Pink: Holly's Story (Lurlene McDaniel (Mass Market)) (13 page)

epilogue

THAT NIGHT, HOLLY couldn’t sleep. The house was quiet, the parties over, the celebrations completed. She’d had a good time. She was a high school graduate, ready for the next phase of her life. And yet . . .
and yet
. . . She missed her brother. Hunter should have been there. He would have teased her, hugged her, ruffled her hair and, yes, prayed for her too.

Holly got up, turned on her desk lamp, reached into her drawer and pulled out her old diary. She hadn’t written in it in ages, not since the previous summer. The blank pages stared up at her like black holes she couldn’t fill because there was too much to write, or to remember. Still, she could start fresh. She considered where to begin—with the last days of school? The graduation ceremony? The party?
No,
she decided, as her heart spoke to her. She found a pen and began to write.

Dear Hunter,

All right, so I know you’ll never read
this, but I’m writing it anyway because
it’s not really for
your
sake, it’s for mine. I
never got to say goodbye. I just had to accept
the fact that you were gone and never
coming back. That’s been hard. Even now,
months later, I still expect to bang on the
bathroom door and tell you to vacate
because it’s my turn. I expect to see you at
the dinner table. I expect to grab the remote
from you, make popcorn for us, cry on your
shoulder when Dad and I disagree (which is
happening less these days . . . aren’t you
proud of me?).

I never got to tell you a lot of things I
meant to tell you but now can’t. Maybe
writing to you this way will help me face the
rest of my life without my brother.

You were (I hate that I must write in the
past tense) a pretty good brother . . . okay,
a
very
good brother. I know I never told you
that when I could, so I’m saying it now. You
were always there for me, and I miss you a
lot. I want to ask you for your take on
things—like Chad, for instance. He says he
loves me, Hunter. I like him. I really do.
But love? I’m not ready for that. I tell him
so, but it’s like he doesn’t hear me.

You loved Raina. And even though
you and she were worlds apart on some
things, you knew you loved her. I want to
ask you,
How did you know?
Mom tries to
give me advice, but it sounds corny. “Don’t
worry, you’ll know.” What kind of an
answer is that? (Sorry, didn’t mean to get
sidetracked.)

There’s just so much I want to talk to
you about and tell you. Raina has had so
much to deal with and has had a really hard
time facing the world without you. There
were days when I didn’t think she would pull
out of the black cloud that covered her. Yet
she has. Sort of. You’re a hard act to follow,
H. I think it’s going to be a long, long time
before she falls in love again.

Mom had a rough time too. For a while
I thought she would break apart. She was
really mad at God. So was I. We’re mostly
over the being mad part, but Pastor Eckloes
says that it might come up again, especially
when the man who murdered you goes on
trial. I know we’re supposed to forgive him,
but how? I’m not there yet.

Dad’s managed best, but sometimes I
see him with a faraway look on his face and
I know he’s thinking about you. Sometimes I
see tears in his eyes. Then I have to look
away because I can’t stand seeing Dad cry.
Everyone misses you. Sometimes your old
friends stop by the house just to visit. I didn’t
like it at first, but now it’s easier to talk
about you and hear their stories about you.
(Did you
really
do a home video in Jeff
Johnson’s garage in the eighth grade of an air
boy band?) And Kevin brought over a video
of a Bible talk you gave at camp one
summer. That one almost unraveled Mom
and Dad, but not me. I needed to hear you
say those things about love and faith.

Well, Hunter, it’s getting late and I’m
finally winding down and getting sleepy. I
promised Kathleen and Raina we’d have a
day at Raina’s pool tomorrow, just like old
times. Raina’s moving in six weeks to live
with Emma, a good thing, I think, now that
I’m used to the idea. She would have moved
sooner but we’ve promised Sierra that we’d
be Pink Angels again this summer and help
her with the carnival set for July Fourth
weekend. It’s going to take a ton of hard
work, but it was my idea, and my two best
friends are willing to help me. (What are
friends for?)

In truth, this won’t be the last letter I
write to you. I know this because just doing
it has made me feel a whole lot better tonight
already. So until next time, this is your
favorite
only
sister signing off, still missing
you, but feeling like you’re a whole lot closer
than the mansions of heaven. Please ask the
angels to watch over us.

Holly

ALSO AVAILABLE FROM LAUREL-LEAF BOOKS

A SUMMER TO DIE,
Lois Lowry
WHIRLIGIG,
Paul Fleischman
SKELLIG,
David Almond
JUST AS LONG AS WE’RE TOGETHER,
Judy Blume
HERE’S TO YOU, RACHEL ROBINSON, Judy Blume
DRIVER’S ED, Caroline B. Cooney
LIFE IN THE FAT LANE,
Cherie Bennett

About the Author

Lurlene McDaniel began writing inspirational novels about teenagers facing life-altering situations when her son was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes. “I want kids to know that while people don’t get to choose what life gives to them, they do get to choose how they respond.”

Her many novels, which have received acclaim from readers, teachers, parents and reviewers, are hard-hitting and realistic but also leave readers with inspiration and hope.

Lurlene McDaniel lives in Chattanooga, Tennessee.

You’ll want to read these inspiring books by Lurlene McDaniel

Angels in Pink
Kathleen’s Story
Raina’s Story
Holly’s Story

One Last Wish Novels
Mourning Song
A Time to Die
Mother, Help Me Live
Someone Dies, Someone Lives
Sixteen and Dying
Let Him Live
The Legacy: Making Wishes Come True
Please Don’t Die
She Died Too Young
All the Days of Her Life
A Season for Goodbye
Reach for Tomorrow

Other Fiction
Briana’s Gift
Letting Go of Lisa
The Time Capsule
Garden of Angels
A Rose for Melinda
Telling Christina Goodbye
How Do I Love Thee: Three Stories
To Live Again
Angel of Mercy • Angel of Hope
Starry, Starry Night: Three Holiday Stories
The Girl Death Left Behind
Angels Watching Over Me
Lifted Up by Angels
Until Angels Close My Eyes
I’ll Be Seeing You
Saving Jessica
Don’t Die, My Love
Too Young to Die
Goodbye Doesn’t Mean Forever
Somewhere Between Life and Death
Time to Let Go
Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep
When Happily Ever After Ends
Baby Alicia Is Dying

From every ending comes a new beginning. . . .