Armed and Fabulous (Lexi Graves Mysteries) (27 page)

A
s we p
roceeded
, I turned and saw a woman bent over a chair, which wouldn't have been interesting at all, if not for the Victorian-costumed woman spanking her enthusiastically
with a
ping-pong
paddle
.

I stumbled and Maddox caught me, yanking me past the
line
of the onlookers. "Make mine a double," I said.

"I think a man just groped me," said Maddox
, worried lines furrowing his forehead
.

"Everyone just groped me," I muttered. Somewhere, not far away, I imagined Solomon smiling.

The bar was several people deep. When I felt a hand on my arm, I jumped, expecting another groper, but instead
found
Lily.
"Your table is ready," she said
, her Geisha lips pursed. She
cracked a whip. I blinked.
Where had my friend gone?

"Our what?"
I wheezed as she
re
coiled the whip.

"Your
reservation
is ready," she
repeated
slowly
,
flashing wide
‘get with it’
eyes before
beckoning us to follow her to a small booth. As we
sat down
, I realized I could see across the small dance floor to the corridors that sprang off
at
the far end
:
the bar and the "entertainment" areas.
We had an excellent view of the club. I sent Lily a mental pat on the head.
"Your waitress will take your drinks order shortly." And with that
,
Lily was gone. I noticed no one dared grope her and the one hand that did get to
o
close got a sharp
sting
from
her
whip
.

"Can you imagine you
-
know
-
who in here?" I said to Maddox as he
edged closer to me
, his forearms resting on the table.
H
e clasped his
hands together.
I felt grateful that he blocked me mostly from view
ing the club
, even if I w
ere
tempted to peek
.
Montgomery was a lot more exciting than I gave it credit for
,
I decided
,
when
a man in a rubber mask and hotpants stalked past.
"I wonder what
Dean
wore."

"I'm trying not to think about it."

"Do you think he was a rubber man or chaps?"

"
Jeez
."

"PVC must get pretty hot in here." I mimed peeling it off, my tongue making a wet
,
popping sound.

"Sounds like you know what you're talking about."

"Me?
” I shook my head. “
Heavens
,
no."

"Maybe he wore a rubber thong like that guy." Maddox nodded and I
shuddered
the moment my eyes hit on the ski
nny man in, yes, a rubber thong, incongruously paired with
a pair of dress shoes and
black
socks.

"I didn't need to see that."

“No one does.”

A woman in a black tutu with a frilly apron and an impossibly small-waisted bustier
, which
she
was nearly
popp
ing
out of
suddenly
blocked out our view. "I'm Ruby. Can I take your order?"
she asked, before blowing a very large bubble of pink gum
,
which
deflated after a loud pop
. She sucked it in
and gave us an expectant look.

I pulled the photo of Martin Dean out of my little bag and placed it flat on the table. "Actually. Maybe you can help me. Do you know this man?" I asked.
Okay, it wasn’t subtle but I bet my tiny dress that if anyone would recognize our man, it would be the waitress.

Ruby
studied it for a moment.
Her jaw stiffened and she glanced at me
,
then somewhere across the room, and back again.
"I'm not sure," she said finally
, looking from Maddox
and back to me
with suspicion
. "What'll it be?"

Instead of a flash of uncertainty, I thought she sounded pretty definite. I rooted in my bag, pulled out a
folded
twenty and slid it next to the picture. "How about now?"

Ruby
palmed the money in a smooth movement and it disappeared. "Yeah, he's a regular. I don't see him tonight and he's usually here by now. What did he do to you? Get a bit too frisky in the dungeon?
Boyfriend gonna spank him back?
"

"Uh,
no
.
” The idea of Maddox spanking anyone had not crossed my
mind until th
at
very moment
. But now…
I thought
about Solomon snorting as he listened.
This was a bad idea. Now, he would really think I was stupid. I took a deep breath and persisted,
“
Actually, I'm more interested in the woman he came with. What can you tell me about her?" Also: what was Dean into? And what was the dungeon? I
had
to ask Lily.
Frankly, I h
ad so much to ask her
,
I
should
make a list.

Ruby
glanced up, quickly looking around the room
,
then pulled out her pen and pad. "Yo
u gotta order drinks," she said, her voice rising above the thump-thump of the track playing.

"Are we being watched?" asked
Maddox
.

She smiled brightly like we'd just complimented her.
Definitely the right question.
"You betcha.
My boss likes to make money not small talk.
"

"Okay. Let's discuss the cocktail list..." I picked the menu off the table, adding, "and the woman."

"She's about my height. Red hair in a bob, though I think it's a wig.
A lot y
ounger than him,
"
Ruby said, tapping her pen on the cocktail menu as though giving advice.

"Is she here tonight?"

"Yeah. I saw her ten minutes ago."

"Where?"
I asked.

"She was at the bar. There was another guy with her
. N
ot that dude
.
” She nodded at the photo. “
She’s with a s
hort guy."

"What did he look like?"

"Kinda average. White guy. Thirties
,
maybe. I wasn't really looking. You don't here, ya know. Unless, you...
ya know
."

I got her p
oint. I didn't want to
“
ya know
.”
I darted a look at Maddox.
Not in public anyway.
"Where'd they go?"
I asked.

"I dunno." She tapped her pen on the pad
impatiently
. "C'mon guys, you gotta order or I'll get in trouble."

"Martini," I said, placing
the
menu
I held on the table, right
over the p
hoto
,
which I palmed
just as smoothly
.

"And a beer," added Maddox.

She jotted our order down. "Coming right up," she said, turning on her heel and sashaying away, her hips wiggling like nobody's business.

"We need to find this woman," said Maddox.

"And the guy," I said. "You think he's here for the spanky
-
panky
?
O
r
is
he part of the gang?"

"
I’m not sure I want to guess
." All the while Maddox talked, his head was
facing
me
,
but I could see his eyes roaming the room.
"I don't see her,
"
he told me.
He
relaxed
, resting his back against the padded
upholstery of the booth.

Ruby,
the waitress
, returned,
cut
ting
off his view and
we
waited while she lay down cocktail napkins and our drinks. As she slid my martini in front of me, she whispered, "I just saw the woman go down the hall towards the ladies
’
room. The guy was with her. Not the one in the picture, the one she's here with tonight.
I think he’s
new. He had that look about him." She looked pointedly at us. Yeah, okay, so we stuck out.

"Thanks," said Maddox as he
slipped her enough money to cover the drinks and a tip. At this rate, the waitress was going to be our best friend the whole night. Not that I planned on staying that long.

"The sooner we find this woman and find out what's going on, the better," I said, after taking a sip of my martini.

"W
hoa
. There's no 'we' here," said Maddox.
“We find this woman. You go home.
We take her in for questioning.
”

I raised my eyebrows. "
No way!
You wouldn't have gotten in here without me. And you're sure as hell not getting into the ladies' bathroom." Hah. Take that, Maddox. I got up,
grabbing
my
purse
, but before I could slide around the other side of the booth
,
Maddox caught me by the wrist.