Arms of Serenity (Rock Services) (11 page)

Chapter Nine

Nick looked down at Becca.
Her face was lit up like a child on Christmas morning. He made a mental note to thank Henry for his picnic in the barn suggestion. Seems fifty years of marriage had taught him a trick or two. He had assured Nick that Becca would love the idea, and he was right.

She looked up at him with her green eyes beaming.
“It’s perfect.”

“I’m glad you like it.”
He took her hand and led her to the blanket. “Go ahead and get comfortable.”

Nick moved around turning on soft music and extra lighting he had hung while he was there in the afternoon.
With the wood construction and bales of hay, candles weren’t an option unless of course he wanted to add torching the barn to the evening’s activities. Instead Eva had given him strings of white lights to help add a touch of romance. He checked the heaters that had been placed around the room to keep out the cold night air and finally turned off the main overhead lights to the barn.

When he came back to the blanket to sit down, the sight waiting for him took his breath away.
The soft lighting shimmered across Becca’s features and surrounded her in almost an unearthly glow. Touches of light danced in her eyes, and her skin looked even fairer against her full raspberry lips. She looked like an angel, and Nick’s chest tightened at the thought of how much he wanted her to be his angel.

His.
What is it about this woman?
How could someone he barely knew have such a hold on him? Sure, there was the physical attraction. Hell, what straight guy wouldn’t want to be with her? But it was the intensity of that attraction that rattled him. Her touch, her scent, her taste only created a need for more. He craved her with a hunger he never experienced before. It was almost primal in nature, the fierce desire to chase, catch, control, and devour.

Then, in complete contradiction, there was the peace she brought him.
One single memory, thought, or whisper of her name stilled the whirlwind that had taken residence in his mind. She anchored him against the raging anger and guilt. With her, he found a focus that he thought had been lost.

Becca was an addictive contradiction of turbulence and tranquility, hunger and
indulgence, lust and harmony. She was an enigma that beckoned to him to be figured out.

Whether it was with a little help from Eva or not, he had gotten his chance and had the night to prove to her that they should pursue whatever this was between them.
Nick didn’t need a flashing neon sign to know something or someone had her holding back. She all but told him that herself with the way she had run away and fought against her own attraction. So when he had planned their date, he wanted to make sure he showed her without a doubt how special she was and that he was there for more than a quick repeat performance of the gazebo. Damned if he knew what “more” actually meant, but for right now he was sure he wasn’t willing to walk away and give up on her.

Nick sat forward and asked, “Hungry?”

“I’m starving. What do you have in there?” Becca inched in to lift the top of the basket and peek inside.

Nick leaned over to move her hand and chuckled.
“I honestly don’t know. I had a little help with our dinner.” He gave her a wink. “Let’s see what our chef left us.”

Nick spread out containers full of fried chicken and fresh fruit, a loaf of French bread
, and a bottle of wine. He laughed when he got to the bottom and found a small wrapped plate of brownies. “Well, this should give the secret away of who did the cooking.”

Becca joined the laughter.
“Leave it to Eva to give me my own dessert.” She reached over opening one of the containers. “I’m going to forgive her though because she made her chicken. This stuff is amazing.” She took a bite and moaned.

Nick leaned back against a bale of hay and crossed his legs.
How could he not just watch and enjoy? He couldn’t take his eyes off those luscious lips. He remembered when it was him that she had taken in her mouth. The feel of her tongue swirling around him had been sweet torture. The thought had him growing within his jeans, and he needed to adjust his position before it became uncomfortable.

Becca opened her lids and cocked her head at him. “What?
Have you tried some yet? Don’t judge until you do.”

He laughed when she waved her drumstick at him.
“I think I can be perfectly content just sitting here watching you eat. Can you moan again? That’s my favorite part.” 

She shrugged
. “Ok by me. You watch, and I’ll eat. But don’t blame me if you have to find a wheelbarrow to get me out of here after I polish off all the chicken myself.”

Nick threw his head back and laughed again.
It felt good to laugh. He couldn’t remember the last time he truly enjoyed himself. Instead of feeling weighted down, he felt lighthearted and free. He shook his head. Maybe she really was an angel.

Sitting forward, he grabbed a piece for himself.
“Oh, no you don’t. The wheelbarrow is reserved for after I get you sloppy drunk and take advantage of you.”

Becca lifted an eyebrow
. “Are you being arrogant or hopeful?”

Nick smiled at her use of the question from the party
and returned with the same answer.. “Both.”

At least he was being honest.
Just because he wanted more than a quick roll in the hay, didn’t mean he wouldn’t take advantage of the bales littering the barn if the opportunity arose.

They continued to eat while talking about their likes and dislikes.
Nick discovered they enjoyed the same types of music, foods and even movies. He was pleasantly surprised that her favorite meal was pizza. He had expected something like lobster or even worse. One girl he’d met actually said she could live on caviar. Who in their right mind would want to live on fish eggs?

She was nothing like the women he was accustomed to meeting.
Hell, the models he had been with didn’t eat. They would just push their food around their plates. Becca was different. She wasn’t afraid to be her own person and didn’t live by the expectations of others. She was a simple down-to-earth woman who enjoyed simple things. He was captivated by her, and the more he learned the more he wanted to know.

Nick refilled their wine and moved to recline on his side.
They had since cleaned up and left just their glasses after dinner. He bent his elbow and rested his head on his hand. “I’m assuming your favorite flower is a white rose considering they were in the bakery and pictured on the logo.”

Becca reclined on her side to face him.
“They were my mother’s favorite. She grew them in our garden and always seemed to have them around the house.” She shrugged. “I guess they became my favorite because of that. They remind me of her.”

“You were close to her.”

Becca nodded and looked down to absently pick at threads of the blanket.
“I miss her. It’s been almost a year since she passed away. She spent years in a wheelchair and was then diagnosed with cancer. Even with all the obstacles she faced, she never stopped seeing the good in life and greeted each day as if it was a gift. She could always get me to laugh, especially the times I seemed to forget how. My mom was the strongest woman I’ve ever known.”

Becca had grown silent
, and Nick wasn’t sure if she would continue or if he wanted her to go on. A weight settled on his chest when he heard the sadness in her voice, and he was struggling with what to say to her when she took a breath and continued.

“In my junior year of college, I had come home for
spring break. My parents wanted to take me somewhere special, and we decided on a show in the city. I always loved musicals, and after seeing one I would sing the tunes all the way home.”

She glanced up.
“Can you imagine a two hour drive with only show tunes being sung from the backseat? You would think they would have turned up the radio or invested in ear plugs. Instead my mom would sing with me while my dad would cheer us on and ask for more.”

Becca moved her head back down to focus on the blanket.
“It was the night of the show, and of course, I wasn’t ready on time. I swear always being late is hardwired into my DNA. We were going to miss the opening, and I suggested we go see the Spring Concert at the university’s satellite campus about an hour from home.”

Nick’s heart ached for Becca.
He knew what had happened next. A part of him felt guilty for not stopping her from reliving that night while another selfish part of him wanted to gather her in his arms and kiss the memories away until only thoughts of him remained.

“My dad had turned at the light that led to the park.
I remember headlights and then everything going black. When I came around, I was in the hospital. My mother had just gotten out of surgery and my father was already gone.”

“Becca, I’m so sorry.
You don’t have to do this.” Nick reached out and placed her hand in his.

“It’s ok.
I want to tell you.” Becca laced her fingers through his and continued. “The kid that hit us was only nineteen and the son of a senator. My mother had been barely awake a few hours when the lawyers pounced on her. The senator wanted the whole thing to be kept as quiet as possible and offered a sizable settlement not to press charges against his son. He didn’t want it to end up in a court room.”

Nick didn’t doubt the senator’s lawyers jumped on her mother as soon as they could.
It was a simple tactic—take advantage of when they’re at the weakest and exploit any vulnerability. The “hit them when they’re down” strategy. In her physical and mental state, they saw their window of opportunity and charged in while she was lying in the hospital bed reeling from the shock. It was an underhanded and total prick move, but from the tone in Becca’s voice he guessed effective.

“The lawyer that was appointed to us wanted us to take the agreement.
He showed us the projected costs of the hospital, surgeries, therapy and rehabilitation. The list went on to include medical equipment and supplies that my mother would need to make her life easier and comfortable. The amount of insurance my parents had wouldn’t even scratch the surface. My mother didn’t think she had much of a choice and took the settlement. He bought her off, and I couldn’t do anything about it. I wanted justice, for him to suffer the same pain that had been inflicted on my family, and all that spoiled rich kid got was a dent in his father’s checkbook and a slap on the wrists.”

Nick flinched at venom in her words. “Becca
, it sounds like your mom did what she thought was the best for the two of you for the future.”

Becca let out a long sigh.
“I know that now. She was focused on living while all I could think of was what we had lost. For a long time, I even blamed myself. What if I had been ready on time and we had gone into the city like we planned? What if I didn’t suggest going to the concert? What if, what if. I drove myself crazy with the ‘what ifs’.”

Nick knew first-hand how that type of guilt
could rip a person apart. He didn’t want to think of Becca feeling that way. “It wasn’t your fault. You were in no way to blame for what happened.”

“Thank you.
I eventually figured that out, too, but it took me some time to come to accept what happened to them. My mother would tell me forgiving yourself was the first step in healing.” Becca smiled again, the admiration and love for her parents showing in her expression. “I was always close with both my parents. But after the accident, mom and I managed to get even closer. I quit school and came back to stay with her full time. That’s when we started baking together. We loved that time, and when she passed away, opening the bakery was the best way I could think of to keep her with me.”

Nick looked at the amazing woman across from him.
He was humbled by her strength and ability to overcome the pain and guilt that had surrounded her for so long. It was something that he hadn’t been able to accomplish. “Your mother isn’t the only one that is strong, Becca.”

Becca hesitated and looked at him.
He could start to see the shimmer of tears building in her eyes. “Thank you, Nick. If I am, then I got my strength from her.” She shook her head and wiped the single tear that escaped from her cheek. “That’s enough about me. How about you? Tell me about your mom and dad.”

Nick’s body instantly stiffened.
He was hoping that their conversation would turn to a happier subject or at least one that was more comfortable. The story of his father and mother was not one that he was accustomed to sharing with others. Very few knew his true opinion. He didn’t make a habit of casually remarking to people about how much distaste he held for both of them.

Nick glanced over at Becca wondering if he could change the topic.
Her green eyes were patiently watching him waiting for his response. She had trusted him enough to share a part of herself with him, and he owed it to her to give at least a small part back.

Their hands were still laced together
, and he started to run his thumb along her wrist. “I can remember my mother and father being happy and in love when I was young. They would talk about the future and their plans for a bigger house, bigger family, and everything we would do together. That changed when his company became more successful and lucrative. My father turned into a different man. His only goal was to become as rich as he could, and he didn’t care who he stepped on or hurt to get there. He just wanted more, destroying everything in his path including our family.”