Ashes To Ashes (Wolf Guard Book 2) (21 page)

I frowned at him and opened my mouth but he beat me to it.

"We're not saying a damn word until we know why he's acting his normal kind of crazy. He doesn't know, or he's getting the chains ready for us right now. Either way, you are not saying a thing until we figure out what happened."

I was a little opposed to lying to Lane, for some reason it didn't sit right within me. Like it was another betrayal and one more strike against my nature that would forever change the way he looked at me. Then again, if he realised I'd fed from him, he'd never again stare at me the way he had today - like I was the sun and he was a solid oak, basking in my radiance. He made me feel important, and I was reluctant and too selfish to lose that. "I don't want to lose him."

Ty gripped my shoulder tightly, "You won't, I promise."

Chapter 27

Steel eyes focused so wholly, they seemed to burn a line straight to my blended soul. That mixture of animal and slinking shadow, like depictions of horrors and fairy tales. And at the very center, immersed in wolf fire and empath darkness, now spun a new colour. One that merged with each defining part of me and settled in so solidly, it was a refusal to ever leave. He had his own silver glow right at the heart of my soul, entrenched between the wolf that wrapped itself around his essence and the empath that stalked a never-ending path around them both. There were now so many parts that made me, I was almost overflowing with stolen vitality. And every time those eyes hit mine, a tug pulled deep in my chest, as if these two halves of the same soul pulled at each other to reunite.

Well, he couldn't have it back. It had been made to be mine since conception, one perfect piece of symmetry to fit a matching hole inside of me. He'd freely given away a piece of himself, and I fully intended on keeping it.

Already, tiny parts of his make-up were rushing through this fledgling connection. A little bit of that pure confidence that all such male wolves possess. That unflinching surety in their own abilities, arrogance in the face of danger and an innate need to dominate every battle. Dominance is an ever shifting entity in wolf packs, that surge for ultimate control based only on which animal claims the better warfare on any given day. Lane may be Alpha now, but that title was only his through lack of challenge. I wonder who will be the first to take that step, the first faltering shift from bowing before the man to raising their tail in dissent.

I pity the first wolf that breaks away from its submissive cage. It'll become a shining example of poor choices.

I'd always wondered how the previous Alpha had kept his title. He'd been a big wolf without question, but he'd lacked that reaching presence that both Lane and Conall had in abundance, Carver slightly more so. Some suggestion of the power they held within that pounded out at the wolves under their command in waves of unbreakable authority. Perhaps he'd claimed a throne that no one else had wanted and now Lane had been left with the discarded pieces.

My wolf pushed inside me, threw her weight against my ribcage, a not so gentle nudge toward the barbarian that coveted her attention. I rolled my eyes and moved silently in his direction, steadily eyeing him for a hint of that danger he so liked to immerse himself in. Ty stood at my back, shuffling feet that slowly followed me, close enough to reach out and drag me away should the Alpha think to put me in chains for my mistake. I'd hope that his wolf would force control in such a situation, he was still however, a bit of a mystery to me. His actions never completely predictable.

I stood looking up at his towering height, fixated on the grey clouds that ran a wandering path over my face and traveled south, to come to rest permanently on my chest. I huffed and elbowed him in the stomach. "Perhaps you could try not looking at my breasts in public."

He frowned and shook his head,"they're mine."

I elbowed him again, relief instantly filling me when he seemed unaware my empath had fed so greedily."You can't claim my boobs."

He looked utterly confused, "already did...bit them."

Scoffed laughter and some kind of hacking filled the large kitchen from directly behind me. I sighed and closed my eyes, I'd imagine the disgust was probably Ty and no doubt, Conall had magically appeared in time for that comment. I glared into those grey clouds, some part of me watching for them to darken in anger, waiting until that exhaustion hit him. "Thanks for that, let's move on shall we?" I could of sworn amusement hid deep within his frowning face - perhaps he was not as confused as he so often made out.

"Conall, is Carver...back yet?"

I turned to find the Irishman grinning at me in undisguised humour, I scowled in response but I found my heart wasn't entirely in it - it was quite hard to be angry with the wolf, he was too like-able for his own good. Carver had left for another shot at finding the Scot, the redhead was becoming a tricky wolf to pin down. 

"Aye, turned up 'bout an hour ago. Been wit' little Red since he got back, returned alone." He took a swallow of whiskey from the ever present tumbler in his large hand.

"No matter, I have a plan...sort of."

I whipped my head around at Lane's rough whisper. It didn't seem a statement that was going to make me particularly happy. "Sort of?" I narrowed my eyes at him.

He smiled, all teeth and a little bit crazed. "It's a good plan."

"Why don't I believe that?"

He only shrugged, a rather innocent movement from a man who was a little too bloodthirsty to ever be innocent. "Get Carver and...Arya, Charlie's training with the guards...I'll get him and meet in the living room." He spoke to Conall though his eyes never left my own.

Conall nodded and left the kitchen in a rush of whiskey scented air. I eyed my big wolf, all tousled, straw coloured hair and twitching sun deepened skin. "How are you feeling? Tired?" I hoped he didn't catch the tiny scent of desperation that filtered unwarranted through my skin, a little bit of pure agony that caught itself on my breath as I tried for nonchalance with every word I spoke.

He frowned that confused look he did so well, "perfect." He paused and studied me for a moment. "You?"

I think my smile trembled a little but stayed on my face nonetheless. "Same. Just..." I fought a tiny war within myself before settling on an easier subject than the one my soul wanted to admit to. "...you won't do anything stupid, right?"

He smiled again and I forgot to breathe in the sun that shone so blindingly. "Stupid is...relative."

Huh. That was a resounding yes then. I groaned and caught a hold of a silent Ty, pulling him toward the fridge and pointing to get him started on some food for everyone - putting him to work before he started opening his big mouth. I pulled items from the deep freezer and handed them over, giving my hands something to do other than reach for Lane. He appeared behind me so silently, even the wolf inside froze for a moment like a mouse beneath the hawks gaze. His arms wrapped around my middle, pulling my back to his chest and covering me in that rain filled scent. His stubbled chin rubbing against the skin of my neck, a little rough against a bite wound still raw and raised. He dropped soft kisses that shivered a lightning storm from nerve to clenching stomach, licking a pathway that had his own wolf rumbling in pleasure with my own.

"Won't be long." He left me with a kiss to the head, a fleeting touch that I unconsciously moved my head to chase after.

I think I blushed a little. Completely uncovered of all trappings, all those hiding places that build themselves around a person, concrete bricks and mortar that stack so orderly to keep everyone else out and your heart solidly safe, knocked down and destroyed to choking dust by one large wolf and his rather odd ways.

"You seem happy, Sash." Ty's voice cut quickly through the rising heat.

I cleared my throat and couldn't quite keep the beaming smile from breaking out. "I am. He's different than what I thought."

Ty nodded and put another tray in the cooker."He doesn't know, does he?"

I lost that smile a little. "No, I don't think he does."

"How's your empath?"

I winced, "happy, sated, perfectly content."

He blew out a breath and leaned against the counter."He's a powerful wolf, Sash. Perhaps he's just able to take that kind of feeding."

I shook my head rather violently. "No, there's no way he wouldn't have felt that." I understood his obsession with empaths, could easily see how that kind of past would dictate his actions for the following two hundred years, and so, never would I believe he couldn't feel that draw of energy.

"Maybe he just doesn't care then?" His tone was quite hopeful, I didn't share the same optimism.

I moved to lean against the counter with him. "I don't see how." The darkening sky brought that veil from day to night. A switch of light's last fleeing bird calls to an owl's eerie screech. The perimeter lights came on in their timed sync and the far wooded land was illuminated once more.

"So we still say nothing."

I flicked my gaze to Ty, worry bleeding out in vivid waves.

He shook his head, "just for now, there's no need to rock the boat. Perhaps you can slowly introduce him to it, if he agrees and the feedings continue to not make him weak, it might work itself out."

I nodded back at him a little miserably. I could not get over the fact that I was lying to him, somewhere between meeting Conall and mating that overgrown wolf, I'd found my conscience - It was mildly annoying. I blew a breath out and stretched before giving myself a bit of a mental shake. "Alright, I'll ask him. Try feeding in small bursts at a time." I sounded a whole lot more confident than I felt.

Tessa's soft footsteps broke the tension that had been slowly climbing in the kitchen, not an argument that either of us planned on winning but more simple frustration for a lack of answers.

"Need some help with the food?"

Probably. That many wolves meant excessive feeding. "Sure," I smiled her way, she was really growing on me with her soft nature and generally calm aura. "Grab the cooked stuff from Ty and take it through."

She balanced five of the large trays that had already been filled and turned back towards the door, I followed her with my own pile and found she'd already laid serviettes and paper plates on the large table opposite the bar.

"Thanks, Tessa."

She smiled widely, something that changed her face from pretty to innocently beautiful. "No problem." She paused a moment while moving out of the way for my load and turned to me with that smile still on her face. "I'm glad I got to know you, Sasha. This place was really starting to become a graveyard."

I frowned at her and moved my own trays to sit beside hers.

"The males left a while ago, many of their mates and family waited here for them to return. None came back."

I gave her my full attention, it seemed the least I could do as I wondered exactly who she'd waited for.

"Everyone was so angry, most still are. But they forget their males chose to leave, made that decision to leave them behind." She sighed with a little frustration. "They spend entirely too much time festering in hate, the world was passing us by and I resented being stuck in the same united mob as they'd become. I welcome the change you've brought, that the Alpha will bring. I can't wait to see how our lives move from this point on."

I watched as her face changed from annoyance to pure pleasure, some switch between past and future. I truly hoped her dreams of what's coming for her were as glorious as she seemed to envision.

"It's good you feel that way, hopefully you're not the only one who looks forward to a little change."

She laughed loudly, a surprisingly booming sound to come out of such a tiny woman."Change is always wanted, Sasha. It's choosing the right vision for the future that's the hard part."