Athica Lane: The Carpino Series (33 page)

He sighs.  I feel him unhook my seatbelt and reach for my face, forcing me to look at him.  He’s fighting back a smile when he asks, “You done?”

I shake my head quickly in his hands, “It’s going to be bad.”

“It’s not going to be bad,” he disagrees.

“Yes, it is.”

He lets go of my face and leans back, digging in his jeans pocket.  When he settles back in his seat, he doesn’t look at me, but reaches for my left hand and I look down at what he’s doing.  I feel my mouth drop as I see a single diamond sitting at the base of my left ring finger.  It’s simple, a square solitaire sitting high on a delicate white gold band.  I don’t even know the official name of a square diamond, but I’ll have to figure that out later.  It’s not huge, but it is larger than small.  What it is is perfect.

“What’s this?” I whisper, not looking away from my hand that he’s still holding in his.

“Baby,” he says, I feel his hand come to my chin and lifting it for me to look at him.  “You go in there tonight and tell your family we’re getting married.  You want to tell them about the baby tonight or wait to tell them, I don’t care.  But if it’s not tonight, it needs to be soon.  It’s good news to me and it will be to them, too.  They’ll be surprised but they love you.  In the end, they’ll be happy.  Do what you want, but one thing’s for certain, we’re getting on with it and we’re starting with this,” he says, giving my hand a squeeze.

“We’re getting on with it?” I ask.

“Yes,” he says and leans in to kiss me.

I look back down at my ring and ask, “When did you get this?”

“This afternoon.”

“But,” I start.  “You said you were going to Home Depot and were only gone for an hour.”

“You don’t like it?” he asks.

I look back up and say softly, “I love it.”

He leans in to kiss me again and asks, “You ready to go in?”

“I guess.”

“Let’s go,” he says and we meet in front of his car where Cam casually takes my hand, as if he didn’t just slide a ring on my finger declaring his intent to keep me forever. 

He walks me up to my childhood home where my entire family is waiting for us.  And there it goes again.  Reality—hitting me like a freight train.

When we walk through the door, we barely make it through the entryway when they start to flock on us—their pecking order obvious—the Carpino women leading the way. 

“You were out there forever, it’s almost time to eat,” Charlotte says.

“Sorry,” I start.

“What took so long?” my mom asks.

“I don’t…” I start to mutter.

My dad walks up and stands beside my mom frowning, “You okay?”

“Uh-huh,” I mumble.

I feel Cam squeeze my hand that’s wearing the ring he just gave me.  I look up and he juts his chin toward the group, silent bossing me to announce…something.  I give him a frown and a small shake of my head.  He frowns back and I get another hand squeeze.

“What’s going on?” Sophia demands.

I look up at Cam and he shakes his head before tucking me into his side.  He looks down one more time and leans in to kiss my forehead before he turns to my family announcing, “We’re getting married.”

There’s an array of responses from our group:  gasps, curses, happy squeals and grunts.  But the only thing I can focus on is my mother’s high-pitched voice, “What?”

Cam pulls me closer, “Yes.  We love each other.”

My mother glares at me, “So soon?”

“Yes,” Cam repeats with resolve.

It’s my dad that levels his eyes on me and tips his head frowning, “You’ve hardly been back together for anytime at all.  You’re sure about this?”

I look up into Cam’s bright blues.  He gives me his content look, telling me it’s all going to be okay.  I let myself melt into him and his goatee tips on one side.  After his arm gives me one more squeeze, I turn fully to my dad.  Cam pulls my back to his front and I say to the man who has always supported me no matter what, “Absolutely.   I’ve never wanted anything more.”

“Have you set a date?” Leigh asks smiling, showing me how happy she is for us.

I feel my eyes get big and turn around, looking up at Cam quickly.  His arm pulls me tighter to his back and looking into my eyes, he answers, “Soon.”

“How soon?” Gabby asks, excited.  She’s probably planning center pieces and floral arrangements in her head. 

“Soon,” I add looking up at Cam.  I continue to plan our shotgun wedding in front of everyone, “We’re getting married in Texas.  At the ranch.”

A slow smile spreads across his face, showing me this makes him happy. 

“Texas?” my mother queries.

Looking back to her, I confirm, “Yes.  I know it’s fall, but it’s warmer there and it’s where Cam grew up.  I can’t think of a better place.”

“But, sweetheart,” my dad asks.  “Why the rush?”

I feel Cam’s hand around my middle drop, splaying across our baby.  A place he’s touched me now more times than I can count in the last day, starting when we woke up this morning.  I look at my parents, not knowing how to answer.  Just when I pull my lip between my teeth, searching for the courage needed to explain the rush, I hear, “You’ve gotta be shitting me.”

I look over where my brother is standing beside his wife.  He’s frowning, but not at me, at Cam. 

“Shit,” I hear in a chuckle and look over to see Jude grinning.

“What?” my mom asks, looking around.

“Oh no,” Charlotte mutters.

Lanny starts to laugh.

Sophia gasps.

Vic grunts.

“Ohmygoodness,” Gabby squeaks.

“Tony,” Leigh says to my brother in a warning.  She turns and grasps his arm, trying to calm her husband.

“What’s going on?” my dad growls, a deep frown playing on his normally patient face.

“Well,” I start and pull in a breath.  “You see…”

“We’re having a baby,” Cam interrupts me.

“You’re pregnant?” my mother cries.

“Yes,” Cam answers for me, taking over the whole situation.  “We’re starting our lives together, we’re getting married and we’re having a baby.  In that order.  And it’s happening soon.”

“But,” my mom starts to argue for some reason.  “You’ve only been back together for two weeks.”

“It’s been longer than that,” I correct her. 

“Oh hell, it was the Sta – ” Charlotte exclaims before I shoot her a dirty look.  She shuts up immediately, but gives me her big eyes.

“Tony, Lizzie,” Cam starts and when I look up to him, he’s looking intently at my parents, delivering a gentle warning.  “This might not be the order of events you would’ve chosen for your daughter, but I can promise you, it would’ve happened anyway.  I love her, my kids love her, she loves us and we’re happy.  At least, she was before we walked in here tonight, but now she’s stressed about all of you.  I don’t want her anxious and I’ll do anything I have to do to make sure she’s nothing but happy about us, our baby and our family.  Now, I’m asking you, do not give her a reason to be worried.”

My family quiets at Cam’s plea (okay, his demand in the form of a plea).  I look at my parents and they both look at us, my dad sighs and my mother’s face relaxes a bit. 

My dad looks at me, “You’re happy?”

I don’t say anything but lean into Cam, nodding my head.

“You’re having a baby,” my mom whispers, as if it’s finally hitting her. 

I smile and feel my stupid, stupid tears again, nodding my answer.

My mom finally moves and Cam lets me go.  I feel her arms come around me and she whispers, “You’re pregnant and you’re getting married?”

“Yes, mom,” I whisper back.

But before I know it, she turns us sideways and still hugging me tight, she says in her big voice but she’s looking straight at my brother, “Do you hear that, Tony?  They’re getting married and they’re inviting everyone!”

The room erupts, but my brother’s head falls back where he looks to the ceiling.  My dad peels me away from my mom and gives me a big hug, but I can feel his sigh when he expresses, “Love you, sweetheart.  We only want the best for you.”

I blink the wetness from my eyes, “I know.”

He gives me a squeeze before my sisters rip me from his arms, yanking my hand to see my ring and start asking me a million questions, along with Leigh and Gabby.

The room was abuzz and all was well in Carpino Land again.  I wipe my face and through the chaos, I catch Cam’s stare from across the room.  His blue eyes are sharp, his gaze full of promise and intent.  He assured me my family would be happy and they are.  I send him a small smile, thinking nothing could be more perfect than right now. 

And I was right, now is perfect.  But I’m Paige Carpino, I’ve always lived in the now.  I’m getting married to the man of my dreams.  I’m going to get to give a baby to the man I love, who loves me back and I already know he’s an amazing father.  My smile gets bigger because it settles inside me and I realize it.   I’m going to get it all.  Everything I ever wanted and even more that I never knew to want with Jordy and Cara. 

I had no idea how quickly things could change.  The idea of my world being rocked in a mere twenty-four hours was out of my realm of possibility, not when the now is so perfect. 

Cam smiles back, as he accepts a drink and a slap on the back.  And I sigh, only having eyes for him, living in the now.  And loving it.

I had twenty-four hours of now before it all came crashing to a dead halt.

“I’m maybe,” Cam pauses, “five, ten minutes behind you.  Jude and Tony are behind me in Jude’s truck.  It shouldn’t take long to get the rest of it.”

It’s Monday night and I just dropped Jordy and Cara off at Sophia’s.  Cam had football practice after school like always and after a quick dinner, we headed to the guy’s softball game.  They won, but they would.  This is old man softball and it’s really not fair to all the old men.  Cam put together a team of hot guys who are in great shape and athletic.  Cam, Jude and Tony forewent a beer in the parking lot after the game to move the rest of my things. 

I have two days to finish moving out of my apartment for good and for the most part, I’m out.  I have a few boxes left and some furniture I’ve decided to keep for the basement guestroom at Cam’s house.

Our house. 

After the initial drama last night with my family, our evening turned into a celebration and we even have a tentative date set for the wedding, after Cam’s football season.  Of course Hattie and Kipp were over-the-moon ecstatic about our news, Kipp stating, “Well, tie me to a hog and roll me ‘n mud, this’s a surprise,” and Hattie screamed over and over, “I do declare! I do declare!” but she never really declared anything, she was just that excited. 

After getting the kids to bed last night, we celebrated for the second night in a row, Cam taking his time with me.  And afterwards, lying naked in the dark wrapped up in Cam, he gently asked me to back off my schedule.  He said he doesn’t like me tired.  I explained I was fine, I was probably tired because of the baby, not to mention all the hormones kicking in.  He then not so gently told me to back off my schedule, to take care of myself and his baby.

This for some reason made me weepy all over again.  Seriously, the hormones are just too much.  Of course, I agreed.  What else was there to do when he asked me to take care of his baby?  The whole thing made me weak with happiness.  Although, I didn’t tell him I’d already planned on backing off.  I’ll just let him think it was his idea.

I barely got my panties on before I fell dead asleep.

Today, I caught up on my blog and website, hung out with the kids after school, dinner, old man softball and now is now.  I hope the rest of the moving goes fast, I’m anxious to be done and officially start the next chapter of my life with the Montgomery’s. 

“That’s fine, I’ve got a few more things to throw in boxes.  I’ll go back and clean tomorrow,” I say as I pull into the parking lot of my complex.  I disconnect my Bluetooth so I can keep talking as I walk up the stairs, “Your sisters both called today, they said they talked to you.  Jen is on a mission to find the biggest white tent in the state of Texas and Ellie was as sweet as ever.”

“Yeah, Jen chewed me up one side and down the other, telling me it’s about time I got my head out of my ass.  Ellie could care less about the wedding, but she’s fucking thrilled about the baby.  She told me it better be a boy so Griff has a cousin to play with.”

I smile as I finish trudging up the stairs, thinking I won’t miss this one bit, “Do you want a boy?”

“Don’t care,” I hear him smile back.  “We’ve got one of each. I only want it to be healthy.”

I put my key in the door and don’t feel it catch, but I’m too happy to think about it.  I move in and toss my purse to the floor.  Kicking the door shut, I say as I flip on the light, “I don’t care either.  But I do want to find out, I don’t think I can take the suspense for nine months – ”

I stop talking and gasp.  Gripping the phone at my ear, I stumble taking a step back, trying to get my hand on the doorknob.

“It’s about time you came back.  I’ve been waiting for you,” he growls, before demanding, “move away from the door.” His eyes, bloodshot and surrounded by dark circles, narrow on me and he twitches the gun that’s casually held in his hand, showing me where he wants me to move. 

“Baby?  You there?” Cam asks in my ear.

Coming out of my surprise, I fumble for the door again when he roars, “Move!”

My body jerks at his outburst and Cam bites out in my ear, “What was that?”

As he points the gun at me, I whisper to Cam, “Brian, what are you doing here?”

“He’s there?” Cam growls.

“Why do you have a gun?” I keep on, talking in the phone.

“Fuck,” I hear in my ear.  “Be calm, baby.  Keep talking to him, I’m coming as fast as I can, but do not hang up.”

“I’m not gonna tell you again.  Move away from the door,” Brian says, standing in the middle of the room.  His voice is shaky and he looks scruffy, unkept.  But it’s his body language that tells the tale.  He’s wound tight, agitated, almost as shaky as his voice.

“Okay,” I breathe, still talking into the phone and to Brian at the same time.  I take three steps sideways, standing in front of the window that faces the breezeway.  The blinds are open by a touch and the door is still unlocked. 

“Hang up the phone,” he jerks the gun that’s sort of dangling from his hand. 

I ignore him, keeping the phone to my ear and beg, “Please, put the gun down so we can talk.  We have so much to talk about.”

“Put down the fucking phone!” he screams and I can’t help but whimper.

“Put it on speaker and set it face down.  I’m coming to you as fast as I can, baby,” he says softly in my ear.  “Keep him talking and stay calm for me, can you do that?”

I let out an audible breath of air and whimper my answer into the phone.

Hating to let go of the only connection I have to Cam, my hand shakes as I pull it from my ear and carefully hit the speaker button.  I drop my hand and lay it face down next to me on the bare end table. 

“Now,” Brian starts.  “Let’s talk about you.  And me.”

*****

Fuck.  I gun it after quickly looking left and right, not seeing anyone, and run the red light.  I keep the phone to my ear as I fist the steering wheel with all my strength, doing everything not to come out of my skin.  It was all I could do to talk to her calmly as I think of her at the hands that guy.  How in the fuck did he get out without us knowing, let alone get a gun?

Looking in my rear view mirror, I see Jude has kept up with me, running the red light and screeching around the turn I just made.  I hear my phone beep with an incoming call, but I don’t dare click away from her. 

“Please, Brian,” I hear her plead.  “Put the gun down so we can talk.”

“So many fucking years,” he ignores her.  “While I was waiting for you, I thought it out.  I was patient because in the end, I knew you’d be mine.”

“Please put the gun down,” I hear her voice crack and I know her so well, I know the tears are coming. 

“Shut up,” he bites.  “He was it for you, wasn’t he?”

“What do you mean?” she asks and I can barely hear her. 

Louder, baby.  I’ve got to hear you. 

“He was your first?” Brian asks with contempt. “You held out all those years. I thought it was gonna be mine, worth waiting on you, with no one else being there before me.  And you gave it to him?”

“Brian,” she starts and I can hear her a bit better.  “Let me call someone.  We can get you the help you need.  I know you can get back to you, but you need help.  Please, let me help you.”

“I don’t need any fucking help!” he screams.  “I’ve been in jail because of you, in a fucking prison hospital because of
you
.  I don’t need anyone’s help, I know what I need.”

“What do you need?” she asks, her voice stronger than before.

“I need – ” I hear him say and then he stops. 

“Brian,” I think I hear movement.  “Let me help you.”

“You can’t help me,” he says, his voice dipping.

I take another turn, ignoring all street signs and see that Jude is keeping up and he’s got his own phone to his ear.

“It wasn’t supposed to be like this,” he keeps on, louder again.  “It was supposed to be me for you.  With you, I was good.  I felt good when we were together, but then it all started falling apart.”

“What started falling apart?” she asks, although I think she’s moved because now I can’t hear her as well.

“Everything,” he says, sounding resigned.

“Brian,” she says louder and stronger.  What the fuck is going on in there?  She goes on to demand, “Put the gun down.”

“All my life, people said it and I fucking hated it more than anything.  ‘You’re just like him,
Brian
.  A mini-fucking-me of him,
Brian
.  Your mom, she’s lucky to have him in you,
Brian’
,” he spits.

“You’re nothing like him,” her voice goes higher, her words coming rushed, more desperate.  “Nothing.  You’re so much better, stronger.”

“I’m not,” he says, defeated.

“Remember,” she starts her voice quick and clipped.  “The year we met?  We were juniors.  You helped me through that programming class with that awful professor.  I never would have made it through without you.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Brian mumbles.

“It does,” she keeps on.  “All the hours we spent on projects.  Laughing and having fun while we worked.  You demanded I make you cookies for all the help, but I know you would’ve helped me all the same.  You helped me then, let me help you now.”

“That was too long ago,” he refutes.

“Put the gun down,” she begs louder and more desperate than she’s sounded yet.  “For me, please.  Put it down for me.”

I take the last turn, and fucking finally, turn into the lot on what feels like two wheels.  My tires screech and looking back, I don’t see Jude. He must’ve been held up somewhere.  I jump out of my car, barely taking the time to throw it in park and run flat out, faster than I’ve ever run before. 

With my phone to my ear, listening, I only think of them.  Paige, our child.  Getting to them as fast as I fucking can.

*****

“What’s that noise?” he comes alert, looking beyond me toward my phone on the coffee table.

“Brian,” I plead through my tears trying to get him to forget about my phone.  “Talk to me, just you and me.  Like it used to be.”

His gun isn’t trained on me any longer.  He’s been waving it around as he rants, holding it to the side of his head as he drags his hands through his hair out of frustration or letting it dangle loosely by his side.   I can’t know for sure, but I don’t think he came here to hurt me.  However, I cringe at the thought of what he could do, especially with a gun in his hand and talking about his dad.

“It’ll never be like that again,” he focuses back on me, his eyes pained, his face tight.  “It could’ve been perfect, but I lost you.”

“You didn’t lose me.  I can help you,” I cry out to him.

“I’m just like him,” his voice drops.

“No,” I press louder, shaking my head quickly.  “You’re not.”

“Just like him,” he repeats with his eyes on me intently.

Just when I was about to beg, plead or heaven forbid, something more desperate, the door bursts open behind me.  Brian, whose temperament was softening just moments ago, becomes tense and he brings his gun up and when I turn, he’s pointing it at Cam.

“No!” I shriek.

“Him?” Brian yells.  “You had him on the phone listening, didn’t you?”

“Hey now,” Cam calls for him in a low controlled voice.  He takes a step in toward me, leaving the door standing wide.  He puts his hands out low, proving he’s unarmed and demands, “Let her go.”

“Get the fuck out,” Brian demands. 

“Paige,” Cam calls for me while never taking his eyes off Brian.  “Come to me. Slowly.”

“Don’t move!” Brian yells.

I look quickly between them with the gun pointed at Cam.  Losing it, I yell, “Put it down!”

“Baby – ” Cam calls for me when all of a sudden, Jude is in the doorway with his own weapon.  It’s pointed straight at Brian, but he holds his with confidence and determination.

“FBI.  Drop the gun,” Jude commands.

Cam takes a step closer to me, a mere three feet outside of reaching distance.  He feels so close, yet he’s never felt so far. 

“Drop it!” Jude yells.

Brian’s eyes dart between Jude, pointing a gun at him and Cam’s controlled movements.  That’s when I see it.  The change in his eyes.  He looks defeated when his elbow gives, but his hand doesn’t drop.  I frown when I see him lift it higher.

“Paige, come to me,” I hear Cam say quickly, but I only have eyes for Brian. 

“No,” I whisper.

Brian looks into my eyes and lifts it higher until it comes up to his head.

And the next moment in time, a moment that transpired so fast, so quick, that all things occurred simultaneously…

*****

“No!” I scream.

I hear Jude mutter, “Fuck,” as he moves his firearm fractionally, by what would seem to be an insignificant measure, and brace.

My body, of its own accord, starts to move toward Brian.  I’m an infinitesimal distance from him, but feel a hand on my arm squeeze tight. 

“Get her!” my brother’s voice rings while Cam yells, “Paige, no!”