Back to Me (19 page)

Eight hours after finally confessing her love to Sergio-Xavier, Paige stood behind the stage at Restoration Ministries, praying for the strength to lead the church into high worship and praise for the eleven o'clock service. She had learned only minutes earlier that the scheduled worship leader for the second service had called in sick. As the assigned backup, Paige had to fill in. Any other Sunday, Paige would have been ecstatic about singing for the Lord, but today her spirit was too uneasy to act out the joy she'd become accustomed to faking. Today claiming something she didn't possess seemed pointless, and so did speaking manufactured church lingo.

When the usher asked how she was doing this fine Sunday morning, Paige responded, “Tired and sleepy,” instead of the usual “Blessed and highly favored.” She wasn't mad or angry. She wouldn't say she was happy, but she was content. Something inside her had changed, but unable to identify what, Paige attributed it to fatigue.

After taking a cold shower last night and praying, she had called Sergio-Xavier and they had talked half the night about everything, anything, and nothing. When they started arguing over who should hang up the phone first, Paige realized she'd never slowed down long enough to have a boyfriend or to be courted. She wanted that experience with Sergio-Xavier, but she hadn't reconciled how he fit into her plans for Seniyah and the baby.

The first chords of the overture played by the band redirected her focus to the task at hand. After entreating the Lord to anoint her voice once more, Paige walked to the center of the platform and removed the microphone, and after a brief exhortation, she closed her eyes and offered the one thing she knew God accepted from her—worship.

 

 

“Girl, the Lord anointed you today,” Reyna said when Paige slipped into the seat she'd saved for her on the second row after praise and worship.

“To God, be the glory.” Paige looked down the row and greeted with a wave the Jenningses and the Scotts, who were seated next to Reyna and Tyson. They returned the greeting, then directed their attention back to the screen displaying upcoming events.

“Is there enough room for me?”

Paige's head jerk created a domino effect. As if on cue, seven heads, including baby Destiny's, turned sideways, and everyone gaped at Sergio-Xavier, who was standing at the end of the row.

Elation didn't begin to describe how Paige felt. He'd called her this morning just to say, “Good morning, love. Have a peaceful and blessed day.” Then he'd hung up. Now he stood within inches of her, looking fine as ever with that defined dimple.

“There's always room for you.” She offered him a smile and then sneered at her friends down the row. “Move over,” she ordered.

Kevin and Tyson chuckled and exchanged high fives before waving at Sergio-Xavier and scooting down the row. Reyna was too busy giggling to move her stuff fast enough. Paige pushed the baby's diaper bag out of the way.

“Thanks, sweetheart,” Sergio-Xavier whispered in her ear.

“What are you doing here?” She was the reason he was there, but she wanted to hear him say it. He didn't disappoint her.

“I wanted to hear you sing.”

“Oh,” she said, pouting. “Praise and worship just ended.”

“I know. I've been here since the beginning of the service. I didn't know where you were sitting, so I stayed in the back until you were done, and then followed you to your seat.” He squeezed her hand. “You really blessed me today.”

“How did you know I'd be the lead today? I wasn't scheduled.”

He shrugged. “An unction, I guess.”

Paige blushed and turned away, only to find the attention of everyone in the row glued on her instead of on the big-screen announcements. Thanks to their nosiness, her friends wouldn't know anything that was going on at church.

“Mind your business,” she mouthed and then rested against Sergio-Xavier's arm.

Unlike the previous time they attended a church service together, this time felt normal. They shared Bibles and took notes, even commented briefly on key points. It felt as if they were one, like a missing part of her had suddenly been reconnected. During the prayer after the sermon, they held hands, but instead of praying for strength and healing like Pastor Drake had instructed, Paige tried to envision Sergio-Xavier's role in the life of the child she planned to raise.

Mother Scott and First Lady Drake made a beeline to her immediately after the benediction. This time Paige didn't attempt to run away. She opened her arms and embraced them both. After the Simone interrogation, she'd gained a new appreciation for the bossy pair.

“God sure is working in your life!” First Lady Drake exclaimed. “I've never seen you look this good. You're not there yet, but you are well on the way.”

“On the way to what?” Paige asked, but the prayer warriors carried on the conversation as if Paige weren't there.

“About three more all-night prayer sessions ought to do it,” Mother Scott concurred. “She'll be good and ready by then, and tired of faking too.” She then turned to Sergio-Xavier. “Just a few more kinks and you'll be ready too. Now that you've stopped lying to yourself and everybody else.”

“I appreciate your prayers.” Sergio-Xavier leaned in and kissed both women on the cheek. “One can't help but get right and stay right with the two of you on the job.”

“That's what we're here for.” Mother Scott interlocked her arm with Sergio-Xavier's. “Since you're practically family now, I have a question for you.”

“Mother Scott, don't!” Paige reached for Mother Scott's hand to keep her from saying something that would embarrass her. As always, her effort was in vain.

“Calm down, girl. We claimed your snobbish, rude, judgmental, and full-of-attitude self as a daughter a long time ago. If we can accept you, we can accept him too. Besides, he's cute,” Mother Scott declared.

“Yes, Lord,” First Lady Drake agreed in a soft tone. “You hit the jackpot and don't even know it.”

Paige wanted to hit Mother Scott for dissecting her character perfectly and Sergio-Xavier for laughing.

Mother Scott cleared her throat and continued speaking to Sergio-Xavier. “Like I was saying, you're one of those brain doctors, aren't you?”

“Yes, I'm a neurologist.”

“I've been having these headaches. What do you think it could be?”

“I don't believe this. The prayer warrior seeking free medical advice,” Paige grumbled and turned to leave. Unfortunately, her friends were lying in wait.

Reyna attacked first with an uncharacteristic bear hug. “I'm so happy for you.”

Marlissa joined in, making it a group hug. “You two look so good together. And you're glowing.”

“No, I'm not,” Paige snapped with less fire than normal.

“Yes, you are,” Tyson said, giving her a hug. “Congratulations,” he said out loud and then whispered in her ear, “I told you it would happen.”

For once, pangs of envy over Tyson's happiness didn't attack her. “Thank you.”

“I'll collect my finder's fee in the form of free real estate services for a lifetime,” Kevin teased before embracing her.

She stepped back, and with one hand on her hip and a finger wagging in their faces, Paige prepared to tell her friends exactly what she thought of their little matchmaking scheme. “That reminds me. The next time you feel the urge to butt into my love life, or lack thereof, don't! I don't need your help,” she scolded.

“That's because she has me now,” Sergio-Xavier said, butting in, having completed Mother Scott's free consultation. “And I'll make sure she never lacks anything.”

The wink that accompanied his promise crushed Paige's emotional protective wall. She had to regain control before she turned into mush before her friends. “What you need to remember is, I'm an independent woman. I'm not some needy and helpless woman who needs a rescuer. I can take care of myself,” she asserted.

Sergio-Xavier turned to Kevin. “Man, I don't know if I should thank you for connecting me to this woman or punch you in the face.”

Paige's gasp was overshadowed by the group's laughter.

“I love this woman,” Sergio-Xavier declared, placing his arm around her, “but I'd pay good money to tame that mouth.”

At that moment, it was
his
mouth that Paige wanted to tame. Sergio-Xavier had just publicly declared his love for her, and if the relationship didn't work out, everyone would believe it was her fault.

“Would you like to join us for dinner?” Reyna offered between giggles. “There's more than enough food.”

“Thank you,” Sergio-Xavier answered before Paige could. “But we'll have to take a rain check. Our plane leaves in an hour.”

Paige had no idea what he was talking about, but she played along. “Yeah, we'd better get going.” She tugged his sleeve. “Come on, honey. We don't want to be late.” They started walking down the aisle. “See you busybodies next week,” Paige called over her shoulder.

“Why did you lie in church, Minister Simone?” she asked him as they neared the door.

“I didn't lie, sweetheart. I booked reservations at my favorite seafood restaurant in Los Angeles. The family plane is waiting at Oakland International.” Her steps slowed. “I hope you don't mind,” he added. “The place has a spectacular view of the coastline. I know you're going to love it.”

“It's not that I mind. I just forgot you have it like that.”

“Being my lady has many privileges,” he said once they were in the confines of his car. “I hope you're ready for the ride.”

Paige tried her hand at flirting. “I'm yours. Take me anywhere.”

He chuckled and kissed her cheek. “In time, sweetheart, in time.”

Paige relaxed in the leather seat and for once enjoyed the moment. She didn't remember she'd signed up to visit the sick and the shut-in with the home care ministry until the plane landed at LAX. Although she felt bad for breaking a commitment, she didn't have an ounce of regret for spending quality time with the man she loved.

“What?” Paige stopped singing long enough to ask this question when she walked into the office Monday morning with just minutes to spare before the weekly staff meeting. The receptionist and the agents roaming about had stopped mid-stride and stared.

“Nothing. I assumed you were already in your office.” The receptionist looked down at her watch. “You're usually the first one here. It's almost nine thirty. And you're singing?” She leaned over the desk. “And you're wearing bright orange? Are you ill?”

Paige set the pastry box she'd been carrying down on the desk. “I'm great,” she sang with a giddiness she couldn't control, and spun around. “Isn't this gorgeous? I never thought I would look good in this color.”

“You look good in it, but if you don't hurry, you'll be late starting the meeting.”

Everyone at Highpoint Real Estate was well aware of Paige's obsession with punctuality. Most agents arrive thirty minutes early for the weekly meetings to avoid tardiness. This morning Paige couldn't care less about time or the meeting, but since she made the meetings mandatory, she'd decided to make an appearance.

She patted the box. “Take these to the conference room. I'll be in there soon.”

Paige strolled down the hall, wishing Sergio-Xavier was beside her and they were strolling down Rodeo Drive, like they were doing fifteen hours ago. After a succulent lobster meal, Sergio-Xavier had treated her to a mini shopping spree on the famous strip. Her bounty included two dresses, a designer purse, and a pair of stilettos with the exclusive red bottom. While Sergio-Xavier had been getting measured for a tailored suit, Paige had sneaked out and purchased a red leather miniskirt for when the “in time” that her man had promised came.

She should have been tired after the long, physically and emotionally draining weekend, but she wasn't. This morning, following mediation and a brief phone prayer with Sergio-Xavier, Paige had put the finishing touches on the nursery, and then she'd gone for a run around the track at the local high school. She'd forgotten how much she loved running until the wind stroked her cheeks and her ponytail bounced rhythmically, in sync with her strides. As she rounded the sixth lap, Paige vowed to incorporate running back into her daily routine. The real estate office wouldn't fold if she came to work at 9:00 a.m. instead of 7:00 a.m. The time she'd spent working from home and creating the nursery had proven that.

Upon entering her office, Paige set her briefcase on the floor against her desk, and after booting her computer, she printed copies of the agenda for the meeting. She turned to leave the office, and just as she reached the door, her cell phone chimed.

“Hey, you,” she said and giggled into the phone after checking the caller ID.

“How's your morning?” Sergio-Xavier asked, as if they hadn't talked already this morning.

“Better now.” Paige leaned against the door and chatted like she didn't have a roomful of people waiting for her.

“Promise me that you'll go straight home after DWAP and get some rest.”

Paige hesitated before answering. She had plans to stop by Seniyah's house after the meeting. “I will go straight home when I'm done,” she answered evasively.

“I'm serious, sweetheart. You had a long weekend, and you have a busy week ahead. I don't want you to wear yourself out.”

Being in an exclusive relationship had its advantages, but she wasn't sure if Sergio-Xavier's protectiveness was normal. “So, are you my daddy now?”

“No, but as your man, it's my job to look out for your well-being. It's one of the benefits.”

Her breath caught. No one but her father had said that to her or even implied it. She swallowed a shallow response and spoke from her heart. “I like your benefits package. Thanks for looking out. You were a good friend, but you're an outstanding boyfriend.” A knock on the door reminded her of the time. “Babe, I have to go, but I'll talk with you later. Get some rest. That ‘looking out' rule works both ways.”

“I love you, too. Talk to you later. I have to contact the construction company.”

Paige stuffed the phone in her pocket and darted to the conference room. She was halfway through the productivity report when Sergio-Xavier's statement registered. He was ready to build his home.

 

 

“I am so proud of you!” Paige hollered. With only three weeks left in the program, DWAP had not only reached its goal of five thousand necklaces sold, but had also exceeded it by 20 percent. They had enough capital to purchase five hundred blankets at wholesale for the shelter.

“Are you really proud of us?” Jasmine asked. “Or are you just saying that? We worked really hard and did everything you said.”

For once, Paige recognized Jasmine's need for her approval. She used the pronoun
us,
but judging by the expectancy dancing in her eyes, she had really meant
me
.

Paige patted her shoulder. “Of course, I mean it. You're going to do well in junior college.”

“Well, actually, we've been thinking that our grades aren't that bad. Maybe we should . . . ,” Jasmine began. “Never mind. Thank you.”

Paige overlooked the longing that covered the girls' faces. She couldn't identify the source of it, and at the moment she didn't have time to inquire about it. If the session ran over, it would be too late to stop by Seniyah's house to present her proposal.

“Since we have only three sessions left, we should start planning our last session. Each of you will receive a certificate of completion signed by the regional program director, and I will issue special recognition awards. We'll also have refreshments. I can reserve the performing arts room. It should be large enough to accommodate your family and friends.”

Her statement was met by silence.

“Well?” Paige asked when no one offered any input.

For once Jasmine turned away and allowed someone else to answer. “Ms. Paige, we don't need that much room. Our families don't usually attend things like that,” the girl explained. “Between the seven of us, we might get twelve people to come, and five of them will be kids, and the other seven, our boyfriends. Our mamas who aren't on drugs are too busy with man problems to care. At least Jasmine has her brother. That's why we stick together. We're all we got.”

“Well, I . . .” Paige searched for an answer and couldn't find one. In theory, she knew their family dynamics presented challenges, but the reality of those challenges had never set in until now. Had she been too consumed with Seniyah to notice? She shook the thought away. Seniyah needed her help.

“If that's the case, why don't we hold the celebration off campus?” said a male voice.

Simultaneously all heads turned toward the voice. Paige hadn't seen Sergio-Xavier standing in the doorway, and she was sure the divas hadn't, either.

He stepped completely inside the room. “I know of the perfect beachfront restaurant that would give us a private room. A buddy of mine owns a limousine service, and I'm sure I can get him to donate us a vehicle for the evening.”

With renewed excitement, the divas surrounded him.

“For real? Dr. Simone, you wouldn't play us, would you?” Jasmine asked.

“Never. If Ms. McDaniels agrees, I'll make the arrangements.”

I love this man, but why is he here?
Paige thought, but she said, “I don't think it will be a problem moving the celebration off-site as long as we have parental consent.”

“Give us the form and we'll sign it. I mean, we'll take it home and bring it back signed,” Jasmine said, correcting herself.

The divas started the celebration right then, and there with high fives and dancing.

“This will make up for two proms I missed,” one of the girls stated.

While the divas made plans for the big event, Paige pulled Sergio-Xavier aside. “What did you just do, and why?” she demanded more than asked.

“Sweetheart, don't let your mouth blow it for these young ladies,” he warned with a smile. “I simply gave them something to look forward to. You heard for yourself. All they have is each other. You just finished raving about the outstanding job they've done. Their families aren't there for them. Somebody has to celebrate their accomplishments to keep them feeling encouraged. Didn't you hear what she said? She missed both of her proms.”

She smiled back. “I get it, but why do you have to be the one?”

“Why do you have to be the one for Seniyah?”

Her smile fell, but she didn't offer an answer.

“I admire those young ladies for trying. They could have given in to the elements and become a statistic, but they didn't. For that alone, they deserve a standing ovation. A night on the town for them isn't going hurt me one bit. It's as simple as making a phone call. You'd be surprise how many people are willing to help those who help themselves. In fact, if they set their goal beyond junior college, I'd be more than willing to make sure they reach it.”

“Ms. Paige,” Jasmine called out, interrupting them, “you wear long gowns to formal events, right?”

“That's right,” Paige answered through a manufactured smile.

“Good. We decided we want to go formal. To make sure we don't look like hoochies, can you help us pick out patterns? My cousin Porsche can make our dresses, but she doesn't have any class. She can sew, but she dresses like a . . .” Jasmine paused. “You get my point.”

“Sure. Of course, I will,” Paige answered, trying not to laugh.

“See, sweetheart? Not only do these ladies need your help, but they also
want
your help,” Sergio-Xavier whispered in her ear.

His statement held a dual message that Paige wasn't ready to receive. She'd gone too far to turn back. “Why are you here?” She had to change the subject.

“I came here to make sure you went straight home. I'm not nearly as slow as I look. I caught that evasive response over the phone. You're done after this session. Don't worry about dinner. It's in the car.”

Paige rolled her eyes and stomped away. Maybe having Sergio-Xavier as her man wasn't so great, after all. They needed to have a talk soon. He needed to understand his place in her life. He was mistaken if he thought her love for him was enough to make her abort her plan.

 

 

After Sergio-Xavier followed her home, Paige ate, showered, and then stretched out in her bed and watched a Lifetime movie. Halfway through the romantic comedy, she admitted that Sergio-Xavier had been right. She did need some rest. She also needed to call her mother and tell her the good news.

Her mother answered on the second ring. “Hey, baby. I'm enjoying this caller ID. I've been avoiding them telemarketers like the plague. What's going on with you?”

Paige went straight to the point. “I have a boyfriend, man, significant other ,whatever the politically correct term is. I got one.”

“What? Is it serious?” her mother screamed into the phone.

“We're in love, if that's what you mean.”

“Thank you, Jesus!” her mother yelled into the phone. Then Paige heard her tell her father, “Our prayers have been answered.”

For once Paige wished she could freely express her excitement.

“Tell me about him,” her mother ordered.

Paige leaned back, stroking the pillow. “Let's see. He's two years older than me. He's African American, Latino, and French and over six feet tall. He's a minister and a neurologist.”

“Hallelujah!” her mother screamed into the phone. “He's the one!”

Paige shook her head, as if her mother could see her. “Ma, you don't even know his name.”

“He's a minister and a doctor. I don't care what his name is. It could be Donald Duck, for all I care. I'll be the proud mother of Mrs. Reverend Doctor Donald Duck.”

Paige laughed along with her mother, but that wasn't the only news she wanted to share. “Mom, how do you feel about another addition to the family, say, a baby?”

“You know you ain't supposed to be giving the goodies away before he puts a ring on it, but the Lord can forgive you for that too. When is the baby due?”

“Oh, no, Ma, I'm not pregnant. We're not having sex. I was just asking because—”

Her mother cut her off. “Good, because I don't want you to make the same mistake I made with your daddy, but if you do, I got your back. Now, tell me how y'all met, and don't leave anything out.”

What had started out as a pleasant evening transformed into despair within seconds. Paige thought that she could confide in her mother and that her mother understand her plan, but that wasn't the case. Everyone seemed to be against her. First, Sergio-Xavier had ruined her evening by showing up and foiling her plan to visit Seniyah, and now her mother was ready to marry her off to a man who might not fit into the grand scheme of things. After indulging her mother, Paige cried herself to sleep for what she vowed would be the last time.