Back to the Heart (5 page)

Ana, dear, help me box up some of the groom’s cake so that the guests can take it home.” Molly approached them. Ana couldn’t be happier for the distraction. It would help her to get her mind off Ryan, if only for a little while.

She left Ryan alone to follow her mother to the cake table. “You fold the boxes, I’ll put the cake in the boxes,” Molly told Ana.

They continued working in silence for a while before Molly finally spoke. “So are you having a good time?”

I suppose. I’m glad it’s almost over, though.” Ana sighed. It had been a long day. Ana would sleep soundly tonight.

I’d never be able to tell.” Molly cast a smile over at her daughter.

Well, I’ve got to at least pretend I have energy.”

That’s not what I’m talking about.” She shook her head, and a twinge of discomfort shot through Ana’s heart.

Oh?”

“You and Ryan have been awfully close tonight.”

Ana groaned. “Can we not talk about this? Celia already lectured me about him once tonight.”

Oh, did she?” Molly grinned.

Yes. She kindly reminded me that he’ll be gone in a week. I’m well aware of that, and I assure you that nothing is going on between me and Mister Black.”

That’s a pity. I’m quite fond of him.” Her mother frowned at the piece of cake she was boxing.

Mother! You know I just got over being hurt by a man.”

I know. But I don’t think Ryan is like that.”

What do you mean you don’t think Ryan is like that?”

He’s just a sweet kid.” Molly shrugged. “He seems genuine. And it’s quite obvious he likes you.” A smile crept into her voice.

Ana looked over her shoulder to find Ryan, and her cheeks heated up when she noticed he was staring at her from across the room. Somehow, he had managed to integrate himself into a group of David’s friends, though he kept his gaze fixed on her while he spoke. She could only imagine what he was saying about her.

I don’t need to get hurt again.”

I was kind of hoping you could make him stay. He’s been doing an amazing job around the house. He’d make a great son-in-law.”

Mom!” Ana’s mouth fell agape.

Well, I’m just speaking my mind, is all. You could do a lot worse.”

A lot worse than a . . .” She almost said vagabond before she remembered that Ryan had a life somewhere else. “He doesn’t belong here.” The words sounded colder than they needed to.

You didn’t think you did either.” Her mother offered her a smile.

You ladies need some help?” Ryan’s voice came over Ana’s shoulder, making the hair on the back of her neck stand up. How long had he been there?

This is women’s work, Sunshine. You do enough at the ranch. Go enjoy yourself.” Molly beamed at him.

I don’t mind at all. I’ve never been one to believe in gender roles.” Ryan grabbed a box, stepping up beside Ana to begin folding it. Knowing he was so close to her made Ana tense up. She glanced over at him, and he smiled, a sweet smile that melted her to the core. He was so helpful, and he fit into her family so well. Ana already knew it would break her heart when he had to leave. “I’m going to stay after everyone leaves and help you ladies clean up too.”

Molly reached across Ana to caress Ryan’s cheek with her hand. The way her mother looked at Ryan made Ana’s heart ache. She was every bit as in love with him as Ana was, though in a different way. Ana could tell that Molly thought of Ryan as the son she’d never had. She couldn’t help but wonder how hurt her mother would be when Ryan left too.

You’re an angel, Sunshine,” Molly said, and he simply reached up and gave her hand a squeeze.

Ana began to feel out of place. It was another reminder of how much had changed.

How long were you in New York?” Ryan asked.

Five years. I left here as soon as I graduated from college.”

Why did you leave?” He quirked an eyebrow, never missing a beat in his box folding.

Ana sighed, feeling bad talking about it in front of her mother. Her parents had both begged her not to go, but she was stubborn and refused to listen. “Because I wanted to experience more of life than just this. Bandera is small. Everyone knows everyone.”

You could have just moved into San Antonio. That would have been a lot closer,” her mother interjected.

San Antonio was too close. I wanted to be far away.” It sounded harsh, but it was true. In San Antonio, Ana still wouldn’t have felt like her life was her own. Her parents had always been there for her, picking her up whenever she fell. She wanted to be somewhere they couldn’t just dust her off. But after five years of living on her own, she had still ended up back home, needing her mother’s support.

Was it so bad out here for you?” Molly sounded heartbroken.

No.” She shook her head. “I just didn’t feel like I belonged.”

Sometimes,” Ryan spoke up, “where you think that you don’t belong is exactly where you need to be.” He smiled at her then, and the bitterness of her past was vanquished from the room. Her mother was right to call him Sunshine. He knew exactly how to chase away the rain.

Ana stood with the other single ladies as Celia turned her back to them to throw the bouquet. She had no intention of going for it. With a baby on the way, marriage was the farthest thing from her mind. Best to leave it for a girl who had a chance at a perfect life.

Ryan grinned at her from one of the tables. There was a hopeful look in his eyes, like he wanted her to catch the bouquet. Part of her hated to disappoint him, but she just didn’t have the energy to go for it. Besides, marrying him was a pipe dream anyway.

Celia made the toss, and several of the girls went for the flowers like their lives depended on it. Ana stayed back. Bouquet-catching could be risky business. She had once seen a girl get a bloody nose when another girl accidentally punched her in her attempt to get the bouquet.

Better luck next time,” she said as she retreated to sit by Ryan. There was no point in avoiding him. He obviously wasn’t going to let that happen.

I guess that means I’m up.” Ryan stood to go do the garter toss.

He put a lot more vigor into it, though it wasn’t necessary. Most of the guys avoided the garter like it was a grenade. If anything, Ryan was taking one for the team.

He returned to Ana with a grin on his face, twirling the blue-and-white lace garter on his finger like it was the prize of a lifetime. “Looks like I’m next,” he said, winking at her.

In a week or so, he’d go back to wherever he came from, find a nice girl, and settle down. And Ana would still be in Bandera, pregnant and living with her mother, pathetic and alone. She rubbed the swell of her stomach.

With the festivities over, everyone gathered around outside to see the happy couple off. Ana’s eyes watered as Celia and David drove away in his truck with the words “Just Married” written in white shoe polish on the back window, and empty cans dangling off the ball hitch. Ana wasn’t the only one. Molly had tears streaming down her face as well. She stepped up next to her elder daughter and threw an arm around her neck, half whispering, half sobbing, “There she goes. My little girl is all grown up.”

We were grown up long before Celia got married,
Ana thought. Heck, Celia was only two years younger than Ana. All of their friends were already married. They were the late bloomers of the bunch, and Ana was blooming still, skipping the marriage stage in preparation for motherhood.

It was bittersweet watching her sister drive away, closing an old chapter of her life and opening a new one. All Ana could hope was that they’d live happily ever after. That was all anyone wanted for a sibling.

She stood there and stared out into the street long after her sister left. It felt like she and her mother were stuck in time. However, they couldn’t linger on it for too long. There were guests to see off and a reception hall to clean up. Unfortunately, both of Celia’s bridesmaids had to go home, which left Ana, Molly, and Ryan to clean up the whole mess by themselves. It was going to be a long night.

Oddly, this wasn’t the first time a stranger had invited Ryan to their wedding. It was, however, the first time he’d attended, and for that reason, he would never forget this wedding. Not to mention the fact that he got to spend most of the night dancing and wooing his dream woman.

The fun part was over, though.

Ryan made sure Ana got the easiest part of the cleanup, boxing the rest of the food with her mother while he went around the reception hall gathering trash, stacking chairs, and sweeping up. He could hear the two of them talking, wondering how long it would take for Celia and David to get pregnant with a baby of their own. All Ryan could think about was how he was going to convince Ana that he would make a marvelous father for her child. If everything worked out as planned, Ana would soon be following her sister’s lead in tying the knot.

It was almost midnight when the three of them finished cleaning the reception hall. Ana’s entire body ached from the day’s labor. It had been a long time since she had a day so full of activities: decorating the reception hall, getting dressed up for the wedding, getting Celia ready, participating in the ceremony, taking pictures, dancing more than she’d danced in ages, and now tearing everything down again.

Ana was so exhausted she didn’t even think to argue when Ryan offered her a ride home. They loaded up the leftover food in her mother’s car, and then they both hugged Molly before Ana climbed up into the passenger seat of Ryan’s old beat-up pickup truck. He had a crappy vehicle for a supposed businessman. She hoped he hadn’t said all those things just to impress her.

Where’d you get the tux?” she asked while they pulled out of the church parking lot. Ana remembered the brown duffle bag that Ryan had with him in the barn. Shouldn’t he have a suitcase too? Now that she thought about it, he wasn’t businessman-like at all.

I rented it this morning,” he told her, keeping his eyes on the road.

Her gaze fell to his hand, wrapped around the stick shift, so close to her thigh that she could almost feel the heat from his skin. Exhausted as she was, she didn’t want the night to end. Ryan was so sweet, and while she knew she shouldn’t allow him to get any closer to her, she still wanted to know more about him.

How long have you had this truck?” By the looks of it, the answer was forever. The cloth on the seats was frayed in places, the black vinyl on the steering wheel was worn bare, and the inside of the truck smelled like oil and sweat. Ana rolled down the manual window to catch a whiff of the fresh night air.

I’ve had it for six months.”

Definitely not something a businessman would want, she decided. He was hiding something, but what was it? Maybe she could unravel his mystery if they spent enough time together. But wasn’t that a bad idea? It annoyed Ana that her hormones fought so hard against her sense of logic.

Even though she should end the night with him dropping her off at the house, she couldn’t resist the urge to invite him in for coffee.

He gave her a queer look, as if to say:
Do we really need to stay up all night after all the work we’ve just done?
But the words that came out of his mouth were, “I’d love some coffee.”

Molly hugged them both and headed to bed, in no mood to stay up any longer when she had to get back to her duties first thing in the morning.

There was a war raging inside of Ana, the familiar struggle between right and wrong. She had felt the same pull when Rick had asked her out at work. Back then, she’d been a lot less wary of the consequences. The worst that could happen was that she might lose her job. Now she was back in Texas when she should still be in New York.

Not only had Rick dumped her when she told him she was pregnant, he had also fired her and given every company she applied for a bad reference so that she couldn’t get hired anywhere else in New York. He had stained her name, made her sound like a no-good liar and cheat. With Ana unable to get a new job, her savings had dwindled to the point that when her apartment lease finally came due, she had no other choice but to come back home.

As Ana started the coffeemaker, she wondered about the worst thing that could happen if she allowed herself to be with Ryan. He couldn’t get her pregnant again, that was for certain. But he could, and would, break her heart. In a week, he’d come up with an excuse as to why he needed to leave her behind and return to his real life. She would just be a fling to him. And he’d be etched on her heart forever.