Beautifully Unbroken (32 page)

Cooper checked her pulse. “It’s still strong,” he said. “We must have gotten here just in time. Call 911,” he demanded.

“Don’t you die! Don’t you dare die on me!” I cried as I grabbed my phone and dialled for the paramedics.

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. It felt like an eternity until the paramedics arrived. While we waited, I begged Casey over and over again to acknowledge that I was there, but she was so limp, so weak, so out of it. The paramedics asked us many questions, but I didn’t know any of the answers; I had no idea how many pills she had taken or how much she had drunk. I felt guilty that I hadn’t even been there when it happened.

I rode in the ambulance alongside Casey to the hospital. Cooper insisted on following behind to make sure that I was okay as well as Casey. I tried Alex’s number over and over again, but to no avail.
He should be the one here with Casey, not me
, I thought. He was being stubborn, and it was now truly beginning to piss me off.

It felt like the longest night of my life waiting for news on my best friend. What if I had got to her too late? What if the person who was trying to take my life had succeeded? Casey would have been left by herself; she would have died. A million different thoughts were running through my mind as we waited in the cold waiting room.

“She’s going to be okay, Jo,” Cooper said, bringing my attention back to the here and now.

“What if we hadn’t got to her in time, Cooper? What if I had been hit by that car? We could both be dead now.”

“But you’re not,” he stated firmly.

“But we could have been.”

“Are you always a cup-half-empty kind of girl?” Cooper asked, smiling slightly.

“At the moment, my cup is completely empty,” I sighed. “I just want to be happy, Cooper. But every time I’m happy, this happens: pain, fear, heartache, everything. All I want is to be happy. Is that too much to ask?”

Cooper watched me carefully as he considered what I had just told him “No. It’s not too much to ask at all, Jo,” he said sadly. “Look, I need to make a call. I’ll be right back.” He stood and headed to the door.

“Cooper?” He turned back to look at me. “Thank you,” I said.

His mouth lifted into a genuine smile. “That’s what friends are for, Jo.”

The relief that flooded me when the doctor told me that Casey was going to be fine was like the biggest weight being lifted from my shoulders. I had been allowed in to see her briefly, but she needed plenty of rest. I asked Cooper to stop off at the club on the way home, knowing that that was where I would find Alex.

It was eerily quiet as I stepped into the club. Cleaners went about their work, mopping up spilt drinks and the smell of sweaty bodies that had filled the room only a couple of hours ago. I headed with purpose to Alex’s office. I didn’t knock before I entered to find him sitting at his desk, sipping whiskey and working at his laptop.

“I wondered when you would show up to give me a pep talk,” he slurred without lifting his eyes to me.

“Do you have any idea where I have been for the past six hours?” I asked angrily.

His eyes lifted to me slowly before he sat back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest.

“Enlighten me; where have you been?” he said.

“I have just spent the past six hours sitting in a waiting room while doctors did everything they could to stop my best friend from dying from a booze and pills overdose,” I said as angry tears stung my eyes.

Alex shot out of his chair. “What!”

“She tried to kill herself, Alex. Because of you!” I yelled. “Because you were too much of a bastard to commit to the woman who loves you and who you love because you are so stuck in the past that you would rather you both suffer than face your fears.”

“Is she going to be okay?” he said, frantically reaching for his jacket from the back of his chair.

“She’s lucky,” I replied quietly. “The doctor said that I found her in time.”

“I need to be with her,” Alex said, grabbing his keys and heading for the door.

“You need to do the right thing, Alex; stop living in the past and do what’s right for now.”

Alex turned to me and nodded once; a silent understanding passed between us. Only a couple of weeks ago, he had stood in front of me and practically told me the same thing.

“Thank you,” he said before walking out and heading to the hospital.

It took us four hours and thirty-five minutes to film my final episode of
Perfect Alibi
. The audience was again amazing, as was Marcus. He thanked me on stage for being a great co-star, and the audience cheered along. It made me feel amazing but also emotional.

I had enjoyed my two weeks there; despite how challenging it had been on the outside, this had been my favourite job in my entire career. It was a shame that it had been tarred with so much stress outside of the studio. But I was beginning to see that this was what my life was meant to be like. There were always going to be challenges and upsets; I was just going to have to learn to deal with them head-on, as that was always the better way. Running solved nothing. I was learning that now.

“You joining us for dinner this evening?” Marcus asked as we stepped off stage and headed down the corridor towards our dressing rooms.

“Absolutely,” I replied.

“Great. I’ll come knock for you in twenty minutes.” He smiled, bumping his shoulder into mine before disappearing into his dressing room.

Yes, I was really going to miss this. It had been the perfect escape for me while Blake was away, despite that someone had tried to kill me. I smiled to myself as I thought about the saying “You could write a book about it”; that’s how crazy my life had been over the past two weeks.

I opened the door to my dressing room and stepped inside. My heart pounded hard and my body shook at the sight that awaited me.

“Hello, beautiful.”

I gasped in surprise. Every ounce of fear and dread and hurt that had been building up inside me for the past eleven days evaporated like vapour into the air.

“Blake,” I said with relief. “Oh my God!” Happy tears burst the dams. Closing the distance between us, I took two quick steps and jumped into his open arms, wrapping my legs tightly around his waist.

Immediately the warmth from his body gripped me as his arms folded tightly around my waist. He was here, in front of me, and I was as close in his arms as I could possibly manage, but I needed to get closer.

“When did you? … how did you? …” My fingers grazed the short stubble of his chin as I took in the sight of him. “I can’t believe you’re here,” I said in disbelief. “Am I dreaming, or are you really here?” I laughed.

“I’m really here, beautiful. We finished earlier than expected, and I wanted to surprise you,” he said with a gleam in his smile. “You were fantastic out there, really. Wow.”

My mouth claimed his. God I had missed him, more than I could ever have imagined. There was so much he didn’t know that I would need to talk to him about, but right now I would enjoy the fact that he was here, in my dressing room, holding me in his arms, in my safe place.

“You have no idea how happy I am right now,” I said as I pulled away briefly. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Blake said as he squeezed my backside, pulling me closer to him.

A sharp knock at the door distracted us both. My body slid out of Blake’s hold. We were both panting hard. I took a moment to steady my breathing, resting my head against Blake’s chest.

“Don’t move,” I said quietly.

Blake smiled. “I’m never going anywhere again, beautiful. Not without you.”

I walked over to the door, feeling slightly nervous. The last thing I wanted now was to find Cooper standing on the other side of the door, waiting to look after me as he had been doing since Blake had been away.

“Ready to go?” Marcus asked.

“I think I’m going to take a rain check, I’m afraid.” I opened the door wider and nodded to Blake.

“Hey, you’re back,” Marcus said, stepping around me and heading to Blake. “How was Miami?”

He nodded. “It was good, but I couldn’t wait to get back.” Blake’s eyes burnt into me with hunger. Sensing our anticipation to be with each other, Marcus excused himself after making plans with Blake and me for dinner the following week.

“Please tell me you moved all of your things into my apartment while I was away,” Blake said as I closed the door behind Marcus.

“About that,” I said carefully as I walked back to where Blake stood. “I’ve been really busy with Casey and Alex and work, and—”

Blake’s mouth was on mine instantly, silencing me. “You’re not backing out, I hope,” he said against my mouth.

“Not a chance,” I panted. “I only have a few things left to move. Take me home, and I will get the rest of my things tomorrow; but for now I want to go home and spend the next twenty-four hours making up for lost time.”

“Don’t you have a bridesmaid fitting early tomorrow?”

A small groan escaped my lips. “Okay, I want to spend the next twelve hours making up for lost time, and then forever after that.”

“Forever, huh?”

I nodded. “Forever.”

I was back in the safeness that I had become so accustomed to before Blake had gone to work in Miami. He sang happily in the kitchen as I lay in bed waking from a fairly sleepless night, but one that I hadn’t minded whatsoever.

Having Blake home had eased all of my concern; I had no need to worry about anything now that Blake was back by my side.

I realized, however, that I wasn’t as strong as I had hoped I could be alone, but that no longer mattered, not now Blake was back to protect me. I realized that at some point that day, there was so much that I needed to tell him. I wasn’t sure how he was going to take the news that I had spent so much time with Cooper against his wishes, but I was sure that as soon as he knew that Cooper had saved my life, he would understand and be as grateful to him as I was.

Blake came strolling into the bedroom wearing only a pair of pyjama bottoms and carrying a tray full of food.

“Good morning, my beautiful,” he said, placing the tray on the bedside table before kissing me briefly. “I hope you’re hungry.”

“Only for you,” I said, wrapping my hand around his neck and pulling him to me. He kissed me again before pulling back. “We have all the time in the world for that,” he said with a chuckle, “but this morning isn’t that time.”

I pouted, crossing my arms over my chest.

“And stop pouting,” he said, tugging my lip with his teeth. “Casey and Alex will be here in thirty minutes; Alex and I have been given instructions,” Blake said, wide-eyed in horror. “He’s all hands-on now with this wedding, you know.” Blake brushed the hair from my face with his fingers. “And from what I’ve heard, that’s all thanks to you,” he said, kissing me again. I grinned widely, knowing that somehow, through all of the shit that had happened that week, I had managed to achieve some good.

“Now eat and get dressed,” he said, climbing off the bed and heading to the bathroom. The truth was that I felt starving, but today was my dress fitting and I was hoping that I had shed the excess weight I had gained as a result of Blake and his persistence to make me eat. I took a couple of bites from one of the pastries to keep me going while I got myself ready for the day ahead.

“How?” I asked in frustration. “How the hell are my measurements the same when I’ve barely eaten and have exercised as much as I have?” Casey’s giggling only made me more frustrated. “It’s not funny,” I moaned.

“Come on, Jo, so you gained a little weight. You can’t even tell; you don’t have an ounce of fat on you,” she said, wrapping her arm around me as we walked from the boutique and headed for the florist to check last-minute details.

While Casey chatted with the florist, I stepped outside to listen to the voicemail that Cooper had left on my mobile a couple of hours before: “Hey, Jo. I hear that Blake got back last night. I hope he’s okay with my being your bodyguard while he’s been away.” I heard the amusement in his voice. “I just wanted to let you know that everything with Sara still checks out. She is still very much in rehab and receiving all of the help that she needs. I hope that eases your mind somewhat. Although I imagine it’s still confusing as to who would ever try to hurt you.” His voice grew quiet towards the end, as though his mind were elsewhere. “Anyway, I hope I can see you soon. Maybe. Let me know.”

I decided to return Cooper’s call to thank him for everything he had done for me. His phone went straight to voicemail, so I left him a message.

“Hi, Cooper, it’s me, Jo.” I rolled my eyes at myself; of course he would know it was me. “I just wanted to thank you for everything that you have done for me while Blake has been away. I’m glad we were able to get back the friendship that we had before … Well, before everything. You have been amazing to me, Cooper, thank you. And as for Sara still being where she is, thank you for looking into that for me. It’s still a mystery who wanted to hurt me, but now Blake is back, I have a feeling I’m going to be okay.” I smiled. “Oh, and just one more thing, Cooper. Thank you for saving my life. I’ll see you soon.”

Blake was talking on his phone when I walked into the apartment. I dropped my keys and handbag on the dining table before taking a bottle of water from the fridge. I watched as Blake approached me after finishing the call. He looked confused, hurt even.

“That was Marcus,” he said, tossing his phone onto the table before leaning back against the counter, crossing his arms against his chest. “Anything you want to tell me?” he asked calmly.

“What about?” I asked nervously.

“Oh, I don’t know.” He shrugged. “The car being vandalized, your dressing room being trashed …Cooper?”

“What did Marcus say?” I asked shakily.

“That doesn’t matter. It’s what you have to say that I’m more interested in hearing.”

“I was going to tell you everything once you got back, Blake, I swear.”

“I got back last night, Jo, and yet you haven’t told me anything.”

“I was so happy to see you last night; you have no idea just how much.” I stepped over to Blake and placed my hands on his chest. His arms stayed crossed. “I didn’t want to spoil that. I swear I was going to tell you everything today.” My voice became panicked. I was beginning to regret not telling him anything.

“Has someone been trying to hurt you while I haven’t been here?”

“Yes,” I replied simply. “It seems that way.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me? I told you I wanted to protect you. I arranged for someone to look after you while I was gone. But you said no, Jo.
You
said
no
,” he said as he shrugged me from him and began pacing the kitchen. “I should never have listened to you, never. Do you know how I feel now because I listened to you? Because I chose to do what you wanted rather than what you needed? I shouldn’t have listened to you. I should have gone behind your back, just like you have been doing to me for the past two weeks.”

“It wasn’t like that,” I said quietly.

“Then tell me, Jo. What was it like, huh? What made you turn to Cooper and not me? What made you want to hide everything from me like I mean nothing? Cooper tried to rape you, for God’s sake, and you turn to him when someone is trying to hurt you!”

“I wanted for once to stand on my own two feet, Blake. That is why I didn’t tell you. I am sick and tired of having someone watching over me, looking after me like I can’t look after myself. I am sick of it!”

“So you turned to Cooper?”

“No. I didn’t, I swear. He was just there, Blake; he just happened to be there,” I stated.

“What a coincidence,” Blake snapped.

“He saved my life, Blake!”

“What!”

“He saved my life!” I tried to remain calm, although I felt as though my insides were slowly crumbling. “I didn’t ask him to, but he did. He pushed me from the road when a car that had been following me for the past two weeks tried to run me down. The only reason I didn’t tell you anything was because I knew you couldn’t do anything from Miami. What could you have possibly done to help me?”

“I should have been the one who saved your life, not him.”

“But you weren’t here! You should be grateful to him, for Christ’s sake; if it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be standing here now arguing with you!”

“Wow,” Blake said, shaking his head in disbelief, “He really has gotten to you, hasn’t he?”

“What?”

“Why can’t you see him for what he really is, Jo?”

“He saved my life,” I said again.

“Only a couple of weeks ago, he almost had your death on his hands, Jo,” he spat out. “So forgive me if I don’t see what there is to thank him for in all of this.”

“I can’t believe you are behaving like this,” I said quietly.

“And you would behave differently, would you? If it were, say … Christina?” He shrugged.

“That is different and you know it,” I choked out.

“Is it? You have been lying to me for almost two weeks about something that I should have known about. And then keeping the fact that you have been spending time with Cooper from me just makes this a whole lot worse,” he spat back. “Do you know what your problem is, Jo?” I lifted my eyes to meet his gaze. “You forgive too easily. People hurt you, and you forget about it when they begin to show you one ounce of goodness. You only ever see the good in people.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” I choked out.

“Not always, no,” He shook his head slowly. “But that is why you always end up getting hurt.”

Blake’s words cut into me like a knife. I got that he was angry, but he was actually standing there telling me that everything that happened to me was always my fault.

“Maybe I was too forgiving with you too, then,” I replied.

Suddenly I realized that I had been right all along. How could I ever be happy? True happiness definitely didn’t exist. Whatever had made me actually believe that there was such a thing as happiness without pain had always just been a figment of my imagination, because from the view of the world that I had right now, happiness definitely only existed in fairy tales. I loved Blake more than I ever knew was even possible, but was that enough? Was love strong enough to get us through all of the shit that was constantly being thrown at us? I took a deep breath and prepared to do the only thing I was only ever capable of doing successfully. Picking up my handbag, I headed for the door.

“What are you doing?” Blake asked in a panic.

With my hand on the door handle, I took a deep breath and turned back to face Blake.

“I’m running.” I swallowed. “I’m running, Blake, and this time I am not coming back.” I opened the door and ran for the lift, refusing to look back, refusing to allow myself to stay. Blake called out to me, but I ran as fast as my legs could take me. As the lift closed, I saw Blake turn the corner.

“Jo, please don’t do this! I’m sorry!” his eyes caught mine as the doors closed and the lift began to make its descent. Falling to the floor, I sobbed uncontrollably. I had been foolish enough to believe I could be happy, and this just confirmed that was never going to be possible, so I did the only thing that I had ever been good at and ran.

I climbed into the car and started the engine. My visibility was poor from the amount of tears that were streaming down my face, but I needed to get away. Away from Blake, away from everything that had just destroyed the tiniest bit of happiness that I had allowed myself to regain.

I sped out onto the busy streets of New York with no idea of where I was heading or what I would do next, but I needed to get as far away from Blake as possible. The sky clouded over, and rain began to fall, clouding my visibility even more. The car echoed as my phone began to ring. The screen told me that it was Blake calling, but I would not answer. I would not let him talk me into turning the car around and going. We were done.

I had no idea where I was or where I was heading, but I knew that the more I drove, the further from the heartache I was getting, so keeping my foot firmly to the ground, I drove as fast as I could and as far away as possible.

Blake was persistent, however; every time the phone would ring off, he would redial. “Stop calling me,” I repeated over and over to myself. My tears were now full-on sobs. Using my arm to clear my eyes was doing nothing to help my visibility. The car jolted forward suddenly; looking into my rear-view mirror, I spotted the black SUV on my tail. “Shit, no!” I cried as panic struck. I was being followed. I didn’t know for how long, but I did know that it was the same car that for the past two weeks had followed practically every move that I had made. The same car that had tried to knock me down and kill me was following me now. My body began to shake; my eyes flickered from the road ahead to the car behind. Trying to shake them off, I took corners without warning, only for them to do the same. This was it. This was how I was going to succumb to them; this time they would catch up with me, and this would be how I would die.

I felt the car shudder again. Checking my mirror, I saw they were on my tail, bumping me over and over, trying to run me from the road. With each bump I would scream out. Fear filled my body. I had no idea how I was going to get out of this, but for now I needed to keep going, keep trying, keep hoping. I tried desperately to see who was driving the car, who wanted me hurt so badly. But my tears, mixed with the rain that was now lashing down, made the visibility almost impossible.

My phone rang again, and this time I answered. As much as Blake had hurt me with his accusations, I needed him right now. Regardless of any words that had been said in anger, I needed him to help me. He was the only person that I wanted; the only person that I had ever needed in my life. I needed Blake. This time, running had been the biggest mistake I could have made.

“Blake,” I cried out.

“Jo, thank God, please come home, please. I’m sorry; I’m so sorry. We can work this out, can’t we? Can we please work this out?”

“Blake!” I shouted through the sobs. “I’m being followed. It’s the same car again. It’s a black SUV. They’re going to kill me, Blake, and I’m so scared, I’m so scared!” I sobbed just as the car bumped me again, causing me to scream out. “They’re trying to run me off the road, Blake! Help me, please, help me!”

“Where are you,” he said firmly. “Tell me where you are!”

“I don’t know,” I replied, looking around frantically, “I just kept on driving. Blake, please, they’re going to kill me!”