Becca (23 page)

“Yes.”

“Every day? No, don’t
answer. I know you probably haven’t been praying for me. Please start, however.
I think I need prayers.”

“I’ll do that.” Bert said.
“Now tell me what’s wrong.”

“I have cancer, you
idiot. Did you forget?” Then her mouth sought his and she kissed him severely. Bert
felt her tears as they left her eyes and dampened his cheeks. She broke off the
kiss and placed her head against his chest. “The tumor didn’t shrink,” she said.
“It grew.”

“Why didn’t you
tell
me?”

“You’ve got enough to
worry about.” She used the front of his shirt to wipe her eyes.

“So…what’s next?”

“I’m starting another
round of chemo in a couple of days—a larger dose I guess, just to see if the
cancer responds. If it doesn’t, he’s cutting it out. I think I’m going to lose
my leg.”

“I’m sorry.” Bert kissed
the top of her head, relishing the scent and feel of her hair.

“Ah, you don’t care. Legs
are legs, right? And don’t waste a kiss there,” she said and then covered his
mouth with hers again. “Well,” she said when their lips parted. “I got you into
the back seat of my car and you felt me up, so I guess it wasn’t a total waste.”
Her finger poked his chest. “And I know for
certain
it’s
not
a
roll of quarters.” In spite of shivering and the melancholy sound of her voice,
she giggled.

“It’s bigger than a roll
of Lifesavers,” Bert said.

She made an exaggerated
shrug. “I didn’t say that. I said it wasn’t a roll of quarters.” She burst out
laughing, which brought tears to her eyes. “Do you mind if we go now?”

“Not at all.”

With difficulty, they regained the front
seat and Bert drove Becca to his house. They made themselves comfortable on the
couch, but Becca fell fast asleep with her head on his lap and her body curled
up into a little ball. Bert soon fell asleep also. Carol thought about waking
them up, but she saw how wonderful they looked together, so she left them and
went to bed.

III

The
phone woke him up.

Bert
looked at his watch. It was nearly four AM. Becca stirred and sat up, her face
a mask in incomprehension. Bert eased off the couch, Becca taking the
opportunity to stretch full length now.

“Where
is she?” it was Bill’s voice on the phone the second Bert answered.

“She’s
here.”

“I’m
coming to get her.”

“No
you’re not. I’ll bring her to you.”

“Let
me talk to her.”

Bert
sighed heavily and nudged Becca. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. “It’s your
father.”

“My
father? What time is it?”

“Just
after four.”

She
took the phone. “What? No.
No! 
I’m okay. I fell asleep. I’ll come home
now.
No!
Now. Don’t worry. His mother’s here, you want to talk to her?
Bye!”
She hung up quickly, yawned, and stretched. “I guess I’d better go.” She
stood up with Bert’s help.

“Are
you going to be okay?”

“Yeah.
I don’t have far to go.”

“No, I
mean when you get home.”

“Don’t
worry, he won’t touch me.”

“If
he does—”

She
hugged him. “He won’t. I enjoyed sleeping with you.”

“So
did I.”

“Maybe
some time we can
really
sleep with each other.”

“Hmmm,
that conjures a picture.”

She
planted a wet kiss on his cheek. “It was supposed to.” Then her fingertips
touched the spot. “Good night, Josh. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

He
walked her toward the car, letting her lean on him for support. “Are you sure I
can’t give you a ride home?”

“And
how would you get home?”

“I’ll
drop you off and my mom could follow me back over to your place tomorrow in her
car and I’ll drop yours off.”

“Would
you mind?”

“Not
at all. You go back into the house and I’ll warm up the car.”

She
handed him the keys and went back inside. He scraped the windshield and back
window as the engine ran with the heater on full. Finished, he went back inside
and brought Becca out to the car, his arm around her and holding her close. She
shivered the entire distance to the car.

“Thank you, Josh,” Becca
said as Bert pulled away from the curb.

“Not
a problem, Becca.” He felt her hand on his and took it. Hers was cold and dry
and he was afraid to squeeze it. “Where am I going?”

“Oh,
that’s right, you don’t know where I live, do you.”

“Not
at all.”

“Okay.
Well, just follow my directions, soldier, and we’ll make it through this
together.”

Becca
turned on the radio and she yawned and sat as close to Bert as the gear shifter
allowed. Bert realized how much he was going to miss her. He felt very alone
then.

Becca
lived in a sub-division of new homes. Hers was set back from the street by a
short walk. Lights were on and they saw a curtain move in one of the front
windows.

She
sighed heavily and yawned. “Thanks, Josh.”

“I
can go with you. I can explain.”

“Nope,
that’s okay. He wouldn’t listen to you anyway.”

The
front door opened. Her father came out and stood on the porch.

“Let
me help you.”

“No,
I’m okay. Really.”

Bert
got out, went around, and opened Becca’s door and helped her out of the car. He
said, “I should walk with you.”

“I’m
okay. Besides, he’s
waiting
to say something to you.”

“So
let him.”

“Josh,
please. I’m not afraid. He won’t touch me.”

“But
he
has
touched you.”

“Yes. But no more.
Trust
me.” She hugged him and shivered. “I’ll call you tomorrow and tell you what
time to bring my car around.”

“Yes ma’am.”

She smiled, kissed her
finger, and touched his lips with it.

He felt the moistness of
her kiss and smiled.

“Good night, Josh. Now
get in the car and go.”

Bert climbed back into the car and watched
Becca limp toward the front door. Her father stood rigid, not watching her, but
rather watching Bert. The man’s mouth moved—no doubt giving Becca a hard time
and Bert fought the temptation to get out and confront the man, but Becca
turned and waved her fingers at him as if nothing was wrong. She walked up onto
the porch, her father pointing his pipe at her as she walked past him. The man
then turned and started down the walk toward the car, and Bert decided it was
time to go.

IV

“Come pick me up.”

Bert drove out to Becca’s
house and saw her standing on the porch waiting for him. She made her way down
the walk to the car. He jumped out, opened the door for her, and helped her
inside.

“So…I survived,” Becca
said and kissed his cheek.

“I’m glad to hear that.”

“You’re taking me to
lunch, then a movie, and then we’re going to hang around your house for the
rest of the day—maybe you can even take me to dinner.”

“Wow, I’m glad I didn’t
have other plans.”

“So am I. Tomorrow,
you’re taking me to the hospital. It’s time for me take more poison into my
body to keep me alive.”

For the day, they both forgot their
uncertain futures. Although they planned on going to a fancy restaurant for
dinner, they stayed at Bert’s house and Carol prepared a meal. Becca had to be
in the hospital early the next morning, so their evening ended early.

VI

Josh answered the phone.

“Josh, Merry Christmas.”

“Hi Becca, and Merry Christmas
to you.”

“This has been my
Christmas Day: opened gifts—such as they were—listened to my mother and father
argue about should I take off to come see you, which it didn’t matter anyway
because I’m still pretty much screwed up and I’d only embarrass myself if I
came over to your place right now. It’s what, 8 PM and I’m ready for bed and
that’s after sleeping away the afternoon. I hate this chemo therapy stuff, but
you know it beats the alternative.” She paused. “And let’s see…oh, yes, Greg
came by and he says he’s looking forward to seeing me New Years Eve, and then I
realized my parents were going out for New Years and probably asked him to come
over to babysit me. What a life, huh?
And
I realized that I screwed up
and didn’t get you a present or a card.”

“Shit, Becca, I forgot
also. Sorry.”

“Forget it, Josh. So how
was your day?”

Bert chuckled. “Maybe a
tad more exciting than yours. My mom’s been on the phone most of the day with
my stepbrothers and grandkids. I’ve watched some TV…read some.”

“You sound bored.”

“Very perceptive young
lady.”

She yawned. “As much as I
want to see you…I can’t. Not tonight. Let’s meet tomorrow for lunch.”

“Where?”

“Your house, have some
sandwiches ready. Noon. Got it?”

“Got it.”

“Josh…gotta go. I’m falling asleep here.
Holy cow am I tired. Merry Christmas again.”

VII

Josh watched Becca pick
at her food. She was pale and thin, but she was in high spirits in spite of her
condition. They lingered over lunch, engaging in small talk and in the comforting
silence that comes when two people enjoy being with each other.

“So,” Becca said through
a yawn. “Who’s up for a nap?”

“That would be you I
suppose,” Josh said.

“Yup.” Becca stood up and
clutched the chair for support as a wave of nausea passed.
Don’t be sick,
Becca,
she told herself. When Josh offered her his hand, she took it.
“Where’s your room?”

“My room?”

“Jesus Christ, Josh. Your
bedroom. It has a bed. I need to lie down for a while.”

They mounted the stairs
slowly and in Josh’s room, Becca kicked off her shoes and climbed onto his bed.
“Oh my God, Josh. I am so
sorry,
but I can’t stay awake.”

“I understand.”

“Mmm, comfy,” said and
pulled the comforter over her. “Come on, Josh…lie down with me.”

Bert slipped out of his
shoes and crawled under the comforter with her. She had her back to him and
reached behind her to grab his leg and draw it over her. “Get closer,” she
said. “Hold me while I nap.”

Bert felt her body
tremble as he lay against her. His arm went over her and shook his hand.

“Don’t move,” Becca said
and was soon asleep.

Bert actually dozed and
awakened when Carol came home from work. He eased out of the bed and went
downstairs.

“Becca’s here,” he said.
“She’s napping in my bed.”

“Is she okay?”

“I hope so, Mom.”

In the early evening,
Becca awakened and came downstairs to greet Carol, to Bert she said, “You
moved.”

He smiled. “Sorry about
that.”

“Carol, I’d really like
stay, but I have to get home. I’ve got to go into chemo again tomorrow
and…well…I’m so damn tired—
still—
that if I stay here any longer I might
have to stay the night.” She smiled. “And I want you to know that your son,
Bertram here, was a perfect gentleman. You have nothing to be concerned with.”
She tugged at Josh’s arm and he bent over so she could kiss him.

Bert walked her to her
car. “I’ll call you tomorrow,” he said.

“No, Josh, let me call you. I don’t know
what time I’ll be like after the treatment.”

VIII

“Sorry, Josh. Not feeling
up to anything today.”

“That’s alright, Becca.”

“What are you doing for
New Years?”

“I had nothing planned.”

“Really? No friends to go
to…no parties?”

“Nope.”

“Just you and your mom?”

“Actually, she’s going to
a friend’s house. She wanted me to come along, but I didn’t feel like it.”

“Want some company?”

“I thought Greg was
coming by to babysit you.”

“He’s coming by, but I’ve
got other plans. So, you want me to come over and celebrate the New Year with
you or what?”

“I suppose if you want
to.”

“Wow, Josh…make me feel
wanted. I’ll be there by nine, okay?”

“I’ll be here.”

IX

“Becca,” Greg said when
he bid good night to her parents as they left the house. “I’m really sorry
about this.”

“Don’t be. I appreciate
you wanting to come over to spend New Year’s Eve with me. I’m sure you’d rather
be somewhere else.”