Before the Fall (7 page)

“We have little time. Your father is at the inn,” her mother said, taking a step back. Looking around, she leaned in and whispered, “He is with one of them—an angel.”

“Mother, you promised not to ever mention the word.” Her mother was the only person she had told about Raphael’s true origins.

“This is not the first one. There have been others. It is said that some have had carnal relations with women in the city and as far as Jericho. Some even say that they are here to rule over us and are trying to breed a new race. What does Raphael know about this?”

“Nothing. He has not said a word to me.”

Her mother looked at her skeptically. “He was one of the first to arrive here . . . and to have a son.”

She stiffened. “Raphael loves me.”

“Are you sure, daughter? Dathan speaks with their leader, Lucifer.”

“Lucifer?” Her heart pounded in her ears. He was still in the city.

“Yes. He fears others will come and that Lucifer will build an army that no human army can defeat.”

She thought of the hushed whispers between Raphael and Lucifer behind closed doors and how Lucifer had been visiting more frequently as of late.

“I see the look on your face, Rebecca. You see what I see.”

“Raphael is different.”

“Even Baka sees it. I have heard that the child Jael carries was placed there by one of
them
. Baka seeks to join their army and is willing to raise sons for them.”

“Poor Jael,” she gasped.

“Raphael is one of them. It is not too late for you. Your son does not know who he is. Take Jeremiel and flee this place before Raphael turns against you.”

Raphael’s handsome face flashed through her mind. She thought of his soft touch as he brushed his thick hand against her cheek, the soft expression on his face as he gazed into her eyes lovingly, the warm glow she felt when he held her in his strong arms. She couldn’t even fathom the thought that he would ever hurt her.

“I don’t believe it. Not Raphael. He has always treated me with love and respect. He has nothing to do with the others. You must believe me.” She had always trusted in her mother, and it would kill her to think that her own mother thought Raphael was like the others.

“Are you sure, daughter?” Her mother gazed deeply into her eyes.

“Yes. I am.”

Her mother sighed heavily. “I cannot imagine you loving someone that could be cruel, and Raphael has made you happy. You glow within every time I see you. I have a mother’s heart and I worry for you, that is all.” She smiled.

“I understand. I am a mother too.”

Her mother patted her cheek, then she handed her some thick material. “Here, take this. I made it for Jeremiel.”

Rebecca took hold of a red blanket, her fingers tracing over the intricate designs. By the look of it, it must have taken months to make. For all of her mother’s warnings, she knew her mother loved her and Jeremiel. “Oh, it is lovely. I wish you would come to see him. He is growing so fast. Mother?”

Her mother’s eyes were wide as she stared in the direction of where the inn was located.

“We could use a man like you on the council, Lucifer.”

Rebecca froze. Coming out of the inn were Lucifer and Baka, with her father close behind.

Shaking her father’s hand, Lucifer said, “I will take that under consideration, Dathan.”

“Being in the governor’s good graces has many benefits,” Baka said. “Come to my place for supper and I can tell you about—”

Baka’s eyes met hers and she gasped.

Seeing Baka’s frown, her father followed his gaze and looked directly at her mother and to her. His nostrils flared at the sight of her.

“Lucifer. Baka. We will continue our conversation tomorrow,” her father said. “Sarah. Come. Now.”

Rebecca blinked back tears as she watched her mother give her one last look before scurrying away with her father into the inn.

Her hands shook as she reached down for her water jar. She didn’t care if she had to come back later when the well was more crowded. She needed to leave.

“Allow me, my dear Rebecca.”

She shivered at the way Lucifer said her name. He smiled down at her.

Standing behind him, Baka’s eyes traveled her body, and again she felt as if were stripping away her clothes. She hunched her shoulders protectively and shifted away from him when he approached her. He walked behind her and she felt his hot breath on her neck.

“This one is not worthy of your time,” he said. “Not even her own father can bear the sight of her.”

“I beg to disagree. My friend seems to be quite fond of her.” Empty grey eyes focused on her, and she shivered when his lips curled slowly into a smile.

Turning his attention to Baka, he gazed deeply into his eyes and in a low, melodic voice he said, “You will forget this encounter. Leave us.”

Rebecca blinked in surprise at the expression on Baka’s face. It changed from deep anger to blankness. The last time she had seen it was when Raphael convinced him to instruct his army not to attack the outcasts and to assist in moving them to another location.

Baka bowed his head.  “Of course.”

“Well now, it appears Baka still hasn’t gotten over Raphael stealing you from him.” He handed the water jar to her when Baka was gone. “Why don’t I fill this with water for you?”

“No, thank you. I can manage.”

When she took hold of the jar, Lucifer placed his hand over hers and leaned in. Grey eyes gazed deeply into hers, and in the same tone he had used with Baka, he whispered, “Did Raphael and Jeremiel leave this morning?”

His breath lingered over her skin and she felt herself grow numb. Her mind felt like it was filling with dark smoke and the crowds of people around her disappeared. His face blurred in and out of her vision. Her head pounded, muffling the noises in the city. She could hardly think straight.

“Yes.” The voice that answered did not sound like her own.

“Are you alone?”

The question echoed through her mind. It was as if Lucifer’s voice was coming from within her.

“Yes.”

“Let me come with you,” the voice in her head whispered. “We can get to know each other . . . better.”

The mist grew thicker and she shook her head, trying to clear it. She could feel Lucifer getting closer to her, his heat emanating off of his body.

“Rebeccaaaa. Let me come with you,” he repeated. “You and I can be together.”

No!

She felt herself drowning. She felt compelled to answer him, to obey his wishes. Just when she was about to answer, she heard a man calling out to them.

“Lucifer, Rebecca. Where are Jeremiel and Raphael? I was hoping to run into them today.”

The mist began to lift and she could see Uriel approaching them.

Lucifer gripped her arm and whispered. “You will forget this.”

“I meant to come by last week but I got held up in Jericho by a lovely young woman.” He winked and elbowed Lucifer.

“Uriel,” he greeted, his voice sounding irritated.

“Rebecca? What’s wrong?” Uriel asked.

Rebecca shook her head, but the fog in her mind still hung heavy. “I-I-I must go. I am not feeling well.”

“Was it something I said?” Uriel’s voice was the last thing she heard as she pushed through the crowd.

Blindly, she ran through the city gates. With each step she took, her mind became clearer. When she finally reached home, she shut the door and sank to the ground with her back against it, gasping for air. She tried to remember what had happened. All she could remember was feeling cold and Lucifer telling Baka to leave. She felt unclean, and she didn’t know why.

***

W
hen her breathing was back to normal, Rebecca decided to do some weaving. She climbed up the stone steps to the second floor of the house and into a small room. She loved the sunlight that filled the room in the mornings, which was why she’d had Raphael set up her loom there rather than on the bottom floor.

She reached for the bone spatula to use for a patterned weaving and sat on the wooden stool. As her fingers moved across the loom, a lone tear slid down her face as she thought about the expression on her father’s face. It was like she was a stranger to him. Maybe it would have been better if she were a stranger. Then his loathing wouldn’t hurt so much.

She wished things could be different. That Jeremiel could get to know his grandparents better. That her mother didn’t have to sneak away to the well just to see her. Rebecca knew that her mother longed to see Jeremiel, but that she was fearful of the backlash from her husband if she dared to sneak away to visit them. Not that her father would hurt her mother, but his shunning was worse than a whip.

Her thoughts shifted as she thought of Jeremiel. He was growing up so fast. As he grew older, he wanted to go out more. It wasn’t fair to him to keep him away from other children. She could take Jeremiel with her on her daily trips into the city. Raphael had encouraged her to do so. But she was so fearful of what her father or Baka would do to him if they found out he was half angel that she kept him away. Raphael had his angelic powers and would thwart anyone who threatened to harm his son. She had no doubt about it. But to do so would give away his presence and she didn’t know what the implications would be for him. She knew he had only meant to stay here for a short time and she didn’t want to do anything that would make him have to leave.

She was selfish. She wanted Raphael to stay with her. She wanted him all to herself. Deep in her heart, she knew Raphael’s gifts could help others. She had seen that when she first met him and he had defended the outcasts, the sick and the weak. He was a true angel of healing.

She loved him. She couldn’t help herself. And when Jeremiel was born, her heart grew even more. Raphael and Jeremiel were her family, her life, and she would do anything to keep them.

Time passed quickly as she weaved. She focused on Jeremiel and how excited he was to go fishing with his father. It was his first outing away from the house. She knew Raphael would watch over him.

There was a loud bang, and she stopped, her hand in midair. The front door opened and closed. She held her breath. It couldn’t be Raphael. It was too early. She didn’t expect him back until later in the evening.

“Rebecca.”

“Raphael?”

There was something wrong with his voice. Something must have happened.

She jumped up from her seat, knocking it over, and flew down the stairs. 

“What is it? Is it Jeremiel?”

Raphael stood alone in the center of the room. His lips curled into a smile. It was the same smile she’d seen hundreds of times. Every time she saw it, her heart would flutter at the sight of it—except now.

His beautiful face glowed as he reached out to her. To her surprise, her stomach clenched at the sight of his thick, muscular hand. Instinctually, she took a step back.

Raphael’s blue eyes grew dark, but in a blink the darkness was gone, replaced with the kind eyes that she was used to seeing.

“You are worried.” He took another step forward. She fought the urge to run away from him.

“Where’s Jeremiel?”

“We were on our way back and we ran into Sarah. She was on her way to visit him.”

“My mother?” She blinked, confused. “That’s strange. She would have told me when I saw her this morning.”

His nostrils flared. It was so quick, she wondered if she had imagined it. Something was wrong with her. She was seeing things that weren’t even there. Maybe the heat was getting to her.

“She had meant to tell you when she gave you the blanket,” his voice was smooth, almost melodic. She felt an unnatural calm spread through her. “She mentioned Dathan’s interference.”

“Yes, he...” the image of her father’s face resurfaced, bringing up heartache again. “He was with Baka and Lucifer at the inn. He saw us at the well. She left with him and we didn’t have time to talk.”

She thought about telling him about her mother’s warning to her about the angels. Something inside of her told her to keep it to herself.

“I see.” He reached out to her and took hold of her arm, pulling her to him. It was cold.

“Jeremiel is safe with her. You have nothing to worry about.” He pressed her to him, and she felt him grow hard against her.

“Raphael? What are you doing?”

He dipped his head, inhaling the scent of her hair. “What do you think? I am requesting the services of your wifely duties.”

Cold lips pressed on the top of her head. She shivered.

“Now?”

She fought the urge to pull away from him. This was her husband—the love her life. So why was she feeling this way?

His muscles hardened against her chest. His arm tensed and felt like a steal rod wrapped around her, so tightly it began to hurt. Something was wrong with Raphael. Never in all her time with him had he ever hurt her. The only time she had ever seen a hint of anger, it had been directed at Baka. He was always so sensitive to her every need.

“Yes. Now.” His voice was gruff. He was pulling her toward their bedroom. Her face grew hot as she fought back tears.

She didn’t know what to say. It was her duty to provide the needs of her husband. Was this why he was back early? To have his lust fulfilled?

“Raphael, what is wrong?”

“There is nothing wrong with a husband wanting his wife. Is there?”

Before she could speak, he yanked at the collar of her tunic, ripping its delicate material, exposing her bare breasts. Instinctually, she gathered the torn pieces together and covered her chest.

Raphael’s eyes grew dark and narrowed into thin slits. “Are you denying me my rights?”

She blinked back tears.” N-n-no. It’s just that . . . I am not ready.”

His nostrils flared, then he quickly smoothed his face. His eyes grew empty, creating goose bumps on her flesh.

“I will be gentle,” his voice was melodic.

Cold hands gently pried her fingers from torn remnants of her dress. With eyes locked with hers, he lifted her hands to his lips and kissed them. “Is this more to your liking?”

This wasn’t the same Raphael. His touch, the mere look of his eyes on her, always made her feel special, loved. But this. This man was not her dear Raphael. Each touch of his cold hands—the way he looked at her—made her sick to her stomach.