Read Between a Vamp and a Hard Place Online
Authors: Jessica Sims
He had a point. “So you were set up? Is that what you are saying?”
“Perhaps. I knew the women I tupped. They were good, sweet girls with not much between their ears. Certainly not enough to plot a warlord's downfall. They must have been bribed to entice me into their bed.”
My eyes widened. “I thought it was just a blonde with big thighs. Now it's more than one? Exactly how many wenches were you bedding at once?”
“Last night? Four.”
I sputtered again. “Four?”
“They approached me and offered their services.” He gave me another one of those purely masculine grins. “Who am I to refuse the ministrations of four women at once?”
“Gee, and you didn't stop to question this at all?”
“I am a warlord with much wealth at hand, and I have been told I am not unpleasant to the eye. It was not the first time several women offered their services to me. Why should I think anything strange of it?”
“Why indeed,” I said dryly. “Next time you get offered a free gang bang, maybe you should think twice about why they're willing.”
“Wise words,” he agreed. “And now, because I do not know who sought my death, I am alone and unarmed in this strange place and time.” For a moment, he looked so sad and lost that my heart gave another unhappy squeeze. “To think that mere hours ago, I was laughing with my soldiers and planning the next day's ride. Now I am here in this strange place, my men are long gone, and I am awash with enemies all around.”
“Oh, come on,” I muttered. “Not everyone's an enemy.”
“Do you mean to tell me that you are not mine?” he said, a small, sad smile on his mouth. “That you would not press that stake back into my breast if you could?”
He had a point. I didn't trust myself to say no, so I said nothing at all.
He nodded at my silence. “You cannot be happy at my appearance here. Indeed, I am not happy with it myself. Until I know more about this place and time, I am afraid you will have to lead me.”
“Wait, lead you where?” I had a sneaking suspicion I wouldn't like the answer. “No one said anything about helping you.”
Rand moved forward, leaning closer to me. I was trapped between him and the cabinet, and I scrunched my body backward as he leaned in. “Let us get to the truth of the matter, Lindsey. You are angry that I suckled at your neck.”
Jeez, when he said it like that, it sounded positively dirty. I clamped my thighs together, hating that parts of me were reacting. I was still outraged, damn it. “Wouldn't anyone be mad about that?”
“Actually, no,” he said in a low, soft voice. “I have naught for complaints in the past. Women have requested that I bite them during bedsport. I am told it is exceedingly pleasurable.”
The way he said that made me want to squirm.
He regarded me with blue-eyed intensity. “So, you tell me that if I asked permission to use your neck and suckle you, you would respond differently to me? That you would be sweet and willing in my arms instead of fighting something that is clearly pleasurable?”
“You're so incredibly arrogant,” I whispered, shocked.
“I am,” he agreed. “I am used to getting my way. I am a leader of men. I do not ask permission, ever. But if you say I must, I must.” He leaned in so close that I could smell his strange, spicy scent. It felt as if he was going to kiss me. Instead, though, he simply leaned in and his lips moved close to mine. “If I ask nicely, Lindsey, may I suckle you?”
A hot bolt of unwanted lust shot through my body. “No,” I protested, but my voice sounded weak, even to my own ears.
“No?” That sexy, arrogant little smile touched his mouth again. “You tell me no, but the rest of your body is responding to my nearness. Vampires have heightened senses.”
I moaned in embarrassment. So he could smell my arousal? “You jerk. You don't bring that up to a girl,” I hissed at him. “And no still means no.”
“But I need you,” he murmured, that wonderful, beautiful mouth inches from my own. From this angle, he looked like a beautiful, pale man. No fangs were visible. His skin wasn't touching mine, so I couldn't feel how cold he was. Just a pretty man telling me he needed me.
And for a moment, I felt weak. Uncertain. “Need me?”
“To help me navigate this strange time and place.” His blue eyes captured mine. “Last I slept, it was six hundred years ago. I know nothing of this place, the people, or its customs.”
“I'm not sure I'd be the best guide,” I told him. “I'm a stranger here, too.”
He looked surprised. “Is this not your home, then?”
“It's not. Gemâuh, a friend and I are cleaning it out for a sale. The owner passed away.” I didn't want to tell him Gemma's name. If he'd gone exploring, he'd seen her upstairs, but still. Confessing her name felt suspiciously like betrayal, and that I wouldn't do. “My actual home is a very, very far distance away from this place. Across the ocean.”
He gave me another one of those smug smiles and wagged a finger at me. “Lindsey, Lindsey. I am not a peasant. I am a learned man. Even I know that the world is flat.”
“You caught me,” I agreed, amused. Let him figure it out the hard way. “Regardless, I don't live near here.”
Rand accepted that with a nod and pushed away from the counterâand me. He began to pace, hands clasped behind his back. “Then who are the owners of this place? How did my sleeping place come to be in their possession? Why did they not wake me?”
I drummed my fingers on my chin, thinking. I certainly wasn't going to think about how the room seemed less pleasant and exciting now that he wasn't in danger of kissing me anymore. Nope. “The people that lived here before were old and wealthy and collected a lot of stuff. That's why there are so many boxes. But I don't know if they were the ones that bought your coffin. I don't even know if they knew you existed.” Quickly, I told him about finding the secret room full of antique treasures from different centuries. “It's possible that a collector from an earlier time purchased your coffin and hid it, and no one's known about you for years. There's no way of us knowing without going through receiptsâ”
“Receipts?” He touched the side of his nose. “Another wordâ”
Right, he didn't understand. “Papers that record the sale amount and date,” I told him. “I found some of them for the jars, but nothing in your coffin. It doesn't mean that there wasn't something. It just means I haven't found it yet.”
“Well,” he said agreeably, “you purchased the temporary rights to this place, did you not? And with that, you purchased the rights to all belongings here?”
“That's right,” I agreed.
“And did you not find my coffin below?”
I was starting to get a sinking feeling about where this argument was heading. “I did.”
His brows went up. “Then would it not stand to reason that you are now my caretaker? Are you not responsible for me?” He pressed his hands to his heart dramatically. “Am I not as a babe in this time and place?”
I snorted. “Rand, you are many things, but helpless, you are not.”
“I am certainly glad you think so,” the man said, and his voice was practically purring. Gah. It was like he thought I'd complimented him. Double gah. “Regardless, I need you.”
“Fine. What is it you want to do?”
The playful look on his face disappeared, all flirtiness erased. “When I was staked, I was in the city of Rome, visiting an old friend. Another one of the Dragon's men. If I am yet living after all this time, it reasons that he is as well.”
My eyes widened. “Another vampire? Really?”
“All of us whom the Dragon has claimed are
upyri
. Vampire, as you say in your language. Blood drinkers. Strong. Dangerous. Hunters of men and women. Feasters upon flesh.” He gave me another up and down look, as if assessing my flesh. “We are cursed men, though one would argue that it is not always unpleasant.”
Yep, he was definitely staring at my boobs. Just when I felt a little sympathy for the guy, he knocked it away again, like we were in some sort of sexual ping-pong match.
“Okay,” I said quietly. “I help you find another vampire, and then you're out of my hair, right? No more of this wench crap?”
He gave a nod. “I shall avail myself of a new wench. You have my word.” His smile widened. “Though I doubt she will taste as perfect as you.”
I rolled my eyes. “I'm sure there are lots of people that taste just like me.”
“You'd be surprised. Your flavor is a rather unique one.” His eyes were hooded, the look in them sultry. Was he . . . was he trying to seduce me into volunteering to be his personal blood bank?
I was insulted. “I don't care if I taste like chocolate pudding. If I'm helping you, you don't get to drink from me whenever you like.” I waved one of my cookies in the air. “It's clear I'm not good at donating.”
“Very well. Then you agree to help me?”
I sighed, thinking of the basement full of treasures that had to be carefully packed, cataloged, photographed, insured, and shipped back home. I wouldn't be able to do that with a vampire hanging around, asking what made the toilet flush. I needed to get rid of Rand. Dropping him off with the nearest vampire sounded like a good idea to me. “How are we going to know where to find a vampire?”
He touched his temple. “It rests in here.”
“Like the languages?”
“A little different.” Rand touched his breast. “My blood is connected to that of the Dragon. Through him, I have knowledge of your language. It is also through him that I am connected to others. I feel the hum of vampire blood somewhere else nearby. It is faint, but it is here.” He rubbed his forehead. “Very faint. I do not know if it is because so much time has passed that my bond has grown weak, or if it's because there are so many other things interfering now. The hum you mentionedâ”
“Electricity,” I offered.
He nodded. “That, and the scents and sounds of so many other people.” For a moment, his eyes looked hollow, tired. “It is so much crowding into my head at once.”
“Then we should get you to your vampire friend sooner rather than later, shouldn't we?”
“Indeed. Swear you will not abandon me again?”
Fair enough. It wasn't like I was going to be able to get away. If his senses were so keen that he could smell another vampire, I had no shot of escape. “I swear it.”
“Ah, but you are quick to swear. You also swore upon your lord that you would not run, and yet the moment I turned my back, you fled. Your word is not to be trusted.”
I licked my lips and hopped down off the counter, brushing off my jeans. How did this get turned around to me being the untrustworthy jerk? You swore one oath on Elvis Presley and people sure got all gripey. “All right then, smarty pants, how did people make oaths in your time?”
He grinned, showing me fangs. “Why, an oath of blood, of course.”
“Ix-nay on the blood,” I said quickly, taking a step backward. “First of all, I lost too much already. Second, if we share blood, won't that turn me into a vampire?”
“True. You could always swear fealty to me the way a vassal swears fealty to his lord.”
“How's that?”
“A kiss.”
“I'm starting to think this is all an excuse to make out with me,” I grumbled, but I stepped forward anyhow. “So you made out with all your vassals? Tongue included?”
He flashed another smile at me. “No tongue. Just a chaste kiss of fealty on my foot.”
“Your foot?” I sputtered. “I'm not kissing your foot!”
“I will allow you to kiss my mouth, then.”
Sneaky vampire. But it beat foot-kissing. “I'm not sure I signed on for any of this.”
“Then how can I possibly trust you?”
Damn vampire. “Fine. Let's get to it, then.” I moved into his arms and tilted my head back.
To my surprise, his arms went around me, one sliding to my waist, the other cupping the back of my neck. If this had been any other man, I'd have thought this was a prelude to an intense make-out session. But this was a vampire. I watched him warily as he leaned in and his lips lightly brushed against mine.
Soft. Sensual. Brief.
Cold.
I shivered.
“Now swear your fealty to me,” Rand murmured, and his thumb skimmed over my lower lip thoughtfully.
“I swear I won't abandon you again,” I told him.
“Then you are mineâand I am yours.”
That sounded so very . . . final.
U
pstairs in the bedroom, Gemma was snoring away. I hated to wake her up, but since my world had been upended in the last hour, she needed to know things. We were a team.
I convinced Rand to stay outside the bedroom for a few minutes, trying to assure him that no, I wasn't running away again, and truly, I wasn't trying to betray him. I was just going to break things to Gemma . . . gently. Well, as gently as
Hey we have a vampire
could go. So I tiptoed into the room, sat on the edge of the bed, and nudged her. “Gemma. Wake up.”
She came awake with a snort, peered around the room, and groaned, flopping back on the bed. “What time is it?”
I looked at the clock on the wall. “Um, three a.m.”
“God, I fucking hate you. Why are you waking me up at this hour?” Gemma whined, pulling a pillow over her face. “Someone better have died.”
Oh, the irony. “So I have good news and bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?”
She peered at me from under the pillow. “Uh-oh. Bad news?”
“The coffin wasn't empty.”
Gemma gave an earsplitting shriek.
I clapped my hands over her mouth even as Rand slammed into the room, the heavy wooden door banging against the opposite wall. His eyes were wild, his longish hair flying. At the sight of him, all menacing in the doorway, Gemma's shriek died. Then she looked at me, wide-eyed. “That's him?”