Beyond Complicated (20 page)

"Yes," I whispered, my gaze locked with his.

We stood toe to toe, just far enough apart to explore each other. We didn't kiss, hands roaming. My jacket came off, I'd forgotten I was wearing it. The buttons on my shirt seemed to open of their own free wil. I puled his sweater over his head letting my fingers run up his bely until he sucked in air with great gasping breaths. "I want you."

At first, I wasn't sure if I'd said the words. I thought them. He didn't react so maybe I hadn't gotten the words past my tongue. "How do you want me?"

It was his standard question, from the porn days. What we would do, if there was a third, where he would be. He never bottomed for anyone but me. He was mine. Mine exclusively. I was the slut. I'd fuck anything. I kept him pure and he did what I told him.

My baby. He wasn't a baby anymore. He was al grown up, a good-looking man and I'd do whatever he wanted. "How do you want me?" I countered. "You lead, I'm yours."

He smiled a lopsided smile, catching his bottom lip in his teeth. His eyes sparkled. "Over the island." He tugged at my belt as he walked me back to the island. I liked this Seth, I wanted this Seth, I wanted to be dominated and—his hand cupped me through my briefs and I forgot to breathe. "I want inside you, I want to hear your cries of pleasure. I want to hold you when you come. I want you to feel safe with me again."

"I want that." I touched his lips finaly, tasting him. He opened for me, kissing me gently before he turned me to face the counter and leaned me over.

The granite was cold beneath my cheek. I held my body off the surface, back arched as he lowered my pants to my knees. He ran his hands over my ass, stroking me. His hot tongue folowed. I gasped when he spread me and licked me there. He'd never wanted to.

Rimming bothered him. His tongue entered me and I damned near nutted then and there. "Oh, shit, Seth."

"Do you want me to stop?" He sounded worried.

I reached back and ran my fingers through his hair. "No, baby, felt so damned good I nearly came.

Startled me, that's al."

"That's good. I love when you do that to me.

Never told you." He sounded so shy. The big scary lawyer, more like big sweet teddy bear. My big sweet teddy bear.

"Don't stop." I carded my hand through his hair, guiding him back to business. His tongue, Jesus, his tongue was so damned hot inside me I had to fight to stay standing. Then his fingers were inside me, gliding in the spit while he leaned past me to the lazy Susan beside his cooktop. Olive oil would make for one kinky as hel lubricant. He dried his hand on a towel. He took a moment to fumble with the buttons on his jeans and then he was inside me. Pushing slowly into me and I pushed back, loving how he felt. "I love when you fuck me. God, I love feeling your cock in me. How you fil me up. So slow and—oh God, Seth, you're so hot."

His hands settled on my shoulders as he found his rhythm, holding me, puling me to him, pressing me flat, he slammed into me and I loved it. He didn't break stride when his door buzzed. I was so damned close, I wrapped my hand around my dick, pumping. The door buzzed again. "They'l go away. I'm close, Liam, can I come?"

"Yeah, oh, please, come—" And that's how he found us. His startled blue eyes filed with pain and rage as he stood in the door, key in hand, soaked to the skin. Seth went soft. Guilt flooded me. It was me he pinned with those incredible eyes. Me who'd betrayed him in every sense of the word. He didn't say a word he just turned and left, leaving the door wide open behind him. "Shit. Go catch him. Before he does something stupid."

Seth closed his jeans and with a nod, he was out the door before I was upright. I stood at the refrigerator, pants al buttoned, shirt stil open, trying to pretend I wasn't about to fal apart. How in the hel did this happen? How did we get to this point? Seth puled him inside; he sure as hel couldn't come quietly, could he? "Let me go, damn it. Go bury yourself in—"

Kel stopped when he saw me. Anger flashed in his eyes. Bitter pain too. Everything he felt stabbed me in the chest with just a flash of his eyes. "You're soaked to the skin."

"It's slightly pouring outside," Kel replied in that caustic bitter overgrown kid way he used against his parents.

"Oh, Kely, I'm so sorry." Seth stood beside him, his head hung in shame.

"Save it, I got your texts this afternoon, I couldn't cal you to see what you wanted. I stopped on my way… I have no idea where I was going. I stopped to—it doesn't matter." Kel swiped his hands through his wet mass of hair.

Were those the messages Kel ignored at Moira's house, I wondered briefly. Seth's gaze met mine, guilt emanating from him. I cocked an eyebrow in question. Funny how we fel back into the old patterns as if we never parted. We'd learned early how to communicate without words. A look, a gesture, a lewd swish of the hips, whatever we had to do while filming.

It ran over into our day-to-day life. Eyes meet across a crowded room and I knew everything before either of us looked away.

"I wanted to talk to him, try to explain, I didn't want to hurt him, Liam. I thought I'd meet him for lunch and tel him we were working on getting back together."

Seth shifted uneasily beside Kel, both looking at me with different emotions in their eyes.

"I'd say you managed that quite nicely. Bals deep inside him. Jesus Christ, I thought I could handle this. I thought it wouldn't matter. God damn, fucking…

fuckers."

"He has an interesting vocabulary," I said, watching Kel bristle with anger and betrayal and bitter hurt and I knew it was my fault. My fault for letting him get too close, for encouraging him. For wanting him.

Both of them. I wanted them both. Kel and Seth. I wanted both of them so badly I couldn't breathe. "I wonder if you kiss him, wil he shut up?"

What the fucking hel was I saying? Seth's startled gaze told me he thought the same, Kel didn't seem to hear me, he turned to leave but Seth caught his arm, holding him. He continued to look at me, his eyes asking permission. I nodded. I couldn't have Kel but Seth could and I had Seth. Somehow, that worked out fine in my head. Kel stopped talking the second Seth's mouth slashed against his. He stood rooted to the spot, his hands caught somewhere between reaching for Seth and flailing in panic. "How does he taste?"

"Angry," Seth said, coming up for air. "But sweet. He has the sweetest mouth. And he kisses, God, Liam, little punk knows how to use his mouth."

"For more than just screeching," I agreed as Seth smiled and leaned in for a second kiss. I looked in Seth's fridge for another beer and with a twist, I tossed the lid away. "Get that wet jacket off him. He's dripping al over the floor."

Seth moved quickly, tugging at the wet leather until it lay on the floor. Kel forgot his anger and when the jacket was gone, he wrapped his arms around Seth, running his fingers through his hair. I remembered those fingers in my hair and shivered. "No hands. Seth, remove his hands."

"Yes," Seth sighed the word, he remembered this scene. He took Kel's arms in his hands and slowly lowered them until he could hold his wrists behind his back. Kel's eyes flew open in alarm.

"Behave or I'l keep Seth for myself," I told him before he could say anything. "A gift."

"But only if I do as you say?" I could tel Kel was trying to decide the best course of action. He was out of his league now. I was in control, not him. He must have sensed that. "Kinky."

Seth laughed. "I love this kid. Want him, Liam."

"How do you want him, baby?" I took my beer and wandered into the living area and dropped into the bend of the huge leather sectional sofa that dominated Seth's apartment.

"Forever," he said, surprising me as wel as Kel.

Kel's eyes went round and he looked at me but I couldn't read him. I didn't know him wel enough. "Both of you. Forever. Don't make me choose because I can't. I thought I could. Ten minutes ago, I thought I could. I can't let him go now, Liam."

I didn't know what to say. The naked longing in Seth's eyes as he held Kel captive, his large muscled chest and arms wrapped around the slimmer man. He was mine. Mine and I… had no idea which one I wanted more. I couldn't have one, yet I knew how he tasted, I knew how he felt inside me and around me.

"Okay."

I surprised al of us. "Kel's decision." I added. I knew what he would choose. I just didn't know if I could deal with the consequences. "Can you share Seth with me?" I wanted to cal him baby so badly, but I bit my tongue. How in the hel was I going to keep my hands off him? Kel looked at me with something close to fear in his crystal blue eyes. I saw what looked suspiciously like tears shimmer there. He knew I was giving him Seth in place of myself.

"Yes. If that's what he wants," his voice trembled as he spoke. He closed his eyes, his Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped back whatever was choking him. "If it's okay with you, Liam."

"He is too fuckable to let go," I said trying for levity. I didn't know which one I meant or who I was talking to. I swalowed my own bitter regret and taking a sip of the beer, I sprawled on the sofa. "Seth, take his wet clothes off, baby, before he catches his death."

Seth groaned and went to work dragging Kel's T-shirt over his head, the cotton the only thing dry on his body. He ran it roughly over Kel's dripping hair before tossing the now soaked garment on top of the jacket. "Kel, boots, off."

Kel looked at me as if he'd never seen me before but he reached down and tugged until the beat up biker boots were laying beside the rest of his discarded clothes. He stood shorter than Seth without the boots. Seth didn't notice, he dropped to his knees and started work on his wet jeans. "His hands, baby, behind his back. Yeah, that's a good boy. Be good for Seth and I might let him taste your dick."

I'm not sure who groaned but Kel hastily clasped his hands behind his back, forcing his shoulders back, his chin high, exposing his neck. When Kel stood nude in front of Seth, his beautiful dick rigid his hands behind his back I had to bite my tongue to keep from reacting. "Warm him up, baby, he's shaking from the cold."

"What would you like for me to do to him?"

Seth played the game wel. My orders, he warmed up the third for me, taking him to the edge without ever realy doing anything to him.

"He's your pretty, baby, what do you want to do with him?" I trembled when Kel's eyes met mine. He studied me as Seth's big hands roamed his body, his mouth touched him in places, leaving kisses that made Kel shiver. "That's sweet, baby, he's enjoying that.

Aren't you, boy?"

I hadn't meant to use the word, he wasn't a boy, but he was, he was my boy, and now Seth's. Our boy. Kel seemed not to notice, but then he spoke, his words shocking me. "Yes, Sir."

Seth groaned out loud. I damned near did. Kel had never caled me sir a day in his life. Not in any sense of the word. "I like that, pretty boy, with the black leather colar around his neck. Maybe we'l get you a leash and keep you as our pet. How about that, baby, we need a boy on a leash, don't we?"

"God, Liam, keep talking like that and I'l bust a nut." Seth was finished playing, he wanted to get down to business now. Kel stood silently, hands behind his back, his eyes on me. I couldn't read him.

"Touch him, Kel, no leashes, just you and Seth, I want to watch him love you, baby, I want to watch as he swalows your pretty cock. Touch him, tel him how it feels." Seth didn't wait for Kel to say a word, he took his sweet cock in his hands and with one quick gulp he swalowed him whole.

"Shit, fuck, my god," Kel swore as he reached for Seth's shoulders to keep from faling over. Aha, Seth had never used that trick on him. What else had the new upstanding Mr Vincent kept from the young stud he'd seduced?

"I taught him how to suck dick, how to suck my dick. God, that's beautiful, suck him deep, Seth, baby, take him down your throat." Kel's eyes roled into the back of his head, he made smal loud gulping noises in his throat, gasping moans that couldn't clear his lips.

"No coming. I'l tel you when you can come."

"Can't fight it, can't, Liam, oh, my, god, too much. Can't." Kel whined piteously, his hands clawing at Seth's shoulders as he fought orgasm.

"If you come, I'l take my gift away and use him myself," I wondered where the sadistic streak came from. I'd never realy cared much for domination games.

Not real domination, just a bit of control and command with Seth. I smiled, yes, I had to admit the smile felt sadistic, when Kel shivered but he controled his response. "Slower, baby, our boy won't last long at that rate."

"I think you're right." I heard Seth laugh, the sound echoed my words. Seth always was a quick study. "We could, just this once, put him out of his misery."

I watched a bit more as Seth suckled and played with Kel. The boy naked on his feet before my half-dressed lover, trembling with the ebb and flow of need. He made pretty noises deep in his throat, very little in the way of comprehensible words. "Why don't you bring him to the sofa? That floor looks hard on the knees." I offered, wanting them closer so I could stroke and touch and share Seth with Kel.

Seth climbed to his feet, skimming his hands along Kel's legs, making him quiver, his mouth did a reverse track back to his neck. And then before either of us could anticipate, Seth lifted Kel off the floor. Kel didn't flail or cry out, he simply accepted and wrapped his legs around Seth's waist. His long cock pressed between their bodies, sliding between them as Seth walked.