Big is Beautiful (14 page)

"I'm glad you liked it." What a stupid thing to say?

His dimples deepened. "I did. Did you?"

Well yeah! "It was okay."

"Maybe next time I'll do better."

H-o-l-y…!

"Maybe…"

He closed my book; this time I didn't try to stop him. I wasn't entirely sure I could at this point. "Brittany, I need to ask you a question."

I was listening and reminding myself to breathe. It was all right for me to have a teen breakdown moment. Matt Taylor had
just kissed me
!

"Um… I told Kendra I would go to the Red Ball with her, but to be honest, she's just a b… um… she's not pleasant to be around. Truthfully, she gets on my nerves. The only reason I'm going with her is because I told her I would when we were dating. I'd rather eat glass than spend that much time with her."

"I can tell you really love her." I hoped this was going where I wanted it to go.

"Love isn't the exact word I'd use. Actually, I'd rather…. Go with you."

Was I really hearing this? "What's the catch?"

"There's no catch."

"Of course there's a catch."

"Why?"

"Why?" I know I said it like it was the craziest idea ever… Because it was! "Because people like you don't ask people like me out anywhere."

"Again I say,
why
?"

Was he really that dense? "I mean… look at you. You are…
you
."

"And you're you."

"And therein lies the problem."

"You can't think that little of yourself."

Oh, I really could. "It's not just me. It's the way of the world. Especially the high school world. I'm not as popular as you are. We don't date."

"Is that in the high school handbook?"

"It's older than time." I laughed sadly.

Matt looked me dead in the eyes and reached for my hand. "Don't. Don't even go there. I don't think like that. I like you. I think you're pretty cool. I'd like to go to the Ball with you. Forget everything else about the
way of the world.
Will you go with me… please?"

Yes… yes… yes…

"I'd… uh. What about Kendra?"

He shrugged. "You let me worry about her. You just be ready at six."

"I don't have a ticket," I reminded him.

"You can have Kendra's."

"Oh, no, that's all right. I don't want to make her hate me more than she already does."

"I'll take care of Kendra. You still haven't answered me, and time is almost up."

"A timed offer?"

He pointed to the clock hanging high on the wall. "Time. Tutoring ends in five minutes."

"And what have I learned today?"

"I don't know about you, but I've learned you've got some pretty kissable lips."

Swoon…

Did guys even talk like that in the twenty-first century? I guess they did because I wasn't imagining the words coming out of his mouth.

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes. I would be honored to go to the Ball with you."

The way his face lit up, you'd think I offered him a million dollars.

"Great! I won't see you tomorrow after school because we don't have tutoring on Friday nights, but I'll be at your house to pick you up at six on Saturday. Okay?"

"Fine… yeah, that's great."

"Good."

I looked at him. He looked at me. We both had goofy grins, though I figured my goofy grin was bigger than his goofy one. I looked up at the clock. Four on the dot. My mom would be outside. As much as I loved talking to Matt, I needed to talk to her more.

"I'd better be going," I said, putting my books in my bag, not sure if I should look at him or not. I'm sure most people would. "My mom's probably here."

Matt stood when I did, blocking my way to the door. "Thank you."

"For what?" I honestly didn't know. I should be the one thanking him for wanting to even spend time with a girl like me.

"For saying you'd go with me."

"You're welcome… well…" I moved toward him and, thankfully he moved so I could get by. "I'd better go. Thanks for the tutoring… and the kiss and all."

"Anytime."

That sounded pretty good to me.

I got past him and broke into a run when I figured I was home free. I didn't stop until I made it to the car, swung open the door and threw myself inside. "Mama!" I yelled, out of breath.

She must have thought something was horribly wrong. "What is it? Are you hurt?"

"I have a date...." My brain wouldn't function. "What do I do now?"

Chapter Twelve

The next day was Friday, and I was on cloud nine. The birds sang me awake and the sun beamed through my window like a warm golden ribbon.

Okay, none of that really happened. It was raining when I woke up, and I hadn't heard a bird chirping all winter. Being February, that was pretty typical.

But birds singing and sunbeams dancing was how I felt when I rose from my bed and put my feet on the hardwood floor. I didn't care about the temperature or the clouds. Tomorrow, I was going on my first date!

The first thing I did was go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and step on the scale. Three pounds lighter since Tuesday. I was hoping for more, but at least it was three pounds less and not three pounds extra.

I'd go all day without eating again even if my stomach was aching and my legs were starting to hurt from the lack of important nutrients. And I'd get a dress with a corset in the back to suck me in some more at the dance. I could do this. I wouldn't be skinny, but I could be presentable in time for the dance.

I took extra time to get ready, going through my closet at least three times to find something decent to wear. It wasn't even like I'd see Matt. We didn't have any of the same classes, and there wouldn't be any tutoring since it was Friday. I could go all day without catching a glimpse of his gorgeous tussled hair.

But there was still a chance…

I picked out a deep plum colored, long-sleeved shirt with some black swirls and a few sparkles near the collar. My jeans took forever to get right, being as I didn't want ones that accentuated my belly or a pair that made my butt look saggy. A fine medium was what I wanted, and I finally found it in a pair of dark-wash bootcuts.

I threw my hair up in a clip and studied it in the mirror.

Maybe it was time for a change.

My hair fell around my shoulders when I let it go. I curled the ends then loosened them. Feeling a little naked, I put a small braid down the front of my hair and fastened it behind my ear.

I put on a little darker shade of lipstick than I normally did and stared into the mirror.

Wow.

I looked like a doofus who was trying too hard.

Frustrated, I wiped the lipstick off and put on my usual shade, but I kept the hair.

My mom had breakfast ready for me, but I just had time to grab a piece of toast (which I didn't intend on eating, but she didn't know that), kiss her on the forehead, and run out of the door to catch the bus. No time for chit chat.

"Hey wait! We still on for dress shopping after school?" she yelled when I was halfway out the door.

"Yeah. Jillian and her mom will pick us up at four if that's okay?"

"Works for me. I talked to your dad. He's excited about the dance and said to tell you we didn't have a dress budget."

My attention was thoroughly piqued. I turned on a dime. "Really? He said that?"

She nodded. "Talked to him this morning. He told me to have a good talk with the boy, but he's happy for you."

Talk with the boy
didn't sound fun, but the thought of my dad being happy for me made me grin. And the thought of an unlimited dress budget made me ecstatic because we always lived on such a strict budget. I felt like Cinderella going to the ball. "See you then."

I started to leave, but my mom yelled at me again. "I fixed your coat."

My feet stopped before my body, and I did a lurchy thing that wasn't coordinated at all. "You what?"

"Your white coat. I know how much you loved it, so I fixed the hole and had it cleaned so you could wear it." She looked so happy. I felt so miserable. I didn't want to look like a giant marshmallow again.

My mom reached into the seat next to her and, sure enough, pulled out my coat, bright and perfect like the day we'd bought it. Only then, I'd liked the thing. Now I just wanted to toss it. It was like a boil I couldn't get rid of.

Thanks,
Mom.

"Here ya go, sweetie," she said as she ran it to me.

I took the coat and looked it over. It really was pretty, no matter what Kendra said. Why did I let what Kendra said dictate what I liked and what I didn't like?

Not anymore.

"Thanks." I smiled as I took it and kissed my mom on the cheek before getting on the bus. It was going to be a wonderful day.

If only I could get a ticket to the Red Ball…

My heart was in my throat the entire ride to school. Would I see Matt? Probably not. I didn't usually see him unless it was at lunch. Would I see Kendra? I could count on it. Would people know little — or Big as the case was — ole me had a date to the Red Ball with Matt? Most of all, would things be any different?

A lot of "woulds" going through my brain… so much I thought I'd go crazy.

By the time my brain felt like it was going to explode, we pulled into school. I got off the bus after everyone else as per my normal, walked into the school like normal, and felt self-conscious, like normal.

I got to my locker, praying I didn't see Kendra. Matt said he'd get her ticket, but I knew she'd make me pay for stealing her guy. As quickly as I could, I bent down and got my stuff out of my locker. My dead poet project was due so I made sure I had everything in the folder. My ears were on hyper-alert, but I didn't hear Kendra or her posse anywhere in the hallway.

Thankful, I zipped up my bag and headed to English. Today was looking up.

That thought lasted all of two minutes. When I turned down the hall to get to English, Kendra and her girls were walking up it.

Freaked me out.

"Big!" Kendra smiled the biggest fake smile I'd ever seen. If I had my guess, I'd say the space station could see its magnificence. She had her hair down around her shoulders like I did; only hers made her look like a supermodel. "I'm glad I ran into you."

Like it had been a big coincidence…

"Still need a ticket for the Red Ball?"

Holy cow! She didn't know. Matt hadn't talked to her yet about giving her ticket to me! "Um… no, I'm good."

She didn't look surprised. Her expression didn't scream, "I'm going to kill you!" either. So I was all confused. She was way too calm. "Matt called me last night and told me he wanted to go with you."

"He did?" Wow, I'd had it all wrong.

"You didn't know?"

I felt a stutter coming on and tried everything I could to stop it. "He… uh… he asked me yesterday."

"I think it's sweet."

Of all the ways I dreamed this would go, I never expected her to say that. "Really?" was my awesome response.

"Yeah, I mean, it's nice that he wants to help the less fortunate."

B-u-r-n. There was the Kendra I knew and loved. "I'm not…" I was going to say
less fortunate
, but she butted in.

"And that's okay because I had already been asked by Rodney but had to turn him down because of my commitment to Matt."

"Rodney? You're going with him?"

Her brow raised. "Problem?"

"No. No. I'm glad." Peas in a pod.

"Yeah, well, you did me a favor by going with Matt since we've broken up and all. I was only going with him to be nice."

When I thought of nice, I automatically thought of Kendra Moses… not.

Kendra kept on talking. "You do know since you're going with Matt now you'll be a shoe in for Red Queen?"

"I haven't thought about it." Too much anyway. It seemed too far-fetched to ever actually happen.

She scoffed and put her hand on her hip. "You'd better because you don't want to look like even more of an idiot than you are in front of the entire school when Red Queen is announced and you're standing there with a thrift store dress."

That made me mad. My mom said I didn't have a price limit on the dress. We were going to Bella's Boutique, not a thrift store — not that there was anything wrong with that.

But…

Kendra did have a point. Going with Matt did come with certain perks I hadn't thought about before, one being the chance to become Red Queen. I felt sick to my stomach at the thought. There was no way I'd ever get it, was there? "I don't think it'll be me. I'm sure you will win."

She shrugged. "I'm Homecoming Queen and will be Prom Queen," she sounded pretty sure of herself. "Red Queen isn't that big of a deal."

How very mature of her.

"Anyway," Kendra went on. "I just wanted to let you know no hard feelings. Okay? You've actually helped me out, and I wanted to give you this." She pulled something out of her pocket. A piece of red paper, long and rectangular like a pamphlet. "Here's my ticket to the dance. The one I told Matt I'd give you."

I was skeptical. "You don't need it?"

"I have an extra."

I hesitated before I took it. What if she jerked it away and laughed at me for the rest of the school year and beyond… and what if it was real and she was truly over Matt, even though yesterday she said she wanted him back? They'd sure seemed lovey-dovey Tuesday afternoon after tutoring.

"Thank you," I said finally. I grabbed the paper and was relieved she didn't pull it away.

The coveted ticket to the Red Ball was grasped firmly in my little hand. Maybe Kendra wasn't so bad after all.

"See ya there!" Kendra grinned before turning her hips to the side. "I'm sure it'll be an unforgettable night."

Part of me thought I should dwell on the fact that Kendra Moses was being way too nice to me and said it would be an unforgettable evening, but a bigger part of me couldn't. With the most important piece of paper ever in my hot little hand, I was in. I was going to the ball!

No more worrying about how to get a ticket.

No more worries about Kendra.