Bitter Bonds (2 page)

“Good.” Ray’s head swiveled toward Nick who was pocketing his phone. “The kid doesn’t need to get anything so just keep him company. Once Dylan arrives for his shift, I can leave. I’ll take him over to Jake’s.”
Nick picked up another slice of pizza. “Whatcha gonna tell Jake?” he asked and bit off the cheesy gooey tip of the slice.
Ray laughed. “The truth.” Jake wouldn’t like it, not the part about the sub’s past nor the home truths Ray would lay on his friend, but it was time someone jerked Jake out of his self imposed depression.
“What did you say your name was, kid?” Nick reached for a napkin. “I didn’t catch it when I was on the phone and I can’t keep calling you ‘kid.’”
“Finn Decker,” the submissive replied in a voice so low Ray barely heard it.
Nick nodded and turned his attention back to the pizza. Ray moved away to serve other customers who sat down at the bar, but he could feel Finn watching him. By the time he returned, Nick was pushing the box away with a groan.
“Gonna have to put in some extra time at the gym for that. I’m not as young as I used to be. I can’t metabolize that stuff like I used to.” He grinned, his white teeth flashing in the dim light.
“You’re in good shape,” Finn said in a wary voice.
“I own a construction company. It can be a physically demanding job at times.” Nick rolled his eyes. “And my submissive keeps me busy on a lot of different physical levels.”
Nick launched into a stream of tales about his submissive, Micah. Ray knew it to be an tactic aimed at keeping Finn calm and it seemed to work. The submissive sat quietly, nodding at all the right parts of Nick’s story. Ray reached into the pizza box and pulled out a slice, eating it absently, his mind busy with what he’d say to Jake. His friend would be resistant, but Ray wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Jake would help Finn and in return, Finn would help Jake in more ways than he could ever imagine because Ray was pretty damn sure Jake would fall under the spell of the beautiful submissive whether he wanted to or not.
Ray grinned and wiped the bar with a towel. Being a good Samaritan had never felt so right. Two – Finn

Fairy tales had never been a favorite of Finn’s as a child. His mother read them and he suffered through it, never feeling sympathy for the main characters because of the fantastical premises of the stories. He’d always been a fairly grounded child, practical and logical. The only fanciful part of him was his music. He’d heard music inside his head for as far back as he could remember. The older he got and the more he understood the world, the more convinced he became that the music came from his soul. It was an integral part of him. You couldn’t kill the music inside him without killing him too.

So the only magical thing Finn had ever believed in was music. Even in the darkest moments of his life, the music had never left him. Even at his most lonely, his most lost, the music still welled within him. Sometimes that soothed him. Sometimes it irritated him because of the bittersweetness of it all. He could compose music seemingly out of thin air but he couldn’t figure out how to make enough money to put a roof over his head or food in his belly. Apparently, the only way he’d be able to make money for that was if he sold his body and there were no guarantees he could do that. After all, he’d sat in the bar at Darkness for hours and hadn’t been able to work up the courage to let any Dom approach him.

When the bartender spoke to him, his hunger fled to be replaced by fear. The auburn haired giant seemed nice enough though as did his blond haired friend who called for the pizza. Both Ray and Nick had been nice to him and Finn had been on the streets long enough to know that no Dominant was nice to a sub without an ulterior motive. At first, he’d thought that motive was sex, but the longer he’d sat on the bar stool the more he’d come to realize that their motive had to do with their friend Jake.

Now, Finn sat in Ray’s SUV hurtling through the night toward Jake’s place. He shivered a little and pulled his coat closer around him. He had no idea how this guy Jake would treat him. From what he’d overheard of Ray and Nick’s conversation, Jake lived alone and had been badly burned by submissives in the past. He had trust issues and was a loner. He sounded pretty scary to Finn but Ray assured him that Jake would not expect sex as repayment for cleaning his studio.

When the SUV stopped, Finn gazed out the window at an industrial area. The wood and steel building before them had clean modern lines, lots of expensive lighting highlighting the architecture and a discreet sign that read, “Wired For Sound.” Darkness filled the downstairs windows, but a light burned on the upper level.

Ray hopped out of the SUV and slowly, Finn opened his door and got out. Keeping his knees from knocking and his limbs from trembling seemed to be beyond the scope of his control over his body. Fear and apprehension were not new things to Finn. He’d lived with them daily from the moment he’d been forced to walk away from the life he’d always known and the protection of his family. He stared at the two story structure and tried to tame his fear. Job. Food. No sex unless it was mutually agreed upon. Ray had promised.

“C’mon. Despite the hour, I know Jake’s up,” the bartender said.

Finn followed Ray down the short sidewalk to the door. The strong scent of an evergreen winter blooming flower or plant wrapped itself around Finn. He breathed deeply and felt the scent calm him slightly. A man who had flowers and shrubs that bloomed year round couldn’t be all bad, could he?

Ray pushed a button beside the door. A crackle came from the speaker set in the wood beside the door.
“I know it’s you, you bastard. What do you want?” a man’s voice growled.
“Open the door, Jake. I’ve got something for you.”
Ray grinned at the speaker as if the man inside could see him. And maybe he could. Finn gazed around the door frame and the overhang they stood beneath. Cameras these days were ultra tiny. There could be one watching them and he’d never spot it.
Finn tried to concentrate on the scent of the flowers while they waited the two minutes it took for Jake to throw open the door. A shocked silence reigned. Out of the corner of his eye, Finn could see Ray grinning smugly. He had a right to that grin because Finn found himself staring at one of the most beautiful men he’d ever seen. Six feet of tanned muscle, a chiseled jaw with a neatly trimmed beard, thick wavy dark hair and piercing amber eyes. Faded jeans molded and caressed long muscular legs and a rusty colored T-shirt clung to broad shoulders and nicely formed pecs. Finn could only imagine that the abs were as defined as those shoulders. Long, elegant bare feet peeped from the bottom of the jeans. Everything Finn had ever fantasized about in a perfect man and then some.
And he was a Dominant.
Sucking in a harsh breath, Finn tried to calm his racing heart. Amber eyes raked him from head to toe, assessing and thoughtful. Then the man looked at Ray and emotion sparked in those gorgeous eyes.
“Being the Good Samaritan again, Ray?”
The voice had a gravelly quality that made Finn’s skin prickle with awareness. Deep and rich with just a little bit of rasp to it as if the man had been awakened from sleep. Finn fought back a shiver.
“I’m always a Good Samaritan.” Ray smirked at his friend.
One dark brow quirked up. “Is the recipient me or the boy?”
Innocence replaced the smirk. “The boy, of course. Jake meet Finn Decker. Finn, this is Jake Conrad. He owns this place.”
Finn extended his hand and found it enveloped in Jake’s bigger grasp. Bright, assessing eyes met his gaze. Curiosity flickered in the golden irises. Finn pulled his hand back slowly. The heat of the other man’s grasp had roused Finn’s wayward cock and even though Jake’s gaze never left his, Finn knew Jake had somehow sensed his arousal.
He suddenly wished he didn’t look half starved. He knew they all called him “boy” because he appeared so fragile and waiflike. Starvation did that to a guy. Even before his master had turned him out, the Dominant had kept Finn to a strict diet in order for him to have a slender, willowy appearance. Finn knew by the size of his bones that he should weigh much more than he did. And he could tell by the expression in Jake Conrad’s eyes that he knew Finn was half starved. Jake’s next words confirmed it.
“Come on in. Have you eaten?”
Jake stood back to let them in the building as Ray told him, “We had a pizza at the club.”
A light burned in the pale wood entryway of the building, emphasizing large artworks on the walls. Finn’s eyes widened in surprise as he noticed that they were anime art. He couldn’t think beyond his initial surprise though because Jake led the way up the stairs and Ray nudged him in the back, indicating he should follow. Finn heard Ray close the door at the bottom of the stairs, cutting the upper level off from the lower one.
Fear should have taken over at having his escape route cut off by the closed door and Ray, but despite his still wobbly knees and trembling body, Finn didn’t feel that sort of fear. He climbed the stairs behind Jake. A different kind of fear began to permeate every cell in his brain. He no longer feared he might be injured or killed by crazed Dominants. Now, he feared that whatever Jake Conrad might do to him, he would like.
The stairs opened into a large open floor plan room filled with wide uncovered glass windows, more of the beautiful pale wood and more anime art. Leather couches and chairs encircled a long coffee table in the same color wood with glass insets. A huge flat panel television filled one wall and off to one side was a dining table with six high backed chairs.
Jake walked toward the table and then turned left behind the open end of the wall. Finn figured that must be the kitchen area and had his guess confirmed when Jake’s voice floated toward them.
“Since you’re not hungry I’ll make some tea. Chamomile or lemongrass?”
Ray flopped down on a couch, obviously at home in Jake’s space. “You know better than to give me that chamomile crap,” he grumbled, waving a hand toward the cluster of leather furniture.
Finn took the gesture to mean that he should sit down. Jake returned before Finn had a chance to look more closely at the room. He set a tray on the coffee table and handed Finn a white mug. Ray helped himself to a mug.
Wrapping his fingers around the ceramic mug, Finn let the heat seep into his bones as he breathed in the scent of lemongrass. The herb soothed his raw nerves a little.
“Finn needs a place to stay and three squares. He’s willing to clean the studio and he knows musical instruments,” Ray told Jake bluntly.
Shock jerked Finn’s head up. He stared at the ginger haired bartender. “I never said that I knew musical instruments.” His banked fear returned in force. How the hell had the bartender known such a thing?
Ray made a face. “I saw you writing music on a napkin at the bar. No one who knows how to write music is inexperienced with musical instruments.”
Jake’s amber gaze locked with Finn’s. “You were writing music?”
A strange chill swept through Finn. He wanted to lie but knew he couldn’t. Men usually wanted to exploit him, but it had never been about his music, only his body. He kept his abilities to himself and his previous master had known nothing of them. In the space of a couple of hours, these two strangers had come close to discovering what might be his most dangerous secret. Quickly, he decided he couldn’t tell the whole truth, but would say enough to put them off the scent.
“I—I play a little piano,” he stammered, his gaze dropping from Jake’s to the cup of tea he held. “I had lessons when I was a kid.”
Ray grunted. “You’re still a kid.”
Finn rolled his eyes a little and Jake chuckled. “How old are you, Finn?”
“Almost twenty-four.” He kept his gaze on his tea mug.
“Has he met Micah and Haven yet?” Jake asked Ray, his tone wry.
“Only Nick, but it’s just a matter of time. Nick doesn’t keep secrets from Micah.” Ray sipped his tea and stretched out his legs. “So what do you say? Can Finn stay?”
Jake heaved a sigh. “Yes, of course. He needs somewhere safe to stay and I need help with the studio. You knew I wouldn’t turn my back on someone who needs help.”
Ray chugged down his tea and set the mug on the tray before rising to his feet. “I knew the two of you were a good fit the moment I saw him writing music.” Ray’s mouth quirked into a smile. “I’ve gotta go. You two don’t need me to facilitate the howdee-dos.”
A few steps from the stairs, Ray turned back toward them. “By the way, I promised Finn that any sex between you would be by mutual consent and not as payment for a meal and a bed.”
Finn gasped and Jake cursed. Ray strode down the stairs, his wicked laughter drifting back to them. The door at the bottom of the stairs opened and closed and then Finn heard the outer door open and close. Silence fell between him and his new employer. Finally, Jake got up and took the tea tray into the kitchen. When he returned, he stood at the end of one of the couches gazing down at Finn thoughtfully.
“You’re a submissive.”
The statement should have startled Finn but somehow it didn’t. He stared up at Jake, half afraid the Dominant would hit on him and half afraid he wouldn’t. “Yes.”
It took all of Finn’s control to stop himself from tacking on a “sir” after his “yes.” Jake nodded and rubbed a hand around the back of his neck, his brow creased in a frown. “I’m not looking to collar a submissive,” he stated baldly. “It’s never worked out for me in the past and I doubt it ever will.”
Finn cocked his head to one side and stared up at the Dominant. “Why not?”
A bark of laughter escaped Jake. “You’re the only person to ever ask that.” He gestured toward the clock on the wall that showed the time as nearly one in the morning. “That’s why I won’t ever collar a sub again. I work weird hours. I work too much. I don’t care for a sub under my protection the way I should. The first sub who accused me of that said I shouldn’t be allowed to be in a relationship. The second one just stripped my house of artwork, maxed out my credit cards and left me a note that said he knew more about my finances than he did about me and since I was so good at handing him a credit card to amuse himself with because I had to work, he figured I wouldn’t miss him or the money he spent.”
Finn bit back his gasp of shock. He shouldn’t have been surprised. He knew people like that existed in the world, but he felt sorry for Jake that he’d been taken advantage of in such a manner. He stared at Jake and saw the cynicism on his face. His sympathy led to a loosening of his guard as he instinctively sought to make Jake feel better.
“My parents kicked me out when they discovered I was gay. They and the rest of my family want nothing to do with me. It’s as if I never existed,” he whispered, his eyes on the tea mug. “I was away at college at the time. They cut off my tuition, turned off my cell phone, closed my bank account and had me evicted. I didn’t know what to do. If Mr. Reynolds hadn’t taken me home and collared me, I would have been on the streets.”
Jake leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. “Mr. Reynolds was your master?”
Finn nodded and his gaze dropped back to the mug. It was easier to talk about it all if he didn’t look at Jake. “Arlen Reynolds. He didn’t like me to call him anything but master, sir or Mr. Reynolds.” Finn swallowed hard and continued with his story. “I slept on a pallet on the floor of his bedroom. I wasn’t allowed on the furniture. I kept his home clean, cooked for him and his guests. He dressed me in nice leathers and took me to clubs.”
He plucked absently at the seam of his leather trousers remembering how his master had called them a uniform. “I had to submit to whatever he wished to do with me, whether I wanted to or not. I was not allowed to have limits or a safe word nor was I allowed to have friends or interests outside his home.”
Finn drew a shaky breath. Actually telling someone how he’d been treated for the last five years hadn’t turned out to be as tough as he’d thought it would be.
“On the days I did the grocery shopping, I would sneak into the music store and play one of the pianos for a few minutes.” He closed his eyes on remembered pain. “It was the only pleasure I received in all the years I served him.”
“What happened?”
Jake’s soft question held a note of sympathy and Finn had to fight back tears.
“I came home from grocery shopping one day and found a plastic trash bag filled with my clothes and personal items. Mr. Reynolds had collared a new submissive, one much younger than me.” Finn drew a shaky breath and finished his story. “He tossed me out. Wouldn’t even remove my collar. I had to do that myself. He gave me a little money and I made it last as long as I could. I tried to get a job, but I have no skills and no references. Employers want to know where I’ve been for the last five years and why I didn’t finish college. I couldn’t afford my room anymore and I couldn’t afford to eat. I went to Darkness to try to w-whore myself out but I couldn’t go through with it.” “And that’s when Ray and Nick stepped in.”
Jake knew his friends well, Finn thought. He nodded to let Jake know he’d been on the money with his guess.
Pushing himself away from the wall, Jake pointed down the hall past the stairs and toward the back of the house. “Let me show you where you’ll be staying.”
Finn set the tea mug down and followed Jake. The whole house was decorated in anime art which fascinated Finn. Jake didn’t seem like the kind of guy who’d like such whimsical art, but he seemed almost obsessed with it based on the number of pieces he had on his walls.
Jake pointed to a set of double doors at the end of the hallway. “That’s the master suite.” He turned slightly and pointed to a door not far from the stairs. “That’s my office.” He pointed to another door near the office. “That’s off limits.”
Mouth dry, Finn swallowed hard. He got the sense that whatever lay beyond the off limits door had everything to do with his host’s suddenly rigid posture and tense jawline.
“That’s your room.” Jake indicated a fourth door across from the office. “It faces the back of the building and overlooks the garden. My father planted the garden and this was his suite.”
Finn shot Jake a curious glance. “Is your father dead?”
Jake nodded, a hint of sadness in his expression. “He died several years ago of cancer. We had this room built for him when he was diagnosed and I came home to care for him.”
He opened the door and gestured for Finn to enter. The lights came on and Finn saw that the bedroom was more like an efficiency apartment. One big room with a tiny kitchen area at one end. At the other end was a walk in closet and the door to the bathroom. The kitchen had a two burner stove, a small sink, a microwave and a refrigerator. The main part of the room held a double bed, a futon sofa, a small desk with a chair and a laptop, and built in cabinets and shelves that held a flat screen television, a small stereo and lots of mystery novels. All the cupboards, desk, built in cabinets and shelves were in the same pale wood as the rest of the house.
“You’re welcome to make use of my kitchen or you can keep to yourself and use this one. It doesn’t matter to me. I’m downstairs more than I’m up here,” Jake said in a voice devoid of emotion. “I can get you some foodstuffs so you won’t feel obligated to eat with me. Tomorrow I’ll show you around the studio and we’ll go over your duties.”
Finn nodded and set his bag on the floor beside the bed. “Thank you. I appreciate you taking me in.” He tried to keep his voice from wobbling, but he could still hear the note of uncertainty in it.
Jake smiled and Finn could see that the guy was trying to put him at ease. The smile lit up his already handsome face and Finn’s breath caught. He’d never been so instantly and strongly attracted to a man. Mild lust mixed with a lot of curiosity had been a part of his sex life before he’d been collared. Afterward, it had been all about his master and never Finn. Finn didn’t even know if he could come anymore, at least not without an order to do so.
“Ray and Gavin and I have a deal when it comes to the club. We don’t let submissives be mistreated there and we help those who have been mistreated. This is the first time I’ve taken someone in, but Ray and Gavin have before and so has our friend Nick. We want to keep our part of the leather community on the up and up.” Jake rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Your former master? He’s not from around here is he?”