Black Butterfly (16 page)

“Seandra…
”
              “Why haven’t you called me?”
              “Because you told me not to. Remember?”

I ran my fingers through my hair in frustration. “That’s never stopped you before. You could have at least tried to redeem yourself. I’m a wreck and you seem to be just fine. I’m on set now and had to take a break. Are you feeling anything like I am? If you are why didn’t you call?”

He sighed. “Of course I’m a wreck. I took the past couple weeks off because of it. Once again I didn’t call because you told me not to.”

“Okay damn, I see that you’re going to keep throwing that in my face. We are engaged Maurice. It really boils down to the fact that you seem to have no intentions of really marrying me.”

“I love you woman and I miss you okay. I’ll drive down there in a few hours and we will set a date. Alright?”

He seemed to be trying to make things okay between us
, so I folded against my will. “Are you taking care of yourself?” I asked with sincere concern.

“Yes. I haven’t been using Seandra. I admit that I had a few drinks, but I’ve slowed down on the coke.” He chuckled. “Well, I may have had more than a few.”

“I love you too Maurice. I will see you later tonight.”

“For sure.”

I smiled and hung up the phone. I honestly believed that our relationship could work. If I nurtured him he wouldn’t need drugs, alcohol, or women. I’d show him that all he needed was my love.

Chapter 11

Seantay

“Damn, if Raheem calls me one more damn time,” I hissed slamming my phone on the table.

Reba and I were at Kuruma Zushi
in Midtown NYC, because we were both craving sushi. We’d been pampered for hours at Mandarin Oriental. It was by far the best spa in New York City, and it was well worth the thousand dollars for the eighty minute massage. Now we were starving.

“Talk to him Seantay. At least he told you about her. She could be just trying to keep you and Raheem apart. Women are shady sweety. Especially those exes and baby’s mamas.”

              Rolling my eyes I said, “Well, I don’t need the drama. That’s the reason I do not deal with relationships. They are too much work and take too much dedication for me. The only thing that I put work and dedication into is myself.” I laughed as my cell rang again. The caller ID displayed Raheem’s number. I answered despite my comments.

             
“Look Raheem, I will call you when I get back to Florida. I am busy right now,” I said.

             
After we hung up I confided in my best friend. I couldn’t hide anything from her.

             
“I can’t deny the fact that I’m very into Raheem. I try to deny what I feel, but I can’t anymore. What we have between us is deeper than a physical attraction. I actually enjoy being with him. This pregnant ex bullshit makes me wish I could just stop caring about him.”

             
Reba took a sip of her white zinfandel and rolled her eyes. “You can’t turn your feelings off sweetheart. You’re just going to have to deal with how you feel and admit that you’re falling for him.”

             
“I am not falling for him Reba. It’s not that deep. I am thinking that I need to just leave Raheem alone and see what’s up with Dean. Besides, we are in New York.” We toasted our wine glasses.

             
Grinning at me Reba said, “You know what. Let’s just enjoy ourselves and forget all of the drama back home.”

             
“I’ll drink to that,” I said draining my glass.

*                           *                                    *

              A few days later our plane safely landed in Miami. I couldn’t believe how happy I was to be at home. New York was just too damn cold for me. I’d come back with a lot more than I’d left with due to my shopping addiction. Our driver Edwin picked us up right on time. I couldn’t wait to have some good old southern cuisine, so we stopped at Pappadeux for lunch before dropping Reba off.

             
“I will call you as soon as I unpack,” I said once we’d pulled up to Reba’s apartment complex.

             
Reba laughed. “Well, I guess I will talk to you next week with all that shit you bought.”

             
She suddenly became serious. “You never called Dean.”

             
“I know. I was just too busy,” I said making excuses.

             
“Okay, cool. Talk to you later,” Reba said before walking toward her apartment.

             
Edwin drove off and I relaxed. The silence forced me to turn on some music. Edwin was always quiet. Once we made it to the estate I ran up to my room to relax. Kicking off my shoes I pressed play on my answering machine.

             
“You have five messages,” the recording stated in its monotone voice.

             
Two of the messages were from Reco. I though he was over it. I decided to just delete his messages without listening to them. Raheem had left two and the last one was from Dean.

             
“Hi Seantay. It’s Dean. I was calling because I gave you my card, but you never called. As a matter of fact I found my card on the ground in the parking lot. I figured you’d dropped it by mistake. I mean, you wouldn’t have dropped it on purpose. I hope,” he chuckled. “Look, I want to see you again. Call me. Please. Yes, I am literally begging. The number is…”

             
I stopped the message because I had his number. He intrigued me, but the situation with Raheem had put a bad taste in my mouth. I wondered how he’d gotten my number. Well, he’d just have to wait.

*             *               *

              A couple days later I decided to go ahead and call Dean. I’d told Raheem the day before that it was best that we just stopped seeing one another. He took it in stride, but I could see the hurt in his eyes. I tried to convince myself that it was better that way, but it was hard. Dean would be a good distraction. Besides, I didn’t have time for Raheem and his baby mama drama anyway.

             
Dean seemed happy to finally hear from me. “Oh, I thought you’d forgotten about me,” he said.

             
“No. I’ve just been pretty busy.”

             
“Okay. I can believe that ma. I’ve been busy myself, but I made the time to call you,” he pointed out.

             
“Yeah. That must’ve been important to you.”

             
“It’s important that I keep in touch with you. I am feeling you Seantay, and I think you’re feeling me too. You’re just playing hard.”

             
He was cocky, but cute. “So, how did you get my number?”

             
“I’m not revealing my sources. Have you considered what we talked about at the shoot?” He asked.

             
I smiled. “Yes, but I don’t know if I want to give you my designs.
 

             
“You won’t be giving them to me.”

             
“True, but they’ll have your name on them and not mine. Shit, I’m trying to get some shine too.”

             
He understood my point. “Okay ma. I hear you. I will let you keep the sketches you’ve already done, although I really like them. You can design for me and then establish yourself. After that you can start your own line and design the sketches that you have now.”

             
“I’ll think about it.” I couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear. He’d say anything to see me again.

             
“I can still smell your perfume. It was so soft and feminine, yet it had my nose open. Did you think about what else we talked about?” He asked changing the subject quickly.

             
I didn’t say anything.

“Hello? Are you still there?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I was just thinking. I have to make a few runs. I need some shoes to wear with this beautiful yellow, cabaret style dress that I just bought. I want to wear it tonight when you take me out. Oh, and I know you’re here because I see that you’ve called me from your room at my father’s luxury Miami Beach hotel.”

“You’re something else baby girl,” he said impressed by how straight forward I was.

“I know. I will call you later.”

“
Oh, and from now on I am designing all of your dresses.”

*                          *                         *

Seandra

“Maurice, what time does our plane leave?” I asked still getting dressed.

“We have less than an hour to get to the airport. So hurry up!” He yelled from the restroom.

Maurice had been invited to the awards ceremony for
the Young Black Entrepreneurs.There would be a fundraising dinner after the awards ceremony and plenty of parties to attend later that night. This year everything would be held in New Orleans. Usually Renell attended, but Seantay had informed me that she wouldn’t be attending this year. Great. We were still not talking to one another. It was no denying our sibling rivalry. We were close as children, but once we’d hit adolescence it was over.

“C’mon Seandra! Damnit, you’re
the slowest woman in the world!” He yelled from the living room.

“Shut up, you were just in the restroom,” I snapped at him and grabbed a pair of Chloe sunglasses. After leaving my bedroom I realized that I had to use the restroom myself. I ran into the hall bathroom despite Maurice’s protests.

“Ahh, we’re going to miss our flight!” He yelled in annoyance.

Sashaying to the toilet, I raised my skirt and sat down gently. That’s when I saw the syringe. It was right there on the sink plain as day. He didn’t try to conceal it. I wiped quickly and washed my hands. After I’d dried them I picked up the syringe with a paper towel and exited the restroom.

“Hurry up baby!”

“I’m coming!” I yelled making my way into the living room. “What the hell is this? Coke isn’t strong enough for you anymore?
”

Dropping his eyes to the floor, he looked ashamed because I’d caught his ass.

“So now you’re a damn dope fiend?” I asked.

“No baby, no. I…I…I…damn,” he stuttered nervously.

I couldn’t even look at him. He walked toward me. “No Maurice. Stay over there.” He disgusted me. “Go on to New Orleans. I’m not going.”

He continued to walk toward me and I backed up.

“Baby listen to me,” he pleaded. “Let me explain.”

“What the fuck is there for you to explain Maurice? There was a syringe in my restroom. The evidence is right here. You used the restroom right before I did!” I held the syringe up for him to see. “You can’t deny it.”

He grabbed me and tried to embrace me. “Seandra, it’s my medicine.”

“You’re sick!” I spat angrily.

“Yes, I am sick Seandra. Shit, but not mentally baby. I’m diabetic,” he explained.

“You’re diabetic?” I asked. “You never once told me that. After all this time we’ve been together and you’re now telling me this?”

“I didn’t want to tell you because you would be way bossier than you already are. I don’t need my woman telling me what I can and cannot eat, or how much liquor I can drink and…”

“How much coke you can snort!” I interjected
. “How could you keep this from me? You’re so damn selfish Maurice. You could’ve gone into a diabetic coma and I would’ve been absolutely oblivious to your condition. How have you managed to hide this from me for so long? I have never seen you with a needle or bottle of insulin. You’re really good at keeping secrets, but they always come to the light somehow. Eventually you’ll leave some kind of evidence just sitting around.”

“I’d always wrap up the needles in something before I threw them in the trash. I keep my insulin and needles in a small refrigerator at my h
ome. When I am here I just hide the insulin in the fridge and the needles in my shaving bag.”

I shook my head. I was heated, but
not enough to pass up a trip to New Orleans. We would continue our beef later. I was just glad he wasn’t shooting up. “Let’s go stupid.” I led the way and he followed.

*             *                   *

Renell

“I am so tired,” Ricky yawned and stretched out on the huge king sized bed in our lovely hotel suite. Our plane had just landed in New Orleans and we were both ready to unwind before getting our party on.
I’d already decided that we would visit my grandparents before we left.