Black Keys (The Colorblind Trilogy #1) (57 page)

It was easier to stick to what Joseph had said: in the kingdom, I fell in love with the Crown Prince and we got married, then I decided to stay there. I added my own lines though: I told whoever cared enough to ask and whomever
I
cared enough to tell that we’d talked online for months before I left, and that I hadn’t told anyone because we both didn’t want the media to know. We’d had a cozy and warm wedding, and I came back to have a few tests done, and take care of things regarding the company that I didn’t want Joseph to have to do all alone. My husband didn’t come with me because he had lots of responsibilities he couldn’t get away from. It wasn’t all lies. And if anyone found any part of it to be unbelievable, I really didn’t care. At all.

One day, I asked my grandfather,
“Papa, what’s one of the hardest things in life?”
and he told me,
“To lose something that was so good, and then find so many things that keep reminding you of how you don’t have it anymore.”

Home didn’t feel like home. Comfort wasn’t anywhere to be found. I didn’t feel as safe as I’d thought I would feel. I only slept when my eyes were too dry to produce more tears. And when I woke up, I was about to call Mona’s name, only to remember she wasn’t anywhere around. It brought tears to my eyes.

Just thinking about getting out of bed almost had me on my knees on the bathroom floor. I didn’t want to get up. I wanted to go to sleep and maybe be able to dream again. Of him. It was so hard to believe that just a little over two days ago I was in his arms, hearing his heartbeat and inhaling his sweet scent. And now...I had none of that. Not him, not his closeness, not his warmth, and not the comfort only he was able to make me feel.

I couldn’t eat the pancakes my housekeeper made me for breakfast on Monday morning. I couldn’t drink my coffee without wondering if Mazen had had his tea for the morning already or not. Remembering the first morning after the wedding, how I’d thought we didn’t like to have same drink in the morning, and how we didn’t have that in common. I couldn’t believe how shallow I was just a week ago. It was actually embarrassing.

“Morning, Brad,” I greeted him with a nod.

“Miss Archer,” he nodded his head, “good morning.”

“Follow me to my office, please,” I said. Inside the office that was in my house, I told him what I needed him to do.

Brad had been my bodyguard since I started going to college, and was someone I trusted with my life–obviously. But Joseph was able to convince me that I couldn’t bring him to the kingdom, because it was rude. I didn’t get it, but he was able to convince me that we would be protected by the royal guards. Despite how much I didn’t like that, and how much Brad himself didn’t like it either, I still did what Joseph told me. Because I trusted him. Because I was a fool.

“Miss Archer, are you sure you want to do this?” Brad asked. I could sense the disbelief and confusion in his voice.

“Positive,” I said, and when I was sure he would do everything I’d asked for as planned, I went to the company’s headquarters.

One day, I asked my grandfather,
“Papa, what’s one of the hardest things in life?”
and he told me,
“When someone you love dies–but only in your eyes.”

“Is Joseph free?” I asked Terri as I handed her my briefcase.

“He’s in a meeting that should end in five minutes,” she replied.

“Good. Which room?”

“Conference room three.” I headed there right away, after telling her not to inform him I was there, Brad following right behind me.

The wait wasn’t long, my thoughts kept me too busy to feel any kind of boredom as I waited for him to finish his meeting. I pulled the end of the sleeve of my white suit jacket, straightening it, making sure I looked as confident as possible, because I knew I couldn’t show him how broken I really was, couldn’t show him just how much damage he had done.

When he came out, he didn’t notice me right away, he was busy saying goodbye to a client, and I took that moment to study his form, seeing the things that I knew only I could see. I saw that underneath the smile he kept on his face, he was pretty much broken. Maybe as much as I was, even.

I could see the dark circles under his eyes that told of sleepless nights, could see his scraggy cheeks that told of a lost appetite. He just wasn’t well.

Good,
I thought.

My heart simply couldn’t soften for him. It couldn’t. Any good memory I’d ever shared with him was long gone. Anything nice we’d given each other was simply lost. This wasn’t my brother. My brother had died long ago–in my eyes, that is.

“Marie!” His eyes landed on me and his tongue uttered my name in disbelief. I could see his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed thickly, his look betraying him and revealing how he was shocked and worried at the same time, though I could tell he didn’t want to show it.

“Hello Brother!” I said with a tight smile that was only there to tell him how much I was disgusted by his presence, and I knew he could easily understand it. “What? You thought you’d never see me again?”

“Uh…”

“Let’s go inside, you don’t want us to make a scene, now do you?” I said then I waved him inside. “After you.”

He paused for a moment, obviously not knowing if he should come inside or not, but finally realizing he couldn’t get away from it. The look in his eyes when he found out that Brad would be joining us was just priceless.

I sat down at the head of the table, having him sit on the opposite end, and then Brad put the file in front of him.

“What’s this?”

“Sign” was all I replied with.

He opened the file and his eyes widened. “You’ve got to be kidding me!” he said in shock. “You want me to sign my rights to the company over to you?”

“Exactly!”

“Absolutely not!” he said, jerking the file away from him.

“Brad!” I called, my eyes not leaving my brother, who was snarling at me while I smiled, as if my heart wasn’t breaking from the inside.

Like he had been told to do, in one second, Brad pulled his gun out of his jacket pocket and put it to Joseph’s head.

My eyes stung with the tears I wanted to shed at the sight of him all shocked, scared and frightened.

I’d made sure Brad understood very well that hurting Joseph wasn’t my intention, not at all, but I needed him to taste his own medicine. He deserved to experience some of what he’d put me through.

“Marie, what are you doing?” His voice had none of the venom it’d had in it when he spoke to me just a minute ago; his eyes were pleading and his hands were shaking slightly.

“Just like you did, Joseph,” I told him. “I’m forcing you into signing your approval of something I know you wouldn’t ever want.”

“You can’t be serious!” he said.

“Oh, I am, and you
will
sign, Joseph,” I said, getting up and going to stand only two steps away from where he was sitting. “You know why?” I asked, not waiting for his answer. “Because you’re afraid, you have a gun pointed to your head, and all you can think about right now is how, if you don’t please the one who has you at their mercy, your head will be blown off–and you don’t want that.”

“Marie, stop this! I did something wrong but it was the only thing I could do,” he swallowed. “You wouldn’t have ever agreed and I had to save Janna. I didn’t have time to convince you, and you wouldn’t ever be convinced. I knew you wouldn’t. It was the only option I had.”

I snorted, “Because you’re an idiot. She had a wonderful brother who would save her no matter what, a brother who you couldn’t be compared with no matter how much you tried.” Tears finally found their way out of my eyes. “Do you have any idea what you put me through?”

“I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry, I had no other choice,” he begged.

“You put me in that car again, Joseph,” my voice cracked, and my tears wet my cheeks even more. “I was all alone, trapped in one place while the whole world was in chaos around me. I knew no one, I had no idea what was to come. Many times I wondered if I would be raped, or be killed if I didn’t obey. Many times I wondered if I’d ever see a familiar face again. You broke me, Joseph. Broke me!” I cried. “And better yet, you felt no hint of guilt about it, you never thought about me or how I would be feeling.”

“Don’t say that, Marie! You don’t know anything,” he said in a low voice. “I was dying from the inside, but I had to do it. Janna had always told me about Mazen and how noble he is I knew he’d take good care of you.”

His words took a minute to register in my mind, and the ache in my heart grew, just realizing how true those words really were. “But what if he wasn’t? What if he was a savage who would’ve forced himself on me, and done whatever he wanted to the helpless girl he had at his mercy? Did you ever think of that?”

He didn’t reply; He closed his eyes, freeing tears of guilt that caused me nothing but pride at what I’d accomplished. I hoped he would burn every day with the knowledge of what he’d made me face.

“Sign the papers, Joseph,” I told him. “I can’t trust you with myself, and I sure can’t trust you with my parents’ hard-earned success.”

“I can’t do it,” he said forcibly, and right at the same second he spoke the words, Brad turned the gun and hit the back of his head, blood spilling onto the collar of his white shirt right away like a river. Joseph cried out in agony, causing me to flinch at the sight, my heart hurting for my brother’s pain.

“Sign the papers, you piece of shit, or I sure as fuck won’t wait for her orders to pull the trigger,” Brad shouted, and it was only then that I noticed what this conversation was doing to him. He was burning with anger. He cared for me, I knew he did. I hadn’t told him any of the reasons why I was doing this to my own brother, but was glad that he now understood my actions.

It didn’t take him any more convincing after that, he just signed them silently, and when he put the pen on the table, Brad put his gun back in his suit jacket pocket.

“Is there anything else you need?” By this point he was choking up, apparently trying his hardest to stop his tears from falling or his pain from showing. He was failing miserably.

“No. I don’t want to see your face in here again. Ever,” I said, and he got up to leave, putting his hand on the back of his head where his wound was. Before he went out the door, I added, “I’ve transferred five hundred million dollars to your bank account. It’s your fair share, I’m not as low as you are.” I didn’t wait to see his reaction to that; I turned my back to him and waited for him to leave, letting more tears fall when I knew he couldn’t see them.

Revenge didn’t feel nice. Nothing felt nice at all. I was too hurt to feel anything but hurt. Too broken to feel anything but pain.

I missed my brother. But
that
wasn’t him.