Blind Ice (Razors Ice Book 5) (19 page)

“Don’t you even say it.” She grabbed him by the shoulders and spun him around so she could straddle him. Then she bent down and kissed him until he could say nothing at all.

* * *

When Kate received a phone call from Dr. Mallan, it was an unexpected surprise. When he told her that Logan had called and cancelled his surgery, she was even more surprised. In fact, she was livid.

“You didn’t cancel it, did you?” she asked Dr. Mallan.

This was not good. Surgery was the only chance he had at being able to play hockey again.

“No,” Dr. Mallan answered. “I have confidence in your ability to persuade him it’s the right decision.”

It was the only decision in Kate’s mind.

When she called Logan, he didn’t answer. Realizing she shouldn’t have even bothered trying to contact him by phone, Kate did what she should have done in the first place. She raced over to his house and marched up to his front door, prepared to give him a piece of her mind.

When he swung the door open, she let loose. “So, you fire Dr. Mallan and then you won’t return my calls?” She planted her hands on her hips.

“I didn’t fire him, I’m just not having the operation. And my phone is broken. I have to get a new one.”

“And why the hell aren’t you having the operation?” she shrieked.

His expression changed. “God, you’re gorgeous when you’re mad.”

“I’m—” She didn’t finish the sentence because he cupped the back of her neck and crushed his mouth to hers. At first she protested, but when his tongue pushed through her lips, she opened for him and greeted him with her own. She kissed him hard.

His lips moved over hers with a passion she’d only read about. He pulled her inside the house, slammed her against the wall and pinned her there while his mouth had its way with hers. Then his hands moved over her arms, then her waist and then up to cup her breast. She moaned at the contact and he swallowed the sound as it escaped her lips.

He was a man, no
animal
, possessed. Driven by need and desire. Desperate to escape the turmoil in his head. She was warm and as hungry as he was and he needed her to distract him from reality. Needed her in order to cope. But he also wanted her. Wanted her in ways that had nothing to do with the situation with his eye.

She ran her hands up under his shirt and found his toned abs and hard chest. Her hands slid over his smooth skin and tangled in the course hair on his chest.

His mouth claimed the hollow of her throat, the slope of her neck and her clavicle. He needed her and she couldn’t think of anywhere else she’d rather be.

When they had rid each other of their clothes, he pushed inside her, stretching her to accommodate the length of him. He slowed down the kiss and kissed her nice and slow.

Pinned between the wall and Logan’s hard body, Kate rode the waves of pleasure and clung to him as she climaxed. With one final grunt, he moaned and collapsed against her, claiming his own blessed release.

Unable to hold up her own weight any longer, her legs began to tremble. He guided her down to the floor and sat her on the steps. They’d been in this exact same position before and this time the sex hadn’t been any less satisfying.

They sat on the stairs catching their breath, basking in the afterglow. There was definitely something magnetic between the two of them and Logan knew he’d been foolish to try and fight it.

“We seem to end up like this a lot,” Kate pointed out while lazily stroking her fingers over his chest.

“Yeah,” he panted.

“One of these times we should try and make it to a bed.”

“I can never wait that long.”

When his hand snaked up her bare thigh, she stopped him. If he thought he could keep using sex to escape from his problems, then Logan Murray had another thing coming.

“Don’t think you can distract me with sex,” she warned.

“You’re not going to be happy until we talk about this, are you?”

“I just want to understand.”

Tension tightened his muscles and his hands curled into fists. When he tried to pull away from her, Kate held tight.

“There’s nothing wrong with being afraid,” she said gently. “It’s okay to be scared.”

“I’m not scared,” he snapped.

The truth was that Logan was more scared than he’d ever been before. More than the time his sister had fallen through the ice at Moln Lake. More than the time he’d thought he’d been passed over for the draft. More than when he had thought he’d lost Kate.

He was scared shitless that the operation wouldn’t work and he’d be blind in one eye for the rest of his life. Blind.

Blind
.

Just the sound of the word scared the hell out of him because he knew what it meant. It meant he would never be able to play hockey again.
Hockey
. His lifeblood, his passion, his everything.

Kate ignored his stubbornness. “If it were me, I know I’d be scared out of my mind. But I know how determined you are. I know how hard you worked to get into the UNHL in the first place. And I know you would do anything it takes to keep playing hockey. Even if that means taking the biggest risk of your life to do it.”

He sighed. “That’s some pep talk you’ve got there, Doc.”

“I just know how important the game is to you. And I know that everything is riding on this operation.”

“Yeah. Everything. My future. My sight. My
life
. God, Kate, how the hell could you even know what I’m going through?”

She didn’t. But she did know what was important to him. “If you don’t have the operation you won’t be able to play hockey anyway.”

That stabbed him straight to his core.

Logan raked his hands through his hair. She was right. She was right about everything. The same way her sister had been right about his bullheadedness. But it still didn’t change the fact that fear clawed at him during every waking moment.

“What if he fucks it up, Kate?” Human error was what frightened him most. People made too many damn mistakes. He couldn’t get the oil changed in his car without somebody screwing something up. How the hell was this Dr. Mallan guy going to patch up his eye good enough so he could play hockey again? Once wrong slice and he could be permanently blind in that eye.

But sometimes a man had to push past fear and into the unknown. Even if it was only darkness that awaited him.

“Dr. Mallan is very capable,” she assured him. “He’s the leading specialist in complex microsurgery. You’ll be in good hands, I promise. He does exceptional work. I know firsthand because he performed my Lasik surgery.”

Huh. Kate had trusted him to laser her eyes and she could see just fine. Knowing that made Logan feel a little bit better about her colleague’s capability.

“Will you be there during the operation?” he asked.

“I can be.”

“Good, because I want you there when I go under the knife.”

In that moment, he decided he was ready to fight. And he definitely had something worth fighting for.

If Kate believed in him and their love, then he supposed it would be more than enough to see them through whatever the results of the surgery were. Kate told him to put trust in his medical team and Logan had faith in Kate. That was that.

He just hoped it was enough.

* * *

Julia waited patiently for news about Logan. She knew all too well the fear he was experiencing. The waiting and having no control. When she was a little girl, she knew she was losing her sight, just waiting for it to slip away completely. But Logan still had a chance. If the fates were feeling generous, he just might not be banished to a world of darkness like her.

When VINCE announced the call, Julia crossed her fingers and answered.

“He’s okay, JuJu.” Kate’s voice was shaky yet relieved. “The surgery was a success.”

Julia sat back with a sigh and patted Shamus on the head.

Thank goodness for small miracles.

Chapter Twenty-One

Hero

A week later, before Gabe even had the chance to sit down, his boss was calling him into his office. Or his assistant was at least. The guy didn’t seem to do anything himself. If it couldn’t be delegated, then it wasn’t a job worth doing. It was such a noble motto.

Gabe knew he wasn’t being summoned to reminisce about his vacation. No, Killingsworth was all business all the time and that was okay with him. Gabe didn’t require personal relationships with the guy who signed his checks, just aloofness and a common goal.

Gabe unwrapped a piece of gum, chewed it, then stuck it to the roof of his mouth.

Here we go
, he told himself.

Suddenly it was all happening so fast. This was the meeting where he told Killingsworth that he’d have the software ready for distribution by the end of the month. Think of how many people would benefit from his program! Once he had it running at optimal performance it would literally change people’s lives.

Damn, it felt good to be a part of something so beneficial to society. Imagine the amputee who no longer had to control his computer with his teeth. The paraplegic who could interact with people worldwide from their computer. Or the blind teen who could surf the internet, check e-mail, and shop just by saying a few simple commands out loud.

Gabe walked into the executive’s office feeling much like he’d entered the lion’s den.

Killingsworth waved in to take a seat while he wrapped up a phone call. “Absolutely,” he was saying. “We are very excited. I’m putting my best guy on the project.” He looked at Gabe and Gabe briefly wondered if he was referring to him. He really didn’t want to start a new project when he had so many loose ends to tie up with VINCE.

Killingsworth hung up the phone, put his fingers into a triangle and looked at Gabe. He eyed the software designer in that critical way he had of looking at people. “I trust you enjoyed your vacation.”

The condescending tone of his voice made Gabe grind his teeth. It wasn’t like he’d spent months traipsing around on a world-wide vacation. He’d taken one measly week to finally go have a life—and he still had another week to use later. But a guy like Killingsworth didn’t understand that. He expected Gabe and the rest of his employees to eat, sleep and breathe Intelliteck. Well, that’s exactly what Gabe had been doing up until last week. And now it was the only thing he had left to do.

“Yes,” Gabe said simply, keeping his thoughts to himself.

Killingsworth gave a curt nod and got back to business. “We are ceasing development on project…” He looked down at the notes on his desk. “VA7497.”

Gabe just stared at the man sitting in front of him.

VINCE was VA7497
.

* * *

Julia was dreaming. It was hot, much too hot and the air was stifling. She couldn’t breathe. Was something heavy sitting on her chest? An elephant perhaps? Maybe she was dreaming about summers at the beach. When they were kids, Kate would bury Julia in the wet sand and the weight of it would sit heavy on her chest. She hadn’t been able to move her arms and legs and just wiggled until she could finally break free. The sun would beat down mercilessly on their shoulders and they would return to the beach house sunburned and their eyes gritty from the salt water.

When Julia wiggled her fingers and toes now, she soon realized her sheet covered her and not sand.

This wasn’t a dream.

After escaping the clutches of sleep and regaining her bearings, she could hear Shamus barking. It was a shrill, urgent bark. There must be another squirrel in the house.

Julia let out a groan. How was she supposed to keep the little critters from getting inside her apartment while still allowing Shamus outside?

“Shamus? What’s going on?” She sat up and immediately smelled smoke.

Shamus barked a reply using his “
come on
” voice.

The smell of smoke was getting stronger. “Is there a fire or something?”

Shamus barked again.

Cassidy hissed beside Julia on the bed. When Julia reached for the cat, she was met with Cassidy’s rigid body. Julia gathered her up and tucked her into the crook of her arm the best she could so she could have one hand free to hold onto Shamus. “It’s okay, honey,” she told the frightened cat.

“Let’s get out of here,” she told Shamus.

Cassidy clawed at her, scraping razor-sharp claws down her arms, but Julia ignored the pain. Cassidy continued to growl and struggle against her grip, but Julia held tight. Whatever was happening inside the apartment must be a scary enough sight to cause Cassidy to exhibit such panic.

“There must be a fire,” Julia mumbled.

She felt Shamus try to grab Cassidy by the scruff of her neck with his teeth. “I got her, Shamus. Let’s go.” Remembering her cell phone, she grabbed it from the nightstand, unplugged it from the charger and slipped it into her pocket.

Shamus nudged her slippers onto her feet and led her down the hall. It was warmer here. The fire must be close. Maybe even inside her apartment. The window in the bedroom was too tall to crawl out of, so they had to keep moving.

Trying to remember her emergency training from blind school, Julia stayed low, crouched below a blanket of eye watering smoke.

The smoke was thicker toward the living room, but Julia trusted that Shamus would lead her away from the danger and not straight into it. He barked impatiently and Julia quickened her pace.

The air was hot. Her skin felt like it might singe in the heat, but she followed Shamus’s lead and put one foot in front of the other. Heat licked at her skin and she hurried forward.

As they made their way down the hallway, VINCE squawked from the living room. “The current temperature exceeds optimal performance.”

Julia cursed herself for letting her phone die last night. If it hadn’t been turned off and charging, VINCE would have alerted her through the device. But, because of how soundly she slept, she probably wouldn’t have heard it anyway.

When they turned the corner, the heat subsided substantially and Julia took her first full inhale and exhale of the last five minutes. Inside the bathroom, she let go of Shamus and felt for the toilet. There was a window directly above it and she fumbled with the lock. Shamus must have realized it would be just big enough for her to squeeze through.

With one arm, Julia held tight to Cassidy and with the other hand she worked on getting the window open. She pushed as hard as she could and finally got the window unlocked and up. Luckily, the screen popped out easily.

At the first sign of freedom, Cassidy growled and clawed Julia, slipping out of her hold.

“Cassidy!” Julia cried, but the cat had already jumped out the window and was gone.

Crap
. Julia grabbed a fistful of her own hair and tugged. Cassidy was strictly an indoor cat and probably wouldn’t know the first thing about defending herself or surviving in the great outdoors. Julia hoped she hadn’t gone far and that she’d be able to find her once she was outside.

Shamus barked, reminding her that this wasn’t the time to worry about the fluffy deserter. She could feel the heat at her back and knew that Shamus was right. There wasn’t much time.

She crawled on top of the toilet seat and knelt on the tank. She could feel Shamus bump into her from behind, urging her on. Gripping the window ledge tight, she took a deep breath. She’d jumped out of an airplane on her birthday last year and had hiked to the top of August Falls the year before that. Climbing out of a one-story window in a burning building should be a piece of cake.

Swinging one leg out the window and then the other, she slowly lowered herself the few feet to the ground. When her feet touched the grass, she sighed in relief. Quickly, she stepped aside so Shamus could get out behind her. She heard his claws clatter on the porcelain, a grunt, and then another grunt along with a whimper, as he landed on the ground. He nudged her leg and she took hold of the scruff of his neck and he led her away from the building.

Just then a loud explosion rang out behind her.

* * *

“Funding was reallocated to a distribution program for merchandise distributors and we have decided to terminate the project.”

Gabe’s throat was too dry to speak. VINCE had been terminated before he could show them how amazing it could be.

It was over.

Just like that, Killingsworth had swatted VINCE away like it was a pesky fly trying to ruin his picnic. And then he had the nerve to sit like a lion in his big leather executive chair and eye Gabe like he was a lame gazelle.

Gabe opened his mouth to speak but then shut it again. The entire reason he’d come back to Chicago had just been terminated. He and Wesley had worked for years perfecting and developing the software. They had put their miniscule lives on hold and devoted too many hours to count on the project and Killingsworth had terminated it without even blinking an eye. There was no emotion on the older man’s face. No flicker of remorse or sympathy for shutting down Gabe’s pet project, his baby.

“Will I still be able to retain the rights to the program?” Something clicked inside Gabe’s brain and he was already thinking ahead. He would feel the anger later, he was sure of it. But for right now, he was in survival mode and there was still time to save VINCE.

Killingsworth curled his top lip. “That won’t be a problem. Intelliteck doesn’t wish to be…
associated
with the software. I’ll have Jane draw up the necessary paperwork for you.”

Gabe’s hands fisted at his sides. So, not only had Intelliteck stopped work on the program, they wanted to wash their hands of it altogether. At least they wouldn’t put up a fight when Gabe tried to claim what was rightfully his.

“We are moving forward with the CosteMart retrofit,” Killingsworth continued. “I’ll e-mail you and your team the specs.”

Gabe nodded. “I’ll get with Wesley about the details.” Why was he saying this? He didn’t want to get with Wesley about some meaningless CosteMart specs. He wanted to finalize the programming for VINCE.

“Great.” Killingsworth turned to his computer and Gabe was forgotten. “Close the door behind you, please.”

Gabe stood up, left Killingsworth’s office and shut the door behind him like the lackey he was. When he heard the soft click of the door, he forced himself to blink and draw in breath. That was it. It was all over. It had been so sudden that he hadn’t even been able to prepare a rebuttal. But even if he had, Killingsworth’s decision would have been the same. If Intelliteck couldn’t glean billions of dollars from a finished project, then they didn’t want anything to do with it. Whether or not it would actually help millions of people and regardless of the fact that they’d already funded thousands during development.

Back inside his office, Gabe sat and stared at the numbers on his screen until they blurred together. What the fuck had just happened? One minute he was changing people’s lives for the better and the next he was entering codes for a program to move conveyor belts more efficiently. Working on interface for shipping lanes and conveyor belts wasn’t where his heart was. This wasn’t what he was meant to be doing with his life and his skills. Hadn’t Julia told him something along those lines?

Gabe shoved the computer mouse away and scrubbed his hands over his face.

There was a team meeting scheduled in five minutes to go over the specifications for the new software. But he couldn’t focus on a new project. Especially one that required qualifications well below his pay grade. What about VINCE? What about helping Julia and thousands of others like her?

Gabe set everything into motion quickly. He didn’t think any of it through, but he didn’t really have to. He knew exactly what he had to do.

* * *

Outside, on the lawn that stretched across the back of the apartment complex, Julia sucked in a lungful of fresh air. She couldn’t see it, but behind her the entire apartment complex was engulfed in angry orange flames. The fact that she and her pets had managed to escape the inferno was a miracle in itself.

She called out for Cassidy, but there was no response. Julia could faintly hear the voices of her neighbors, but they must have been all the way around the front of the building.

As she walked beside Shamus to put some distance between them and the fire, she noticed that Shamus felt wobbly. Was he limping?

When he allowed her to stop at the edge of the lawn, Julia bent down and felt for some sign of injury. He whimpered when her hands ran over his belly. Her fingers came away sticky. Was that blood?

“What happened, buddy?” Did he injure himself during his climb out the window? Had the fire been worse than she thought?

His answer was a whine. It was a different sound than she’d heard him make before.

Something was wrong. She needed help. Not for herself, but for poor Shamus. And where in the hell was Cassidy?

Fire truck sirens wailed in the distance, so she didn’t call 911 but called Kate instead. Fortunately, she had thought to grab her phone on the way out.

“Kate, there’s been a fire. I got out okay, but I think something’s wrong with Shamus.”